by Erin Osborne
“I’ve recently become a widow and my husband was someone my parents knew. He decided he wanted me and took what he wanted. I lost my virginity to him raping me in my parent’s house and they did nothing but laugh when he told them about it. I overheard them talking and they all laughed. That one time he raped me, I got pregnant with my twins. I tried to run and hide from him, but he always managed to find me. When he found out I was pregnant, he beat me to the point I thought I was losing my babies. This went on my entire pregnancy because he didn’t want kids. They would take my attention from him.
“Anyway, I was beaten almost daily by him. Raped repeatedly by him and whoever else he allowed to have sex with me. I’ve never been with a man willingly at this point in my life. What made me realize I had to get out and couldn’t look back was the day he tried to hurt my children because they accidently spilled milk at dinner. The only meat they were allowed to eat in the house because he usually wasn’t home. Yes, he was trying to starve my babies, but I always made sure they had food when he wasn’t looking.
“I stayed because I didn’t have money of my own to leave him. There was no one I could turn to for help because I didn’t have any friends. He completely cut me off from the outside world. Not that I had any friends to begin with. Anyway, that’s why I didn’t participate here. I didn’t know who was on his side. Or who I could trust with my story. And yes, I’ve left a few parts out. I’ll get to the point I can share them, but every day is a new day and I get stronger.”
I wipe the tears streaming down my face away and take a deep, shuddering breath. Sitting down, the women all clap their hands for me and begin to share their stories. It’s not something I would have had the courage to do until Grave came into my life. He’s my strength, my backbone when I need it, and the reason I can breathe easy these days.
As I look at the doorway, I see the door softly closing and Grave standing just outside. There’s a look of pride on his face as he offers me a smile before walking away. I was so lost in my head I didn’t even realize he was in the room. Usually I can feel him when he’s near me, but not today.
I’ve been to class after leading the talk session and instead of feeling drained like I normally do after talking about my life, I feel energized. Today, I’ve made a few decisions about my life and I’m going to take charge. Grave will know tonight what I want and what I’m ready for.
I walk in the house with a large pan of meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and peas for dinner. We went with comfort food today in class and I’m ready to dig into it. Grave helps me get the plates ready for us and the kids take their seats to wait for us. They’re all excited as they tell me about their day and how much fun they had with Grave. I love hearing them chatter away a million miles a minute.
“How was your day?” Grave asks me as we sit down.
“It was good. We’ll talk later on,” I tell him, offering a smile.
“Okay. Want you to know I’m proud as hell of you for what you did today,” he says, grabbing my hand and squeezing it gently.
We eat our dinner before heading outside with the kids for a little while. They run off their energy while I sit on the porch with Grave. No words are exchanged as we watch Tyler and Kayla play in the dirt surrounding the house. They’ll definitely need baths tonight with the amount of dirt covering them. I laugh as Tyler gets a headful of dirt when the wind picks up and blows it from the shovel he’s holding.
Before I know it, the kids are in bed and it’s time for Grave and I to head to bed. I head in first and grab what I’m wearing before walking in the bathroom to change. Grave doesn’t get to see what I’m changing into just yet.
As soon as I make sure everything is in place, I open the door and find Grave sitting on the side of the bed in nothing but a pair of shorts. He doesn’t wear underwear, but has been sleeping in shorts so he’s not naked in bed with me. I guess he wanted to make sure I’m comfortable.
When he senses me in the room, Grave turns to face me and his eyes bulge out of his head and his mouth drops open. I’m wearing a black lace teddy and matching G-string. I’ve never attempted anything like this before and I hope he likes it.
“Nessa, you look fuckin’ gorgeous,” he tells me, his voice harsh and low.
“Are you sure?” I ask him, walking further into the room.
“Vanessa, you’re absolutely stunnin’. I’ve never seen someone look as good as you in my fuckin’ life. But, we don’t have to do this. Are you sure you want to take that step with me?” he asks.
“Yes, I am,” I tell him, stripping the straps of the teddy off my shoulders.
Grave watches as it floats to the floor. His eyes never leave my body and it gives me the confidence boost I need. As I walk closer to the bed, he stands up and strips his shorts from his body. When he turns to face me, my heart falters in my chest. Damn, he’s big and thick. I’ve never seen a dick in real life the size of his. But, I tamp the nerves down and climb in bed.
“We’ll take this slow, Nessa. And if I do somethin’ you don’t like, just tell me and I’ll stop. No questions,” he assures me, climbing into bed next to me.
I wind my arms around his neck as he leans in for a kiss. I’m so lost in the kiss and the feelings Grave evokes in me, I don’t feel him strip the thong from my body until I hear him growl as his fingers slide through my wet center. My body arches on its own accord and I want more from the man who’s made me feel things I’ve only dreamed of as a little girl.
Grave slowly breaks the kiss and begins to pepper kisses down my jaw to my neck. I arch my head to give him better access as my hands run down up his back to cradle his head in my hands. I’m getting ready to pull his delectable lips back to mine when he inches his head lower and sucks a nipple into his mouth. Once again my back arches as the sensations shoot straight to my core.
“More, Grave,” I murmur, slamming my mouth shut as I wait for the hit to come.
“It’s me and you, Nessa. I’m not gonna hit you for tellin’ me what you want,” he assures me, kissing down my stomach before latching onto my clit.
At the same time, he slides a finger into my wet pussy. I moan out and can’t stop it from coming as he works my body over. It’s not long before I feel my body coil tight and shatter from his mouth pulling and sucking on my clit while his fingers slide in and out of me.
“Grave!” I yell out, not able to control myself as I fly over the edge.
He doesn’t stop his actions as I gently come back down to Earth.
“The next time you call out my name, I want to hear my real name from your sweet mouth,” he tells me as I feel him line himself up with me. “Call me Christian.”
I nod my head as Grave begins to slide inside me. There’s a slight burn as he continues to stretch me to accommodate his size. Wincing slightly, Grave stops his movements and lets me adjust to him. It only takes a minute before I wrap my legs around his lean hips and dig my heels into his ass.
“More, Christian. I need more,” I pant out.
Grave slides inside me in one fluid move. As soon as he’s buried to the hilt, he pauses again and I hear a groan escape him.
“You feel so good wrapped around me, Nessa.”
Before I can respond, he’s sliding out and back in. Grave starts a punishing pace and it’s like he can’t control himself. I hang on and meet him move for move. I’ve never had the freedom to do anything while having sex, not that I classify what Ray did to me as sex. Shaking my head, I push away the thoughts of a ghost and stay in the moment with Grave.
“Baby, you need to get there. I’m so close,” he grits out.
Grave reaches between our bodies and begins to pinch and rub my clit. Our movements become erratic as a fine sheen of sweet coats our skin. The only sound in the room is our heavy breathing and the slapping of our skin as our bodies meet.
I arch my back and yell out as my orgasm suddenly rips through me.
“Christian!” I call out as I fall apart.
It takes three th
rusts in my body and I barely register Grave stilling inside me.
“Vanessa!” he calls out as I feel his cum hit my inner walls.
Oh no! He didn’t wear a condom and I’m not on birth control. I don’t even know if he’s ready for kids. Yeah, he’s told me he wants kids, but that’s it. Never talked about a timeline for that or anything else. I’m not sure what to do as I begin to panic.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he says gently as he slides from my body. “What’s goin’ on?”
“You didn’t use a condom and I’m not on birth control,” I murmur.
Grave doesn’t say a word as he looks down and just now realizes he’s not wearing a condom. He doesn’t look worried or panicked as his eyes meet mine.
“I’m sorry honey. I’m clean. I got tested right after you got here and I haven’t been with anyone since seein’ you. If you’re worried about kids, I told you I want as many as you’ll give me. If that means we start now, then that’s what it means,” he tells me, climbing off the bed.
I watch him walk into the bathroom and hear the water turn on. After a few minutes, Grave walks back in the room with a washcloth in his hands. He cleans me up, tosses the washcloth in the laundry basket and climbs into bed with me. Grave pulls the blankets up over us and pulls me into his arms. I fall asleep before we can talk about anything else. Today was a long day.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Grave
LAST NIGHT WAS the best day. Not only did Vanessa get up and share more of her story than I’ve ever heard, but she gave me the best gift I’ve ever received up to this point in my life. Vanessa gave me her body and it was the best thing I’ve ever felt or experienced.
Cassidy called me right after Vanessa talked to her about running a group therapy session. I wasn’t sure she was going to talk herself, but I went in the hopes I’d get to see her in action. Everyone knows Vanessa doesn’t share her story, including the other women at the compound. To hear her words and see the torment etched on her face killed me, but it was something she had to do. Vanessa had to prove to herself she was strong enough to talk about her life and not get judged in return. Those women proved she could talk about it and not live in the fear of someone talking about her behind her back.
When she got home, I didn’t expect much from her. She had a hard day talking about everything she went through and I expected her to fall into bed shortly after putting the kids to bed. So, when she walked into the room, wearing nothing more than a see-through teddy, I was shocked. But, as I told her, I’ve never seen anyone look better than her in that moment. Or any moment when I get to lay eyes on her.
Vanessa gave me herself and there was only one time I saw fear in her eyes. It was after the first time she told me she needed more. This lead me to believe she was never allowed to do anything when she was raped or had sex in her life. I’m not so sure she’s ever willingly been with a man she actually wanted to be with.
Then, when she realized I didn’t wear a condom, there was another little freak out moment for her. Honestly, I wasn’t even thinking about wearing one with her because I’ve wanted her for so long and it felt like I was in a dream. But, I meant it when I told her I want her to carry my babies and I’ll take as many as I can get with her. That hasn’t changed for me and I don’t want to wait if she doesn’t want to. Because I can’t imagine being with Vanessa and wearing a condom after feeling her bare, feeling every ripple, shudder, and tremor of her body all because of me and what I’m making her feel.
It’s a powerful feeling to know Vanessa will fall apart in my arms. To see her shatter and lose herself in the power of her release. I’ve never witnessed anything like it with any other woman I’ve been with. And, yes, I’ve been with more than my fair share of women in the past. I enjoy women of every type. But, there’s something about knowing I’ll always come home to Vanessa and I don’t need anyone other than her that makes me feel like a fucking king.
Tonight is a different story. I want to take Vanessa and the kids out to celebrate. We have a lot to celebrate after the last few weeks. First is Vanessa doing what she has to in order to free herself from the chains that have held her back for so long. Then there’s starting the sessions for the women at the compound to talk and share without having a counsellor in the room. Finally, it’s the fact that we’re a family. The kids and Vanessa may not share my last name just yet, but we’re living together and growing as a family on a daily basis.
I’m not sure if Vanessa is ready to venture out just yet, but we’re gonna try it and see what happens. It’s not like she has to worry about the asshole trying to get to the kids and her from some random place or the store when she’s out. So, I’ve found a good place to take the kids where there’s food for them and games to play afterwards. Psycho and Hadliegh have taken the kids there more than once and they seem to have fun. The same with Callie and Bear.
“Vanessa, where are you?” I ask, walking in the house after going to the garage for a while today.
“In the kitchen,” she answers.
I hope she’s not making dinner already. Hopefully, I can catch her before she starts anything as I rush toward her.
When I come to the kitchen, I see her on her hands and knees. She’s cleaning the floor and I wonder what the hell happened that she feels she has to scrub it the way she is.
“Somethin’ happen in here?” I ask her, leaning against the counter.
“No. I wanted to clean the floor and there’s a spot here I can’t get out,” she tells me, looking up and brushing the hair from her face.
“I don’t see anythin’ babe,” I assure her. “You didn’t start dinner yet?”
“No. I was going to as soon as I was done in here,” she tells me, standing up and placing the dirty cloth in the bucket. “Anything specific you want?”
“Nope. I thought we’d take the kids out to eat tonight. It’s time we go out and do somethin’ as a family, Vanessa,” I tell her.
Vanessa looks at me for a minute and I watch as a small smile appears on her face. There’s no fear or hesitation like I would’ve seen just a few weeks ago. Instead she appears to be figuring out where we can take them.
“Psycho and Bear told me about a place they take the kids. It’s not too far from here and there’s games we can play with Tyler and Kayla after we’re done eating. Sound good?” I ask her.
“Yeah, actually that does. Let me wash up and make sure they’re ready to go,” she says.
“You go get cleaned up. I got the kids,” I respond, following her upstairs after getting a kiss from her.
Kayla and Tyler are in her room playing with a few toys. They look up as I enter the room and I can tell they won’t need to change clothes as I look them over. The kids get up and run over to me as I bend down for my daily hugs. Nothing beats them wrapping their arms around me and telling me they missed me while I was gone. Well, I get the same feeling when Vanessa greets me too.
Leading them downstairs, I help them get their shoes on while we wait on Vanessa to finish up. We’re sitting in the living room waiting when I see her round the corner from the stairs. Vanessa’s wearing a pair of faded blue jeans that hug her hips and mold to her delectable ass. She’s got a black tank top on that fits like a second skin and I’m ready to take her up to bed and forget going out to eat.
“You ready to go?” I ask her to distract myself.
“Yep,” she answers, grabbing her purse off the stand she usually keeps it on as the kids and I meet her by the door.
After locking up the house for Vanessa’s piece of mind, we make our way to the SUV I bought us. Tyler and Kayla get in their seats as we climb in the front. Once I’m away from the clubhouse, I head in the direction of the outskirts of town. It only takes less than a half hour for us to get to the restaurant and I can see the parking lot is filling up. I’m glad we’re getting here now so we don’t have to wait.
Getting the kids out of the SUV, we head into the kid-friendly restaurant. I’m not exactly sure wh
at I’m getting myself into, but when I see the kids’ faces light up at the noise and sounds coming from the place, I’ll take it. Tyler and Kayla haven’t had the opportunity to go places like this and you can see it. They take in everything as their gaze falls on everything they can see in the span of a few seconds.
“Look!” Tyler calls out and points to the large ball pit with an attached slide to it.
There’s a jungle-gym-looking thing with a lot of windows and nets to hold the kids inside. Slides line the ends of the contraption and then there’s the ball pit with its own slide. The back wall is lined with different games to accommodate kids of all ages. The rest of the room holds tables for family’s to eat at and wait as the older children have fun playing. Then there’s more games and a counter to turn in tickets that are won off to the left. It’s chaotic and flashing lights off every color I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Are you sure you want to eat here?” Vanessa asks me as a waitress comes over to seat us.
“Yep. Look at them,” I answer, nodding my head to the kids as they talk to one another excitedly.
“I know. I wish this wasn’t their first time somewhere like this,” she tells me.
“It’s not your fault. It’s their sperm donor’s, and you did the best you could,” I assure her.
The waitress leads us to a booth in the back. I climb in after Tyler while Vanessa slides in after Kayla. We pick up the menus and order our drinks while figuring out what to have to eat.
“I want nuggets,” Kayla tells her mom as she tries to read the menu.
“Okay honey,” Vanessa answers. “What about you Tyler?”