Securing Caite

by Susan Stoker

  “I know. Being the girlfriend or wife of a SEAL isn’t easy.”

  “Is that what we are? Boyfriend and girlfriend?” she asked hesitatingly.

  “Caite, we’ve talked every day since I tracked you down. I can’t go even a few hours without thinking about you and wondering what you’re doing. I swear I can still taste you on my lips and I dream about kissing you. I fantasize about what it’ll be like when we finally make love. Yeah…I’d say you’re definitely my girlfriend.”

  “Oh.”

  “Oh? That’s all you have to say?” he teased. “Do you consider me to be your boyfriend?”

  “Yes.”

  Her answer was immediate and heartfelt, and it went a long way toward soothing any doubts Rocco may have had.

  “Good.”

  “When do you leave?” Caite asked.

  Rocco frowned. “In about four hours.”

  “Damn.”

  “Yeah. I wish I could get away to see you before we head out, but we’re going to be in meetings and getting our gear set up and ready to go.”

  “I understand.”

  Rocco’s voice dropped. “I’m going to miss you, ma petite fée. You have no idea how much.”

  “Uh…yeah, I think I do, because I’m going to miss you the same way. I’ve gotten kinda used to you.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Uh-huh. You’ll call when you get back?”

  “Of course. If it’s okay, I’ll come see you as soon as I can.”

  “Please.” Then she sighed.

  “What is it?”

  “I just realized how much I’ve been talking to you lately. You’re the first person I call when I get off work, and we’ve been talking in the mornings before I head off to the store. I’m going to miss having someone to talk to.”

  Kicking himself for not introducing her to Caroline and some of the other SEAL wives before now, Rocco said, “I’m sorry that I’ve been keeping you all to myself.”

  “Don’t be. I’m not.”

  “Still. When I get back, I’ll make sure to introduce you to some of the women who are married to my other SEAL friends. Well, they’re retired SEALs now, but they still help with training. They’re amazing women, and I know they’ll have a lot of insight for you on how to make it through the times when I head off to missions.”

  She didn’t say anything for almost a full minute, and Rocco asked, “Caite?”

  “I’m here.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Introducing me to them seems serious.”

  Rocco sighed in exasperation. “What did I just say, ma petite fée? We’re together. Dating. An item. Boyfriend-girlfriend. Going out. Anything I can do to make my missions easier on you, I’ll do. I hate the thought of you being alone when I’m gone. Have you had any leads on admin positions?”

  He knew it was an abrupt change of topic, but he just remembered that he’d wanted to ask.

  “Not yet.”

  “Damn.”

  “I’m fine at the convenience store for now.”

  “You’ll be safe?” Rocco asked.

  “Of course.”

  “I mean it, Caite. The statistics on violent crimes are through the roof in places like that.”

  “I know. Rocco, just because you’re leaving doesn’t mean it gets more or less dangerous. It is what it is. I’m looking for another job, but it’s not that easy.”

  He could hear the irritation in her voice. “I know. But I can’t get to you if something happens and I’m out of the country.”

  His words seemed to calm her. “I’ll be fine. I went through the training on what to do if someone holds up the place. I’m not working the night shift. I’m not going to do anything stupid…and that’s if anything even happens.”

  Rocco wanted to tell her that the mission they were going on should be a short one. That he should be home in a week or less. But he couldn’t tell her anything. He’d never been as frustrated with the secrecy that came with his job as he was at this moment.

  “I’d like to give you a few phone numbers of men I trust…just in case.”

  Caite sighed, then asked, “You’re really worried, aren’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  “You know, I should be the one worrying. If something happens to you, I’ll probably never find out. I know how the military works; you forget that I worked as a DOD contractor for years. We aren’t married. If you get hurt or, God forbid, killed, I’ll never know. I should be the one lecturing you on being safe and watching your six. Not the other way around.”

  She had a point. “I’ll make sure to tell my buddy Wolf to contact you immediately if something happens.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel better,” she said in a whisper.

  Shit. He was definitely fucking this up. “When I get back, I’m gonna take you out…and when I bring you home, I’m not going to leave you at your door. I’m going to spend all night exploring this electric connection we have. I can’t wait to see and touch every inch of your luscious body.”

  “That was just mean,” Caite protested with a little huff. “Now I’m sad and turned on, and I don’t have time to do anything about it before I have to go to work.”

  “Now who’s being mean?” Rocco asked, a vision of her lying on her bed naked, a hand between her legs, taunting him.

  “Thank you for telling me you’re leaving,” she said quietly.

  “There will be times when we don’t have as much time as we have today to prepare,” he told her honestly. “But I will never, ever leave without letting you know. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

  “Okay.”

  “And now I really do have to go. The guys are waiting for me.”

  “Please be careful,” Caite said.

  “Always,” Rocco told her. “I’ll text you a few numbers later. Please use them if you need anything.”

  “I’ll be fine.”

  It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, and it wasn’t a promise, but he didn’t have time to press her right now. Later, he’d introduce her to Wolf and Cutter. Maybe if she knew them personally, she’d feel more comfortable calling them when he was gone. Not only that, but he’d see if Caroline and Dakota and the other women would take Caite under their wing. He remembered Wolf telling him about how alone Caroline had felt when she’d first begun dating him, when the other men on his team didn’t have girlfriends yet. It was probably exactly how Caite felt.

  The words “I love you” were on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn’t say them yet. It was too soon. She’d think him crazy. “Be safe,” he said instead.

  “You too.”

  “I’ll call when I get back.”

  “Okay.”

  “Bye, ma petite fée.”

  “Bye, Rocco.”

  He clicked off the phone feeling unsettled and antsy. He definitely wished he could’ve told her in person that he was leaving.

  Sighing, he pocketed his phone and turned to head into the conference room. Commander Storm North and the rest of his team were waiting for him before starting the debrief. All Rocco knew was that they were headed to Africa. They were following up on a tip about more smuggled artifacts out of the Middle East.

  Three days after Rocco had called to tell her he was leaving, Caite was feeling depressed. It was silly, really. She was used to living a solitary life. When she’d been working as a contractor, she went days without talking to anyone outside of work.

  But Rocco had given her something to look forward to. She usually called him when she got off work, while she was walking back to her apartment, and then spoke to him again before she went to sleep.

  Then he’d call in the morning to make sure she was up. Since he got up at the butt crack of dawn to work out, he was always up before her. She was usually awake already, but she loved being able to talk to him before she headed off to the convenience store.

  They rarely talked about anything super interesting, but somehow over the last couple of weeks, she’d gotten to kno
w Rocco better than just about any man she’d dated in the past. She knew both his parents were alive and well and living in Florida. He didn’t have any siblings, but considered the men he worked with to be his brothers in every way that mattered.

  He hated bright colors and couldn’t stand tomatoes. He loved seafood and apples, but hated sushi and apple pie. He loved working out, and even though most of his friends had tattoos, he hadn’t had the urge to mark up his body in that way.

  And all the time he’d taken to talk and text and get to know her on an intellectual level had done what no other man had accomplished. It made Caite impatient to move their relationship to the next level.

  She wanted Rocco. Ached for him. Even thinking about him made her nipples pucker in anticipation.

  In the past, she’d succumbed to sleeping with the few men she’d dated because it was eventually expected. But she hadn’t really needed anyone. Not like she did Rocco.

  She missed talking to him. Missed telling him about her day and missed hearing him talk about his own. It was fascinating to hear him talk about his job. She’d had no idea SEALs worked out as much as Rocco and his team did. And they trained nonstop. Things like getting out of that hole in the ground. Ways to outsmart the enemy. She’d worked for the military, but she’d had no clue.

  Caite wondered where he was at that moment. What he was doing. She prayed he was safe. She wasn’t an idiot. She knew wherever he was and whatever mission they were on was probably dangerous. He could be shot. Captured. Tortured.

  Groaning, she wiped a hand over her face and stood up straight. It was quiet in the store at the moment. She’d stocked the shelves and straightened the cigarettes behind the counter. No one was getting gas and her coworker was in the back, supposedly doing inventory but more likely smoking pot. Caite didn’t care. It was hard to care about anything when Rocco was gone.

  The bell over the front door rang and Caite looked up. Straightening in surprise, she stared at the man wearing a ski mask over his face.

  He lifted a gun and pointed it at her. Caite immediately lifted her arms, showing him that she was unarmed.

  “Give me all the money,” the man growled in a deep, husky voice.

  Nodding, she immediately pushed the button on the cash register that would unlock the drawer. A little bell jingled as it opened. Quickly, Caite grabbed the bills and shoved them across the counter at the man.

  She couldn’t see his face, except for his eyes, which glittered in the light. She knew the security camera was filming everything, and she prayed the man would say or do something that would help identify him to detectives.

  He grabbed the money without even looking at it.

  Caite read the intent in his eyes before he moved.

  She was already throwing herself to the side when the gun went off.

  A searing pain went through her arm as she fell. Her head hit a shelf behind the counter, and she had the fleeting thought of how pissed Rocco would be when he came home and found out she’d been killed in a fucking robbery.

  Vision fuzzy, she could just make out the man taking a step toward the counter and peering behind it, staring at Caite on the floor, at the blood she could see in her periphery, pooling around her head. Then he spun on his heels and ran from the store. The sound of the bell over the door faded along with her consciousness.

  Eight hours later, Caite was in her apartment, lying on her couch. She had her cell phone in hand and was staring at the last text Rocco had sent before leaving. It had the names and numbers of the men he’d said she should call if anything happened.

  She knew she could call…but really, what was she going to say? “Hi, I’m Caite, you don’t know me but I was shot today.”

  What were they going to do? They had their own families to worry about. They didn’t know her from Adam. Besides, she was home. Alive. In one piece.

  Caite thought about calling her parents, but decided to give that a few days as well. If she called her mom, she had no doubt she’d immediately start driving south. As much as she loved her mom and dad, she wasn’t up to dealing with them at the moment.

  The entire incident at the store had been so surreal. She’d woken up on the floor behind the counter with paramedics asking her questions and poking and prodding her.

  The bullet had merely grazed her upper arm. She’d been lucky. Caite knew that better than all the doctors, paramedics, and cops who had told her so over and over.

  Her head had bled like a stuck pig, but once cleaned, the doctors had discovered it was only a superficial cut. She’d gotten three stitches on her head and four more on her arm. The MRI showed no concussion and she wasn’t nauseous or dizzy. The emergency room doctor had wanted to keep her overnight for observation, but Caite refused. She knew the bill for the ER visit alone was going to be way more than she could afford on her meager salary.

  But now she was home and her arm was throbbing. She had a headache and was feeling very sorry for herself. The manager at the store had “generously” given her the next three days off, but Caite was seriously considering quitting.

  Everything was overwhelming right now. It felt as if her life was crashing in on her. Money, missing Rocco, the pain from her injuries, almost fucking dying. She wasn’t one to cry when life got hard, but she’d been strong all day. The tears started before she could force them back.

  Curling into a ball, careful not to move her arm the wrong way or put pressure on her head wound, Caite gave in to the tears. She’d been able to hold them back all day. Not even breaking down when she’d overheard the cops talking about how if she hadn’t thrown herself to the side, the bullet probably would’ve gone into her heart instead of her arm.

  She was used to being strong. Used to taking care of herself. But at the moment, she didn’t want to be alone. She wanted Rocco.

  Rocco was glad to be back in California. It had only been three days since they’d left, but it seemed so much longer. He hadn’t realized just how much he enjoyed talking to Caite. How much light she brought into his life. No longer was his entire focus on the SEALs. He constantly thought about her. Wondered what she was doing, if she’d been able to take time to eat lunch. Wanted to hear her voice and talk about his day, and hers.

  After going through the debrief with Commander North and the rest of his team, he was anxious to call Caite and let her know he was home. It was late, but he didn’t think she’d mind being woken up.

  “She’s it for you, isn’t she?” Gumby asked when the team was headed out of the debriefing room.

  He looked at his friend and nodded. It didn’t surprise him that Gumby had asked about Caite. Rocco had talked about her a lot over the last few days. “Yeah. I’m pretty sure she is. I mean, I have no idea what the future holds for us, but she’s pretty damn important.”

  “That’s awesome,” Gumby said.

  “Don’t you worry that you’ll lose your edge?” Phantom asked.

  Rocco turned to stare at him. He knew Phantom’d had a horrible childhood and had basically joined the navy to escape his abusive family, but he wasn’t sure where the shitty attitude was coming from.

  “You have a problem with me dating Caite?” he asked, stopping in the hall to confront him.

  The entire team stopped as well.

  “Yes. If it means you’re going to have your mind on pussy instead of having our backs on a mission.”

  Now Rocco was pissed. “Would you say that shit to Wolf? Or Dude? Or even Cookie? Those men would die for their wives and kids, and they’re some of the most hardcore SEALs I’ve ever met.”

  “It’s different with them,” Phantom insisted.

  “Why?” Rocco demanded.

  The muscle in the other man’s jaw ticked as he thought about his response. “Because they’re not you.”

  “What does that mean?” Rocco asked.

  Phantom ran a hand through his already mussed hair. “It means that I love you like a brother. We’ve been through the worst shit anyone can ever go t
hrough together. The last thing I want is a chick fucking things up.”

  Rocco forced his muscles to relax. He stepped toward Phantom and put a hand on his shoulder. “Caite isn’t going to come between us. Ever. This team is my family. Just because Bubba has a twin brother doesn’t mean he cares about us any less. I care about Caite, I’ll readily admit that. I can also admit that I want to see where things between us can go long term, and that there were times I was thinking about her while on this op. But that doesn’t mean when the shit hits the fan, I can’t get my job done. That I won’t do whatever it takes to have your back and everyone else’s on this team.”

  No one said a word as Phantom and Rocco stared at each other.

  Finally, Phantom nodded. “I just…change is hard for me.”

  “I know. But Caite isn’t like the women we’ve fucked around with in the past. I wish you could’ve been in Bahrain and seen her, Phantom. She was fucking phenomenal. Scared out of her mind, but still doing what she felt in her gut was right. Give her a chance.”

  “I don’t have to,” the other man said. “I already like her. I’m just worried about you. You were a lot quieter than usual on this op, and she’s the only thing I could think of that had changed for you.”

  Rocco nodded. “If Wolf and his team can have families and still be able to do their jobs, so can we.”

  All of the men around them nodded in agreement.

  “Now that we’ve got that settled…I need to make a phone call.”

  Everyone grinned, and they all headed back down the hall, making small talk about what they were going to do on their next two days off. Commander North was really good about giving them downtime when they got back from missions. Sometimes they had to come in and give statements about things that might’ve happened while they were overseas, but they always tried to get the meetings done as soon as they got back so they could be free for a couple of days.

  When they reached the parking lot, everyone said their goodbyes and Rocco climbed into his Acura. He quickly turned on his phone…and frowned when he didn’t have any messages or texts waiting. He’d thought for sure Caite would’ve contacted him at least once, even if she knew he wouldn’t be able to respond.