Stay

by Ivy Kovacs

  - What’s wrong? – I whispered into his ear when the teacher turned to the board and started writing with a marker.

  - Nothing. I just remembered that I haven’t written my essay yet. – He muttered and relaxed his grip.

  I nodded once and opened my book on the given page. Dylan seemed off throughout the entire class. I wondered what he was thinking about. After we walked out of class his uneasiness seemed to vanish and I didn’t want to make him anxious again so I didn’t ask.

  thirty-seven

  The holiday season was always my favorite time of the year. My family held a traditional dinner on Christmas Eve which my mom and I attended annually. We always traveled back for Christmas since it was only the two of us in Florida.

  My mother’s family lived far away and they barely contacted us even when she was alive. They moved to England when my aunt married a British writer. They got married and had three children who are about my age. I barely knew them and only saw them once: at my mother’s funeral. It was no doubt that I’d live with my father’s side of the family, even though my father had nothing to do with me. My mother’s little brother lived near us in Florida but he couldn’t be my legal guardian: he was only a few years older than me and he just got married to his high school sweetheart.

  On the 24th my aunt, my grandma, and I baked together in the kitchen while my uncle introduced Dylan to the other family tradition: gambling. It was only a tradition the men of the family participated in, and since Dylan was part of our family now, my uncle had company on his day off. That meant the house was ours, just us ladies working our butts off to put a full course meal on the dinner table.

  - I think you should wear the satin dress. You know the baby blue one. It would compromise your ivory skin gorgeously. – Nana said while mixing the batter for the cake. They were trying to decide what I should wear for dinner since I really wanted to wear my usual leggings-and-an-oversized-tee combo.

  - Or the light mesh dress I bought for you last year. You haven’t worn it yet. – Rebecca commented.

  - Is it really necessary to dress up? I mean we’re only going to the dining room. – I complained.

  - Absolutely. And don’t forget to pull your hair out of your face. You always hide your beautiful neck and cheeks. – Nana added strictly. She preferred when I wore my hair up because she always said that I shouldn’t hide behind my thick hair.

  - What are you going to wear Lils? – I turned to my cousin who was wiping the silverware with a clean kitchen towel.

  - Probably one of my dresses. – She shrugged.

  - We should make it a tradition for everybody to wear sweats on Christmas. – I proposed and my grandma narrowed her eyes at me.

  - Fine, I’ll choose something nice. – I grumbled and sighed. I liked dressing up for certain occasions, but sitting at home in my own living room with my family didn’t seem like such a special occurrence to me. It happened every week. The exception was that it was Christmas.

  - Alright, we’re done here so while these bake we should get ready. The boys should be home soon. – Rebecca said taking her apron off.

  I showered, shaved, washed my hair, and curled it into loose locks. I debated on which dress I should choose. I laid out the blue satin, the light mesh, a bodycon floral dress, and a black turtle neck with a pleated skirt. I quickly ditched the idea of the bodycon dress. I was going to eat dinner so wearing something tight wasn’t very fitting. I tried on both dresses that my family suggested and chose the blue satin one. It was a very pretty dress: not too baggy, not too tight. The spaghetti straps and the loose neck-line looked good on my body. I did my makeup nicer than usual, putting more effort into it. I’ve watched plenty of tutorials before but I couldn’t quite do it the way they could.

  I heard laughter from downstairs so I guessed everyone was ready. Obviously, I had to choose shoes before I went down, even if we were literally only inside the house. As much as I wanted to wear my white Converse I knew my grandmother would decapitate me if I did, so I chose a pair of baby blue ballerinas that I’ve never worn before because I hated how they looked, but it was better than wearing heels.

  After I checked myself in the mirror and convinced myself that I was adequate to my family’s needs, I walked downstairs. Everyone sat in their seats already, even Seb and Dylan. As soon as I was visible to them, their expressions shifted. Lily smiled a simple smile, my aunt grinned happily that I wore the shoes she'd bought a year ago, my grandma’s eyes glossed under the light as she tried to hold her tears back, my uncle gulped (not sure if that was a good or a bad thing) and then there was Dylan… His ocean eyes were wide with marvel and locked on me, his jaw dropped but he forced his mouth shut before anyone would notice. – You’re so beautiful. – He whispered almost inaudibly but I heard it and blushed. Who knew that if I’d dress up nicely and put some makeup on I could bring this reaction out of people?

  - I’m sorry if I’m late. – I apologized as I walked towards the dining table and took my seat beside Dylan. Grandma and Sebastian sat on the heads of the table, while Rebecca and Lily sat across us.

  - You came just in time, Gracie. We were just going to say a prayer. – Nana said patting my hand on top of the table. We held each other’s hands on the table and closed our eyes. - Dear Lord, as we sit down to this meal together, we give thanks to You and bless Your Name for this food and all of Your blessings toward us, for You are good, Your loving devotion endures forever, and Your faithfulness continues from generation to generation. We thank You for Your favor toward us. We ask that our children and our children’s children will be established before You. Amen. –

  - Amen. – We added after her and dug in.

  - You look really beautiful, Grace. – Seb commented when we were halfway through the meal.

  - Thanks, Seb. – I said gratefully.

  - You look exactly like your mother. – Nana smiled with tears in her eyes. I fought to keep mine in and blinked the tears away. – Sorry... I just miss her. – She added wiping a tear from the corner of her eye.

  - We all miss her. – Rebecca held nana’s hand on the table with a soft smile.

  - She’s here with us. Like she always is. – I added.

  After dinner, we watched a Christmas movie together on the big TV in the living room and headed to bed.

  - Are you sure you have nowhere to be? I wouldn’t want to hold you back if you have plans. – I said from my bathroom while taking my makeup off.

  - I’m sure. I mean I don’t want to bother... – Dylan responded as he lay on my bed.

  - You don’t bother us, Dylan. You belong to this family. – I responded and glanced at him for a second then turned back to the mirror. – I meant that if you would rather be with your family... or friends. I would understand. –

  - I wouldn’t. – He shook his head. – If I weren’t here I’d probably be drunk in Max’s apartment with Oliver or something. –

  I sighed.

  - You know you looked incredibly breathtaking tonight. – He turned to his side and watched me get ready for bed.

  - Nana and Rebecca insisted that I’d wear something fitting for the event. Though I’d much rather worn an oversized shirt and leggings. – I admitted the thoughts that’d crossed my mind all day.

  - You would’ve looked just as beautiful. –

  - You can stop complimenting me now. I’m back to my average, natural, boring self. – I smiled and got on top of him.

  - You were never boring. – He disagreed looking into my eyes and brushed my hair behind my ears.

  - True. I’m famous around hospitals. – I joked humorlessly.

  - You are a magnet for jeopardy. – He agreed with a half-grin.

  - I am, considering the fact that I chose to date the baddest of bad guys. –

  - I am honored to hold that title. – He smirked and pulled me closer to his lips. They touched with delicate intimacy before the hunger took over and our lips worked greedily.

  - Do you think you w
ould’ve dated me if you didn’t know about my past? – I asked, lying on his bare chest. His arm was wrapped around me, playing with the locks of my hair.

  - Probably. – He answered. – I already liked you when we were eating lunch after school and I hadn’t known about it back then. –

  - But you would’ve hesitated for longer. – I said tracing patterns along his warm skin. – You would’ve considered it from a different aspect. –

  - I would’ve done it sooner or later. I knew you were special. – He added softly. – Why the sudden query? –

  I turned to my stomach, facing him but our bodies still touched under the blanket. – I’m curious what made you fall for me. –

  He chuckled a short chuckle and rubbed my shoulder gently. – I honestly don’t know. –

  I narrowed my eyes and slightly pursed my lips. – You weren’t like the girls I’ve been with before. I was able to open up to you and curious if you’d open up to me. When you did, I knew that you considered me special too. You showed me your vulnerable side and I wasn’t afraid to show mine to you. –

  - I was surprised you opened up to me after a week. – I admitted with a soft smile.

  - I was too. – He added. – I felt comfortable around you. You weren’t with me because I was handsome or because you knew I was easy to seduce. You really wanted to get to know me and spend quality time together. –

  - Well, I guess that’s why quality time is my love language. – I giggled and his fingers lingered on my back. – And physical touch... – I whispered and my heart already started beating faster.

  He laughed and kissed my forehead, pulling me back against his chest where I’d laid before, and held me tightly in his arms. I stared into the darkness for some time, thinking about what he said. He really fell for me because of who I was and not because he felt like he had to after he realized how broken I was. As I listened to his heartbeats, I fell asleep.

  I was dreaming about Florida. It all seemed veritable: an average day back in Boca Raton. I was lying on the beach, early in the morning, watching the sunrise above the ocean. Dylan was strolling out of the water, his perfect body glistened as the sun shined on the water droplets. His wet curls dripped on me as he reached me, lying next to me on the white sand. His eye color matched the ocean precisely.

  His cold hand reached to caress my cheek and I smiled up at him. – Good morning. – His low voice greeted me. It felt very real.

  I opened my eyes slightly and saw the same image. Dylan above me, leaving small morning kisses on my cheek and neck. He was a lot warmer now so I quickly realized that our trip to the beach was only a dream. I sighed, letting a lungful of air escape through my nose.

  - What’s wrong? – He muttered between the soft kisses he left on my skin.

  - It was just a dream. – I whispered.

  - Tell me about it. –

  - We were on the beach in Florida. You were coming out of the water and I was watching you from the shore. – I described my dream to him.

  - Sounds nice. – He kept giving me small pecks. – We should visit your hometown once. It would be a fun road trip. –

  - Really? –

  - Yeah, why not? –

  - Okay. – I nodded slightly and kissed my lips deeply.

  - We should go downstairs. Your family is probably waiting for us. – He spoke against my lips and I tried to escape the ecstatic feeling he left me with.

  - Okay. – I whispered very quietly. He pulled away, sitting up on the edge of the bed. – I don’t want to get up. – I moaned.

  - Don’t you want to see what I got you for Christmas? – He grinned, putting his jeans on.

  - No, but I want to give you mine. – I grinned too and got up. I was only wearing one of his shirts to sleep.

  - You look really hot in my shirt. – He licked his bottom lip and I blushed.

  I grabbed a pair of leggings and a Christmas themed t-shirt and walked downstairs hand in hand with Dylan. Under the giant Christmas tree, there were a bunch of bigger and smaller gift boxes. My aunt really went out on these holidays.

  - Merry Christmas! – Nana hugged me tightly and kissed my cheek.

  - Merry Christmas, nana. – I smiled softly. She hugged Dylan too before we sat down on the big white couch.

  - Alright, Lily you’re up first. Youngest to oldest. – Seb said sitting in the armchair. Rebecca sat down on the arm of the chair and Seb wrapped his arm around her as they watched Lily search for the boxes that had her name on them. Her eager hands ripped the wrapping paper easily, revealing her gifts one by one. She got a lot of stuff for her horse-riding lessons, a new Converse, and a few dresses. She was a very grateful child.

  - Grace. – I was younger than Dylan so it was my turn to hunt the gifts under the tree. I sat down on the floor and opened the first box that had my name on it. Unlike Lily, I carefully opened the present, not tearing the wrapping paper apart. It was a canvas, paint, and brushes.

  - I thought you could paint something again. – Nana smiled brightly. She adored my art, though I was really not that good. I just preferred handmade gifts since I had no money to buy something big for my family.

  - Thanks, nana. – I smiled gratefully and opened the next box. It was a new Macbook.

  - We thought it’d nice to have a new laptop when you go to college. – Sebastian commented.

  - Wow...that’s uh. Very generous. Thanks, guys. –

  There was a box full of new clothes that my aunt bought me, hoping I’d wear those instead of my usual oversized shirts.

  Then there was a small box, wrapped poorly. I guessed it was from Dylan. Inside the small box, there was a bracelet: a small charm that was shaped like a sunflower. The center of it was a dark crystal.

  - Look inside it. – He said, smiling impatiently. I looked confused. Inside where? I pulled the charm closer to my eye and inside the bracelet, there was a picture of us that Debby took one afternoon. The dark crystal wasn’t a crystal, it was a projection glass.

  - Dylan... – I moaned in a sweet voice. My eyes got glossy.

  - Do you like it? –

  - I love it! – I walked closer to give him a small peck on his cheek. – Can you help me put it on? – I asked sitting down and he wrapped the bracelet around my wrist, hooking it into place. – It’s so pretty. – I smiled brightly.

  - What did you get? – Lily asked curiously.

  - It’s a bracelet, but it has a picture of us inside it. – I responded, showing off my bracelet to them.

  - It’s beautiful. – Rebecca smiled.

  - It’s your turn. – I tugged on his arm lightly.

  He opened nana’s gift first. She got him a picture frame that had the map and the coordinates of his hometown.

  - I thought you would like to hang it above your bed or something. – Nana smiled at him.

  - This is amazing, Mrs. Smith. Thank you. – He really appreciated it.

  Next was from me. He opened the new AirPods from the box and widened his eyes.

  - Check it out. – I added and he opened the box. I custom painted the case of the AirPods for him. It was the scenery of the lake we’ve been to when we got together.

  - Did you paint this? – His forehead creased with curiosity and I nodded. – That’s where we went fishing in October. – He realized what it symbolized and flashed me a bright smile. – Wow that’s so cool. Thank you! –

  He opened my godparents’ present last. They bought him a new sound system for his car and he was very enthusiastic to try it.

  Next, we gave our gifts to Nana, Seb and Rebecca. Nana got a pair of sunglasses that she loved but were too expensive, Sebastian got a few workout gears for his home gym he was in the middle of building, and Rebecca got a new designer bag and jewelry.

  After the gift opening, we ate breakfast and went back up into our room.

  - You’re really talented. I never thought you could paint this good. – He said still surprised.

  - They say I got it from my
dad. – I shrugged and his jaw clenched. – Is something wrong? – I raised an eyebrow toward him.

  - No... I just don’t like it when you mention him. He’s even worse than my mom. – He mumbled.

  - I don’t care about him, Dylan. You shouldn’t either. – I wrapped my arms around his neck but he didn’t look at me. – I really like the bracelet. – I said trying to change subjects.

  - I’m glad. – He murmured.

  - Come on! Don’t let my stupid excuse of a father ruin this lovely day for us. – I nagged him and he sighed.

  - Fine. What are we gonna do today? – He asked looking at me now.

  - Probably cuddle. Or we could play board games with them downstairs. I’m warning you... I’m an excellent Monopoly player. – I smirked.

  - Challenge accepted, Smith. – He grinned and kissed me.

  We spent the day at home with my family, but the next day we decided to grab some unhealthy fast-food and surprise Oliver who was at Max’s place alone.

  - Ho ho ho. – I entered the apartment and saw Oliver’s naked bum in the hallway.

  - Jesus! – I yelled covering my eyes.

  - You could’ve told me you were coming! – He growled.

  - Bro... put something on. – Dylan placed his hands over mine for extra protection.

  - I’m sure she saw something like this before. –

  - Yeah, me. She doesn’t have to see your white asscheeks. – I could tell Dylan was rolling his eyes.

  - They were pretty white. – I admitted. The image burned into my brain.

  - Well, you’re welcome for seeing a good-looking naked man. – Oliver added.

  - Shut up. – Dylan exhaled and took his hands off my eyes. Oliver was in his boxers now.

  - We got you some food. – I said showing him the bags in my hand. His eyes widened and he jumped up from the couch.

  - That smells amazing. – He moaned opening the bag and stuffed his mouth with a few french fries. I chuckled and Dylan rolled his eyes.

  - You know, just because you’re alone here doesn’t mean you can’t cook for yourself. – Dylan commented and took his coat off.