One Thousand and One Nights

by Richard Burton

  Once upon a time, O King of the Age, I had a slipper which hardly belonged to its kind nor ever was there seen a bigger. Now one day of the days I waxed aweary of it and sware to myself that I would never wear it any more; so in mine anger I flung it away and it fortuned to fall upon the flat roof of a Khwájah’s house where the stucco was weakest. Thence it dropped through, striking a shelf that held a number of phials full of the purest rose-water and the boarding yielded breaking all the bottles and spilling their contents. The house-folk heard the breakage ringing and rattling; so they crowded one after other to discover what had done the damage and at last they found my papoosh sprawling amiddlemost the room. Then they made sure that the shelf had not been broken except by the violence of that slipper, and they examined it when, behold, the house-master cried, saying, “This be the papoosh of Abu Kasim the Drummer.” Hereupon he took it and carried it to the Governor who summoned me and set me before him; then he made me responsible for the phials and whatso was therein and for the repairing of the terrace-roof and upraising it again. And lastly he handed to me the slipper which was exceedingly long and broad and heavy and, being cruel old it showed upwards of an hundred and thirty patches nor was it unknown to any of the villagers. So I took it and fared forth and, being anangered with the article, I resolved to throw it into some dark hole or out-of-the-way place; ?And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O sister mine, and enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Four Hundred and Second Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that Abu Kasim the Drummer continued to the Sultan; I resolved to throw it into some dark hole or out-of-the-way place; and presently I came to the watercloset of the Hammam and cast it into the conduit saying, “Now shall none ever see it again; nor shall I be troubled with its foul aspect for the rest of my life.” Then I returned home and abode there the first day and the second, but about noon on the third a party of the Governor’s men came and seized me and bore me before him; and no sooner did he see me than he cried out, “Throw him!” Accordingly they laid me out at fullest length and gave me an hundred cuts with a scourge252 which I bore stoutly and presently said, “O my Sultan,253 what be the cause of this fustigation and wherefor do they oppress me?” Said he, “O man, the conduit254 of the jakes attached to the Mosque was choked by thy slipper and the flow, unable to pass off, brimmed over, whereby sundry houses belonging to the folk were wrecked.”255 I replied, “O my lord, can a slipper estopp the flowing of a water that feedeth a Hammam?” Thereupon the Governor said to me, “Take it away and if any find it in his place and again bring me a complaint thereanent, I will cut off thy head.” So they haled me away after tossing my slipper to me, and I repaired to the Efendi256 of the town and said to him, “O our lord, I have a complaint against this Papoosh which is not my property nor am I its owner: prithee do thou write me a deed to such purport between me and the Slipper and all who pass down this road.” The Efendi replied, “O man, how shall I write thee a deed between thee and thy Papoosh, which is a senseless thing? Nay, take it thyself and cut it up and cast it into some place avoided of the folk.” Accordingly I seized it and hacked it with a hatchet into four pieces which I threw down in the four corners of the city, saying to myself the while, “By Allah, I shall nevermore in my life hear any further of its adventures;” and walked away barefoot. But I had thrown one bit under a bridge that crossed a certain of the small canals; and the season was the dries, wherefore it collected a heap of sand which rose thereupon, and raised the pile higher until the archway was blocked up by a mound. Now when the Níl257 flooded and reached that archway the water was dammed up and ceased running so the townsfolk said, “What may be the matter? The Nile-inundation hath reached the bridge but cannot pass under it. Come let us inspect the archway.” They did so and presently discovered the obstacle; to wit, the mound before the arch which obstructed the waterway; whereupon a party kilted their clothes and waded into the channel that they might clear it. But when they came to the mound-base they found my quarter-slipper, and they exclaimed with one cry, “This be the Papoosh of Abu Kasim the Drummer!” But as soon as the tidings reached me, I fared away, flying from that town, and while so doing was met by a comrade, yonder Bhang-eater; so we agreed that we would travel together and he companied me till we came to this city, e’en as thou seest us, O our lord the Sultan.” Thereupon the King said to them, “Do ye twain abide with me amongst my servants; but I have a condition with you which is that ye be righteous in your service and that ye be ready to join my séance every night after supper-tide.” Then he cautioned them against disobedience and quoth he, “Be ye not deluded by becoming my companions nor say to yourselves, We be the assessors of the King; for that the byword declareth: Whenas the King sitteth beware of his severity, and be not refractory whenever he shall say to thee ‘Do.’” They agreed to this condition and each whispered his mate, “Do thou have a care to act righteously!” Then they left the King nor did they see him again till one day of the days when behold, a Khwajah appeared before the Sultan?And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Four Hundred and Third Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that one day of the days, behold a Khwajah appeared before the Sultan and said, “’Tis not lawful in Allah’s sight, O King of the Age, that a Bhang-eater should propose to dishonour me in the person of my daughter and load me with infamy amongst His worshippers saying the while, “I am of the King’s suite.’” Now the cause of the merchant’s complaint was as follows. One day of the days the Bhang-eater was passing by under the latticed window of the Khwajah’s home when by decree of the Decreer, the daughter of the house was looking out at the casement and was solacing herself by observing all who walked the street. Perchance the Bhang-eater’s glance fell upon the maiden and that sight of eyes entailed a thousand sighs, so he said to himself, “By Allah, if I meet not this maiden, although it be only once, I shall die of a broken heart nor shall any one know of my death.” He then took to passing under the window every day and to gazing upwards and to tarrying there from morning-tide to set of sun; but the more he looked the less he saw of her because Fortune which was fair to him the first time had now turned foul. So he continued in this condition for a while, coming every day to look at the lattice and seeing naught. Presently his case became strait and ill health entered his frame for love to the merchant’s daughter; and by reason of its excess he betook himself to his pillow turning and tossing right and left and crying, “O her eyes! O her loveliness! O her stature! O her symmetrical grace!” But as he was repeating these words behold, an old woman came in to him and, seeing his concern and chagrin, accosted him and said, “No harm to thee!” Quoth he, “Ah, my reverend mother, unless thou come to my aid I perish,” and quoth she, “What is upon thy mind?” So he disclosed to her all he felt of fondnes
s and affection for the Khwajah’s daughter and she rejoined. “Thou wilt never win to thy wish in this matter except through me.” Then she left him and repaired to her own place, pondering the wiles of women, till she entered her house and there she donned a woolen robe and hung three rosaries around her neck, after which she hent a palm-staff in hand and set out for the merchant’s quarters. She ceased not walking till she reached the place and entered in her garb of a religious mendicant258 crying out, “Allah, there is no god but the God! extolled be Allah! Allah be with you all!” When the girl, whose name was Sitt al-Husn?the Lady of Beauty?heard these words she met her, hoping for a blessing, and saying, “O my mother, pray for me!” and the old woman responded, “The name of Allah be upon thee! Allah be thy safeguard!”259 Then she sat down and the damsel came and took seat beside her; so likewise did the girl’s mother and both sought a blessing from her and conversed together till about noon when she arose and made the Wuzú-ablution and span out her prayers, whilst those present exclaimed, “By Allah this be a pious woman!” When her orisons were ended they served up dinner to her; but she said, “I’m fasting;” whereat they increased in love and belief herwards and insisted upon her abiding with them until sunset that she might break her fast within their walls. On such wise she acted but it was all a fraud. Then they persisted in keeping her for the night; so she nighted with them, and when it was morn she arose and prayed and mumbled words, some intelligible and others not to be understanded of any, while the household gazed upon her and, whenever she would move from place to place, supported her with their hands under her armpits. At last, when it was mid-forenoon she fared forth from them albeit their intent was not to let her depart. But early on the next day she came in to them and all met her with greetings and friendly reception, kissing her hands and bussing her feet; so she did as she had done on the first day and in like guise on the third while they showed her increased honour and worship. On the fourth day she came to them, as was her wont, and they prayed her be seated; however she refused and said, “I have a daughter whom I am about to marry and the bridal festivities will be in my house; but I come to you at this hour to let you know my desire that Sitt al-Husn may accompany me and be present at my girl’s wedding-feast and thus she will gain a blessing.” Her mother replied, “We dread lest somewhat befal her,” but the ancient woman rejoined, “Fear not for her as the Hallows260 are with her!” Thereupon cried the girl, “There is no help but that I accompany her and be present at her daughter’s wedding ceremony and enjoy the spectacle and take my pleasure.” The mother said, “’Tis well;” and the old trot added, “I will go and return within this moment.” So saying, she went off as one aweary to the house of the Bhang-eater and told him what she had done; then she returned to the maiden whom she found drest and decorated and looking her best. So she took the girl and fared forth with her?And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O sister mine, and enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Four Hundred and Fourth Night,

  Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the ancient woman took the girl and fared forth with her and led her to the Bhang-eater’s house and brought her in to him who, seeing her in all her beauty and loveliness, arose forthright and his wits fled him and he drew near to her of his excessive love herwards. Therewith the “Lady of Beauty” understood that the old woman was an accursed procuress who had beguiled her in order to bring her and the man together. So of her cleverness and clear intelligence she said to her lover, “O my brave, whoso expecteth a visit of his beloved getteth ready somewhat of meat and somewhat of fruit and somewhat of wine, that their pleasure may be perfected; and, if thou purpose love-liesse we will pass the night in this place.” Quoth the Bhang-eater, “By Allah, O my lady, thou speakest sooth but what shall we do at such hour as this?” and quoth she, “Hie thee to the market-street and bring all whereof I spoke.” Said he, “Hearkening and obedience,” and said she, “I will sit down, I and this my mother in this place, the while thou goest and comest.” He rejoined, “A sensible saying!” and forthright he was right gladsome nor knew what was prepared for him in the hidden future. Now as soon as he went the damsel arose and without making aught of noise locked the door closely upon herself and the old trot: then she wandered about the rooms and presently came upon a butcher’s chopper261 which she seized. Hereupon tucking up her sleeves above her elbows, in the firmness of her heart she drew near the old crone until she was hard by her right and so clove her skull asunder that she fell weltering in her blood and her ghost fled her flesh. After this the damsel again went about the house and all worth the taking she took, leaving whatso was unworthy, till she had collected a number of fine robes which the man had brought together after he had become a cup-companion of the Sultan; and, lastly, she packed the whole in a sheet262 and went forth therewith. Now the season was morning but The Veiler veiled her and none met her on the way until she reached her home and went in to her mother whom she found awaiting her and saying, “By Allah, to-day my girl hath tarried long at the bridal festivities of the Ascetic’s daughter.” And behold Sitt al-Husn came in to her carrying a large sheet stuffed with raiment, and as her mother saw her agitated and in disorder she questioned her of her case and of what was packed in the bundle. But the girl, who returned no reply and could not speak one syllable for the emotion caused by the slaughter of the ancient woman, fell to the ground in a fit. Her swoon endured from noon until eventide, her mother sitting at her head the while and sorrowing for her condition. But about set of sun behold, in came her father who found his daughter aswoon; so he questioned his wife who began by recounting to him what they had noted in the old woman of prayer and display of devotion and how she had told them, “I have a daughter whom I am about to marry and the bridal festivities will be in my house.” “And,” pursued the mother, “she invited us to visit her; so at undurntide I sent with her the girl; who at noontide came back bringing somewhat wrapped up and bundled, which be this. But when she entered the house she fell to the floor in a fainting fit and she is even as thou seest; nor do I know what befel her.” Then the father rose up and besprinkled somewhat of water upon her face which revived her and she said, “Where am I?” whereto said he, “Thou art with us.” And when she had recovered and returned to her senses, and her condition was as before the swoon, she told them of the old woman and her ill designs and of her death and lastly how the clothes had been brought by herself from the house of the Bhang-eater. As soon as her sire had heard her words, he set out from his home and sought the Sultan.?And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

  The Four Hundred and Fifth Night,

  Dunyazad said to her “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that whilst the Sultan was sitting behold, the Khwajah came in and complained to him of the Bhang-eater, whereupon he ordered a company to go fetch the accused and they went off and found h
im not. So they returned and reported accordingly. Such was the cause of the Khwajah coming to the King and such was the case with them; but as regards the Bhang-eater, when he went off rejoicing to the Bazar in order to buy whatso the merchant’s daughter had asked him, he brought many a thing wherewith he returned to his lodging. However as he returned he beheld the old woman slaughtered and weltering in her blood and he found nothing at all of the choice articles wherewith his house was fulfilled; so he fell to quoting this couplet:263 ?

  “’Twas as a hive of bees that greatly thrived; * But, when the bee-swarm fled, ’twas clean unhived.”

  And when he beheld that condition of things he turned from his home in haste and without stay or delay left it about the hour of mid-afternoon and fared forth from the city. There he found a caravan bound to some bourne or other, so he proceeded therewith hardly believing in his own safety and he ceased not accompanying the Cafilah264 for the space of five days till it made the city the travellers sought, albeit he was fatigued and footsore from the stress of hardships and weariness he had endured. So he entered the place and wandered about until he found a Khan wherein he hired him a cell by way of nighting-stead and every day he would go forth to seek service for wages whereby he might make a livelihood. Now one day of the days a woman met him face to face on the highway and said to him, “Dost thou do service?” and said he, “Indeed I do, O my lady.” She continued, “There is a wall about my place which I desire to level and build another in lieu thereof for that ’tis old and very old.” He replied to her, “’Tis well,” and she took him and repaired with him to her house and showing him the wall in question handed to him a pickaxe and said, “Break it down as much as thou art able be it for two or three days, and heap up the stones in one place and the dried mud in another.” He replied, “Hearkening and obedience;” after which she brought to him somewhat of food and of water and he ate and drank and praised Almighty Allah. After this he rose and began breaking down the wall and he ceased not working and piling up the stones and the dried mud until it was sunset time when the woman paid him to his wage ten faddahs and added a something of food which he took and turned towards his own cell. As soon as it was the second day he repaired to the house of the woman who again gave him somewhat to break his fast and he fell to felling the wall even as he had done on the first day and he worked till noon; but when it was midday and all the household was asleep, lo and behold! he found in the middle of the foundation a crock265 full of gold. So he opened it and considered its contents whereat he was rejoiced and he went forth without leisure or loss of time seeking his own cell and when he reached it he locked himself within for fear lest any look upon him. Then he opened the crock and counted therein one hundred dinars which he pouched in his purse and stowed away in his breast-pocket. Presently he returned, as he was, to break down the rest of the wall and whilst he was trudging along the highway suddenly he sighted a box surrounded by a crowd of whom none knew what might be its contents and its owner was crying out, “For an hundred gold pieces!” Thereupon the Bhang-eater went forwards saying to himself, “Buy thee yonder box for the hundred dinars and thy luck be thy lot, for it there be inside of it aught of wonderful ’tis well, and if otherwise thou shalt stand by thy bad bargain.” So he drew near the broker266 and said to him, “This box for how much?”267 and the other answered, “For an hundred gold dinars!” But when he questioned him as to its contents the man replied, “I know not; whoso taketh it his luck be his lot.” Thereupon he brought out to him the hundred ducats and the broker made over to him the box which he charged upon his shoulders and carried off to his cell. There arrived he bolted himself in and opened the coffer wherein he found a white slave-girl which was a model of beauty and loveliness and stature and perfect grace: but she was like one drunken with wine. So he shook her but she was not aroused when he said to himself, “What may be the story of this handmaiden?” and he was never tired of looking upon her while she was in that condition and he kept saying to himself, “Would Heaven I wot and she be on life or in death; withal I see her breath coming and going.” Now when it was about midnight, the handmaiden revived and looking around and about her, cried, “Where am I?” and said the Bhang-eater, “Thou, O my lady, art in my home;” whereby she understood what had befallen her?And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O sister mine, and enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night, an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was