Whiskey Chick

by Ryan Ringbloom

  “He’s cute,” is all I say. I don’t want to give myself away completely.

  “He’s thirty-three, Senior Manager at Faulkner Corporation, placed in the New York City Marathon last year, and just bought one of the brand-new homes being built on Mill Lake,” she boasts proudly.

  “And he’s single?” I question, confused. And in need of a setup? I think but don’t say.

  “Yes,” Jenn says, but the way she gulps makes me think there’s more to it. “So, what do you think?”

  I don’t get a chance to answer. Henry returns with coffee in hand and takes a seat at the table. Jenn and I sit back, instantly shushing our conversation.

  “What am I interrupting?” Henry grins. “Are you telling Remi about Meghan Jones?”

  Jenn immediately breaks into laughter. “No, I haven’t told her that story yet. I’m waiting for when she gets to meet the whole family for that one.”

  “Meeting the fam, looks like you two are getting serious,” Henry teases. The gold in his eyes glistens, and I push away a few more strands of hair from my face.

  “Remi is the best,” Jenn says. She puts a finger to her lips and a conniving look spreads across her face. She’s got a plan. “In fact, I invited her up to the cabin on Friday for the long weekend. You’ll be there, right?”

  The cabin?

  “I will. I work late on Friday but plan on heading up on Saturday.” Henry turns to face me. “So you’ll be there too?”

  Jenn hadn’t invited me; this was the first I was hearing about it. I didn’t even know there was a cabin or where the hell it was. But sure, I’m up for a road trip if her good-looking, successful brother will be there.

  “Yeah, I think so,” I say, exchanging glances with Jenn, who claps her hands excitedly.

  “Great.” Henry’s eyes sweep over me, and he smiles.

  “So who’s Meghan Jones?” I ask curiously, going back to the earlier comment. Both Jenn and Henry laugh.

  “It’s a crazy story about this girl my brother dated,” Jenn says. “And not to worry, you will definitely get the full story when you meet the rest of my family.”

  “Uh-oh.” I smirk at Henry. “Are you okay with this crazy date story being shared?”

  “I’m fine with it.” He chuckles. “It wasn’t my crazy date, it was my brother’s.”

  Brother’s? Jenn has two brothers? Huh. I didn’t know that.

  “Well, I can’t wait to hear it,” I say, looking forward to the getaway and getting to know Henry better. I’m actually excited and can’t help but wonder about the sleeping accommodations. Is it a small cabin with close quarters? Is there potential for a late-night rendezvous in the woods? Will Henry bust out a flannel and chop wood so we can do it on top of a bearskin rug in front of the fire?

  I sip my latte and sink back against my chair with a sigh.

  The weekend ahead suddenly seems loaded with awesome possibilities.

  Losing My Head

  “Remi?”

  I turn around and come face-to-face with Henry, wavy hair, hazelicious eyes and all. What are the chances?

  “Henry. Hi,” I say, wishing I could reach up to fix my hair, but my hands are full. I have a wine bottle in each hand and a whiskey bottle tucked under my arm. None of which are for me.

  The wine is to bring as a hostess gift for Jenn’s parents for staying at their cabin, and the Jack Daniel’s is for my brother as a peace offering. I’ve decided if I want more positivity in my life, then I need to be more positive. The whiskey is actually for him and Paisley.

  “Stocking up?” he asks, followed by a chuckle.

  “No.” I laugh with him. “The wine is actually for the cabin this weekend. For your parents, a gift to say thank you.”

  “Look at you, as thoughtful as you are pretty,” he delivers smoothly, taking the bottles from my hands and placing them down on the counter for me. I untuck the whiskey and set it down next to the wine. Henry glances at the large bottle.

  “For my brother,” I say, knowing that probably sounds like a lie even though it isn’t. I hand the cashier my credit card, the one my dad still foots the bill for, but he doesn’t need to know that. “What are you doing over this way?” I ask. His office is in Princeton, and Jenn said he had bought a home in Mill Lake; both areas are nowhere near this part of Jersey.

  “This place has the best selection.” He glances down at the floor guiltily.

  That’s weird. Is this really a chance encounter, or did Jenn tell him where I live and he’s stalking me? And if he is stalking me, is that creepy or romantic? I want to say romantic, but I think that’s only because he’s good-looking. If he weren’t, I would probably think it was creepy as hell.

  “Well, around here we have the best selections of everything,” I say, still trying to figure things out. I mean, he’s Jenn’s brother so it’s not like he’s an actual stranger. “We even have a luxury movie theater with the reclining seats. Do you have one by you?”

  “We do.” He grins. “But I heard the one over here is much nicer. Maybe you and I can go see a movie sometime?”

  “Yeah, that would be great.” Now that my hands are free, I swipe at my hair, pushing it back, tucking it behind my ears. Maybe this really is just a coincidental encounter.

  “How about now?” he asks. “We can grab dinner first?”

  “Now? Right now?” Nope, he’s definitely here stalking me.

  “I figure since we’re here and you have the best luxury movie theater around, why not? Unless you have other plans.”

  “Uh….” My other plans are going home for another lonely night of watching TV while obsessively playing on my phone. Dinner and a movie with a cute guy sound a whole lot better. Unless he’s here to chop my head off. “Nothing I can’t change,” I say, risking my head over another night of loneliness.

  “Perfect. Shall we?” He holds an open arm out for me to go first.

  “Wait? Aren’t you getting anything?” I ask, grabbing my booze-filled bags.

  Henry looks down at the rows of wine bottles all lined up and takes a deep breath. “No.” He breathes out. “I think I got what I came here for.”

  Whaaaa?

  Okay, I was wrong, no dinner, no movie. I like my head. I’m scared and I try really hard for that not to register on my face.

  But fail.

  “Remi, I’m sorry. This probably looks so strange. But I can explain.” He shakes his head. “My ex and I broke things off a few months ago. Today I struggled with some doubts, and after leaving work, I came down here, where she lives. I was just about to pick up her favorite wine and go show up at her house unannounced and....” He closes his eyes and rubs his temple. “That would have been a huge mistake.” He opens his eyes and looks at me. “One you saved me from. I didn’t know this is where you lived. It’s just a coincidence. But I think running into you like this is a sign, a good one. It’s time to let go of the past and look toward the future.”

  I exhale a sigh of relief. My head is safe. He’s not a stalker. He’s cute and honest. And everyone loves a good sign.

  “There’s a sushi place by the theater. Do you eat sushi?” I ask, letting him know I’m on board for the future.

  “I love sushi.” He not only smiles at me but winks one of those golden-green eyes at me.

  My stomach gets a nervous flutter. Maybe Jenn’s gut feeling that I was meant for her brother was right.

  OMG.

  I’m probably gonna marry this guy.

  Sasha-imi

  “Sasha loves sashimi.” Henry studies his raw fish with a sigh before plopping it into his mouth.

  Sasha is his ex. She also loves butterflies, Merlot, thunderstorms, and black-and-white movies.

  Yeah... I’m not marrying this guy. I’ll be lucky if I make it through this date.

  “I love California rolls,” I say, but I don’t even think he’s listening.

  “We used to call it Sasha-imi.”

  “Very funny,” I say flatly, and fake a smile
.

  There is no spark. No connection. This date fucking blows. I’m not the future; if anything, I’m the rebound.

  “I’m sorry.” He pushes his plate away. “No more Sasha talk. I promise. I’m done. I think it’s just because we’re in her town and I’ve been here with her before that it’s just reminding me of her.”

  Since this is my town too that doesn’t bode too well. But hey—at least I’m paving the way for the next girl.

  “Tell me about your job,” I say. Not that it matters, at this point, I’ll just be tuning out everything he says. And after this, we still have to sit through a two-hour movie plus previews.

  Kill me.

  How can I make this night go faster? Hmm. Maybe I can get Jenn to call me with a fake emergency. Although that’d be kinda fucked-up, being it’s her brother I’m trying to escape from.

  Yuck. Jenn.

  Telling her it didn’t work out is gonna suck. I guess this means her little cabin plan is foiled. It looks like I won’t be going anymore. That’s too bad; I was looking forward to a weekend away.

  “But enough about my job, tell me about you.” Henry breaks my thoughts. “How do you like school?”

  Wow, I did not catch one word about his job. Not one word.

  “School is good, I like it a lot. I only wish I’d done it sooner.”

  The waitress approaches with two small glasses, setting them down in front of us.

  “Enjoy,” she says before walking away.

  “What is this?” I ask, bringing the cup up to my lips for a sip.

  “Sake,” Henry says, and I discreetly spit the small sip back into the cup before setting it down. “I ordered it when you were in the ladies’ room. I hope that’s okay.”

  “Yeah, it’s great.” I like sake but after my little incident two years ago, I made it a rule that I no longer drink on dates.

  “Sasha loves sake.”

  And right about now I’m beginning to rethink that rule. Because I’d love nothing more than to partake of a big ole glass of sake and drink every time Henry says Sasha.

  “Did she? That’s awesome.” If I actually played that game, I’d be hammered in no time.

  “Sasha says sake really brings out the flavor of the fish.” I pick up my water and play the sober version just for the hell of it. Sip. “Sasha really knows a lot about wine.” Sip. “Sasha is kind of what you might call an aficionado.” Sip. “Ah, Sasha. Sasha, Sasha, Sasha.” Sip, sip, sip, sip.

  “Will you excuse me? I need to use the ladies’ room.” I stand up from the table.

  “Again? Are you okay?”

  “Just a lot of water.” I point to my empty glass. The water version of the Sasha game is very hydrating. “I’ll be right back.”

  In the bathroom, I’m midpee when my phone starts chiming like crazy. I wait until I’m out of the stall before grabbing it from my purse.

  Jenn: Henry just texted me. He says you’re on a date!!!

  Jenn: He says it’s going AWESOME!!!!

  Jenn: I am seriously freaking the fuck out. I knew you two would be great together.

  I actually search the bathroom for hidden cameras. This has got to be a joke.

  Me: Don’t get too excited. I think he may not be over Sasha yet.

  I’m not gonna pretend with her that this date is something more than it is. All that will do is cause more headaches and drama.

  Jenn: He mentioned Sasha?

  Me: Only about 1000 times. Sorry. :(

  Jenn: Ignore that. He’s probably just rusty. He says that he really likes u and that u guys are hitting it off. Do u like him?

  Me: He’s nice.

  Jenn: No!!!!! I know what that means but TRUST me. He’s probably just getting it all out of his system. You need to give him another chance.

  Me: IDK.

  Jenn: OMG ur not gonna bail on the cabin are you?

  Me: I thought there were no strings?

  Jenn: This isn’t a string. You’re coming as my friend.

  Fuck.

  No strings my ass. I’m nothing but a tangle of knots made up of fucking strings. If I go to the cabin, it could get weird, especially if Henry thinks this date is going well and that we are “hitting it off” like Jenn says.

  But Jenn has become a really good friend. One I’d hate to lose, since I don’t have many.

  Fuck.

  Well at least if I go, she can just see for herself that it’s not a match.

  Jenn: Please don’t bail. Please come this weekend.

  Me: I’ll be there.

  I Didn’t See That One Coming

  I unzip the travel bag and toss it onto my bed. It should be able to hold enough for three nights. After my date with Henry was a flop, I don’t think I’ll need anything too extravagant to wear over the long weekend anyway.

  The door downstairs slams and two sets of feet come stomping up the stairs to the bedroom right next to mine. Crap, they’re home. I think I left the lights and the TV on downstairs. My brother hates when I do that.

  “You still didn’t give me an answer.” Jax’s voice travels through the thin walls.

  “This is all just too soon. And what about your sister?” Paisley says, and my ears perk up. Wait, why are they talking about me? I kneel on the bed with my head pressed against the wall. “Don’t worry about Remi,” Jax says.

  Worry about Remi? I need to know what they’re talking about. I grab my glass of water from the night table and drain it to use against my ear for better hearing. It makes it worse. Why does that always work on TV? I set the glass down and keep listening.

  “But you can’t just tell her to leave because you want me to move in.”

  “What?” I say out loud, then cover my mouth. They obviously don’t know I’m up here. Because of the lights and TV, they probably figure I’m downstairs.

  “Did you put in for the transfer at work yet?” My brother talks to her in a soothing voice. A transfer and moving in? My God, they’ve only been dating like six months. Why is he so fucking whipped already?

  “No, I don’t think I’m going to transfer.” Paisley lowers her voice, and I have to strain to hear. My ear is pressed so hard against the wall, it actually hurts. “I’m not ready to move in. I haven’t even met your parents yet. This is all too rushed. I can’t. Not now. Not like this.”

  “Paisley, I love you,” my brother says in a gooey voice, and I cover my mouth to suppress a gag. “I know it’s fast, but I hate the idea of you living forty-five minutes away. I want to be there for you if you need anything, especially as it gets closer.”

  Closer? I squint and mouth the word. Closer to what?

  “Jax, I love you too. But I’m not moving in. Not yet anyway,” Paisley tells him, and I’m relieved. I mean, of course I want my brother to be happy, but I also want a place to live.

  I slide off the bed and glance over at the bottle of whiskey I bought them and grab it. Sounds like they could probably use this tonight.

  “Can you just promise me… we… after... the ultrasound?” The bottle nearly falls from my grasp. I quickly slide my hand underneath to keep it from falling.

  No. Impossible. He didn’t say ultrasound, and even if he did, an ultrasound can mean many things. Maybe one of them just has some weird cyst on their foot that needs checking. I press my ear back to listen.

  “Yes, after we make sure everything is okay with the baby and we tell our families, we can talk about it then,” Paisley says.

  Oh my God.

  They’re having a baby.

  My brother and his pharmacist girlfriend, who both work in drugstores that sell condoms, are having a baby. I have to sit.

  This is huge. This is crazy. This is good. This is bad.

  I look down at the bottle of whiskey in my hands.

  This is coming with me.

  Whiskey Chicks—Plural

  I can’t believe I ever gave up whiskey.

  That was so stupid of me. There’s nothing wrong with this stuff. If anything, it’
s pretty fucking awesome. Just like this cabin. Just like Jenn. I need to tell her.

  “I love you,” I say to the best fucking person I have ever met ever. I say it real loud because we’re the only ones here in this huge-ass mansion her family refers to as “the cabin.”

  “I was just going to say the exact same thing,” Jenn yells back.

  No fucking way. We stare at each other in openmouthed disbelief.

  “I think we can like read each other’s minds and shit now,” I say, pointing from my head to hers.

  “Oh my God, I was just going to say that too. We’re so fucking in sync. Eeevery-booody,” she sings as she pours more whiskey into our glasses—at least, some of what she pours makes it into the glasses. She’s clearly drunk. One, because that’s not *NSync. And two, because she is sooooo fucking drunk.

  Me, I’m okay. I grab my phone.

  Me: Pood if happy. Snored is milk. BSB rules!

  “I just texted my brother that I know about the baby and that I’m happy for them. I’m gonna be an aunt. I’m so happy for me.”

  “Me too. You’re the best,” Jenn gushes and my phone pings back a reply. “Is that him? What did he say?”

  Jax: WTF? Are you drunk?

  “Aw, he says he’s happy for me too. He says I’m gonna be a good aunt.” I drop my phone to use two hands to hold the glass Jenn hands me, and take a gulp. “You’re really, really good at hair, but you could also be a bartender.” I take one hand away from the glass and place it on her arm so she knows I’m serious. “I mean it.”

  “Thank you.” Jenn leans over and hugs me, the drink in her hands spilling down my back. “And you are going to be the best aunt ever. I wish you were my aunt. Oh my God.” She pulls away to look at me. “You could be my aunt. If you marry my brother, you could be my aunt.”

  “I know, and I really want to be your aunt, but I can’t because”—I drop my head solemnly—“I don’t think I love Henry.”