by Croft, Rose
“Tito reminded me that I was born into the Los Malos family, and they were my obligation for life. He glanced at Eric and said…” She swallowed hard and squeezed her eyes closed.
“Tell me what he said.”
“He said he would take his life if I didn’t do what he wanted.”
“Motherfucker!” She jumped when I slammed the steering wheel.
“I agreed to do anything if he would leave you and Eric alone. He followed me home and watched and waited outside our house to make sure I did what I promised.”
I slammed the steering wheel again. Anger management was never my best suit, and I was at my threshold of things that added fuel to the fire. That fucker threatened Sofí and Eric. That fucker was at my house. “Is he the one who hurt you?” My voice was as rough as sandpaper, as I tried to hold on to the remaining thread of sanity. I already knew the goddamn answer.
“Yes,” she said quietly—One simple word that severed my thread.
I opened the car door. “Get in the house.”
“What are you doing?”
“Go inside and stay there.”
Sofía knew my train of thought. “Don’t go after Tito.”
“Why?” Was she trying to protect this lowlife cousin of hers?
“Because I killed him.”
Sofía stepped out of the building and shielded her eyes from the afternoon sun, scanning the parking lot. It was Friday afternoon, and I’d spent the whole week popping in on Eric’s classroom to see for myself what happened in class. What she did. How she interacted with Eric. If she was telling the truth that she wasn’t trying to influence Eric in some way.
What I did learn was that she was damn good at this job. She cared. It didn’t take long to know she was genuinely enjoying working with not only Eric but with all the children. She tried her best not to show impartiality. Sofía had such patience and kindness that I was in awe of anyone who could do this on a daily basis. I loved my son and enjoyed the time we spent together, but that was one child and he was mine. However, the thought of handling twenty-two students who weren’t my own all day, every day, was not something I could handle. No thanks.
Sadly, I also couldn’t help following her every move when I was around her. I knew her schedule and watched as she walked to the bus stop and waited until it showed up. I’d texted her earlier to meet me in the parking lot.
She spotted my car as I leaned against the door. I rose up slowly as she approached. “Get in.” I slid into my seat as she climbed in beside me. We had about half an hour before kids started filing out of the building.
“You wanted to talk?” She raised her eyes in question.
How we went from fucking to talking was beyond me. Although my dick didn’t like it, my brain and pride were still making rational decisions. Kind of. As soon as Eric was in the equation, I knew I had to separate myself from this scenario.
I cleared my throat thinking of the words I wanted to say. “I need to talk to you before this goes any further or I swear to God I’ll cut all ties.”
I was the biggest fool in the world. I knew it. I was potentially taking a costly risk here. All because I couldn’t stomach the hurt and pain she was suffering. As professional as she tried to be in front of all the students, it was obvious to me how she watched Eric like a protective mother. I would be a liar if I didn’t have to control my emotions as I watched Eric and Sofía interact as natural as two people could be. I couldn’t stop the nagging notion in my brain that kept telling me we would’ve been a happy family if Tito had never seen her that day in the park.
Then again, shit happened and I still couldn’t come to terms that she didn’t ask for my help. She was also connected to Los Malos, although I could sympathize with her story. In her mind, she had no choice. In my heart, I was close to believing her because she’d been so genuine around Eric. I remembered how she was with him when he was a baby. She was a hands-on mother and overly protective.
“If you want this to work. If you want to continue to see Eric, you will do it on my terms.”
“I’ll do anything.” Her eyes were like liquid aqua velvet.
I nodded. “Swear to me, you won’t tell Eric who you are until we discuss this and feel the time is right. I don’t want to have to draw up a legal document, but I will if I have to.” The words that came out made me sound like an asshole, but I needed to protect Eric.
“I won’t.”
“From now on, you must be completely transparent with me, Sofía. If there’s any more trouble, you come to me.”
“I will.”
“One more thing.” I inhaled. “Are you in this for the long haul?” I hated how I even needed to ask her this. “Don’t you dare fuck around with Eric’s feelings if you can’t commit to him.”
“How could you even ask that?” Sofía gazed at me like I’d been the one to punch her in the ribs.
“Just looking out for Eric, and your history is a little suspect, wouldn’t you agree?”
“You can say anything you want about me Emilio, okay? I get it. Maybe I didn’t make the right decision that day, but when you have a gun to your head or should I say your child’s head, it makes your choice that much easier.” She leaned in and growled. “By the way, never, ever doubt my love for Eric and what I’d do to protect him. I did the only thing I thought was best for him at the time.” Her eyes glittered with an angry possessiveness like a lioness defending her cub. For some reason, I strangely believed her.
I heard the bell sound and students were soon lining up at their designated spots to be picked up. Sofía’s cheeks were flushed, and she grabbed the door handle about to bolt from the car. “The bus will be here soon.”
Before I knew it, I reached out and stopped her. “Wait. Stay here. I’ll get Eric and then take you home.” Lately, it seemed I was her mode of transportation, but I hated her having to take a bus to get from point A to point B.
She sat stonily with the slight twitch of her chin. I knew she was still angry, but she’d stay if only to see Eric.
Emilio
Instead of taking Sofía to Janis’s house, the person she was currently living with, we went to get ice cream. Eric was quick to remind me as soon as he ran to the car that I’d promised him ice cream for winning a bet on a soccer game we’d watched the other day. His team won, and I owed him. No, I wasn’t promoting gambling to my son, dammit.
Sofí was as happy as a smiley face emoji when she saw Eric.
We sat on benches outside the parlor and ate our two-scoop waffle cones. “Ow! My nose is burning,” Eric cried out after inhaling a big bite of Cookies and Cream. My boy could hoover some damn food like every other Mendoza in the family.
“Are you okay?” Sofí hovered over him.
“It’s just brain freeze. He’s all right,” I responded eyeing my son who was milking the attention from her. Didn’t blame him.
Eric was soon smiling as I suspected. “Wanna try mine, Sofí?”
She leaned and took a small bite and groaned in ecstasy. “So good.”
“I know. Let me try yours,” he agreed, and she held out her pistachio ice cream as Eric lapped at it and tilted his head comparing the taste to his. “It’s okay. Not as good as mine.” The familiarity between Eric and Sofía left me conflicted, but damn if I didn’t feel my heartstrings tug. She better not be yanking his chain, but something deep inside me knew she wasn’t.
“Can I go swing?” Eric pleaded holding his half-eaten cone. We were out back of the restaurant that had benches and a small playground.
“Sure. Throw your cone away, first,” I said, and we watched him scurry off to the nearby swings.
Sofí sat quietly as she watched Eric with a pensive expression on her face. She’d always been somewhat of a reserved, reflective person. The complete opposite of me.
“What are you thinking about?”
Her brows burrowed as she bit into her cone. “Utopia.”
“Utopia? That’s random, don’t you think?”
She smiled a secretive smile and side-eyed me. “Not really. When I was a little girl living with my uncle, I used to daydream about my own happy world that helped me escape my…” Her words trailed off, and I nearly crushed my remaining waffle cone when I thought about Sofí growing up in that environment. She shook her head ruefully. “I was always a dreamer.”
I wiped my mouth to keep from saying some downer shit, and keep the conversation positive. “Tell me about your Utopia, Sofí.”
She took one last glance at Eric who’d already made a friend, and they were taking turns on the swing. Then, she leveled me with her eyes. “Well, there was a beach with the bluest water you’ve ever seen surrounded by plenty of coconut and banana trees so I would never starve. Not too far off the beach, I could walk to my own private natural spring with a beautiful waterfall so I had fresh water to drink. And all the animals had a safe haven, too.” She listed every animal she could think of.
I sat and stared like a fool, entranced by the innocent fantasy world she’d created to escape her misery. “So, you thought of every animal, huh, even the sea turtle.”
She nodded in agreement. “Even the sea turtle.”
“What about a hermit crab?” I teased.
“Oh, definitely a hermit crab.” We both chuckled.
As our laughter died, I asked, “What about people? Did they live in this world, too?”
“Of course. My mother and brother.”
I acknowledged her solemnly.
She studied the remaining piece of her half-eaten cone measuring her words. She said softly, “Being here with you and Eric feels a lot like my ultimate world, too.”
Feelings were running rampant inside me, but I chased them down. “Uh, look.” I ran a hand through my hair, knowing I was being somewhat impulsive, again. “I want to help you find your own place.”
“You don’t need to help me. I’ll make it work.”
“No. Listen to me.” I couldn’t allow her to flail around like a lost waif. If she agreed to this, I would help her get back on her feet. I had both connections and money. I’d given this a lot of thought since she told me the truth. “I’ve already found a place. It’s not far from here or my office. I invested in a new condo. We’ve already leased out a few spots. If you ever needed anything, I’d be nearby.”
I didn’t realize my fists were balled on the table, until she reached out and covered one of my hands, easing the tension. How could something so trivial seem like everything? “You don’t have to do this for me. I can take care of myself.”
The sad fact was I wanted to do it for her. “Leave that to me to decide. Just come look at the place, okay?”
She acquiesced and leaned in close laying her palm on my cheek. Her eyes glittered with unshed tears. “I would die for you and Eric. Please know that.”
I gripped her hand tight, fighting her words that seemed to burrow deep in my soul. “Everything will be fine, Sofí. Don’t be dramatic. But know this… all I hold dear in this world are my son, my family, and my word. I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt, but if you fuck us over, I will ruin you.”
Life was imperfect, no doubt, and I typically tried not to indulge in those imperfections and screw up my life. I truly wasn’t a glutton for punishment. I wasn’t. Not deliberately. Had I made poor decisions in the past? Of course. Human nature and all. However, as I sat around in the lobby of the condo with Eric waiting to meet Sofía, I couldn’t help questioning whether my life was about to take a nosedive off a cliff with my decision. Only time would tell.
It was the following weekend, and I brought Eric with me knowing he wanted to see her again and also loved visiting my buildings.
Since I was slowly coming to grips with Sofía being in Eric’s life, I didn’t see any reason why he couldn’t see her. As long as I was around to make sure everything went well. I didn’t know how to approach the subject of telling him she was his mother. I wanted to see more of Sofía in action with him, and then I’d make a decision.
The only thing that might be dicey was my behavior around her. It’d been several weeks since I’d touched that sweet body and that need wasn’t ever going away unless I was six feet under. Or if she took off again. Sadly, even then it could be questionable.
Eric and I waited downstairs in the lobby. We’d been here for about twenty minutes. I was about to fire off a text to see where the hell she was, cursing myself for not picking her up personally.
“There she is!” Eric hopped out of one of the leather loungers and ran to the glass entry doors waving frantically. Eric was crazy about her, I knew, which made me both cautious and… another emotion I wasn’t quite ready to address.
She passed through the door and kneeled down on his level. “Hi, Eric.” Her smile brightened up the room and made me believe anything was possible. Sofía stood up and took Eric’s hand in hers and slung the large duffel bag over her shoulder. Her belongings. She had on black jeans with holes and a T-shirt with a hoodie. Her hair was down, long tri-colored locks in shades of brown fell down to the middle of her back and a few strands curled around her breasts. She was innocently dressed, and I still had to will myself not to get a stiffy in front of my son. Dammit, our son.
“I wanna see Sofí’s new place!” Eric shouted and ran to the elevator doors pushing the panel button repeatedly.
“Okay, okay. You only need to push it one time, son.” Sofía approached me, and I slipped the strap of the duffel bag off her shoulder. “I’ll get that for you.” I assured her the condo was already furnished, when she said she didn’t have any furniture. It was… because I furnished it. I madly scrambled to have a crew come in and get it ready for her.
We filed into the elevator, and I had to be quick and reach Eric’s hand before he pushed every button on the panel. “Just push five, okay?”
He nodded confidently. “Got it.” The elevator took off and Eric jumped around in delight.
Sofía’s hauntingly, beautiful eyes stared up at the numbers. I could tell she was nervous. I laid my hand on her lower back, giving her my reassurance. I could feel her body relax. It always moved me knowing I had that effect on her.
We exited the elevator. “Which one is hers, Papá?”
“Look for the one that says five zero three,” I said, and Eric found it easily. It wasn’t hard to find, but my boy knew his numbers.
I keyed into the door and pushed it open. “Here it is.” I glanced around, freaking ecstatic the place looked like a showroom because I damn well paid for this and it was one of the bigger spaces in the building. I peered down at her as she turned and took everything in. Her jaw hung slack as she looked around.
“Emilio,” she breathed in awe. “It’s… How much is the rent here?”
I slipped off the duffel bag setting it on the hardwood. “Nothing you have to worry about.” She didn’t need to know these condos ran for over five grand a month to lease. “It’s covered.”
She side-eyed me and shook her head.
“Look, you can see the flying horse!” Eric called out standing by the floor-to-ceiling windows by the outdoor balcony patio. The view of the city didn’t suck either. “Come here, Sofí.” He pressed his nose to the glass.
“It’s a Pegasus,” she answered and quickly stepped over to Eric to indulge him, and they both pointed as they stared at all the surroundings around them. She bent down behind him and wrapped an arm around his shoulder.
“Oh, let’s go out there.” Eric motioned to the balcony.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Sofía said.
“Please.”
She took his hand. “Maybe later, but listen to me, Eric.” Sofí again leaned down to his level and tipped his chin. She always seemed to speak to him with respect. “You can never go out on the balcony by yourself. Only with one of us, okay?” She was already assuming there would be more visits here with Eric. As though remembering I was there, she glanced at me. “I mean…”
“She’s right, Eric.
” I had reservations, but I couldn’t disagree with what she said. My son was very active and curious and needed to know going out on the balcony was dangerous. I didn’t want to address what would happen in the future. Instead, I suggested, “Let’s check out the rest of this place.”
The condo had a living room, dining room, kitchen with state-of-the-art appliances, two bedrooms, and two bathrooms. After the tour, we all sat down on the oversized sofa. I clicked on the flat-screen remote. “Even the TV has been set up with every channel imaginable.” Again, it was good to have connections and having the television set up was always my top priority. I’m a dude. Sue me.
I found one of the sports channels. “Look, Eric, the European Championship is on.” Eric’s favorite soccer team was playing in the finals.
“Yes!” Eric kicked back with eyes glued to the screen. Most kids loved cartoons. My son lived for soccer matches.
Five minutes in, Eric eyed Sofía. “Do you have anything to eat? I’m hungry.”
Dammit. I forgot my boy could eat at any time of the day, and it was past noon. “Eric, we’ll get something to eat soon.”
“I think I have something.” Sofía jumped up and leaned over her bag and came up with a pack of crackers.
“You always carry around food wherever you go?” I teased.
“Yeah, in case of emergencies. You never know where you’ll end up and need to be prepared.” She opened the package and handed it to Eric, while I sat still, wondering if storing food was an old habit from some of the fucked-up shit she’d experienced.
“I love these,” he said before shoving a cracker in his mouth.
“Me too.” She tousled his hair and walked off toward the kitchen.
“I think there should be complimentary bottles of water in the fridge.” I stood up as a reason to have a word with Sofía. She was opening and closing cabinet doors checking out the storage space. I noticed there were plates and glasses already stocked. Good. The company I used covered all their bases, and that’s why we used them.