Falling Under

by Gwen Hayes

“At least he isn’t a cross-dresser.” She clapped her hand over her mouth, ashamed and embarrassed that she’d let that slip out.

  He shook his head ruefully. He started to speak, then stopped twice before he finally said, “You have a natural talent, Amelia. And your life is just going to get stranger as it grows. Guys like that won’t be able to keep up with you.”

  Donny sent me another wary glance. “So, guys . . . how about that demon summoning? Ready to get started?”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  Haden watched the snow fall outside his window, knowing the weather portended his mother’s state of mind. He wasn’t looking forward to whatever came next, as icicles fell like daggers alongside the snowflakes.

  At least she’d locked him in his own room this time, rather than the dungeon. And thankfully, Theia had gotten away somehow.

  He missed her. He would always miss her. The gaping crater his heart once claimed would forever feel her absence. Something stirred inside him. A strong desire to go somewhere unnamed came upon him and grew until it became an urgent need. He was being called . . . nay, summoned. He clutched the bed post as a terrible searing overtook his internal organs and he choked on air. It wasn’t possible. . . . Surely nobody would . . . Again, a seizing pain clawed at him.

  He gasped as he saw his flesh become transparent, fading into a mere whisper. It was true, then. Someone was invoking him. He prayed it wasn’t Theia—but he had no business praying, did he?

  He damned himself for not warning her about this. It was too late for damning, though, and she would know that soon enough.

  His body disappeared, and the invoking had been accomplished. Unfortunately for whoever had called him, Haden remained in Under.

  Anticipation battered us with stinging whips of sensation. Would it work? Did I want it to work? By the look on Varnie’s face, I most decidedly did not. The last chant was spoken, the air stilled, the flame of each candle sputtered, and we waited.

  The rain outside pummeled the cabin and the wind roared ferociously, whistling through cracks in the not very sturdy walls. Lightning cracked the sky and where there had been nothing, there was now Haden.

  “Hello, lamb. Miss me?”

  Donny jumped up. “I’ll get the lights.”

  Varnie put a stilling hand on my arm as I instinctively moved towards Haden. “Wait.”

  An overhead fixture lit the room and my eyes sought Haden. He was so beautiful it hurt to look at him. I swallowed, relief overwhelming me. “Thank God you’re okay.”

  Haden stared into my eyes. “I don’t think we have God to thank for this, do we?”

  I started towards him, needing to be in his arms, hear his heartbeat, but Varnie pulled me back. Haden didn’t avert his gaze; instead he narrowed his eyes, as if he were looking at me for the first time. And then he smiled. The wicked smile. I straightened my spine despite its reluctance to do so. Something wasn’t right.

  Haden pushed himself up from the floor and out of our circle. “How fortunate I am that you’ve rescued me. Thank you all for this lovely turn of events.”

  An uncomfortable static picked up, and a humming din thrummed through the small room. Haden’s predatory mask overcame his handsome features, and he picked up Amelia’s hand, kissing each knuckle with mischief. My heart plummeted as I realized he was using the Lure on my best friend.

  Varnie yanked her away from Haden, putting himself between them, standing up slowly.

  Haden tsked. “Ah, she is spoken for, then? Too bad—all that power would be refreshing right now. I could fight you for her, I suppose, but it seems like a lot of work for a snack.”

  I stood up on shaky legs. “Haden, what’s going on?” He let down his mask when he looked at me, so I stepped closer. “Do you know who I am? Do you remember me?”

  “Of course I do, my little poppet. You’re the one who saved me.” He touched my hair carefully, reverently. “You’re lovely, really you are . . . but you’re rather . . . Well, let’s just say your essence isn’t as robust as your friends’. I’m sure I’ll get to you eventually.”

  With each ugly word, my heart broke into more pieces. “Haden, I don’t understand. I thought . . . I thought you had feelings for me.”

  He laughed and gazed across the room at Donny like she was a treat in a sweet shop. “I’m a demon. Have you learned nothing? Demons don’t love; they especially don’t love silly little girls who hide from anything that isn’t careful or prescribed as safe by Daddy. Your pragmatism bores me to tears. You were a fun diversion, for a while, but that is all you will ever be.”

  I looked down at the ball gown I still wore, and I felt so intolerably stupid. Had he been playing me this whole time? No, surely not. But his words crushed me and his face no longer resembled the boy I’d kissed.

  Maybe he had.

  I’d enabled him to come here, to my world, and wreak his havoc. When I thought of what an easy mark I’d been, I felt shamed. All he’d had to do was tell me he found me enchanting and dangle me on a string. I really was his little poppet. And now, the way he eyed Donny, he was going to hurt the people I loved most because I was an idjit with a dangerously foolish heart.

  Why had I stopped listening to my father? He was right—about me, about everything. And now I was trapped in a cabin with the devil because I was reckless just like my mother.

  “It’s possible that this whole thing is my fault,” said Varnie, very carefully keeping Ame behind him while he edged towards the door, where an uncharacteristically quiet Donny still stood by the light switch. “Perhaps we should have used some more-specific wording in the evocation chant.”

  “Ya think?” Donny answered back.

  Haden grinned, and my legs turned rubbery with fear. There wasn’t a trace of the person I thought he was in that smile. “Perhaps you are right, sir. It seems you brought forth your demon . . . but you forgot something.” He waggled his finger as if Varnie were a precocious child.

  Varnie rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Yes, yes. I see my mistake very clearly now.” He’d worked his way across the room so that now he stood in front of both Donny and Amelia, leaving me in the center of the room with Haden. Perhaps there was hope that he could get the two of them out safely.

  I had a feeling I was doomed.

  Then Varnie, the self-professed coward, looked Haden in the eye and said, “Sit down on that chair.” He pointed to a worn wooden dining chair.

  Haden complied immediately with a confounded expression.

  “I’m new. I’m inexperienced. But did you really think I would call you to my realm without the caveats?” Varnie practically spat the words at Haden.

  Haden was stunned into silence. We all were.

  “You are here by my edict only. You will do nothing unless I command it.” Varnie didn’t generally project leadership qualities, and yet Haden swallowed whatever he would have replied with. He hadn’t been commanded to speak, it seemed, so he would not.

  Varnie called me over. I didn’t understand the dynamics of what was going on, but at that point I was more than ready to escape. I picked up the hem of my gown, prepared to prance across the room as quickly as I could. Instead, I stopped cold. The shadows of my friends disengaged and fled across the wall.

  No, not again.

  Not my friends.

  I watched the forms race across the wall. Something was coming.

  “Get outside!” I called to them all. “Run!”

  Donny resisted, but Varnie and Amelia seemed to understand the change in the atmosphere of the cabin. They had to drag her, but they got Donny out the door before it slammed closed like the lid of my coffin.

  I flinched at the sound, but I couldn’t move my legs to join them. It was as if I’d been bolted to the floor.

  Haden hadn’t moved from his chair either. I don’t think he was able to do anything against Varnie’s wishes—a side effect of the summoning that I hadn’t understood. He didn’t seem worried. It was probably his mother coming to rescue him, aft
er all. He smirked at me, and I wanted to hate him.

  But I didn’t.

  A whisper of brimstone reached my nose, and I waited for the scraping noises. But no skeletons came through a portal in the wall this time; instead, I blinked and found myself instantly back in the empty banquet room of Mara’s castle.

  Alone.

  While the experience of traveling between the realms was much more pleasant this time than incinerating had been, I dared not be relieved to find myself back in Under. Especially without an ally.

  The pain of Haden’s betrayal stung again as I remembered he had never been an ally. I looked at our empty seats at the long table, remembering how to fool his mother he’d pretended so stoically that I meant nothing to him. What an actor my demon was.

  I wondered why he hadn’t joined me.

  I waited a few minutes for Mara to summon me somewhere. She had brought me here, after all. Every time I blinked, the writhing creature on the platter was projected across my mind’s eye, the ghouls masquerading as revelers. I couldn’t stay in that room any longer. I took my chances in the corridor.

  I tried to find the room where I’d been groomed like a prize pet as a gift for the heir apparent—the room where I’d nearly lost my virtue to a monster. The corridor made many turns, none of them I remembered. For a castle so large, there were very few doors. Just an unending corridor.

  After following it for some time, I began to think of it as a labyrinth. Once again, I was the entertainment, it seemed—the rat in a maze. Perhaps Mara was stalking me and would jump out at some point. Perhaps, more likely, she would let me unravel my sanity like a ball of yarn as I passed hour upon unending hour traveling through her game course.

  I came upon a door finally. It was left ajar, so I pushed it with my toe. Haden’s room. Reason dictated that I not dare enter. A tidal wave of emotion propelled me inside. What had he called me? A silly little girl. Boring.

  I replayed every moment with him with this new unflattering filter. The deeper into his room I stepped, the harder each punch of every memory became. Every touch, every kiss. I ran my hand along his furniture and ached with regret and . . . longing. I missed him still, the figment of my girlish imagination. A silk shirt hung on the back of a chair. I brought it to my nose and inhaled the scent of my love dying.

  Haden watched her heart breaking in front of him. Powerless to dry her tears, he could only ghost around the room in a fruitless rage against his helplessness. Theia held his shirt and sank to the floor. She was giving up hope. She no longer believed in him.

  For the first time in his life, Haden was free of his demon side, of all his terrible urges, and yet he would take it back if it meant he could hold her now when she needed him most. His mother would find her soon, of that he was certain. He couldn’t protect Theia. He’d never protected her. Not really.

  What a mess he’d made of both their lives.

  He lowered himself to the floor in front of her. Not that it mattered. He was ethereal now. It was probably better this way, since if he’d kept his body, the demon that they’d invoked on command would have been incorporeal and a lot harder to contain. For the sake of Serendipity Falls, he very much hoped they were trying to contain him.

  Haden ached to press a kiss to Theia’s cheek. To speak so she would hear him.

  He loved her. He’d never said it to her, never said it aloud. He had thought it would be easier for her that way, but now he was filled with regret because she would never know.

  Nothing changed in the room, and yet I felt a shift. Something pleasant and warm surrounded me like sunshine, touching all of me at once. I looked around for the source of the heat, but there was nothing. And then I felt it. A feather-light stroke on my cheek. I swallowed hard and waited. Would it happen again?

  When I closed my eyes, I saw Haden crouched in front of me. When I opened them in surprise, there was nothing there. I shuttered them closed again and saw him briefly before I flinched and drew back. The corset I still wore made it hard to take a deep breath.

  It had been such a long, terrible night. I was scared and so tired. I still wore the dress that I would likely die in. I missed my father and my friends. Haden had taken all that from me—my entire world, my security. And yet, when I’d glimpsed him just then, I missed him too.

  I closed my eyes again, resisting the urge to open them when he appeared before me, gentle and caring. He wore the same clothes as he had during our wedding banquet and he was rumpled—so unlike him. Lines of worry and concern crossed his forehead.

  How was he here and why could I see him only with my eyes closed?

  He mouthed the words “I love you.”

  My heart, my foolish, pitiful, stupid heart, raced. I knew better.

  “No more games,” I whispered back. “You don’t love anyone. Demons can’t love.” I opened my eyes so I didn’t have to look at him anymore. Somehow I found my voice. “You make me sick, Haden. The way you use people, the way you used me. You didn’t need to put so much effort into it, you know. I think I belonged to you the moment you welcomed me into your hell.”

  I got up off the floor. I was tired of wallowing.

  “How you must have laughed at my humiliation. Wind Theia up and watch her do her stupid dance.” My voice got louder. “Watch how her eyes shine with innocence every time she’s told she’s special. Watch how she crumples whenever Haden touches another girl.”

  The rage felt kind of nice—a balm for the irritated skin of my humiliation.

  “Well, you’ve stamped out all that’s left of that stupid child, Haden. I’m hollow now—is that what you wanted?” I tossed his silk shirt across the room, angry that it was too soft to fly very far. “God”—my voice broke—“when I think of how I had to beg you for that first kiss.”

  That kiss had meant everything to me. Everything. My lower lip trembled. I couldn’t possibly cry again, could I? “You don’t deserve my tears, Haden.” And yet they came. “But I . . . I deserve everything you’ve done to me for being so gullible.”

  “Be sure to spare some of your tears, child.” Mara’s chilling voice brought my gaze to the door with a start. “Your suffering has barely begun.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  Mara was alone, but I knew instinctively she was more powerful than the guards she usually sent to do her bidding. She was of average height, and slender, but the power she wielded had nothing to do with brute strength. She wore a blue velvet dress that pretended to be proper and Victorian, but was cut so low as to not leave much to the imagination.

  I froze in place, but Mara swooped in, a hawk and a field mouse. “I’ve been pining for some girl talk alone with you, pussycat. I just know we’ll be fast friends.” She paused and one corner of her mouth lifted in a sardonic smile. “Won’t that be fun?”

  I cast my eyes to the floor.

  “I’m accustomed to people answering me when I speak, child.”

  Mara grabbed my chin in her viselike grip and forced me to look at her. Her eyes darkened until once again the whites were absorbed into her inky pupils. It almost appeared as if she had no eyes, just gaping holes where they should have been.

  “Yes,” I whimpered.

  She let go with a little thrust and I fell back a step before regaining my feet.

  “Much better, my pet.”

  I winced, remembering how well she didn’t care for her pets.

  Mara flounced around the room in her gown, inspecting the things on Haden’s shelves with animated curiosity. “It may surprise you to know that I’ve never had girl talk before.” She angled her chin and looked up like she was trying to remember. “I tend to think it’s because I always have to remove the larynx so early.” She picked up one of Haden’s video games and appeared to read the back of it. “It’s unfortunate, but when humans lose their mind, they tend to scream ceaselessly or ramble incoherently. It’s tiresome. I’ve never had one who could carry on a decent conversation.” She turned to me. “What do you think it will be li
ke to lose your mind, Theia?”

  The hair on my nape stood on end. I had to answer her. “I don’t know.”

  “You have been a sliver in my flesh for a long time, pussycat. I am very much looking forward to removing you.”

  My body began freezing again, like it did at the banquet. The blood in my veins and the breath in my lungs crystallized painfully. I knew this was only the beginning. I knew she had every intention of pushing me to the edge of sanity over and over again until I was just like the rest of her ghoulish menagerie. If I were strong, I’d find a way to end her fun soon, while I still had the ability to do so.

  As though in response to that thought, I felt the warm sensation again. I closed my eyes and Haden was in front of me, as if he were holding me. Perhaps I’d already lost my wits, because I let him.

  His mother couldn’t see him, but surely she knew he was there. She stopped the torture and left Theia gasping on frost.

  Theia wasn’t strong enough to go toe to toe with his mother. No one was. And without form he was as useful as mist.

  He was surprised when Theia was able to see him, even more surprised when she felt his touch—ghostlike as it was. He couldn’t physically touch her and that cut him like a knife.

  Haden recalled the things Theia had said to him and the pain in her voice. So she’d met the demon, then, before she was brought back Under. He wished she hadn’t. She was going to need every scrap of faith she had to come through this, and he could see the demon had stolen it from her. He’d certainly killed the love she had for Haden.

  And now nobody had anything.

  I fell to my knees and shuddered with each new breath. Mara crossed the room and stood before me.

  “You understand that I’m not going to kill you for many, many years, don’t you? But when I do, your death will be slow.”

  “Yes, I understand,” I responded shakily, remembering she demanded that I answer.