“He’s a good guy,” Marshall said.
Harley grabbed his keys from the table where he’d left them and offered them to him. “Stay at my place.”
“Let’s not push our luck,” Marshall said.
“We can stay at Piper’s, give you privacy,” Harley suggested.
“No, really. I’m good. As you said, we have a lot to work through, and one of my issues is standing up for myself, not needing a savior. I appreciate you being there for me, but it’s healthiest if I find my own way, overcome my own obstacles.” Marshall glanced at Piper and said, “Thanks for giving me a shove in the right direction, Piper. I needed it.”
“You know how much I like bossing people around. You should put some ice on that shiner.”
“Nah. Battle wounds are to be worn proudly.” Marshall winked at Harley.
Harley called Jiggs from where he’d wandered behind the bar. He slung an arm around Piper, and they all headed out to the parking lot. It was a brisk, starless night, and as Harley locked the door, he said, “Why don’t we meet at Dee’s tomorrow morning around nine? The girls will be at school. That’ll give you and Delaney a chance to figure out how to talk to them about everything.”
“Can we make it eight? I’d like to try to do it as soon as possible, if you don’t mind. It’s hell trying to sleep these days with all of this on my mind,” Marshall said.
“Sure. The girls will be on the bus by then. I’ll text Dee and Mom.”
“I’ve learned to always try to say goodbye when given the chance.” Marshall looked tentatively at Harley and said, “Mind if I give your girl a hug?”
“Of course not.”
Marshall embraced Piper and said, “You’ve got the better man. Treat him well.”
Harley’s heart swelled, but now that he knew what Marshall had been through, he wasn’t so sure his brother was right. “I’d say we’re neck and neck.”
“That’s generous of you. Thanks for hearing me out. I won’t let you down.” Marshall opened his arms and waited for Harley to take him up on the embrace. When he did, Marshall whispered, “Don’t forget what I said. For once in your life, be your own hero. You deserve it.”
They exchanged phone numbers, and Harley tugged Marshall into another hug. “I’m glad you’re back. I love you, man.”
“I love you, too.” Marshall gave Jiggs a pat on the head and climbed on his motorcycle.
As he drove away, Harley filled Piper in on what had transpired, from the first punch to the deaths of Marshall’s wife and child, the Dark Knights, Marshall’s recovery, and every heart-wrenching detail in between. He got choked up again, and Piper’s eyes teared up as he answered her questions, and then he wrapped her in his arms and counted his blessings. His brother was back in town trying to rebuild a life he’d never known, his sister was healthy, and his mother was getting her son back. Harley had his pup by his side and his girl in his arms. He was on top of the world.
“I can’t get over all that he’s been through.” Piper rested her chin on his chest and said, “He’s lost so much.”
He thought of how much he’d already lost—his father, time with Marshall, time with Piper before—and he thought about how much the people he loved had lost, and the people Piper loved. In the space of a few fast heartbeats, Marshall’s warning magnified. Harley knew what he wanted, what he’d always wanted, and there beneath the starless sky, in the parking lot of his family’s pub, he went after it with everything he had.
He took Piper’s hands in his, gazing deeply into her eyes, and said, “We have all lost too much. I don’t want to risk losing anything else, Piper. I don’t want to wait another minute to tell you how I feel.”
He got down on one knee, and Piper’s face blanched.
“What are you doing?”
“Seizing the moment,” he said as Jiggs came to his side.
“Nonononono. Harley, you can’t do this.” Her warning was clear, but so was that smile tugging at her lips.
“Oh, I’m doing this,” he said playfully, trying to snap her out of her shock. “Piper, my sweet girl with a hair trigger, these last several weeks have been the best of my life. I was wrong when I said I’d be okay just dating you. You’re my best friend, my lover, and my beer-drinking, sports-watching, sass-talking, wing-eating goddess. I love you so damn much. I want forever with you—a ring on your finger, babies, burnt cookies. I want it all. And I know you thought you didn’t want to get married, but I’m hoping you feel the same way I do.”
Tears streamed down her cheeks.
“Say you’ll marry me, Pipe, and I promise you we’ll have a great life together.”
As he rose to his feet, she covered her mouth with a trembling hand.
“How could you?” she accused through a rush of tears, stumbling backward. “Everything was so good. We were happy! You promised not to try to change me. I trusted you! I can’t . . .” She ran toward her truck.
He was momentarily frozen. But then his brain kicked in and he took off after her, snagging her by the wrist. Her tears sliced through him like a knife. “I thought things had changed for you, too.”
“They did, but that didn’t!” she hollered, hurt welling in her eyes. She pulled her arm away, stumbling around Jiggs. “I won’t change my mind about marriage, Harley. I know that about myself.”
She was so mad, shaking and crying, but if she could just see them more clearly, he was sure she’d calm down.
“But you’ve already changed. We sleep together every night. We stay at your house, which according to you is huge. You told me that I wasn’t alone in this thing with Marshall anymore, and I know you meant it. I heard it in your voice. Don’t you see, Pipe? We’re already building a life together as a couple.” He paused to let his words sink in, but her tears kept falling. “What do you think has been happening between us? You can try to deny it, but you love me, and you love Jiggs, and damn it, Piper, you know I love you.”
“I knew you wanted marriage!” she said angrily. “I never should have believed you when you said you were okay with the fact that I wasn’t looking for that. If that’s what you need, then maybe . . .” She squeezed her eyes shut, as if the words trying to escape were too painful to even think about.
His gut seized, and the truth rushed out. “What I need is you, Piper, any way I can have you. I just got carried away. I started thinking about the time I lost with Marshall, about Bridgette losing her husband right after Louie was born and Marshall losing his wife and baby, and how we lost my father.” He couldn’t rein in his emotions. “I don’t want to look back and regret not telling you how I feel. I want every second I can have with you. Is that such a crime?”
She shook her head. “No, but . . . I can’t think right now.” She dug her keys out of her pocket and said, “I need space. I need time . . . I need . . .”
“You love me, Trig,” he said softer. “You’re just scared, babe. Yes, I want to marry you, but that’s not because I want to change who you are.”
She rolled her eyes and said, “That’s exactly what marriage does.” Her voice changed as she said, “Mrs. Harley Dutch! Fuck Piper Dalton. She’ll fail to exist the second we say ‘I do’!”
“You know that’s not true, and you know I don’t want that. Look at your sisters and Aurelia. Look at your parents, Piper. I know you’ve had shitty boyfriends in the past, my brother included, but I’m not them.”
She shook her head, and he had no idea if she knew how wrong she was, or if she felt too sucker punched by his impromptu proposal to think straight. Either way, he had to fix this.
“Then don’t change your name, baby. I’m not asking you to give up your job and be a stay-at-home mom. I’m only asking you to commit to loving me—loving us—forever.”
She pulled open the door of her truck and took a few steps toward him, then veered away, like she was confused. He stepped forward, but she held up her hand and said, “Please don’t, Harley. I need to go to my house and figure things out. I need
you to give me space.”
Space was the opposite of what they needed. He took another step toward her. “Pipe—”
“Stop! I can’t, Harley!” She looked down at her keys and said, “Don’t come after me. I’m not saying that so you’ll swoop in like a knight in shining armor. I’m saying it because I can’t look at you right now without falling apart.”
His chest constricted. He couldn’t let her go, not like this. “Baby, that’s the last thing I wanted. Just give me a chance to explain.”
She shook her head, tears spilling from her eyes. “You just did. If you love me, you’ll give me time to think.”
She climbed into her truck and sped out of the parking lot, leaving Harley to wonder if he’d just made the biggest mistake of his life.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
PIPER SPED THROUGH town, trying to see through the blur of tears. She kept her eyes locked on the road, gripping the steering wheel so hard her fingers hurt. Her thoughts were drowned out by the stupid whimpering sounds she had no control over. She flew into her driveway and threw the truck into park. As she lowered her face to her hands, she caught movement in her peripheral vision and jumped as a growling-whimpering sound rang out. Her gaze darted to the right, and there on the floor was Jiggs, looking at her with the saddest eyes she’d ever seen.
“Damn it.” Sobs bubbled out. “It’s like you two know just how to get to me!” She narrowed her eyes and said, “You did this on purpose so I’d go back. Well, I have news for you, buddy. You’re stuck with me tonight.”
She threw open her door, and Jiggs bounded across her lap onto the grass. She followed him out. “If you have to go to the bathroom, you’d better do it now, because I’m not walking around this block and letting my neighbors see me like this.”
Jiggs whimpered and lowered his chest to the ground, wiggling his butt.
“No.” She walked past him and sat down on the porch steps. “Go do your business. I’ll wait here.”
Jiggs sat in front of her, put his chin on her knees, and whimpered.
“What are you? Part Harley? Go pee already.” She pointed to the yard, feeling numb, which was better than feeling like her heart was being crushed. “If there is a higher power, then he’ll give me a break and you’ll march out there and do your thing.”
Jiggs barked as a motorcycle roared past her house. Marshall. Her heart lurched. Could tonight get any worse? The bike stopped a few houses down, turned around, and pulled up to the curb across the street. Marshall took off his helmet and climbed from the bike, heading her way.
She was going to kill Harley. “You can tell your brother that needing space means not sending his brother.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Why are you here?” she seethed.
“Because you sped past the church like a bat out of hell.” He petted Jiggs and sat down beside her on the porch. “You’re crying.”
She swiped at her eyes. “So?”
“Piper, what happened? You guys seemed so happy.”
“What happened? You came back and ruined my life. Again.”
He huffed out a sort of chuckle. “I knew it. Harley doesn’t trust me, does he?”
“Yes. I don’t know. I think he does. What are you talking about?” Her brain was overloaded.
“I’m just trying to figure out how you went from hugging my brother to looking like he just broke up with you and stealing his dog.”
She groaned and closed her eyes. “He didn’t break up with me. He proposed. And I didn’t steal his dog. Jiggs was a stowaway, and I’m sure Harley made him do it just so I had a reason to go back.”
As if on cue, Jiggs climbed onto the step and pushed his chin onto her lap.
Marshall looked confused. Join the club.
“Aren’t women usually happy about proposals?”
“Probably! But I don’t want to get married, and he knows it. Everyone in this town knows it, for Pete’s sake.”
“Wait, the girl who planned out our entire life when we were teenagers doesn’t want to get married?”
“What are you talking about?” She sighed. “I’m not in the mood for games. You should go be with your brother, and take Jiggs to him.”
His gaze moved slowly over her face. “You really don’t remember, do you?”
“I remember seeing you and Victoria Mathers half-naked behind the boathouse, which is something I’d really like to forget.”
“I’m sorry for that,” he said kindly. “Do you know why I cheated on you?”
“Because you were a selfish asshole.” A breeze swept up the yard, and she crossed her arms, rubbing them against the chill.
Marshall took off his leather jacket and draped it over her shoulders. “I was a selfish asshole, but do you know why else?”
“Because I wouldn’t put out for you.”
“I was definitely a horny kid, but that’s not the real reason.” He leaned his forearms on his knees, worrying with his hands, and said, “You planned out our life. You said we’d both go to college, then move back to Sweetwater, where you’d make your handygirl service into a full-time job. I’d become a fireman, we’d have two kids, a boy and a girl. Is any of this ringing a bell?”
She shook her head. “Definitely not.”
“Damn,” he said with a sigh. “I must have really screwed you up. Those life plans of yours were the biggest reason I cheated. I tried to break up with you by saying I was sick of you not putting out, but you were so stubborn. You argued with me, telling me that real relationships weren’t based on sex. Do you remember that?”
It was starting to come back to her now, the pain, the challenge of getting him to love her, the hurt when he’d cheated. But apparently Marshall didn’t need an answer, because he continued telling her about who she’d been.
“You scared the hell out of me, Piper. I was a stupid kid with anxieties that I didn’t understand, and you were so organized and ready to take on the world. But no matter what I did to show you we weren’t right for each other, you held on tight.”
“Well, I never held on tight again, that’s for sure.”
“Until my brother,” he said.
She clenched her teeth, fresh tears stinging her eyes.
“I’m sorry, Piper. I’m sorry for cheating on you and for hurting you. I didn’t realize I ruined your love of romance and your dreams of marriage. I take full responsibility for ruining your past, and I’d give anything to take it all back. Every hurt I ever caused anyone. But don’t blame Harley for my mistakes. He’s a good man, and he’s loved you for as long as I can remember.”
“Nice try, but we both know he barely saw me when I was younger.”
Marshall shook his head. “What is it about you two? You’re both too damn blind to see what’s right in front of your eyes. Do you remember my Jet Ski accident?”
“Right after we broke up. You got hurt pretty bad.”
“There was no Jet Ski accident. Harley beat me up for cheating on you.”
Piper’s jaw dropped.
“Yeah, the guy who didn’t have feelings for you. Remember when I dared you to streak?”
She nodded.
“I was stupidly bragging to him when he came home that weekend, and he roughed me up pretty good. How about the boat? Did he tell you he was the one who finished it?”
She shook her head, floored at what she was hearing.
“I blew it off and went out with my friends instead of working on it. He tracked me down, beat me up again, and told me to straighten my ass out and do right by you.”
“That doesn’t make sense,” she said. “When you left it in my yard, the note said you finished it for me.”
“Harley wrote it. He didn’t want you to be hurt because I’d dropped the ball, and he knew if he told you the truth, you’d be sad. He was saving you from me.” He raked a hand through his hair and pushed to his feet.
Jiggs lifted his head, watching him.
“I take full responsibilit
y for hurting you, Piper, and for ruining your past. I can’t fix that,” he said regretfully. “But I can do my best to learn from it and try not to hurt anyone else, including you and my brother. He’s got a hero complex, Piper.”
“Watch it, Marshall,” she warned.
He held his hands up in surrender. “That can be a horrible thing, but in Harley’s case, it’s a good thing. He’s got a big fucking heart, and I sure as hell wish I could have inherited one-tenth of it. You’ll do what you want, but I’m sure somewhere inside you that teenage girl who looked at me with hope in her eyes is trying to climb out because she realizes my brother is the best man she’ll ever know. I hope you let that girl shine, Piper, because while your hurtful past is on me, if you let Harley go, your unhappy future is on you.”
He turned to leave, and she slipped off his jacket. “Marshall.” She held it out to him and said, “Can you take Jiggs to him? He should be with Harley. I’m not the most tactful person.”
“Sorry, Piper, but one thing I’ve learned is that we all need to take responsibility for our own actions and clean up our own messes.”
She looked down at Jiggs as Marshall drove away. “Guess you’re spending the night with me.” She tipped her head back and looked up at the dark sky. “Thanks a lot. All I wanted was for Jiggs to pee, not a trip back in time or a look in the mirror.”
Harley felt like he’d opened his mouth beneath a spigot and swallowed a gallon of heartache. He was an idiot. He wished he could take back what he’d said to Piper, even though he’d meant every word of it. He hadn’t meant to hurt her, but she was right. He’d made her a promise, and he’d gotten carried away and broken his word to the person who mattered most. Now he might have lost her for good, and that thought made him sick and lonely and so fucking sad he couldn’t see straight.
Harley wanted to go to her, to apologize and do whatever it took to make things right, but he knew better than to defy his girl’s request for space after what he’d done—and he refused not to think of Piper as his girl. She was, and if he had it his way, even if it took years to win her trust back, she’d be by his side forever.
She Loves Me Page 33