Success Is Not an Accident

by Tommy Newberry

  Although you probably agree that maximum service to God is a great definition of success, it’s a difficult concept by which to evaluate yourself. So, for the express purpose of this book, we’ll use the highly effective working definition of true success that we use in The 1% Club: Success is the deliberate, measurable pursuit of prayerfully chosen, written goals.

  Stated another way, you are a success once you have seriously begun your expedition to maximize your full potential. Success, then, is not a single destination—and consequently, you can never completely arrive. Success is, instead, an intentional approach to life that ensures you are a faithful steward of your gifts and talents. This approach compels you to grow and develop. It forces you to desert your comfort zone, chisel your character, and chase the dream that God has personally arranged for you. Better still, success is an approach to life that is completely under your control. It does not depend on the outer circumstances of your life but on the inner condition of your soul. So with the above definition in mind, are you successful right now?

  Did you pray about your goals before you set them?

  Have you put your goals in writing for accountability?

  Have you taken measurable action toward your goals?

  A different way of viewing success is as an emotion we all want to experience consistently. We may be successful in the eyes of others yet not feel so successful inside our own skin. Or we may feel successful but not be perceived that way by others. Most of us go through life borrowing someone else’s definition of success rather than coming up with our own! Through repeated media exposure, we find it easy to begin using cultural success markers.

  Five criteria to help crystallize your unique definition of success

  1. Controllable

  Make your definition within your control, not based on outside circumstances or other people.

  2. Measurable

  Make your definition quantifiable so that you can hold yourself accountable.

  3. Perpetual

  Formulate your definition so that you can satisfy it on a daily basis.

  4. Personal

  Choose your own definition; don’t borrow one.

  5. Principle Based

  Establish your definition on absolute truths, not on subjective, timely, or situational values.

  Are you experiencing success right now? If you are not, take some time to re-examine your concept of success. Where does your definition come from? Whose definition are you using? I found that distinguishing between the words achievement, happiness, and success was a helpful exercise in formulating my own definition. Consider these three questions:

  Can you be a success without achieving anything?

  Can you be a high achiever without being successful?

  Can you be happy without also being a success?

  How did you answer these questions? Of course, your answer depends on how you define success. Is your definition challenging, attainable, and anchored in biblical truth? Or do you require all areas of your life to be perfect before you allow yourself to experience the emotion of success? Be aware that a common tendency is to set an almost unreachable standard for success while simultaneously creating a standard for failure that is easy to meet. As a result, you may routinely feel a lot less successful than is necessary. When you create a definition of success that allows you to experience the emotion consistently, you are also developing an awareness of success. And this heightened consciousness tends to promote even more and greater success in the future. Success breeds success. The working definition I proposed earlier invites you to experience success on your journey to your final destination.

  Now it’s your turn. Take a moment and develop a first draft of your personal definition of success by completing the short sentence below. You can expect to revise it several times before you get it just right. Yes, I promise that it is okay to write in this book.

  I experience success in my life when I (or, if I) . . .

  Once you have your fresh, constructive definition of success, allow some time to internalize it and really believe in it. You have to buy into it to get it working for you. Remember, success is the ongoing, proactive process of making God’s desires your desires, becoming today a little more like the person he engineered you to become. I believe you should consider yourself a success the instant you take measurable action toward a prayerfully chosen goal that you have placed in writing. As you will learn in lesson 3, God plus goals plus you is an unbeatable combination!

  “Fair” Is a Fantasy

  Another key step in striving for success is to get over expecting life to be fair. A level playing field is a self-indulgent and unproductive fantasy. In this world, it will never happen, nor should it. Insisting on a level playing field disrupts your attention and distracts you from your ultimate objective. Instead, as a high performer, you must deal with the reality of the present situation. You need to focus on reaching your goals rather than on the obstacles that stand in your way. This choice leads to accomplishment and progress, and it leads away from aggravation and alienation. Recognize that everyone has disadvantages, handicaps, weaknesses, and various other crosses to bear. A big part of life is learning how to transform your disadvantages into advantages. While directing your energy toward “making things fair” is often counterproductive, channeling your spiritual, mental, and physical energy toward achieving meaningful goals is a constructive investment of time.

  Some people are naturally more intelligent than others. Some people are more creative than others. Some are born into poverty, and some into wealth. Some receive great love and little else, while many others are given everything but love. Some people are considered better looking than others. Some people can run faster, jump higher, or hit a baseball farther than others. Some receive the best of educations and contribute little to the world, while others get little formal education yet leave a magnificent mark. Some have fast metabolisms while others must exercise twice as much just to keep pace. Some people are predisposed to migraines and sinus infections and others are not . . . and so on. This phenomenon is called life.

  The truth is that life, if viewed as a card game, deals good hands, bad hands, and average hands. And whichever hand you receive, you must play! You can win with any hand, and you can lose with any hand. It’s totally up to you how you play the game! Life is filled with champions who drew extremely poor hands and losers who drew terrific hands. In life, you will never be dealt a hand that, with God’s help, cannot be turned into a winning one. Success is for you and for anyone willing to take the initiative and pay the price. If you put into practice the principles outlined in each lesson of this book, you will be well equipped to do whatever it takes to turn your hand into a winner! Go for it!

  Sow, Then Reap

  Success is a planned outcome, not an accident. Success and mediocrity are both absolutely predictable because they follow the natural and immutable law of sowing and reaping. Simply stated, if you want to reap more rewards, you must sow more service, contribution, and value. That is the no-nonsense formula. Some of God’s blessings have prerequisites! Success in life is not based on need but on seed. So you’ve got to become good at either planting in the springtime or begging in the fall.

  The Bible says, “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap” (Galatians 6:7, NKJV). Unfortunately, many Americans have been misled into believing they will not be held accountable for their choices and that they will miraculously harvest something other than what they planted. I call this the Big Lie. This dangerously popular distortion promotes mediocrity and underachievement. Consider the effort and expense Americans undertake to cure diseases and social problems while they do very little, if anything, to avoid them. It is popular today to treat the symptom of a problem, but it is often considered insensitive or intolerant to address the root causes. As a result, our society denies that effects really do have causes.

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; When you try to get something for nothing, you become nothing.

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  The truth is this: There are no exceptions to the law of causality. It is impartial and impersonal, and it comes to us in a particular order—first sow, then reap. This God-given natural law was old when the pyramids were new. Like gravity, it works twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, everywhere in the world, regardless of whether anyone has ever told you about it or whether you consider it to be fair. It is simply impossible to harvest something that has not been sown, though many squander their entire lives attempting to do just this, only to end up frustrated.

  Success is the effect generated by right thinking and right actions. Success and failure are not accidents but consequences. If you want to know what you sowed in the past, look around you and see what you are reaping today. You begin your climb toward your full potential as a human being the moment you accept the truth that cause and consequence are inseparable.

  The mark of a spiritually mature, mentally healthy individual is accepting complete responsibility for one’s life. When you accept total responsibility, you recognize that you are the cause of all your choices, decisions, and actions. When you are anchored in the reality of responsibility, you are far more likely to act in ways that will not later become causes of regret, frustration, or embarrassment.

  What are the likely consequences of each of these actions?

  • jumping off a building

  • doing aerobic exercise daily

  • watching two or more hours of TV every day

  • reading for one hour each day

  • sitting in the sun without sunscreen

  • investing 10 percent of your income

  • using illicit drugs

  • eating a diet of whole grains and fresh fruits and vegetables

  • eating fried foods

  • running in front of a speeding truck

  • robbing a bank

  • lying to your best friend

  • studying hard in school

  • smoking

  • writing down goals

  • drinking excessive alcohol

  • drinking just a little alcohol

  • drinking no alcohol

  • studying parenting

  • reading a book on marriage

  • touching a hot stove

  • studying successful people

  • praying

  • purchasing depreciating assets

  • spending beyond your means

  • waking up at 5 a.m.

  • waking up at 7 a.m.

  Remember, when you make a choice, you also choose the consequences of that choice.

  Everything Counts

  Life offers all of us a special deal indefinitely. With every choice, we receive at least one free consequence. Everything you do or fail to do counts. Every action has a consequence, even if it isn’t immediate. At this moment, you are either becoming more like the person God wants you to become, or you are not! There is no neutrality.

  A number of years ago I was watching a baseball game on TV. The base runner, Deion Sanders, attempted to steal second base but came up about two feet short from the bag as he slid. He immediately sprang to his feet and backtracked toward first base. Seconds later, when it became inevitable that he was going to be tagged out, Sanders put his hands together in the football time-out sign. He yelled, “Time-out, time-out!”—to no avail, but to laughter from the fielder and the umpire. Sanders was tagged out. That is the way life is. Whether you’re running the bases or pursuing your goals, there are no time-outs. The sooner you learn and apply this lesson, the better.

  Nobody can stop the ticking clock. If you try to call time-out, you will always be tagged out. What you do Friday night counts, just as what you do Sunday morning or Thursday afternoon counts. An extraordinary life is simply the accumulation of thousands of efforts, often unseen by others, that lead to the accomplishment of worthwhile goals. You are rich with choice, and your choices reveal who you really are. More than any other single factor, you are where you are today because of the choices you have made. You’ve made decisions about what to learn and what not to learn. You have made decisions about who to spend your time with. You’ve made decisions to believe some things and not to believe others. You’ve made, or will have to make, decisions about whom you will date, whom you will marry, and whether you will have children. You’ve chosen to persevere or chosen to give up. You’ve made decisions on whether or not you will drink, smoke, or use drugs. You have chosen what you will eat or not eat. You’ve decided either to write down exciting goals for your life or just to wing it. You have made decisions to give in to fear as well as decisions to press on in the face of fear. You have decided to be the best and at other times decided to act like all the rest.

  Consider for a moment all the decisions you’ve made in the last three years or even in just the last twelve months. These choices are made daily, hourly, and minute by minute. Imagine having made a different choice in some key area. How might your professional life be different? How might your marriage be different? How might your health and energy be different? Give this some thoughtful reflection. How might your life be different today with a handful of different choices?

  Let me encourage you to do something differently now: Make today the turning point. Whether it’s your career or your home life, your fitness or your faith, you can start making wiser decisions and taking different steps today. Sooner than you may think possible, you will find yourself in a much better place than where you are right now.

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  My father taught me that the only helping hand you’re ever going to be able to rely on is at the end of your sleeve.

  —J. C. Watts

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  What’s Your Excuse?

  I believe the slogan of the Paralympics says it all: “What’s your excuse?” Questions are often the best teachers because they prompt us to think through an issue. When we’re told something, we’re likely to smile politely and then let our thoughts drift to another subject. Questions can be captivating because we’re conditioned to answer them. So ask yourself, “What is my excuse?” What images does this question evoke in your mind? As I ask myself, “What is my excuse?” my mind races to the aspects of my life that aren’t quite as I want them to be. The question reminds me of the excuses I’ve given others and those I’ve silently told myself. It makes me laugh a little at myself and reminds me that while I was making excuses, others just like me were making progress.

  I remember the first time I heard the classic excuse “My dog ate my homework” from a third-grade classmate who didn’t even have a dog. The entire class, including the teacher, broke out in laughter. I don’t remember whether the excuse was effective, but I do remember the laughter and the embarrassed expression on my classmate’s face. Looking back, I realize how appropriate the laughter was. Excuses should be laughed at, not dignified. Excuses and responsibility cannot coexist. It’s very easy to say, “I’m not responsible,” and so hard to say, “I am responsible.” If there is anything in your life that is not the way you want it to be, you and only you are responsible for changing it. You must believe that it is up to you to create solutions to the challenges of life. Whether they are big or small, you’re still responsible. Each time you give an excuse, you diminish your respect, your credibility, and your integrity. Each time you make an excuse, you reinforce your propensity to make even more excuses in the future, and excuse making becomes a habit. The irresponsible person believes finding the solutions to the problems of life is someone else’s department.

  Whenever you act irresponsibly and feel the need to make excuses, your brain goes into overdrive, attempting to rationalize your lack of results. Unless you make a commitment to the choice of excuse-free living, you will always be able to find excuses.

  The Excuse-Free Zone

  Commit to making your home
, car, and office excuse-free zones. If a situation arises in which previously you would have made an excuse, substitute the words, “I am responsible.” Look only to yourself for the cause of your problems. If you are not happy with an aspect of your life, accept that you are responsible for it. Either you passively allowed it to happen or you actively created it. This is not an invitation to beat up on yourself but an encouragement to see the truth of how and why you got to where you are. Only when you acknowledge the truth can you be freed to build a future that is far more attractive than the past.

  Whenever something doesn’t work out the way you hoped, claim responsibility and ask yourself, “What could I have done to avoid the problem?” Imagine opening your refrigerator and taking out the orange juice. Following the instructions on the label, you begin to shake the carton vigorously—only to have the cap fly off and orange juice spew all over you, the counters, the floor, and even a little on the ceiling. At this point, you have two options:

  1. You can immediately blame the numskull who didn’t screw on the cap after he used it and demand that he help you clean up, or . . .

  2. You can remind yourself, “This mess could have been avoided altogether if I had only checked the cap before I started shaking the carton. Of course, it would have been nice if the previous person had secured the cap, but the power to prevent this situation was in my hands.”