Ruin: Levi Hunter's Story (Black Hearts Still Beat Book 4)

by L A Cotton

  Fuck.

  “Here, Levi. Drink this, it’s sooo good.” The blonde licked her lips, bringing her glass to my lips. It was some fizzy cocktail, all sugary sweetness.

  “Will it make everything disappear?” I asked her.

  “It’ll make you feel like you’re flying,” she winked, pushing it to my lips. I opened my mouth letting her feed me the drink until I’d drained the glass empty.

  “I heard you like a good time.” Her fingers scraped my jaw as she ghosted her lips over mine. “Well, this will blow your fucking mind.”

  The words spun around in my head as she smirked at me.

  “What the—” I pushed her off me and she stumbled off my lap, sending glasses spilling everywhere.

  “Levi?” Rafe leaped up.

  “I need to go.” I clambered to my feet, my muscles already heavy like lead.

  “You keep making good music, son,” Dowager’s voice sounded stretched out and wrong.

  “Levi?” Johnson discreetly grabbed my arm, guiding me away from the crowds.

  “I think... she... fuck.” My head began to spin.

  “Levi?” Rafe caught up to me. “What’s wrong?”

  “I think she laced my drink.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “I need to get back to the hotel.” Before the effects of whatever she slipped me—most probably G—kicked in.

  “Have the girls already left?” Rafe asked Johnson.

  He touched his earpiece and said, “They’re just about to leave. If we’re quick, we can make it.”

  “Rafe,” Eva called.

  “Go get her” I said, my face growing numb. “We’ll wait for you.”

  “Levi?” Letty gawked at me as Johnson pushed me inside. I stumbled onto the long leather bench.

  “Some fucking bitch laced my drink.”

  “WHAT?” she shrieked.

  I nodded, leaning my head back and closing my eyes.

  “Blondie?” Phoebe asked and I nodded again, not bothering to look at her.

  I didn’t want to see the disappointment. Not when I could feel it heavy in the air the second I’d climbed into the SUV.

  “What was it?” Letty asked.

  “Probably G.”

  “Fuck,” she hissed. “That’s messed up.”

  “She probably thought she was doing me a favor.”

  “Here.” Phoebe pressed a cold bottle of water into my hand, and I finally dropped my eyes to hers.

  “Thanks. But it won’t stop the high.”

  “I know.” Sadness seeped into her expression. “But it’ll keep you hydrated.”

  “Listen, honeybee, I—”

  The doors opened again and Rafe and Eva piled inside. “Alistair and the others are staying behind to deal with Dowager and the girl.” My brother gave me a small nod. “We got you,” he said.

  “Don’t fret, brother, being roofied feels damn amazing so far.”

  As the minutes ticked by, I couldn’t feel my face, and my body started to grow hot all over. But damn, whatever it was she had slipped me was some good shit. I felt weightless, my skin buzzing with sensation.

  “Isn’t there anything we can do?” Eva’s voice sounded all funny, like she was underwater.

  “Not really. He just needs to wait for it to wear off.”

  “Which could take how long exactly?”

  “A few hours or until he passes out.”

  That was Phoebe, I’d know her voice anywhere.

  Someone snickered. At least, I think they did as I started to sink deeper into a warm blissed out state of mind.

  “Levi,” a little voice whispered. But not her voice. No, this voice was soft and kind. This voice made me want crawl out of the darkness and embrace the light. “Try and stay with us.”

  Something soft brushed my hand and I moaned. Fuck, that felt good.

  “Do it again,” I rasped, willing my eyes to focus. Phoebe’s face filled my blurry vision. “Hey, Bee.”

  “Hey, Levi.” She gave me a smile, but it was all sad and defeated.

  “What’s wrong, baby girl?” I said, reaching for her cheek, brushing my fingers back and forth. Phoebe let out a heavy sigh, gently pulling my hand away from her skin.

  “We’re almost at the hotel.”

  “We are?” I tried to sit up, my body swaying. Phoebe shuffled closer, pressing her arm closer to mine. “God, I want to fuck you, honeybee. I want to bury myself so deep inside you, you can’t ever make me leave.” I leaned in, running my nose along her jaw, smelling her. “Fuck, you smell good.”

  “Levi.” Phoebe tried to push me away, but I was a dead weight against her.

  “Don’t ever leave,” I whispered. “Everyone always leaves—”

  The car lurched to a stop and the doors all opened. “He might need some help,” someone said, and then hands were grabbing me, helping me from the SUV.

  “I can fucking stand.” I shirked the hulk of a guy off.

  “Bee.” I searched the underground parking lot for her. When I couldn’t see her, panic coursed through my veins. “BEE?”

  “I’m right here.” She appeared at my side.

  “Thank fuck.” I grabbed her hand, lacing our fingers together. “I thought you’d left me.”

  “I didn’t go anywhere.”

  We followed security toward the elevator.

  “Someone’s going to need to watch him tonight,” she said.

  “I’ll do it,” Rafe said. My brother. My protector. Even now, when he hated me, he still found a way to keep me safe. I owed him. I owed him so fucking much.

  “Love you, man,” I said, my tongue like cotton in my mouth.

  Someone chuckled, but it was hard to focus. Everything—the strip-lighting, the motion of the elevator, the scent of Phoebe’s perfume—called to my senses, the overstimulation a potent rush through my veins.

  Phoebe’s fingers brushed my hand, sending little shocks of electricity zipping up my arm. I wanted her to rub herself all over my body, to light me up from the inside out. If I could just keep my fucking head upright for more than a second.

  “Jesus, he’s a mess.”

  Somebody, Phoebe I think, pulled me out of the elevator and along the hall.

  “You smell so good.” I nuzzled her neck and we both stumbled against the wall.

  “Levi, stop.” She held me at arm’s length, brushing the hair from my eyes. “You need to sleep it off.”

  “Stay with me.” I grinned, my jaw slack and heavy.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “Please, Bee, I need you.”

  Her brows pinched together.

  “I’ll beg. Don’t make me beg.”

  “Fine. Just for a little while.”

  “Yes,” I punched the air. “She loves me. Honeybee still loves me.”

  Phoebe sucked in a harsh breath, watching me with a cloudy expression. Or maybe that was my eyes that made her seem cloudy.

  It didn’t fucking matter though because my Bee was here... and she was staying.

  “Levi, just stop, man.” Rafe tried to wrestle the cell phone out of my hand.

  “Just one more.” I scrolled through the playlist, no fucking clue what I was searching for. All I knew was we needed something with a heavy beat.

  “Let me try.” Phoebe appeared.

  “Bee, get over here.” I grabbed her hand and yanked her toward me. “Let’s dance.”

  “It’s late, Levi. We need to get some rest.”

  “Just one more song.” I spun her around so her back was pressed against my chest and tucked my chin into her shoulder. “I love this one.”

  “You love Yellow Submarine by The Beatles?” She snorted.

  I hugged her tighter. I wanted her naked. To feel her skin pressed close to mine. I was already shirtless, my body temperature too warm for clothes.

  “Go,” she said, and I realized Rafe and Eva were still here, watching me with concerned expressions.

  “You can go,”
I added. “Bee will look after me. Won’t you, baby girl?”

  “We’ll be close if you need us,” Rafe said, ignoring me.

  “I can handle him.”

  “Of course you can handle me.” I brushed my lips over her neck, loving the way she tasted on my tongue. My hands splayed on her stomach, desperate to feel her skin.

  “Levi,” she said. “I don’t think that’s—”

  “Ssh. I need you Bee, I need you so fucking much.” If I didn’t get to sink inside her soon, I would die a slow painful death, burning up from the inside out. “Let’s go to our bedroom.”

  “You’re high.” Her tone grew irritated.

  “And you’re fucking delicious.” I licked and nipped her skin. I needed to look up the girl from the club and send her a thank you note because whatever she’d slipped in my drink was fucking magic. I felt amazing. Endorphins raced through me, making me feel like I could fly.

  “Levi, stop... stop.” Phoebe tried to untangle herself from my arms, but I spun us around and started walking her toward my bedroom. I needed her underneath me, naked and waiting, her perfect fucking curves on full display. Her ink and piercings and smooth as silk skin.

  We stumbled through the door, and Phoebe managed to slip free of my hold. The soft thunk of the door closing behind us echoed through my chest as I watched her inch back.

  “Don’t play hard to get, Bee. You know this only ends one of two ways.” I toyed with my lip piercings.

  “You’re high. Tomorrow you won’t remember any of this.”

  I prowled toward her. My hands were already at my jeans, unsnapping my belt and pushing them off my hips. My dick was rock hard, desperate for her.

  Starved for her.

  “Skin like silk, eyes like honey, this girl will rip out your heart before you can blink,” I murmured the lyrics as I crowded her against the wall. Phoebe’s eyes were wide as I leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth.

  “I need inside you, baby girl.”

  “Don’t... don’t call me that.” Her eyes fluttered closed as she inhaled in a sharp breath. “I’m not one of them, Levi. I’m not one of your groupie whores.”

  “No.” I slid my hand to her throat. “You are so much more. My girl. My honeybee. My love.” Her body went rigid. “Does that scare you, Bee? To know that I love you? Because I do, you know. I am hopelessly and obsessively in love with you. And now I’ve told you, you can’t ever leave me.”

  “Oh, Levi,” she whispered, staring right into my black soul. “What am I going to do with you?”

  Phoebe

  Deep down, every girl wanted those three little words. They were magical, seductive, and comforting. But I didn’t want them like this, never like this.

  Levi was high. Off his face on liquor and GHB. All because a girl—some deceptive little bitch—had spiked his drink to get her shot with the rock star. The thought made me sick to my stomach. It made me want to go back to the club and hunt her down. But Levi needed me here.

  “Did you hear me, Bee? I fucking love you.”

  God, I wanted to believe him. I wanted to latch onto those words and never let go. But he didn’t have a clue about what he was saying.

  I knew enough about GHB to know that the right dose could make someone feel euphoric and extremely turned on. It wasn’t Zephyr’s poison of choice, but he’d taken it a couple of times at parties and it always ended in us fighting because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself. Once, I’d found him about to get his dick sucked by some skank in a bathroom. He’d been so fucking high, he thought it was me.

  Pain stabbed through me. God, I’d put up with some crap, all because I was a girl in love with a guy who loved getting high.

  I’d watched Zephyr pass out, have seizures, foam at the mouth, and be carted off by an ambulance more times that I could count. Being with an addict was like being the mistress in a relationship. Because their one true love would always be chasing the high.

  When I’d finally walked away from him, I’d vowed never to find myself in the same situation.

  Yet, here I was. In so deep with Levi Hunter, I didn’t know which way was up.

  But there was something different about Levi. He didn’t get high to feel good or party all night or because he could. He did it to escape his monsters.

  He did it to survive.

  It didn’t make it any better or easier or safer... but it did go some way to explaining his addiction.

  And tonight, he hadn’t let himself fall into the darkness. He’d immediately removed himself from all temptation.

  That had to count for something, didn’t it?

  “Bee, I need you.” He kissed me again, just a faint brush of his lips against mine. His fingers stroked my throat, tender and teasing.

  “Levi, we shouldn’t—”

  Resistance was futile. Levi was too high to hear the word no. Too overpowered by the chemicals coursing through his system.

  “You make it all quiet, Bee. You settle my soul.” His intense gaze burned into mine. His pupils were blown, the heat rolling off him in powerful waves.

  “You won’t remember this in the morning,” I said around a sad smile.

  “Wrong.” He shook his head. “I remember everything about you, honeybee. I remember the way you cry my name. How hot and tight you feel as I slide inside you. I remember how sweet you taste... I’ll remember, Bee. Because you’re already in here.” He tapped his temple.

  My eyes fluttered shut, overwhelmed at his words, the situation. Levi was starved of affection. He’d never been given the unconditional love of a mother. Those early attachment bonds had never settled into place, and now his emotions were all confused, his wiring all wrong.

  But when I opened my eyes and saw him watching me, I felt it. I felt his love for me punch me right in the gut.

  “Levi, I—”

  His mouth crashed down on mine, stealing the air from my lungs and all rational thought from my brain. His touch was desperate, needy and feral. His fingers touched and pressed and grabbed, as if he might never get this feeling again and wanted to cling onto it for as long as possible.

  “Fuck, Bee, you’re so fucking sexy, I can’t get enough of you.” His words were slurred, low and rough. He peppered my face with kisses. Hot, wet, clumsy kisses that left me breathless and wanting.

  My head was screaming at me to stop him, to take the high road and stop this madness. But my body was a tight ball of sensation, all too happy to drown in his touch; and my heart, my heart was a runaway train heading straight for disaster.

  “Off.” He grunted, clawing at my dress. “This needs to come off.” We barely broke the kiss so he could peel my dress over my head. My hands pushed his jeans down over his hips, my fingertips grazing his hardness.

  “Fuuuuck, Bee. I need inside you, I can’t wait. I swear to fucking God I’ll die if I don’t get inside you in the next two seconds.” Levi grabbed my panties and tore them clean off my body before picking me up and pressing me against the nearest wall. He didn’t even give me warning, just sank inside me. I whimpered, scratching my nails over his shoulders. It was too much. His touch. His punishing rhythm. The way he knew exactly how to play my body to make me cry his name.

  His mouth dropped to my collarbone, sucking and kissing the skin there, leaving a trail of hickeys I knew I would regret tomorrow. But I couldn’t stop myself.

  I couldn’t stop him.

  The innate part of me that wanted to fix him, wanted him to take whatever he needed from me. If it wasn’t me, I knew he’d probably have found another girl to lose himself in tonight. Maybe the blonde from the club, maybe some other girl who only wanted her one night with a rock star. Or maybe he would have continued drinking, taking more drugs, until he passed out... or worse.

  A shiver ran through me, and I pulled Levi closer into my body. He walked such a dangerous tightrope, all recovering addicts did.

  “Levi, it’s... God...” I cried as he continued fucking me against the wall. His eye
s were black, his body coated in sweat. It was like he was possessed, lost to the euphoria and soul-crushing hunger.

  “I need more, Bee... I need...” He buried his face in the crook of my neck, his body trembling.

  Panic rose inside me. “Levi?” I tried to nudge him back. “Levi.”

  “I’m okay,” he murmured. “I just need...”

  “Lay me down,” I said, softly.

  He stilled, inhaling a harsh breath. Cradling me against his body, Levi carried me to the bed and lay me down. He stood there, looming over me, his dark eyes trailing a blazing path over my body as he stroked himself.

  Levi’s knee landed on the bed and he crawled over me, kissing up my body as he went. He stared down at me. “Promise me, Bee. Promise me that you’ll never leave me.”

  “Levi, I...” The words were right there, on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t do it.

  “Say it.” He kissed me hard and deep, letting his tongue plunder my mouth, as he rocked slowly into me. We both groaned, the connection so powerful, it swept us in its devastation.

  Desperate hands grabbed my thighs, spreading me wide as he went harder... deeper, trying to reach inside me and leave a mark. “Say it, Bee. Fucking say it.” His words were thick, drowsy, as he continued driving inside me.

  My legs ached, my body lax and pliant beneath him. But he didn’t stop. He didn’t stop after I clenched around him, crying out his name over and over. He kept going, chasing the high. The fall. The bittersweet climax.

  Eventually, Levi let out a guttural roar, jerking inside me. His body collapsed on top of me, rolling to the side. “Fuck, baby girl,” he crooned, slipping into unconsciousness. “That was... fuck.”

  My eyes stung with tears. He didn’t know it was me anymore. I could have been any girl, any body, warm, wet, and willing.

  I slipped out of bed and hurried into the bathroom to clean up. I was a mess, covered in bite marks and bruises. After I was done, I wrapped myself in a fluffy hotel robe, got a glass of water and went back into the bedroom. Levi was out cold. I rolled him into the recovery position, checked his breathing, and placed the glass of water on the side. Then I curled up in the chair and watched him sleep, knowing that tonight, I would get none.