Everything I Know
Page 8
Trying to fit in is the safest thing we can do. But there’s already too much fitting in. Choosing a unique adventure can sound hard and scary. So why should we bother? We could stay safe and do things the “normal” way. The tried and tested way. The way others have gone before us and found success.
Making your own path means walking into the dark without a flashlight (or flashlight app), but there’s no other way to live a meaningful life guided by what you value – and everyone has different values.
Your work is not just about you; it’s about the people who consume it. Finding where your own values and meaning align with what your audience is willing to pay for (your intersection) is magical stuff and can take a lifetime to achieve.
You might be scared on your path, sure. But the only way forward is to take a small step. Then another. And then another. Keep moving until it resembles walking or running. What you create is a reflection of yourself, so it gains meaning as it gets closer to your own magnetic north. Your internal compass points to what you value, so fail or succeed, stay true to that and you’ll never get lost.
This isn’t the end; this is the beginning. Forge a new path by taking a single step in a new direction. Staying true to your values requires you to constantly check in and re-evaluate what you’re doing. Fears don’t ever go away, but you can manage them and push on to do great work alongside your fear.
You are responsible for the work you put into the world, so why not make that work great?
Epilogue
I realize that I tend to write a lot about negative emotions and experiences, like criticism. Fear. Failure.
Horribly un-uplifting (down-lifting isn't a word for a reason). My words are typically framed in the guise of overcoming and championing, which is my pessimistic way of getting to write what I want with only a glimmer of hope at the end.
So what happens in the absence of negative emotions? I'm not talking about finally overcoming all of those self-confidence trials and tribulations to become an egomaniac (that’s another book altogether). But what happens when you find your "groove?" When you're sitting at your desk working and the muse actually shows up to whisper in your ear?
Inspiration. Genius. Revelation. Whatever you call it, the world (for all its faults), sometimes reveals works of beautiful art and moments of brilliance. Even thinking about the times when you’ve experienced that magic, in whatever large or small way, can give you goose bumps.
There’s a constant struggle inside all of us to create something inspired and awesome.
The negative moments can make it feel impossible to achieve the open space and attention required for brilliant creation. We tell ourselves we can't or we're not good enough and then let all those criticisms, fears and failures stream in. They can consume us. But then sometimes they don't. Their defenses are not without cracks, and sometimes we see a light shining through and run screaming toward it with all our might, like a streaker across a football field.
How do we find our own genius? Why does it happen sometimes and not in other moments? Can the secret be bottled and sold as a travelling sideshow tonic? If so, sign me up for ALL THE BOTTLES.
I may not know how to create amazing work with every try (no one does), but I sure as hell know what it feels like, if briefly. There are pieces of writing, music and design I've done that I don't hate. Fleeting, proud moments. Those moments of inspiration make me feel like I'm myself (which shouldn't seem as foreign as it does). It feels like I've grasped my true voice and held onto it with all my strength, if only for a second. It feels a little frantic, too, as if the muse is always trying to get away.
But in those inspiring moments, I feel utterly present – so present that if I took even a microsecond to think about the feeling, I'd lose it. It's the sort of presence that holds no room for subconscious worries or multi-tasking thoughts.
In genius there is only space to do whatever the genius is channeling. A phone call, calendar notification or a stray thought about your Twitter feed grinds everything to a halt. Since the revelation is fleeting, like it has other places to be, the second you weaken your grip or lose the strength to hold on, it moves on – until someone else grabs hold tightly. Lucky bastard.
Here’s the most interesting part: the second before it hits, right as the muse draws in her breath to whisper in your ear, is when all those negative thoughts and ideas reach their pinnacle. It’s the absolute worst second of your life and you’re at your most fearful. You might feel okay about writing until you sit at a keyboard and stare at a blank screen. You might feel like you can write a great song until you pick up that guitar and think about the first chord. Then you panic. Breathe more rapidly. You probably grab your phone and refresh Facebook instead of pushing through the fear.
This is the make or break moment – and the rub is, even if you start and become a conduit for inspiration in that second, nothing is guaranteed. You can start working and the genius might not arrive. But it's a numbers game, and your odds of doing great work increase only when you do more work. Keep at it and you may do great, inspired work. But if, in that moment, you go the easy path, the path of least resistance, the path that leads back to the same, tired place, then you missed your chance. You’re back to staring at online cat or celebrity photos, and the possibility of doing great work returns to zero. It goes back to being a pipe dream, something for future attempts... for tomorrow.
Repeatedly summoning the courage or resolution to work can wear down your resistance. If you do something every day, routinely, your fears can diminish – not totally, not even majorly, but enough to notice. Those fears get tired of being ignored. They grow weary and maybe even bored. That's why it's typically easier to write the middle of the book than the first page, or to finish that last part of a painting than the initial brush stroke. Or to play the 32nd show versus the very first tour date.
Attention is a gift you give to your work. The more attention you devote to something, the less space fear can occupy.
Attention isn’t just about avoiding your neuroses (always a good thing); it means you're absolutely present and ready for your genius. It means you can get down to work and if the muse is feeling talkative, the work might turn out brilliantly.
Genius might be trying to reach you right fucking now. Are you listening, or are you busy refreshing Twitter?
About the author
Paul Jarvis is a web designer, author and gentleman of adventure.
He’s founded several start-ups, toured the US and Canada in the band Mojave, self-published two books, and has worked as a web designer for almost two decades.
Paul’s writing appears in Fast Company, 99u, The Next Web, GOOD, Elephant Journal, Design Taxi, Medium.com and many other publications. With an international reputation as the designer whose vision and web design strategy builds multi-million dollar businesses, he’s worked with Fortune 500 companies, best-selling authors and the world’s biggest entrepreneurs. Paul’s clients include Yahoo, Mercedes-Benz, Microsoft, The Highline in New York City, Danielle LaPorte, Marie Forleo and Kris Carr.
You can find him on Twitter at @pjrvs. He currently lives in the woods on Vancouver Island with his wife Lisa and their two rats, Onha’ and Awe:ri.
He also thinks writing about himself in the third-person is kind of weird... but not in the “good weird” way.
Thanks
My wife, Lisa, for continuing to put up with an introverted, stoic and neurotic husband. Cheri Hanson for being brilliant with words and helping me put them together. Marc Johns for being able to make beautiful art. Justine Musk for the killer, inspiring foreword. Everyone else who has helped to make this possible with guidance, assistance, criticism and kicks in the ass.
And you, the reader.
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