Forever My Love (An Ireland Forever Short Story)

by Fiona Starr

  He’s so focused on what he’s doing I’m afraid to interrupt him. I don’t know what to do. I try to time myself so I can speak when he’s not swinging. I open my mouth to say hello when the gate slams shut behind me.

  GERARD

  A noise near the hedge interrupts me mid-swing. I turn toward the sound and nearly drop the axe, jumping back so I don’t accidentally kill the woman who has appeared out of nowhere.

  “Jesus! You startled me.” I’m breathing heavy. I look around and the piles of wood strewn about tell me I’ve lost track of time and timber.

  She’s staring at me, her mouth hanging open. “Sorry. I didn’t mean…”

  She’s American. I blink the sweat from my eyes, grab my shirt, and wipe my face and chest. “You shouldn’t sneak around people swinging axes, you know. What are you doing here?”

  She has dark blue eyes and dark brown hair cut chin length. She’s holding a bunch of flowers from the hedge in her hands. She points up toward the castle. “I saw these flowers growing from my window and it seemed so odd for March, I… I wanted to take a look.” She points at the gate behind her, hesitating. “I’m interrupting you. I should go…” She turns to leave.

  Something about her is so earnest, so real, I don’t want her to go anywhere. I step toward her and hurry to speak. “Are… Are you with the party then?”

  She turns back toward me and shakes her head. Her hair brushes forward and covers her cheek. She looks at me from behind the dark curtain of her hair and something in her eyes makes my heart race.

  “My friend is. Lacy. I’m kind of crashing in her room for a few days. Clear my head.”

  I nod, not knowing what else to say. I tip my chin at the flowers. “That’s quince.”

  “Quince?” She arches her brows, confused.

  “The flowers. They’re called quince. The hedge is flowering quince.” I realize I’m wringing my shirt into a ball.

  She looks down at her hands as if she’s forgotten she’s holding the flowers. “Oh. I picked them. I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.” She cringes. “I feel like I shouldn’t be here.”

  I take another step toward her and we’re face to face and I’m suddenly aware of the fact that I am sweating like a sinner in church. “Please. I’ve been terribly rude. I’m Gerry.” I offer her my hand.

  She takes it and looks up at me, the flat gray light of the sky lighting her face. “Madeline.”

  “Nice to meet you, Madeline.” I take one look in her eyes and I know I’m in trouble.

  MADELINE

  He’s still holding my hand. And I his. Our eyes are locked together and I feel like I am dreaming. If I am, I don’t think I want to wake up. His hands are rough and his voice is deep and he smells like wood and sweat and fresh air. I inhale his scent and let it fill my head. Then I shake some reality back into my mind. I am no position to deal with a man.

  Gerry points into the garden. “There’s path this way that will get you back to the house. No sense walking through the woods again.”

  When he lets go of my hand, it’s like everything goes cold. He turns and steps away, his back to me. “Come. I’ll show you the way.”

  I nod. “Thank you.” I take a step toward him and stumble on loose a piece of wood.

  “Oh!” He’s there in a flash, arms catching me, holding me close.

  I’m leaning awkwardly and I clutch his body in reflex at first. But when it’s clear he’s got me, my hands relax and I feel the warmth of his chest with one hand and the ridge of his spine with the other. His skin glistens.

  He lifts me up, cradling me, and turns around, placing me on my feet on the other side of the wood pile. I stand up and he straightens.

  My hands are still on his chest. His heartbeat thrumming under my touch. “Thank y—”

  His eyes never leave mine. “Dear lord,” he whispers. He leans down and hesitates a moment, his mouth inches from mine. His eyes are radiant blue, like the Colorado sky the morning after a snow storm.

  I don’t know what comes over me.

  I lift my chin and touch my lips to his and then we’re kissing.

  I can’t stop touching him. His body is so warm and his skin is hot and so soft compared to the roughness of his strong hands. His lips move with mine and then down over my chin and to the tender skin of my neck. The stubble on his face tickles and raises gooseflesh all over my body and making me shiver.

  He pulls away. “Are ye cold?”

  I’m panting when I look at him and shake my head. “I’m fine.”

  He touches his tongue to the corner of his mouth and I can’t resist. I move into him and follow his tongue with mine and then he kneels down and we’re in the grass.

  GERARD

  The back of her hair is damp and she smells of soap and flowers. I kneel down on the grass and she moves with me. She lays alongside me and moves her hand over my chest and down to my waist.

  I slip a hand under her sweater and let it glide along the warm smoothness of her back. I can feel her muscles moving as she writhes up against me and it arouses me that she’s fit and toned. I move my hand along the back of her bra and fail to find the clasp.

  She lifts her sweater over her head and tosses it aside and my hands move between her breasts to undo her bra. Her breasts are small and firm, and I take one into my mouth, flicking at her nipple.

  She moans and her hands are at my waist, feeling around, scrabbling for a way in, trying to undo my kilt. Then it’s as if she realizes I’m wearing a skirt and she slides her hands down. My cock is hard and ready. She moves her hands over the fabric and wraps her hands around my erection.

  I’m kissing her neck when I realize she’s stopped moving.

  She lifts her hands off me and sits up, her face a jumble of confusion.

  “What is it?” I ask. “What’s wrong?”

  “I…” She clasps her bra and grabs her sweater, pushing her arms through her sleeves and pulling it over her head. “I can’t do this. I’m sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking when I agreed to this.”

  “Agreed? To what?” Ice runs through me as her words filter from my ears to my brain. She agreed to this? Is this a setup? By whom? For what purpose? Then it dawns on me and I bark a laugh. Of course…

  She’s flustered and blushing and really laying it on thick. “I shouldn’t be here. Forgive me, Gerry. I am so sorry.”

  “Hey, it’s no problem.” I help her to her feet. “No harm done. Nothing wrong with a roll in the grass, eh?”

  She looks at me as if I’ve slapped her. There’s steel in her eyes. “This isn’t me. I don’t just roll in the grass.”

  I put my hands up in surrender and lead her to the walking path that will bring her back to the main house. “Sorry. No offense meant.” I open the gate and step aside. As she steps through, I can’t help myself. “Tell Allen nice try. But my eyes are open.”

  She looks at me as if trying to feign ignorance, but I see it all with perfect clarity. I watch her go and try to ignore the little squeeze in my chest. Even if this was a setup… there’s something special about this girl.

  MADELINE

  Who the hell is Allen? I’m back in the hotel room and pacing the floor, trying to unpack what just happened. Gerry is hotter than hell and lord knows I would love nothing better than to be fucked senseless by a hot random gardener while hiding out in Ireland, but nothing good could possibly come from this.

  I am not here for a fling. I am here to reclaim myself, get centered, and put my life back on the rails. I can’t afford to get tangled up with someone new. Besides, I have been wrong every time I’ve picked a man. I thought I had broken my streak of losers when I found Peter two years ago, but turns out he was a next-level douche; a professional—he let me think I found him, when he targeted me and was playing the long game.

  Thank God I found out about Peter in time. But discovering his duplicity doesn’t erase my previous years of bad choices. I can’t trust myself to choose wisely. And right now, I can’t
trust myself to choose anything at all.

  I move to the bedroom and stare at myself in the mirror. “What in the world was that, Maddie? Are you so desperate that you’re willing to throw yourself at the first hot man you meet?” To be fair, he wasn’t just the first hot man I met, he’s probably the hottest man I’ve ever met… and what am I desperate for? It’s not sex; for all of Peter’s double-dealing, things were fine in the bedroom. “So what is it? What happened out there that made this draw you in?” I search my face for answers and find nothing. Then I realize I’ve got my sweater on backward and inside out. I was in such a hurry I didn’t even think about my sweater. I retrace my path back to the room and realize I’ve passed no fewer than a dozen people on my way back here. “Oh, you’re a prize, Madeline Blaze. Classy dame.”

  I run my hands through my hair and try to shake off this frustration. I need to restart, reboot this trip. I head to the bathroom and turn on the shower.

  I’m just getting out of the shower when my phone buzzes with a text from Lacy.

  On my way. ETA 30.

  Dinner and drinks with my bestie is the perfect way to reset and start my trip over. I can erase my afternoon in the garden. There is no hot Irishman named Gerry who chops wood in a kilt. It never happened. I tap my reply to Lacy and toss the phone on the bed.

  Perfect. See you soon!

  GERARD

  I watch Maddie walk away. In all my years, I’ve never had an experience quite like that; our connection was so real, the chemistry so instant. I’m surprised at myself, allowing an absolute stranger to catch me in her web. I should know better than to fall so recklessly.

  The little cluster of quince blooms sits on the ground by the wood pile. I pick it up and bring them to my nose, letting their sweet scent bring Madeline back to my mind.

  Her skin was so soft and she smelled like summer. How in the world had Allen managed this? How did he find her?

  Thinking of Allen snaps me back to reality. I can’t dwell on this. Connection or no, I got the message loud and clear.

  I pull on my shirt, which is crumpled and in need of a good cleaning, and head through the garden gate to my car. I open the driver’s door, grab my phone, and dial Allen. His secretary picks up and patches me through right away.

  I’ve been so busy sulking and feeling sorry for myself that I haven’t noticed it’s time to move on from the Viper. I don’t need a new relationship, but the message is banging on my head like a drum. I’m done wearing this ball and chain around my heart. I am done living in reaction to whatever my ex decides to send my way. I am done.

  “Have you decided already? That was fast.”

  “Offer her five million.”

  “Five? You sure?”

  “Tell her if she agrees and signs, we walk away and never contact each other again.”

  “And if she refuses?”

  “If she fights for more or refuses, tell her that I will leak the pictures myself. She’s been holding this over me for a year. I no longer care if the world sees my cock.”

  Allen laughs. “You sure you’d make good on that? Your mother would have a canary.”

  “I’m done being threatened, Allen.”

  “Good for you, man. And if she calls your bluff?”

  “Tell her not only will I release the pictures, but I will make it my personal mission to reach out to her new boyfriend any man she sets her sights on. I am sure all her future men will be of a certain financial class, and they’d love to know about her schemes—in detail.”

  Allen whistles through the phone. “Whatever’s brought the fight back to you, keep it up.”

  I smile and shake my head. “Speaking of which, good choice on the bait you dangled. How did you find her so quick?”

  Allen pauses for a moment. “What are you talking about?”

  “Oh please, she’s the opposite of that viper in very way. You couldn’t have chosen better.”

  He laughs. “I have done nothing and you’re deeply disturbed to be this paranoid. Perhaps you need to eat something, get your blood sugar up?”

  I ignore his deflection. It doesn’t really matter. “Whatever you say, Wise One. Point taken. Make the offer.”

  “Her solicitor will have it before close of business today.”

  MADELINE

  On the walk to the village, Lacy catches me up on all the festivities going on around the Blackthorn tour kickoff. It’s an overwhelming itinerary of events. They’ve had media lunches, tea parties, dance parties, intimate acoustic mini concerts, dinners, and sightseeing tours. She’s been here three days and from the sound of it, couldn’t have had a moment of sleep.

  Mackey’s Public House sits on the edge of the village at the base of the small mountain I’d seen from the hotel room. Everything about it feels airy, charming, and warm. The long wooden bar is full of people and there’s an air of neighborly friendship about the place as friends laugh and talk across the room.

  After the brisk walk from the castle, Lacy and I shake off the chill and grab one of the open tables in the center of the room. After a moment, the bartender comes out from behind the bar and hands us menus.

  “Welcome to Mackey’s. Can I get you a drink?”

  I smile. “I’ll have a pint of Guinness, please.”

  Lacy orders a white wine spritzer and laughs at herself. “I can’t help it. They were serving them at the party this afternoon and I’m hooked!”

  I inspect her face and there’s isn’t a dark circle to be seen. She looks happy and excited, and maybe even a little… satisfied?

  I lower my menu. “So… you left out one very specific detail about today…?”

  Lacy leans in and squeals a little bit. “Me? Leave something out?”

  “Come on… did you meet him? No holding out. Spill it!”

  She looks around us to make sure nobody can hear. The tables are really close together. “Oh. My. God!” she whispers. “Ok, all band was sitting with a local radio crew doing an interview, and when they were done, each of the band guys had to record one-on-one promo spots for the station. Janie arranged for Sean to go first and then slip out of the meeting and into the green room with me! She said that he wanted to meet me.”

  “And… what happened?”

  “Nothing!” She’s positively glowing. “Maddie, I can’t explain it. He’s so different from what you’d expect. I mean, he has this whole rocker persona going on, right? But that’s for show, for the band… for their fans. It’s what people want. But the real Sean is quiet and shy, and he’s thoughtful and so sweet. We met in the green room and he brought us coffees and we sat and just talked.”

  “Aw, you’re blushing,” I croon.

  “I’m kind of blown away. There’s too much going on tonight, we’re going to go late again, but he said he wants to spend time with me, like real time. We’re going to meet for breakfast in the morning, before the schedule starts.”

  “Wow.” I am genuinely surprised. “I wasn’t expecting this.”

  “Right? Me neither. I have fantasized about meeting him and having like a serious grope session or a quickie or something… but he is nothing like that—couldn’t be more different. He’s sweet and genuinely charming, and not into the whole groupie scene. Janie’s never hinted at how down-to-earth he really is. Come to think of it, I am going to have a word with her about that because I could have totally ruined this if I had gone in with guns blazing, you know?”

  We laugh at the vision of her scaring Sean Black away. The bar tender delivers our drinks and takes our order. I’m starving and for the first time in recent memory I feel relaxed and happy.

  By the time our food arrives, the pub has become more crowded. People stand two-deep at the bar, and all the tables are full. The booth by the window is bursting with a group of friends who all squeeze in. I take in the room again and smile. It’s kind of like the bar back home in Blaze during the off season. Mostly locals, and everyone is just hanging out, catching up, and moving from table to table to
check in with friends.

  “All right, I’ve caught you up on every second of my trip. Your turn.” Lacy places her arm on mine, her voice serious. “How are you doing? Are you glad you came?”

  I nod. “I really needed this. It’s going to be a great weekend.”

  A man appears at our the table and touches the empty chair next to me. “Are ye using this?” He’s got dark eyes and a scruff of wild beard sprinkled with brown and red.

  I can’t help but smile at the musical sound of his words. Even the simplest conversation seems overly quaint and charming; utterly distracting. “No, please, it’s yours.”

  “Brilliant, thanks!” He turns the chair around right where it is and joins the group crowded around the table next to us.

  Lacy finishes her drink and waves to the bartender to bring another round. “What did you do this afternoon?”

  I don’t answer right way. I finish my beer and lick the foam from my lips. What am I supposed to say? But something on my face betrays me.

  Lacy isn’t fooled. She glares at me with laser focus. “Madeline Ophelia Blaze… what have you been up to?”

  I feel the flush rise up my neck as my face gets hot.

  She laughs. “Tell me everything.”

  GERARD

  I turn the shower on as hot as it will go and step inside.

  It feels great to have made the decision to fight back. My ex—that woman whose name I shall not utter—she’s been a blight on my soul. I haven’t seen it this clearly until today. Until just now. Something about my encounter with Madeline has broken through a wall in my head and made me realize just how heavy a burden this whole thing has been. I’ve been free to do whatever I like with dating and such since the snake left me, but I never really felt free.