Primitivo

by Croft, Rose

  The furrow in her brow didn’t escape me. “Hey, you okay?” I asked. She seemed restless, on edge.

  She propped a hip against the counter and nodded her head. “You didn’t have to do this for me. I mean, I’m very grateful, but you don’t need to take me on as your next charity case.”

  “I already told you why I did.” She wasn’t far off the mark. I did feel so much guilt about her situation even though I should be cautious of her.

  “I know. It’s just… I can never pay you back.”

  “You can pay me back by keeping your word that you care for Eric.”

  “I do care for Eric. I love him with all my heart,” she vowed and seemed hurt I would ever doubt her. She took a step toward me. “And what about you?”

  “Yeah, they scored!” Eric yelled from the living room.

  I crooked my head his way and glanced back at her. “What about me?”

  She sighed. “I know this is hard for you to wrap your head around. I can see it in your eyes when you look at me.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and tilted my head. “What do you think you see?”

  She smiled a bittersweet smile. “You watch me when I’m around Eric like you can’t fully trust me.”

  “With good reason, Sofía.”

  “But you have such a compassionate heart that you’re trying to give me a chance. Sometimes, I think you hate yourself for allowing this. You hate yourself for being around me. I know you do, and I don’t blame you.”

  I couldn’t argue with her. She was on point. I did question myself constantly. “Your assumption would be accurate,” I said quietly and pinched the bridge of my nose. “I hate the fact I can’t seem to let you go. It fucking infuriated me when I saw you with Eric for the first time at the carnival. It makes me question myself as a man that I would give you a second chance with him. I hate the fact that I don’t hate it the more I see you and Eric together. The more I see us together. Most of all, I hate myself for being weak.”

  She came forward and folded herself into me. My hands automatically slid down her back. It seemed like holding and comforting her was the new norm. “You’re the strongest person I know, Papi.” Her words threatened to deconstruct the imaginary wall I’d carefully built. “You’re a wonderful father and a good man.” She touched her lips to the center of my chest, and I swear my heart pulsed.

  Without thought I lifted her chin up bringing her lips closer to mine. “Sofía…” I needed her like I needed water or maybe a bullet in my head, but I was willing to curse myself to perdition. It’d been too long without her.

  “Are you gonna kiss, Sofí?” My son’s voice rang through the air, and Sofía and I quickly pulled apart like we’d been caught doing something illegal.

  I exhaled and got my shit together. “No. I wasn’t. And what the hell do you know about kissing?” I’d never brought another woman around my son since I was engaged to Belinda, and Eric had been too young to remember.

  His eyes widened as he cupped his mouth. “You said hell!” Eric was quick to pick up on bad words… and very quick to repeat them.

  “Sorry, son, but you don’t need to repeat what I say.” I shook my head. “Who’s been talking to you about kissing?”

  “This girl, Karla in my class said she was my girlfriend and that girlfriends and boyfriends kiss.” He shifted on his feet and tapped his index finger on his chin, thinking. “There’s also Victoria…”

  “Two girls at school?” I looked at Sofía, and she nodded her head in confirmation. “He’s very popular in class among the girls.”

  I groaned. Oh, brother. “Eric, you’re too young to have a girlfriend.”

  “I know. I told them I wasn’t interested in having a girlfriend because I needed to stay focused on soccer.” He had such a serious look on his face when he said it, and I had to fight my lips from curling up. Sofía coughed awkwardly into her hand.

  “That’s good, son. You need to keep your eye on the prize.” We fist bumped. “Look, why don’t we get lunch, and then we’ll take Sofí to the grocery store.”

  “Can we get pizza?” Eric pleaded with hands folded in prayer.

  “Pizza sounds good to me,” Sofía said.

  “Pizza it is.” Here’s to eating crap today, but it would be worth it.

  Sofía

  I thought the night of the carnival was one of the best days of my life, but today may have surpassed it. We went to a pizza buffet, and Emilio grumbled about how the food tasted like cardboard but was Eric’s favorite place to go. There were games, too. So, of course, we spent two hours there stuffed with tasteless pizza and had the best time playing games with our son. Every minute was worth it.

  I was still beaming later as we stood in line to pay at the grocery store, until my phone chimed. I pulled out my cell glancing over the texts. A chill coursed down my spine. Soon, it was yanked out of my hand as Emilio scanned over my phone:

  Tito: I’m back bitch.

  Tito: And coming for you!

  Emilio’s face grew darker as he read. His eyes held an unnerving glint, the only subtle, dangerous sign he allowed because we were in public, and Eric was here. Instead of giving it back, he pocketed the phone in his jeans. My hand wavered between us while his arms crossed in set determination—a silent warning. My hand fell beside me in equally silent consent.

  He pushed the cart out with me holding Eric’s hand as we crossed the parking lot to his car. I helped Eric get strapped in his seat while Emilio unloaded groceries in the back.

  “Sofía, can you come here and help me?” Emilio’s voice was low and level.

  I went to the back of the SUV and Emilio asked, “Do you have any important information on your phone. Contacts. Anything important?”

  “No. Only your number and work.” I didn’t have any friends. The only other numbers I needed were from Eric’s school and the mentor program.

  “Good.” He pushed the button on the hatch and the back door lowered until it closed. He dropped the phone on the ground and crushed it repeatedly under his shoe. “Get in, and I’ll be right back.”

  “Why?” I watched in shock as he bent down to retrieve my mangled cell.

  “Get in,” he repeated calmly. “I’ll explain later.”

  I picked up my jaw and scooted around to the passenger seat and slid in and watched as Emilio took the cart back up to the storefront and casually dropped my cell in the trash as he passed by.

  He slid into his seat as cool as can be and adjusted his rearview mirror. “We ready?”

  By the time we arrived at Emilio’s, Eric’s head drooped to the side, asleep in his seat. Emilio killed the ignition as we sat in his driveway. “Here, use this phone and Monday we’ll get you a new one.” He pulled an older cell out of his glove box, and I didn’t miss the Glock he had in there, too. I wasn’t surprised. I’d lived with crazy, and apparently Emilio wasn’t one to shy away from danger. We’d left the store and returned to my condo, and he’d told me to grab some things to stay overnight at his place. I didn’t want to ask questions in front of Eric who cheered in excitement that I was coming over for a sleepover.

  “Why?” I asked quietly. I didn’t need to elaborate.

  “He could’ve been tracking you on your phone, and I don’t want to take any chances. I know you’ll be safe here.” He opened the door. “Can you take Eric inside, and I’ll bring in the groceries, okay?”

  I nodded and moved around to the back, carefully easing Eric out of his car seat. Eric wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled into my neck. I think I even felt a little drool on my skin, but I would savor it. My baby was in my arms, and Emilio trusted me to be around him.

  I passed through the open garage and glanced back at Emilio who had his head down with thumbs moving over his phone. Eric stirred in my arms and I strode inside through the garage door passing through a utility room to the kitchen. The sound of rapid fire filled the room, and I automatically ducked down to the floor with Eric cradled beneath my body. A t
rained response I’d learned early on in life.

  Nothing shattered around me and I heard, “Fuck yeah!” coming from the living room. I glanced down at Eric who was staring at me. His cheeks rosy from sleep and hair mussed. “It’s Tío Yovani playing his game.” Then he added wide-eyed and serious, “He said fuck. That’s a bad word.”

  I exhaled with a shaky smile relieved we weren’t being assaulted with AK-47s and could tell Eric was pushing boundaries with curse words. Emilio threw out bad words like his favorite adjectives. However, I still had to calm my heart. “I know, baby, you shouldn’t say it either.”

  “I don’t. Just letting you know.” He glanced over his shoulder as I slowly stood up with him in my arms. “Can I go play?”

  “Sure.”

  Yovani must’ve heard us and he called out, “S’up, little man!”

  Eric ran over to his tío. Yovani twisted his head with a cursory glance not missing a beat or acting surprised. “Hey.” He casually nodded and turned back to his game.

  Eric plopped down on the couch and grabbed the other remote on the coffee table. “I wanna play, Tío.”

  “Everything okay?” Emilio strolled in with an armful of groceries. I had flashbacks of how we used to do mundane things like going to the grocery store together. Emilio was always there to help.

  I reached out to take one of the bags out of his arms. “It’s perfect.”

  “I can grill some hamburgers tonight.”

  “Yes, that would be great.”

  Emilio glanced over at the sofa. “Yovani, is that all you’ve been doing all day? Get your ass off the couch and help me.”

  “Papá said ass!” Eric was quick to interject.

  Emilio chuckled under his breath setting the groceries down. “He doesn’t miss a thing, does he?”

  “No.” I laughed relishing in this time we had together. It was like we were locked in a time capsule.

  Emilio stepped over to me by the sink. “I love it when you laugh.” He cupped my face and kissed my forehead as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Then, he looked like he regretted what he did. He flatlined his lips. “I’ll go get the rest of the stuff.” He spun around leaving me in a ball of confusion. Yovani passed by shaking his head.

  “Grill’s going out back,” Emilio said as he passed through the kitchen. I cut up the sides and put the frozen French fries on a pan. It was like riding a bike again how easy it was for me to navigate around the kitchen. This whole day was like living out a fantasy. I couldn’t stop the negative thoughts lurking in my mind as though something dire was surely going to happen. You’re just being paranoid, Sofí.

  The doorbell sounded as Emilio came in from the back and rushed to the door. I heard muffled voices.

  “We’re making hamburgers,” Emilio said as his cousin Adrian walked beside him. “Adrian’s here.”

  Emilio’s cousin was wearing a dress shirt with sleeves rolled up and navy pinstriped slacks. He glanced around the kitchen with a never-get-overly-excited attitude. “This is very domestic.” Adrian always seemed to have a slight smirk on his face, and I never knew whether he was lacing his comments with sarcasm or being sincere.

  “It’s called making a normal dinner, primo. Life’s not always about fine dining and cocktail parties,” Emilio said as he pulled out three beers from the fridge and popped the tops. He handed me a bottle and directed one bottle-filled hand at his cousin. “What’s with the Armani suit on Saturday?”

  Adrian took the bottle and scoffed. “This isn’t a suit. It’s part of Dior’s new casual line.”

  “What up, primoooo!” Yovani called from the back door with Eric following behind him. Both were sweaty from playing soccer in the backyard. Eric ran straight to Adrian and jumped into his arms. For someone who seemed vain and loved his designer wear, he wasn’t the least bit concerned about getting his clothing soiled. He had Eric in a bear hug.

  “Did you know Sofí is spending the night here?” Eric asked excitedly. “I’m having my first sleepover.”

  “She is?” Adrian shot a quizzical glance at Emilio. Yovani ducked his head with his hand covering his eyes like this whole scenario was some kind of bad train wreck in the making.

  Emilio took a long pull off his beer. “Yeah, her condo needed to be sprayed for bugs, and she’s staying in the guest room tonight.” He made a point to stress those words.

  “I bet she is,” Adrian remarked with a sarcastic lift of his lips once again making an appearance. Yovani ran two fingers over his mouth, fighting a smile.

  “Let’s go check on the grill and sit outside.” Emilio led me with him. “I’m losing brain cells talking to those idiots.”

  Later, Emilio, Adrian, and I were sitting around the wrought iron picnic table watching Yovani and Eric kick the soccer ball around the backyard.

  “Emilio,” Adrian began. “I know you love to spend time with me, but let’s cut to the chase. Why did you invite me here?”

  Emilio sighed and thumbed the label on his bottle. “I need your help.”

  Emilio

  When I’d seen the texts from the asshole who was about to be formerly known as Tito, it was all I could do not to storm out of the grocery store and tear my ass down to his house and kill him. The more time I spent around Sofía, the more I understood her circumstances. Who knew if he was tracking her every move?

  This was supposedly her family. Her father was a piece of shit. Her uncle and cousin were subhuman. And, her mother’s story was a mystery. She spoke about her with some kind of reverence like she was perfect. What I did know about ES-22 members was that men treated women like worthless possessions, and if Sofía’s mother was seeing another man, it was more than likely she’d been murdered by one of her father’s men. They lived by some ancient code both barbaric and unbelievable in this day and age, but that’s how these assholes with their so-called power operated. Didn’t I already experience it through all the years I knew Rafael?

  Who knew if her brother was still alive? It wasn’t uncommon for people from Central America to flee to the States, running away from dire situations. More and more children were coming to this country unsupervised without parents or families because they were orphaned. Sadly, it wasn’t unusual for siblings to get separated during the journey. As far as I knew, Oscar could’ve been kidnapped or even worse… killed.

  “Primo, you know I wear many hats, but at the end of the day, I’m a problem-solver. You did the right thing by reaching out.” Adrian clasped his hands together between his legs and leaned forward with a solemn look on his face. Why did I feel like I was on the Dr. Phil show? Adrian was intelligent. By far, the overachiever in the family. Well, wait, his brother, Eduardo was a doctor, so both my cousins took the prize for going the traditional route to college and getting a respectable job.

  I thought about calling my brother Vince, but I was cautious because that fucker had ice in his veins when it came to Sofía. I knew soon enough I would have to face the music with him, but we were both so damn hard-headed it would’ve ended up in blows if he said something to piss me off. I didn’t know where all of this was going between Sofía and me, but I wasn’t ready to discuss this situation with Vince.

  If you pushed through the cocky bullshit persona of my cousin, you would know his heart was in the right place. He’d initially studied criminal law in college and later decided to focus on commercial law. Hence, one of the reasons we were so successful in this venture. However, Adrian’s aspirations outstretched only acquiring properties. He was deeply involved in city politics and had made many connections over the years with civil rights’ leaders, city council members, the mayor, and law enforcement. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if he ran for public office one day.

  “What’s wrong? Is there something going on with her probation?” Adrian pressed. “I personally spoke to the judge before her hearing, and he assured me he’d go easy on her.”

  Sofía’s eyes shot to mine and her mouth formed an O. “You had a hand i
n this? You bribed the judge?”

  Dammit! My cousin also didn’t have a fucking filter sometimes. I scowled at him.

  Adrian quickly backpedaled. “Not exactly. Since you were a first-time offender, it was more likely you would face probation and community service. The judge happens to be a good friend of mine.” He smoothed it over but didn’t have any qualms about throwing out whom he was connected to. Side note observation.

  If I were honest, I couldn’t live with myself if Eric’s mother would’ve served time. When she told me she was held at gunpoint and subjected to Los Malos’ treatment, it was hard for me to come to grips with it. Sofía was a smart girl, she’d been passionate about finishing school and being a teacher. She’d been driven and borderline obsessive about being the best mother she could be when Eric was born, and I couldn’t get over the bruises that marred her body. All lines were blurred in this scenario.

  “Her cousin heads up ES-22 here,” I said quietly, not wanting my son to overhear something he shouldn’t. I glanced over at him as Yovani chased him around the yard, both of them playing with abandon. “He’s the one we need to focus on.”

  Adrian nodded, not fazed by anything. My primo had a poker face he’d practiced schooling for years. He turned to Sofía. “I’m here to help, sweetheart.” This was his smooth way of talking to women, to keep them at ease. “But I need you to tell me everything you know…”

  “We’ll handle this,” Adrian said confidently like he had his own team on the situation.

  I walked Adrian out to his car. Sofía had volunteered to give Eric a bath, and who the hell knew what Yovani was doing? He threw out deuces to Adrian and hooked it upstairs. As far as I knew that joker was probably hitting up a girl on an online video game. A freaky booty chat.

  We stopped in front of Adrian’s Tesla. “I’m not here to give you moral advice or question you,” he began. His voice clearly indicated that’s exactly what he wanted to do. “But do you know what you’re doing?” He’d heard Sofía’s story. It was jacked-up. However, I knew he was looking out for my and Eric’s best interest. At any moment if I thought this situation was foul, I could seek legal action. I could’ve pursued custody or a restraining order against her, but I didn’t. I couldn’t locate her before, and honestly, I never wanted to do it either. Maybe I was a fool.