Chelsea pulled her pepper plant from its container so roughly that the stalk broke. She held it as if hoping Ruby could glue it back together, and her bottom lip quivered.
“Oh darling, it’s okay. That’s why everyone has two, you see?”
Chelsea nodded, sniffling a little, and Ruby showed her how to properly and carefully take her one remaining pepper out of its pot and introduce it to its new one. The bottom lip retracted, and Chelsea looked a lot happier once she’d received praise for the care she had taken, as well as a pointed acknowledgement that she no longer wanted to wear gloves.
“I can feel things better,” she explained. “I want to feel the mud on my hands, because it makes me feel closer to the plants.”
Ruby nearly cried at the depth of emotion Chelsea was expressing. Who knew the girl had a deep side?
The pepper plants stayed in the greenhouse. “It’s still a bit cold for them,” Ruby explained. She pointed to the thermometer inside the greenhouse. “Twenty is perfect for them, but it’s only ten outside overnight. They wouldn’t like that.”
“But they’ll go outside when it’s warmer?” Chelsea asked, clearly unhappy about her plant’s inability to grow to its full potential.
“Yes. Once it’s warmer, we can pop them in with the tomatoes.”
Exiting the sticky greenhouse, Ruby and the Pepper group wandered over to Potato and Onion groups, intrigued about what they were spending their time doing. Mel had them all on their knees, looking under the large leaves of the potato plants, checking for anything that might eat them. Frank laughed loudly when he pulled out a fat slug, holding it between a chubby thumb and forefinger and waggling it about in Becca’s face.
Becca’s expression was nothing short of disgusted, which made it all the more amusing. The whole class was giggling and squealing.
“Right, then,” Mel said after she and Ruby exchanged a glance. “The group that finds the biggest slug gets to water their plants first.”
An insignificant prize in Ruby’s opinion, but it seemed to get the kids invested. Tomato and Pepper groups sank to their knees too and began to search their own patch.
Mrs Denzie sat, one leg crossed over the other, her nose slightly wrinkled at the children’s activity. Ruby arched her eyebrow as the teacher huffed, rolled her eyes, and uncrossed her legs, re-crossing them the other way. Thank goodness her class hasn’t seemed to notice her disinterest. Ruby hoped they never would, and that their enthusiasm would continue until the end of their time with her.
Deciding to ignore the critical looks being thrown in the general direction of thirty pairs of mucky hands, Ruby walked around the bed and stepped up to Mel. “Good idea,” she said, her voice low.
Mel nodded and reached up to touch her cheek.
Ruby’s eyes went wide as Mel’s thumb brushed her skin, but when the thumb came away with a smear of brown on it, she felt her cheeks reddening. “Oh.”
“I mean, it was adorable,” Mel said, quiet enough so the kids couldn’t hear. “But not very professional.”
“Thank you.”
“All part of the service.” Stepping away again, Mel gave her a shy look.
Nothing would have pleased Ruby more than to have the opportunity to envelope Mel in her arms and press their lips together. Despite having only kissed once at the park, she missed the feeling and wanted to experience it again. But they were surrounded by thirty curious small people, most of them unwilling to refrain from asking questions. Mel wouldn’t mind that. She’d be quite happy to talk about our relationship with these kids. Should I be more like Mel?
Ruby had never really discussed her sexuality with anyone apart from her own daughters and her mother. The former conversation had been difficult; the girls had been younger, but old enough to understand what ‘gay’ meant. They’d heard the word used at school and had wondered why it was usually used in such a negative capacity. Ruby remembered having to explain to them that it shouldn’t be used in this way, but that her girls shouldn’t feel they had to stand up for her sexuality if they didn’t want people to know about it.
Mel wouldn’t have said that if she’d had kids. Ruby gazed at the beautiful woman with the shining strawberry-blonde hair and saw the spark in her, her joy for life, and her strength of character. She’d have told her own children, if she had them, to always stand up for what they believe in.
It made her insides ache. Mel was so wonderfully strong. She felt bad though, that she’d never been like that. She stood up for other people, where appropriate, of course, but she’d never had to stand up for herself. It wasn’t as if she had hidden her sexuality; her forays into the world of lesbianism hadn’t been brief or varied, but she’d never shouted about it. A bit of hand-holding down a street was all she had exposed to the world.
She could imagine Mel at Pride festivals, and not just because Mel had outright told the kids she’d attended the last one. She could see her tall frame, strong arms raised in joy at the drums and floats and dancers in the parade. She could see those green eyes full of life, surrounded by rainbow face paint, or her head adorned with a headband pronouncing Gay Is Okay, or some other phrase of love. She could imagine a whistle in her mouth, her hands joining with those of others as they walked together, a mass of love and trust and respect, through the roads of the city.
She could imagine her jumping about inside a tent, glow sticks held up in the air, her body brushing against other sweaty bodies as the music thumped around them.
The image was delicious and exciting.
After a few heartbeats, Ruby realised she had been staring. She snapped her gaze down to her boots and felt a blush creeping into her cheeks. She wasn’t sure if she’d been caught by anyone and didn’t particularly care to find out.
When she looked back up, Mel was pronouncing one of the children from Potato group the winner. The kid held up her slug, the body of it fatter than a sausage, and she went to place it into the fountain for the fish to have for dinner. Mel came over to Ruby and squeezed her shoulder briefly.
Mrs Denzie strode over to them as the kids were washing their hands and stamping their wellies on the concrete to shake off the mud. Her arms were folded, and her face was stony. Ruby immediately tensed and took a step backwards.
“Hi, great class today. What fun the kids had,” Mel said, apparently unaware of the aggression coming off Mrs Denzie in waves.
“It’s absolutely disgusting,” Mrs Denzie said. “You two… carrying on like it’s okay. We’ve had words before. I made my feelings about your… relationship very clear. And you carry on like it’s… normal.”
“Whatever you think, it’s really none of your business,” Mel said, keeping her voice level and reasonably soft.
“It absolutely is my business when you’re subjecting my class to… They’re innocent and impressionable and I do not wish for them to be… For them to think this is…” Clearly struggling to get her words out, Mrs Denzie’s hands were shaking; her jaw was clenched, and her mouth a tiny lemon-sucking hole.
Mel sighed deeply and put her fingers to her forehead. When she dropped her hand, her expression was frustrated. “You sound like a caveman.” She shook her head, obviously bewildered, and held her arms open. “We barely touch one another; we never say anything to one another, or to any of the children, that would be deemed inappropriate. The kids are having fun, they’re learning, they’re growing things they will be able to eat when harvest time arrives. I don’t see what the problem is.”
Some of the children had looked up, and Michael, followed by Becca and a few of the others, crept closer.
Ruby started to feel like a spare part. She chewed on her lip before taking a deep breath. “If you have a problem with the way we’re running the group, can I suggest you speak with my superior?”
“Oh, I’m sure he’s a proper lefty!” Mrs Denzie replied, her head tilted to the side and h
er gaze hard.
“What’s a lefty?” Michael asked, the children now close enough to hear everything.
“It’s someone who believes that all walks of life should be allowed. Including murderers and…” Mrs Denzie clearly had a whole list of “lowlifes” she intended on naming but had decided that the list was too extensive for little ears.
“No, that’s not what a lefty is,” Ruby said, speaking directly to Michael rather than give his teacher any attention. “It’s someone who is open to new ideas, who thinks all people should be treated equally.” Ruby felt her own hands shaking so folded her arms, tucking her fingers under her elbows. “Black people, gay people, disabled people, people with learning difficulties…” She realised what she had said and looked over at Mel, her gut clenching.
The smile on Mel’s face made everything fall away: her fears, her nerves, and her worry. Is that approval I can see in those green eyes?
“What’s the problem with that?” Michael asked, folding his arms too. Some of his classmates followed suit, copying his stance.
“The problem is,” Mrs Denzie began, “that you are far too young to learn about things like that.” She hissed the last three words, as if they were some kind of swear phrase.
“Like what?” Michael seemed appalled. “I can talk about being black if I want to.” It wasn’t a question, and Mrs Denzie seemed surprised and frustrated in equal measures.
“Of course you… That’s not what I meant.”
“What did you mean?” Frank asked, as if he had suddenly discovered an assertiveness he never knew he had.
“These two… women. They are obviously in a… a lesbian relationship.” Her nose crinkled, and Ruby had the overwhelming urge to laugh. She really has come from a cave. “And they should not be… exposing that to young minds.”
“Are you girlfriends?” Chelsea asked, her words plain and without criticism.
Ruby looked at Mel, who nodded to her, an encouraging gesture. “Yes. We are girlfriends,” Ruby said.
Chelsea’s face split into a wide grin. “That’s really nice.”
Michael whooped and clapped. A few of the other kids did too.
Becca eyed them both, her gaze more suspicious. “But are you gay though?”
Mel nodded kindly at the girl. “I’m gay. I told you that a while ago.”
Becca nodded and then turned to Ruby. One eyebrow crept towards her severe fringe.
“I’m gay too.” The admission left Ruby’s shoulders floppy and loose. A bubble of relief rose up inside her, and she felt like laughing again. She didn’t care that she’d come out to the kids, and she didn’t care what they thought, not really. She did care that Mel’s approving look had intensified and that the light shining from her eyes was all for Ruby.
“Awesome.” Michael nodded and looked between the two of them. “But you’re not going to snog in front of us.” Again, the statement, accompanied by several fake-retching noises from the class, was not a question.
“That’d be weird, wouldn’t it?” Mel said, and they all laughed. When they had quietened, Mel looked around the group. “We’re here to teach you to grow things and make sure you have a nice time. That’s all.”
Ruby stood silently, wondering what Mrs Denzie was going to say. If she’d been sitting, she’d have been on the edge of her seat.
Mel’s smile widened. “Look, you seem like a cool bunch, right?”
Cheers erupted briefly.
“So, do you have a problem with me being gay?”
A chorus of “No!” rang through the garden.
“And do you have a problem with Ruby being gay?”
An echoing “No”.
“And you don’t have an issue with us being together?”
A pause of contemplation stretched between them all. It gave Mrs Denzie the perfect opportunity to interject. “See? They’re so uncomfortable with it. You’ve brought something up that they’re simply too young to understand.”
“We’re not too young,” Becca said.
“I’ve had three girlfriends,” Michael said. “I understand what love is.”
“I’ve told you before about your habit of voicing your opinions, Michael. Any more of this nonsense and I’ll be explaining to Ruby and Mel exactly what happened before Christmas.”
Michael shrank away, but the look in his eyes was defiant. Ruby nearly laughed again.
“You’ve had three girlfriends?” Mel asked in amazement, and Michael nodded proudly. “Quite an achievement. I hope you treated them all well.”
Michael folded his arms. “Of course I did.” Three of the girls, including Chelsea, nodded their agreement.
Mrs Denzie spluttered. “It’s hardly the same. Your little relationships are nothing like you’ll experience when you’re an adult, Michael.”
Michael stared at her. “That’s not fair. I told you, I know what love is.” He turned to Mel. “Are you in love with Ruby?”
Ruby nearly fell over. Her insides twisted uncomfortably.
Mel considered him. “What do you think?”
“I think you are.” Michael nodded once and then looked around at his classmates. “Who thinks Mrs Denzie’s being a ninny, and being nasty to Ruby and Mel because they’re gay?”
“Now, come on,” Ruby said gently. “That’s a very rude thing to say.” However much I agree with him.
“Sorry,” Michael said, deflating a bit. His lips twisted in thought. “Who thinks Mrs Denzie should be nice to Ruby and Mel, and not be nasty to them because they’re gay?”
A unanimous murmur of agreement flooded through the group.
“That’s settled, then.” Michael looked overwhelmingly pleased with himself.
Mrs Denzie looked anything but. Steam was practically coming out of her ears, and her face had taken on a beetroot quality. She stamped her foot—actually stamped it, her fashionably Wellington boot making an imprint in the edge of the grass. “I’m sorry, I disagree. I’m going to have to go to the dean.” She narrowed her eyes. “I’m sure he will be incredibly interested to know that I saw you… doing inappropriate things… in the greenhouse when we arrived.” She glared at Michael. “I’m sure you will back up my story.”
He stared in horror, his fingers sliding sweatily in and out of each other. Then he looked down at the ground. He hadn’t agreed, but definitely hadn’t said he wouldn’t.
“Inappropriate things? What on earth are you talking about?” Mel asked.
And then it hit Ruby. Being caught in a compromising position with Mel, in full view of the children and the rest of the university, would end her career for sure. The volcano in Mrs Denzie’s eyes was tempered by triumph when she locked her gaze with Ruby’s and realised she was onto a winner. She wouldn’t hold back any illicit details of what she had apparently seen. No way. The glee transforming her face made that abundantly clear. And that would be it for Ruby. Her reputation would be left in shreds. And her job… the job she needed to pay the bills, feed her daughters… Well, she could kiss that good-bye.
“People like you should not be allowed to work with children, and by the time I’m through, you’ll never work with them again.” She turned on her heel and left the garden area, the door into the main building thumping behind her.
Everyone stared at one another. Mel patted Michael’s shoulder as his face dropped. He clearly felt responsible for their teacher going off in a rage. His gaze was locked on the door, until Mel’s hand started a back-and-forth rub and he seemed to jolt out of his reverie.
“Thank you for standing up for us,” Mel murmured to him, and he looked a bit brighter at that, exchanging glances with his group of friends.
“I didn’t.” A tear trickled down his face. Then he looked up and caught Ruby’s gaze. “Um… I don’t want her to tell you what happened last year.”
“That’s okay,�
� Mel continued to rub his shoulder. “It’s private?”
Michael nodded.
“I’ll stick my fingers in my ears.”
That appeared to ease his worries, and his cheerfulness returned.
Time stretched, and the kids became restless. “Has she just left us?” Becca’s sensible voice carried across the group.
A swirling began in Ruby’s insides. She felt like she was going to vomit.
“I’ll go check.” Mel gave them all a thumbs up, as if to let them know she was okay, before jogging out of the garden and into the university building.
Ruby shifted her feet from one side to the other but couldn’t meet each child’s gaze when they looked at her.
Frank shuffled over to her and hesitantly put his hand on her elbow. He was shorter than his classmates, and pudgier too, but the look in his eye made her wonder whether he had a sensitive father. “It’s all right, Ruby,” he said, smiling up at her.
She tried to smile back and felt everything melting just a bit at the caring look in his eyes. She placed her hand atop his, and they all waited for Mel to return.
Mel came back, a few minutes later. “Looks like she went to the dean, but now she’s gone. Called a taxi apparently and left campus.”
Ruby stared at her feet. She allowed Mel to organise the children and was faintly aware of her phoning the school to let them know what had happened.
What am I going to do? If I lose my job, that’ll be it: the house, my daughters all set to go to university. I won’t have the money to send either of them. My lovely car, the dinners out we have, the nice things we have to eat. Even Jasmine’s blooming pasta.
And the repercussions for Mel will be no better. I’m sure she’ll be booted off her course after being seen engaging in inappropriate activity in a public place. Maybe the university will contact her employer too. They’d have to. Her course was linked to her job. Oh God, what a mess!
It was warm in the garden, but shivers brushed along her shoulders. She clasped her hands together and yanked a smile onto her face when Mel approached.
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