Addicted To Him

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Addicted To Him Page 37

by Monica Murphy

Maybe that will be a mistake, but I’ve come too far to back down now. I’m going to show everyone that Eli is mine, and we’re together.

  When I was with Ellie at the pizza place, I couldn’t find the right time or words to break it to her about Eli and I being a couple. I should’ve. I know she deserves to find out from me first versus someone else, but it was hard. And just thinking about telling her makes me nervous. I don’t know why I feel like she’ll judge me when she finds out, considering she’s never judged me before. I only want her approval. And support. I’ll need her support more than anything. I know some people won’t react well to this.

  At all.

  I’m not so sure how I feel about this either. The entire situation makes me nervous. Edgy.

  Giving up on him, I’m about to crawl into bed when I receive a text from Eli. My heart feels ready to leap from my chest at seeing the words he just sent me.

  Meet me in your backyard.

  Giddiness fills me and I smile as I type out a response.

  Are you here?

  Eli: Yeah. Come see me.

  Me: You don’t want to climb up the wall again?

  Eli: Fuck no. Get your pretty ass down here.

  Hmm. I tap my finger against my lips. I decide to put together a little surprise. The idea has been brewing in my head since I got home, and now I’m like…why not?

  So I shed all of my clothes save my panties, slip on a thick, short robe my parents got me for Christmas, and slip out of my room, heading down the stairs.

  We could go in the hot tub for a little bit. I’m sure Eli will go for it. Not only will he want to see me naked, but maybe the hot water will feel good on his tired muscles.

  Huh. More than anything, he’ll just want to see me naked.

  I tiptoe through the quiet kitchen and unlock the back door, sneaking outside. I can already see Eli. He’s standing by the pool, on the darkest side beneath a tree, so it’s not obvious there’s a stranger in our backyard if someone glanced out one of the windows. When he sees me, he smiles, and I press my index finger against my lips as I approach him, indicating he should be quiet.

  He remains silent, his eyes dancing with mischief. I realize he’s wearing my favorite hoodie. The one he stole from me at football camp—well, I suppose I gave it to him. Reluctantly. I always wondered what happened to it.

  When I get closer, I drop my finger from my lips and that’s his cue to start talking.

  “What in the world do you have on?” he asks as his appreciative gaze sweeps over me.

  “Undo the belt and find out,” I say as I stop just in front of him. I don’t know what it is about Eli, but he makes me feel bold. Confident. The way he looks at me, the things he says…more than anything, he makes me feel powerful.

  And that’s addictive.

  He reaches out, his long fingers catching the end of the cloth belt. He tugs me closer to him, undoing the belt quickly, and when the fabric parts, his eyes go wide before they lift to mine. “You’re practically naked.”

  “So observant,” I tease, stepping into his hands. They slide over my waist, igniting sparks on my bare skin and making me shiver. “Want to go in the hot tub?”

  “You’ve got a hot tub?” He lifts his head, glancing around the yard. “Hell yeah. Let’s go.”

  I wrap my hand around his nape and guide his face down to mine. “Kiss me first.”

  There’s no hesitation. His mouth lands on mine, and the kiss turns hungry in an instant. A little dirty. He’s got one hand on my breast and the other on my butt. I scoot closer, molding my body to his, grateful that he’s here. In my arms. Showing me how much he missed me.

  “I think I’ve created a monster,” he murmurs against my lips at one point as I rub my body against his. “Good thing I brought a condom. Pretty sure you’re down for the sex thing.”

  “Just like you always are,” I tease him.

  He touches my face. My hair. His gaze meets mine, and his eyes are dark. Serious. “I only feel that way about you.”

  The sincerity in his voice almost breaks me, and I don’t understand why. I’m suddenly on the verge of tears. “I love you.”

  “I love you—”

  “What the fuck is going on here?”

  Oh God.

  It’s Jake.

  We both turn, me going for my robe belt and tying it hastily. Jake is standing only a few feet away from us, his face full of rage as he stares us down.

  Well. Stares Eli down.

  “What are you doing here?” he asks Eli.

  Eli throws up his hands, one of those cheesy grins on his face. “Hey, hey. Chill out, bro.”

  “Fuck you, bro.” My brother’s gaze meets mine. “So now you’re just having him come over here, sneaking him into our backyard? What the hell, Ava? Did you two just do it in the hot tub?”

  “We were about to,” Eli starts, and I smack his arm, glaring at him when he looks my way.

  “None of your business,” I tell Jake, trying to sound dignified, though I don’t feel that way. Nope, I’m utterly embarrassed that he caught us together.

  A few more minutes and he definitely would’ve caught us doing it in the hot tub. Now that would’ve been humiliating.

  “See the funny thing is this—it is my business. You’re my sister.” Jake points at me as he comes toward us. I can feel Eli grow tense. “And he’s just the asshole who’s using you to get to me.” He points at Eli.

  “That’s not true,” I start, but Jake talks right over me.

  “And I’ve been putting up with your shit for a long time,” he says to Eli. “All your shit-talking and the social media posts calling me out. Acting like you were going to get out on that football field and kick my ass. Well guess what, asswipe? It didn’t happen. You and your boys fucking suck. You’re nothing but a bunch of pathetic losers.”

  Eli’s expression gets tighter and tighter. So does Jake’s.

  “Where’s the big man now, huh?” Jake comes even closer. Eli gently pushes me out of the way, and I gape at him. I gape at the both of them. Tension swirls in the air, so thick I could almost choke on it. They look ready to fight. “You come over here to lie in wait so you can fuck me up?”

  They are literally in each other’s faces. Jake is a smidge taller. Their expressions are so furious, I wouldn’t be surprised if they started breathing fire. Both of them have tight lips and glowering eyes. If looks could kill, they’d each already be dead.

  When Eli still hasn’t said anything, it’s as if Jake can’t resist. He keeps talking. Getting it all out, after holding it in for months.

  “If you really think fucking my sister is going to get you in good with the family, you’ve got another thing coming. You’re nothing but a piece of shit.”

  “Jake!” I gasp, but he ignores me.

  “And you using her shows just how low you’ll go. You’re lower than a snake. You’re worthless, with your subpar team and your shitty family. And that shitty school you go to. No one gives a fuck about you anymore, Eli. Not even your drunk mom and your cheating dad,” Jake says with an ugly sneer.

  Oh, once Jake unloads that last bit, Eli’s on top of him, taking him down. They’re rolling around on the ground, arms swinging, legs kicking. I hear grunts. Curse words. Hisses of breath. All the while I’m screaming, hopping up and down, begging them to stop. I grab hold of Jake’s shirt and try to pull him off Eli, but he’s too strong. The both of them are.

  I don’t even notice until it’s too late that the backyard lights switch on. The kitchen door opens and Mom and Dad appear in the backyard with us.

  “What the hell is going on?” Dad roars.

  The boys don’t even notice. They’re too busy trying to do permanent damage to each other’s faces.

  “Stop!” I tell them, trying to grab at my brother, but my effort is wasted. He doesn’t even flinch. “Eli!” My boyfriend doesn’t notice me either. He’s too busy trying to smash my brother’s face in with his fist.

  This can’t be h
appening. They can’t be fighting about me. Though really, this has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with the hatred that’s been building between them for years. Eli may be the obvious shit stirrer in this situation, but Jake has nurtured this rivalry too. In a far more discreet, subtle way. Neither of them are innocent.

  Doesn’t mean I condone what they’re doing. Or what Jake said about Eli’s family. How did he know his parents are getting a divorce?

  “Fable, grab Ava,” Dad commands. “Get her away from them.”

  I’m standing mere feet away from where the boys are fighting, helpless and crying. I can feel the tears streaming down my cheeks and when my gaze meets Mom’s, her face is full of sympathy and worry. She comes to me and wraps me up in her arms and the sobs come full force, my gaze never leaving the two boys tangled up with each other on the ground.

  “Jake!” Dad yells as he stomps toward them. He grabs the neck of Jake’s shirt and yanks him off of Eli, as if he weighs nothing. “What are you doing?”

  There’s already a bruise forming under my brother’s eye. He points at Eli, who’s now shifted into the sitting position, but is still on the ground. “This fucker is using Ava to get to me!”

  My gaze goes to Eli. There’s blood dripping from his mouth and he’s wincing. As if he’s in pain, which I’m sure he is. Pulling out of my mother’s embrace, I run over to kneel beside him. “Are you all right?” I touch his shoulder.

  Jake makes a disgusted noise, but I ignore him. I ignore everyone. I want to make sure Eli’s okay.

  Eli lifts his head slowly, his gaze meeting mine, and his eyes are cold.

  So cold.

  “I’m fine,” he spits out as he shrugs away from my touch and rises unsteadily to his feet. He’s breathing hard. So is Jake. My parents are watching them with matching horrified expressions on their faces. I’m surprised they don’t threaten to call the cops.

  “What are you doing here?” Dad asks, his voice like ice.

  Eli stands up straight. Runs a hand through his hair before gently touching the corner of his mouth. “I didn’t mean to cause any trouble.”

  Jake bursts out laughing, and Mom shushes him.

  “You didn’t answer the question,” Dad says, his voice firm. Oh, I recognize that voice. He only busts it out when one of us is in deep trouble. “What are you doing here?”

  Eli remains quiet, though he never looks in my direction, which hurts. Jake’s watching him as if he’s daring Eli to say something stupid. I’m the one who steps up and answers the question.

  “He came to see me, Daddy.”

  The surprise that registers on my father’s face would almost be comical if this was any other time. I’ve obviously floored him. “Why?”

  I swallow hard. Clear my throat. Nerves attack me, making me jittery under my father’s careful gaze. “Because we’re to—”

  “I’m in love with her, sir.” Eli interrupts as he straightens his spine, wincing a little. I wonder if he’s badly hurt. He’s still not recovered from his fight with his friend Brenden. He has to be injured.

  Jake starts to laugh, clutching his stomach. Mom tells him to shut up—pretty major, considering how she always claims she hates those two words—and my heart pangs at Eli’s words, the sincerity in his tone and written all over his face.

  “But I think I made a mistake.” Eli’s icy gaze meets mine once more and it’s like I can feel all the blood drain out of my body, leaving me weak.

  “What do you mean?” I ask as I start to rush toward him but Mom grabs my arm, stopping me. “Eli?”

  He says nothing. Just glares at all of us with his hand on his face, his fingers pressing against his cheek. He appears utterly defeated, and there’s pain in his eyes. Pain and fury and hopelessness. He looks broken. Battered. And he won’t look at me. Not really. I don’t know what’s wrong. I don’t know where I went wrong and he’s not talking to me.

  “You should go,” Dad tells him, his voice firm. “It’s late. Your parents are probably wondering where you’re at.”

  Eli laughs, though it’s flat and totally lacking humor. “Right. Sure.” He walks slowly, as if it pains him to move. He pauses in front of my father. “Sorry for all the trouble I caused.”

  With those last words, he turns and leaves.

  And my heart just cracked wide open, spilling all over the place.

  “No.” I try to jerk out of my mother’s grip, but she’s surprisingly strong. “Let me go.”

  “Why was he here, Ava?” Dad asks me, and when our gazes meet, I can tell he’s confused. And furious. “Is he actually in love with you? Or is this another one of his tricks?”

  “Yeah, tell us what’s going on, Ava. Is he tricking you or what?” Jake adds, taunting me.

  My throat too clogged with emotion, I don’t answer them. Not like I could anyway. I pull out of my mother’s hold and chase after Eli, ignoring Jake and Dad, who are both yelling at me to come back. That I should forget about him. I ignore Mom too, who’s also calling my name. I chase after the boy I love, knowing that he can hear me call for him.

  “Eli, stop! Please!”

  He’s too fast. And he won’t stop and wait for me. Why not? He always stops. He always hears me out. Always. He has faith in me. He’s the only one who ever really has.

  I spot him crossing the street heading for his car, and I break out into a full run. My bare feet slap against the rough asphalt, digging into gravel and I grimace at the pain. “Eli!”

  He whirls on me in the middle of the street, his eyes blazing with anger. “Get away from me.”

  The venom in his voice makes me come to a full stop, my heart beating so hard I’m afraid it’s going to break free out of my chest. “What?” I gasp.

  “Stay. The fuck. Away from me.” The words drop from his lips like bombs, detonating into my heart. Shattering me. “You told him.”

  “I told who?”

  “Your fucking brother! You told him about my parents.” He plunges both hands into his hair and tugs, the pain on his face slicing me in two. “How could you? That was a secret. You knew that. I didn’t want anyone to know.”

  I’m shaking my head over and over, my mind scrambling. “I never said anything to my brother about you.”

  “Then how did he know? He called my mom an alcoholic. And my dad a cheater. I told you that. I told you everything.” He lets go of his hair, resting his hands on his hips. He’s so angry, and despite it all, I can’t help but think how beautiful he looks. Even when he’s mad.

  Even when he’s mad at me.

  “No one knows anything about your parents, not from me. Jake only found out about us last night, after your story on Instagram. He confronted me in my room, but we never talked about your family,” I explain, making my way toward him tentatively. Carefully.

  “Don’t come any closer,” Eli demands, and I stop. The misery in his voice is clear. He doesn’t want me near him. “I trusted you, Ava.”

  It’s the fact that he used the word in past tense that breaks me. I start to cry. So hard, my vision gets blurry. “I didn’t say anything. I swear, Eli. I would never do that to you!”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  His flat statement is like a kick to the face.

  “If I can’t trust you, then…”

  His voice drifts, and I stare at him, feeling helpless. Blood still trickles from the corner of his mouth, and there’s a bruise forming on his cheek. There’s a cut on his forehead too and he’s still breathing hard, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

  I want to go to him. I want to comfort him. But I know he won’t let me.

  And that hurts.

  “Then what?” I throw my arms up in the air in frustration, feeling my robe loosen. I quickly tighten the belt, hating that we’re having the most important conversation of our relationship in the middle of the road.

  “Then this won’t work.” His gaze meets mine. “We’re through.”

  “No.” I march toward him. R
est my hands on his chest, grateful that he doesn’t move. I stare into his face, willing him to look at me. To meet my gaze and see the sincerity there. The truth. “I won’t let you give up on us.”

  “I can’t be with a girl I can’t trust.” He refuses to meet my gaze, staring off into the distance.

  I clutch his shirt in my hands, clinging to him. “Please, Eli. I never said anything to him, I swear.”

  He spares me a quick glance. “I don’t believe you.”

  How can he be so cold? So ruthless?

  My hands drop away from his shirt as I stare at him in horror. I take a step back. Then another. And another. “Maybe I was wrong. Maybe you did use me to get to Jake.”

  “Don’t turn this around on me,” he says, his voice tight. “This isn’t about what I did to you. This is about what you did to me.”

  I’m shaking. I gave this boy my virginity, I told him I loved him, and all for what? So he could walk away from me so easily after he believes I would tell Jake about his family problems? Does he really have that little faith in me?

  Apparently, yes.

  “You really believe that I told Jake about your parents?” I ask calmly.

  Too calmly.

  “Yes!” The word explodes from his chest. “Why would you do that, Ava? After everything we’ve been through? After everything I said to you? You know how much Jake hates me, yet you give him ammunition that he can use against me? What the fuck?”

  Before I can respond, before I can defend myself, he turns and walks away.

  I can’t stop crying. I stay in the middle of the road as he climbs into his car. He stares straight ahead the entire time when he starts the engine, puts the car into drive and pulls away. Leaving me behind.

  Alone.

  With a broken heart.

  OMG yes, I left you hanging! And I’m SURE you want more. Or maybe you’re mad at me. Read the acknowledgements for the full explanation, but just know, you’ll get the rest of Eli and Ava’s story in Meant To Be!

  Don’t believe that release date for Meant To Be either - it’s coming mid to late October, not January 2021. Only a little over a month until you get the rest of the story! Keep reading for a sneak peek!

 

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