Kiss of the Winter Moon

by Amanda LeMay

  I wanted him to take me to the floor, or lift me up on the counter, or lay me out on the dining table, anywhere he could spread my legs and give me a new memory.

  “So, I was thinking about fifteen or so should be...”

  I gasped and pulled away from Dain as my dad’s voice came from the doorway. The heat tingling in my cheeks burned bright. Which was quite the turnaround, since Dain stood there looking proud and completely unapologetic, without the slightest blush whatsoever.

  Dad stood in his running shorts and waved a hand in our direction. “Yeah, well, whenever you’re ready.” He walked past us and out the side kitchen door toward the garden.

  Dain leaned in and whispered in my ear, “Love you, Jess.” Then he followed my dad out the door.

  THE HORSE ROUND-UP took them about an hour. I closed and latched the big gate when they returned with about twenty horses. From inside the barn, Lucky called out a greeting to them. He sounded lonely and hungry and after spending the night without his mom. I was sure both were true. Poor little guy.

  Dad and Maygan headed off toward the barn as Dain circled around me, staring up with those intense dark eyes of his before he nudged me toward the barn as well. I hesitated, not sure I could handle walking into another barn where so much death had happened.

  What if there’s blood?

  Grow a set of freaking female bits and get over it!

  Dain shook his head. What I thought about all the blood must’ve shown plain as day on my face. He nudged me again and this time I went willingly.

  When we got inside, there was no sign of the tragedy that had taken place the night before. Not even the smell of blood. I blinked back tears of relief. I refused to let my imagination fill in the sight Dain and Dad must have come home to last night. I only hoped Maygan didn’t have to deal with any of the clean-up, though having come to know her in the past week, I was sure she would have been the first out here with a bucket of hot, soapy water and a stiff brush.

  Maygan and Dad had already shifted from their wolf forms and dressed. Maygan vigorously shook two industrial-sized baby bottles with what looked like a mixture of formula. Lucky bounced around his stall on long, spindly legs, his little tail wagging back and forth in his excitement—happy to see anyone. Dad held the stall door open as Maygan stepped inside and wrapped an arm around the colt’s neck. He seemed to know exactly what the bottle was and took right to it, sucking the formula down as fast as he could.

  “Wow. He’s just a little hungry, huh?” I smiled, though it seemed inappropriate somehow. “I’m glad to see he has an appetite.”

  “Yep. He seems to be doing fine. Dain fed him twice during the night and I fed him again just before breakfast.”

  So that’s where Dain had been when he wasn’t in my bed. I smiled again and ran my hand down Dain’s silky back as he nuzzled his face up under my breast.

  “Come on, Dain.” My dad walked over to the tack room and pulled a couple of lead ropes off the wall. “Let’s go get this little guy some company.”

  Dain rubbed his big head against my hip and licked my hand. I leaned into him, wrapped my arms around him, and hugged with all my strength before he trotted off with my dad.

  “Is Lucky going to be okay?” I had no idea what would happen to him without his mother to feed and take care of him.

  “Don’t worry about Lucky.” Maygan held out the empty bottle and I traded her for the full one sitting on the rail. “He’ll be fine. I’ve raised many orphans and I can tell already, he’s a fighter.”

  A damn lucky fighter. He could have easily ended up just like the other horses in the barn.

  “I’m so sorry.” My eyes burned with tears. One sorry just didn’t seem to cover all I wanted to say and once I opened my mouth, it was more like opening a flood gate. “I’m sorry you lost your horses in such a horrible way and I would kill that sick sonofabitch all over again if I could. I’m sorry I was such a bitch when you mated my dad. I’m sorry if the way I behaved caused any trouble. I’m sorry I didn’t apologize the second I stepped foot in your home, which I should have but I just didn’t know how and you’ve been so nice to me and—”

  “Jessy, stop.” Tears streamed down Maygan’s pretty face. “I love you and I forgive you.”

  “I just...I didn’t...I refused to believe...” My own tears came fast. I hiccupped and sniffled and tried to put my feelings into words, into coherent sentences.

  “Stop. It’s okay.” She set the now empty bottle on the rail, unlatched the stall door, came out, and hugged me hard. “You’re okay.”

  Just then, Dad came back into the barn, leading two horses. Lucky bounced up and down on his little legs, nickered a greeting as the other horses nickered back. Dain rubbed up against my body again and tilted his head in curiosity as I wiped away the tears on my cheeks.

  “Go on, you two,” Maygan said. “Go for a run. Jessy, you need it.”

  Dain trotted off to the other end of the barn then danced around excitedly as he waited for me to catch up. I sniffled and wiped the last of my tears. Once I made it to the end of the barn, I stripped off my clothes and left them hanging over a rail. The rush took me over as my bones and muscles changed and shifted, and golden coffee-colored hair covered my body in soft, lustrous fur.

  Dain stood staring at me, so happy, grinning his toothy grin. Then he lowered his chest to the ground, front legs stretched out in front of him, thick, bushy tail held high in the air as it wagged back and forth inviting me to join him, to run, to play. He snorted at me as if asking, are you ready? and I nodded. He took off, racing away from me as fast as his powerful legs would carry him—the damn show-off—his long, sleek, muscular body stretching out to its fullest with each lengthy stride, a masterpiece of grace and beauty. I couldn’t wait until our mating night to feel his teeth sink into my flesh and know without a doubt he was mine.

  I took off, my claws digging in to the hard soil as I raced toward my big, beautiful black wolf. He stopped and turned, waiting for me to catch up.

  Suddenly, his body language changed, became alert as he stared past me toward the long driveway leading up to the ranch. I heard the car engine too, and stopped in my tracks, looking back over my shoulder. Dain was next to me then, rubbing his face against mine but never taking his eyes from the approaching car. As the car pulled up in front of the barn, we silently moved through the high, brown grass to see who had arrived unannounced. Dad and Maygan walked toward the car when a male opened the door and stepped out. He was so tall and...built like a freaking building. Maygan rushed forward and hugged him. She looked like a child in his arms. Even my dad looked small next to this male, who obviously wasn’t a stranger.

  Dain howled a welcome and trotted forward. I followed behind and when I got a little closer, I could swear I was looking at Dain’s twin. Older, bigger, and with much shorter hair, but the resemblance was remarkable.

  Arnou. It had to be. Dain’s real father.

  “Go on.” He waved us off. “Have a good run. I’ll be here when you get back.” He called out as he took my dad’s hand and shook it.

  Dain stopped and nodded, then howled back. I shook my head. He wanted to see Arnou, his father, and all the excitement of running with me seemed to have drained out of him. When he turned to head back out I shook my head “no” again. He leaned his body the full length of mine, rubbed his face all over my back and nipped at my neck, then nodded toward the open land.

  Okay. That little nip might have been an invitation. Or maybe a promise. Either way, it reminded me the full moon was only hours away and I had given an invitation of my own. Never being one to back out of any commitment I’d made, I took a breath, dug my claws into the earth, and raced after the black wolf that stood waiting for me to catch up.

  DAIN RAN ME ALL THE way out to the middle of nowhere-but-tall-golden-grass and for the first time since Bobby laid his hands on me, Dain and I stood facing each other, completely naked, no clothing or quilts between us. Nothing to keep our hand
s from touching all those places we had held only for each other.

  He wrapped me in his big, strong arms, and beneath the warm, winter sun he used nothing but his sweet lips on mine and kissed me. Kissed me full and deep until my heart pounded and every muscle in my body melted for him. For those precious moments, nothing in the world existed outside of the two of us.

  My wolf libido wanted Dain at his wildest—wanted him to take me right there on the ground so fast and so hard and so violently that it would destroy any memory of what Bobby had put me through.

  My human heart...not so much. And I guess Dain knew that too, because what he did do was exactly what I needed.

  Gazing into my eyes, he lifted my chin with his fingertip. “I still love you, Jessy. I still want you more than anything in this world and I will never purposely give you reason to wonder if my feelings for you have changed.” His thumb softly stroked my bottom lip. “I’m giving you an out, Jessy, for tonight.”

  “An out?” I tried to back away a step, but he pulled me tighter against him.

  “Yes. You invited me to spend the night with you, instead of being locked in the storm cellar.” His hands slid down to my hips and held me, his thumbs stroking back and forth across my skin. “If I stay with you...it has to be because you want me, really want me, and not because you gave me an invitation you’re afraid to take back.” His chest rose and fell a little faster than normal and I could feel the rapid beating of his heart right through the palms of his hands where they had moved to circle my waist. “You need to be ready and I don’t know how to prepare you for what I’m going to need. What I’m going to...do.” Heat seemed to rise in his cheeks as fire burned in his eyes. His head bowed and when he looked at me again, that fiery look had been banked. “If you need more time, tell me.”

  Sweet heavens, I loved this male so much it hurt.

  “I don’t need time. I need you.”

  For the next hour or so, I showed Dain exactly how much I needed him.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  DAD AND MAYGAN SAT together on the couch and Arnou sat in the big, comfy chair close to the fireplace, full, steaming, coffee cups all around. The look on their faces suggested they hadn’t been discussing what had taken place the night before, which was fine with me. I was pretty certain I could live the rest of my long life without anyone ever bringing last night up again.

  Nope. They were all smiling, and not that smile marked by sadness and death and pity. Even the energy in the room was as far from sorrow as it could possibly be. Looking at Dad and Maygan, both of them with big, happy smiles plastered on their faces—they...beamed.

  Arnou looked up and grinned. When Dain held out his hand, Arnou rose from his chair and rather than shaking his son’s hand, he pulled him into a bear hug. He stood a good two inches taller than Dain, his immense shoulders wider by a couple of inches as well. If Rand had been built the same, I imagined he would’ve been quite intimidating.

  Anger flashed through my blood at the reminder of Rand and what he’d done to Dain. To Maygan.

  Arnou released Dain and held his hand out.

  “Jessy, this is...Arnou.” Dain gave me that “you know, my real father” look. There was no mistaking the love Dain held for this male: deep and pure and unconditional. I felt that love in my soul and that feeling put a stop to the sudden anger Rand caused to rise up in my throat.

  “I am so glad to meet you, Arnou.”

  He took my hand in both of his, holding me gently as his cherry-wood eyes stared into mine.

  “Holy hell, you are unbelievably beautiful.”

  I smiled as my cheeks flushed with heat. “Thank you.” Then I stepped back as Dain’s arm came around my shoulders.

  “Full moon tonight,” Dain remarked as he cocked his head. “Shouldn’t you be off breeding somewhere?”

  “Oh, I will be. I’ve got something lined up in San Antonio, but today is for family.”

  There was no doubt exactly where Dain inherited his dimples and eyes from. A perfect blend of his parents, Dain carried all the masculine stature of his Breeder father, complemented by a quietly captivating, bashful personality, mixed with Maygan’s beauty that softened the rugged lines of his face.

  “You better sit down, you two,” Maygan said. “We have something to tell you.” The smile widened on her face.

  “I already know.” Dain nodded at his mom, then at Arnou.

  A puzzled expression crossed Maygan’s face, as well as my dad’s and Arnou’s. I didn’t blame them. I had an idea there was something going on here and it wasn’t what Dain thought.

  “How could you know?” Maygan asked with a little laugh and I was positive that what she had planned on telling us was something new, not something dredged up from the past. Nobody beamed because of the past.

  Dain stepped away from me, took Maygan’s hand, and sat down next to her.

  “Uh... Dain, wait,” I said, but he didn’t listen as he focused on his mom.

  “Rand told me,” he answered quietly. “Arnou is my father.”

  Everyone in the room froze in stunned silence as they stared at Dain.

  “When?” Maygan’s eyes fluttered for a second, her voice barely a whisper. “When did he tell you this?

  “After the challenge,” Dain spoke slowly. “Before he died.”

  The only sounds in the large living room came from the fireplace—the crackle of wood as the flames burned away its energy. Maygan’s lips parted, though she didn’t say anything for the longest time.

  “He was still alive when you found him?”

  Dain looked at me and I understood the question in his eyes—should he tell her how Rand really died? I shook my head once. It was a burden he didn’t need to unload on his mom. She didn’t need to know her son had killed to ensure her happiness.

  “Yes. He was still alive, just barely. He lived only long enough to tell me, and then—he died.”

  “Dain, son,” Arnou spoke up. “Do you understand why your mother and I did what we did?”

  Dain nodded. “I think so.”

  “There was a time your mother loved Rand so much that she would do anything to make him happy.” Arnou sat down in the big chair, his elbows resting on his knees. “It wasn’t a decision we came to lightly or on the spur of the moment. And I understand that may sound bad because, yes, we planned ahead. A female in heat at the full moon is a rare gift. We waited to see if Rand would stay with her, but he didn’t. We did what we needed to do to ensure she would conceive.” Arnou rubbed his jaw. “Truthfully, there is no way to tell if you are my son or his, unless we have a DNA test done, because, well...”

  “There is no doubt. Rand was sterile. He had his own tests done.” The anger was back. The same anger I heard in Dain’s voice the night he’d told me about Rand. “He knew he couldn’t sire offspring and that sonofabitch never told my mom.” The words rolled out of his mouth on a deep, rumbling growl.

  Maygan stared first at Dain, then into the fire, her brown eyes narrowed, but the coffee cup in her hand stayed rock steady. That was, until she threw the piece of stoneware into the fireplace, and watched the shattered pieces bounce off the heavy, rock walls. Maygan stood up with her hands on her hips and looked around at the three startled men, whose eyes were as round as saucers.

  “Well,” she said, short and sweet as she brushed her hands together.

  I sucked in a breath. “I’m thinking that wasn’t what you wanted to tell us.” I lifted my eyebrows and chanced giving Maygan a little smile.

  “Nope.” Maygan shook her head, took a couple of deep breaths. “I’m pregnant. Seems a little anti-climactic now though, doesn’t it? Anyway, there it is.” She turned, walked through the living room, the dining room, and into the kitchen, where cupboard doors slammed and glass shattered while she growled out every cuss word she’d probably heard in her entire life.

  My dad was the only one who dared enter the kitchen after hurricane Maygan passed into a strangely quiet calm and once he cam
e back out, with one look, we all understood. Maygan was going to need some time alone.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  AFTER FEEDING LUCKY, again, playing with him, because, yeah...he was like an excitable puppy, I sent off a short text to DJ to let him know his colt was doing fine. Gunner called before the sun came up and talked with my dad about DJ’s condition. Comfort Community Hospital staff didn’t normally allow non-family members in to see patients in the middle of the night, but a strong alpha had no problem exerting a little influence over humans in order to protect his pack.

  DJ hadn’t known psycho cowboy’s plan until after the shooting started. Then, when he’d tried to interfere, GW pinned him against his truck until it was over. And he never saw the wolves that tore apart his so-called friends.

  Dad said there was a lot more to the conversation, but none of it was stuff I needed to hear.

  Which was fine. I had my own stuff to work through, thank you very much.

  Not waiting for DJ’s reply, I slipped Dain’s phone into my jacket pocket, left the barn, and stepped outside into the clear, chilly late afternoon sunshine. Once I moved to Albuquerque, I would miss this ranch. Miss the warm, earthy smells of dirt and hay and tall, brown grass. Miss the routine of caring for horses and cows and chickens. I’d even miss the crazy broken rooster waking me up well before dawn. But most of all I’d miss my dad, Maygan, and waking up wrapped in the arms of the only male I would ever love.

  The next six months were going to be hell, broken up once a month by a few days of heavenly bliss.

  I inhaled a deep breath and let it out on a long sigh.

  I’d get through this. And maybe, Dain and I needed this next six months to get to know each other and get over what we’d both gone through the night before, because I wasn’t the only one affected. Dain kept his promise and saved my life.

  I strolled across the yard, up to the fence rails, and watched as three males took turns measuring their manhood by how long they stayed seated on a horse that would rather they didn’t. The horses they’d rounded up had no training whatsoever, so Dad and Dain had a long, hard job ahead of them.