Catching Blue Jay (Oklahoma Hearts Book 1)

by Jacy Braegan

  Catching Blue Jay

  an Oklahoma Hearts novel - Book 1

  Jacy Braegan

  Catching Blue Jay

  March 2019

  Copyright © 2019 by Jacy Braegan

  Kindle Edition

  Cover Art by: Whimsical Reverie – www.whimsicalreverie.design

  Cover Photography by: Francesco Cura (Cura Photography)

  Edited by: Stephanie Carrano

  Proofreading by: Jill Wexler

  All Rights Reserved

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without written permission from Jacy Braegan at www.jacybraegan.com.

  Published in the United States of America

  This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental.

  To my husband and kids. Without you, my dreams would not exist.

  Acknowledgements

  First and foremost, So much love for my best friend, Amanda. Without her, I would never have made it this far. This is where all your support, faith, and friendship have led me, and I will be forever grateful.

  Lots of thanks to my mentors and friends, Nora and Kyleen. Your advice and support have meant the world to me!

  To the readers who have been so patiently waiting and supporting me while I wrote and polished up this book, thank you!! Just seeing you all excited really kept me from heading over the proverbial edge!

  To my editor, Stephanie, and my proofreader, Jill, for who this might have been a bit of mess to read! You guys rock!

  And last but most certainly not least, to Ashe, Abigail, and Baylin. Through panic attacks and frustrations, you guys have been the lights at the end of my dark tunnel and I will never forget the part of my journey you've been on with me so far, and the parts you've yet to play. Lots of love!!

  Author’s Notes

  The song “Cherry Lane” and the band Downward Spiral are the property of K.M. Neuhold. They can be found in Face the Music, book one in her Replay series.

  Prologue

  June, 10 years before

  Sounds of the video game fill my room. Even though we’re playing one of our favorite games, there’s no way to fight the sadness that’s building inside me. With each passing minute, I know our time is ending. It isn’t fair he’s moving. There’s so much we haven’t done. There’s so much I haven’t done. There’s so much to tell him that I’ve been too much of a coward to say before. Can I bring myself to even mention it before he leaves? Am I that brave?

  Bam! My entire body jumps as the controller he’s been holding slams into the table in front of us. I turn my head to look at my scowling friend as he exclaims, “This totally sucks. I don’t want to move.”

  That’s a pain we share. Hitting pause on my controller, I lean over to set it on the table. We’re sitting in the futon under my loft bed gaming, so I turn my body toward him. Apparently, we’re both having the same thoughts about him moving. I take in the gorgeous guy beside me and let out a soft sigh. “I don’t want you to go either, but what choice do we have? It’s not like we could convince our parents to let you stay. ‘You’ll make new friends’ they’ll say. Your mom never liked me anyway,” I say with a frown.

  He reaches out to take my hand and give it a squeeze before sitting up, turning to face me. The look of pain in those blue eyes of his almost does me in because it’s hard to take. No doubt the same pain is reflected in my own eyes. It feels like my heart is breaking inside my chest as I realize for the first time, just how much I love this guy beside me. God, will I survive this? I hope so.

  My gaze drops from his, so he can’t see all the emotions I know I cannot hide from him. He’s always been able to read me like an open book. If I let him take one look into my eyes, all my secrets will be out on the table. This seriously fucking sucks.

  The cuckoo clock my mom loves so much goes off downstairs. Our time is up. He’s about to walk out of my life and our only contact will be phone calls and emails. Maybe we’ll chat over our video game systems. Am I really going to let him walk away without him knowing my little secret? Okay, my big secret. It feels unfair to keep it hidden from the person who knows me best.

  “I guess it’s time to go before Mom comes down here to get me herself… you know she’ll do it,” he says. My dark brown gaze lifts from my lap back to meet his as I take a deep breath. Man up… you can do this. Instinct drives me to reach out and wrap my hand around the nape of his neck. At the feel of my hand on his neck, Jayson lifts his gaze to meet mine. His brow furrows before I lean forward to press my lips against his own before a single question can cross his lips. Time seems to stand still as I wait for his reaction. It takes about ten seconds before he gasps and leans back with wide eyes, forcing my hand to fall from his neck. I swallow at the look of absolute shock on his handsome face.

  “I…” My voice falters before finishing my statement. I clear my throat to try to speak past the lump of dread that is forming. “I have to tell you something…” My voice trails off as he jumps up from the futon and hurries for the door. “No, don’t go... wait!”

  He runs from the room, slamming the door behind him. I drop my head to my hands as a sigh slips from me. Realization that I didn’t get to say goodbye hits me. Guess that awkward kiss is the only goodbye I’ll have to remember. Clenching my hands into fists, I fight the urge to go running after him.

  Moving to my window, I watch my best friend escape the house and jump on his bike. He pedals as fast as he can to get away from here. He hadn’t even said anything about the kiss. I lift my hand to place it over the glass as if I can reach out and touch him as he rides away. A tear slides down my cheek as I speak to no one, “Good bye, Jay.”

  Chapter 1

  Aidan

  January, 10 years later

  Words are just tumbling out of me. Even though I finished my work earlier in the day, I’m still locked inside my room. Words of star fields and spaceships fill my screen. I hope that today’s story will be a popular one and get lots of views on my blog. My Star Trek fan fiction stories are the highlight of my day and help me unwind from spending hours working on and debugging code.

  Putting the final touches on my story, I hear a banging at the door behind me, making me jump in surprise. I’d been so lost in my work, I didn’t realize that the day had completely passed. My best friend slash roommate yells at me through the door, “Hey loser! Time’s up! It’s Friday, and it’s time to get off work.”

  Letting out a soft laugh, I roll my eyes as I hit publish on my story, releasing it my site for public consumption and for my newsletter to send it to my subscribers. Gosh, Clay is crazy. How are we friends again? Shutting down my machine, I realize that it’s my fault. That’s what I get for asking him to remind me when to get off work. Yes, I know. Working too much results in burnout, but sometimes I get lost in my work or in my writing. Time just slips away. It’s not like I’ve got a guy waiting for me right now. Relationships haven’t seemed to go my way lately.

  Unlocking my bedroom door, I peer out at my friend. He leans a cocked hip into one hand making me raise a dark brow towards the ceiling. He bats his eyelashes at me, and in faux innocence, he asks, “What?”

  “You’re completely insane, you know that, right?”

  “Not clinically, no. Now come on, you’ve been locked in your cave all day and I’m starving. Let’s eat. Lasagna should be ready by now.”

  My mouth waters at the mention of lasagna. Living with a chef is awesome and his lasagna is my favorite. He sure knows how to get to me. After
following him into the kitchen like a puppy with his tongue hanging out, the sweet smell of spicy sauce hits my nose. He pulls out the steaming pan of cheesy goodness. Going to need a run tonight, I can see it now. This food is fit for gods to eat, seriously.

  “While we wait on this to cool long enough to eat, I have a huge, huge favor to ask of you,” Clay says as he turns to face me. Uh oh… this can’t be good. His big brown eyes crinkle at the corners to plead with me. When Clay gets out the puppy dog eyes, I know I’m doomed. Turning him down is like telling a kid there’re no presents on Christmas morning. Never tell a kid that.

  Dropping my head into my hand, I sigh before grumbling out, “What is it now? I don’t want to go clubbing this weekend. I’ve got that big project deadline coming up and I want to finish early.”

  He shakes his head empathically at me. “No clubbing, I know. It’s just. Okay, check it. I RSVP’d to my friend’s wedding back when me and Joey were a thing. Since Joey broke up with me, I need a date to act as my plus one. You know I hate going to these events stag. I want you to go with me and be my plus one. It’ll be free food in between work… like a break.”

  Ugh. I hate weddings and he knows this. I really don’t want to go, he’s right about one thing. I do know how he feels about going to these things alone. Despite his flamboyant nature, sometimes the brooding, insecure guy comes out. It’s best he’s not left alone at such an important event, just in case. Plus, he’s still reeling from Joey’s break-up from the month before. He’d been blindsided by his boyfriend cheating on him. Naturally, it’s taking him a while to get over it. My best friend really needs me, so going is my only option despite my reservations.

  Releasing my head, I fold my arms over my chest, not hinting at my decision. For what he’s asking of me, he deserves to wait before he finds out I’m going. “Who’s getting married?”

  Clay puts a pan with a loaf of open-faced garlic bread under the broiler before turning to grab a spatula from the container next to the stovetop. Moving to the island where I’m sitting, he sections the lasagna into portions, answering without looking up at me, “My friend Blake is marrying his boyfriend, Jayson. They’ve been engaged for so long we’re all surprised they set a date. You’ve met Blake.”

  Ah, Blake. He isn’t my favorite of Clay’s other friends, but he doesn’t come around too often, thankfully. With a roll of my eyes and a long, drawn-out sigh, I glare at him. “Yes, I’ll go, but you owe me.”

  My lithe friend spins around in delight and wiggles his slender hips in celebration. His antics almost make me laugh, but I settle for smirking at him as he speaks, “You won’t regret it.”

  Oh, I’ll probably regret it, but maybe I’ll find a hook-up and it’ll make the day worth it. If not, I’ll just have Clay make it up to me. There’s a WizardCon coming up. Maybe I’ll make him go with me to that. He’ll hate it, but like me with those puppy eyes, I only have to give him my sad look and he’ll go for sure. As Clay pulls the garlic bread out and serves us both, I feel better about going to the wedding with him.

  Chapter 2

  Jayson

  Nerves quickly take me over. It’s hard to believe we’re getting married, finally. It’d taken so long for Blake to set a date that I thought we’d never make it here. Add that to me being in a church, and it’s a recipe for anxiety to run through me. How’d I let him convince me that this was a good idea? I know the photography will be amazing, but it’s a freaking church. Forcing myself to inhale several breaths, I speak quietly to the empty room, “No one will hurt you here. You’re safe.”

  That mantra repeats in my head a few times before a knock on the door draws my attention from my thoughts. Looking up, my best friend Luca comes in with my fiancé’s best man. I give an inward sigh even though my lips curve to give Russell a smile.

  “How’s he doing, Russ?”

  Russ lets out a boisterous laugh before grinning like a loon at me. He’s always the comedic one of the group, or so he likes to believe of himself. “Blake sent me to check and make sure you had showed up.”

  I roll my eyes, but laugh anyways, “I’m not the one everyone was worried about not showing up.”

  It’s the truth. After it had taken so long to nail down a date, the fear he wouldn’t show up for our wedding is immense. Luc had already checked to make sure he arrived for me, so this is just icing on the cake to reduce my worries. Our wedding is happening. By the end of the day, I’ll be a married man. Not even twenty-five and all my goals are coming true. This is the day I’ll remember for the rest of my life.

  Another knock comes at the door and it opens to show our wedding planner, Amanda, sticking her head in. She gives me a big grin and a thumb up. “It’s time!”

  We all head out the door, with me pulling up the rear. Russ heads toward the front doors of the church where my future husband waits. He wants to walk down the aisle. Luca leads me to meet the preacher Blake chose to officiate before patting me on the back in brotherly comfort. Blake had wanted to go all out, and it’s, indeed, stunning. While a quiet backyard wedding fit me perfectly, Blake had his own dreams that were best just to give into. It’s just how our relationship goes.

  The preacher takes a few moments to give me some final instructions before we move to stand before the altar. Feeling eyes piercing my back, I feel the hair on the nape of my neck rising. That’s a weird feeling to have on my wedding day. Turning around to the people sitting in the pews, I glance over our friends and family; well, his family anyway. I glance over Clay and the man he’s got with him before jerking my eyes back for a moment. That man almost looks like an old friend I’d had ages ago. It makes me wonder what happened to him. The thought goes through my head momentarily before the music begins to play. The sounds makes me turn my blue eyes to the double doors of the church where Russ starts to come down the aisle.

  It only takes an instant to know something is wrong. The grin usually on Russ’s face is absent. My breath catches in my throat as he nears me. What the hell is going on? He’s going to the wrong spot. He’s supposed to go to the right, not approach me. Panic wells inside me as I peek around him. A slight shake of his head brings my attention back to him as he reaches out to take my hand. He slips a piece of paper slips into my hand before quietly murmuring, “He’s gone.”

  The mumbling of the guests covers my gasp of shock as I hear his low words. I don’t understand. Luca and Russell had both assured me he was here. How the hell can he be gone? My body is shaking, and deep inside, anxiety is welling up and setting in. Luca pulls me out of the sanctuary as he recognizes the signs of me falling into a panic attack. As soon as we’re out of view of the crowd, Russell begins to explain. Stalking further away from the door as it closes behind us, it’s only a few moments before I whirl on my best friend.

  “What the fuck? What the actual fuck, man? You said he was here! You fucking promised me he was here!”

  Luca lets me rant for a while before shaking his head. His brown eyes meet mine, filling with apology. “He was here. I wouldn’t lie to you about that. I don’t know what happened.”

  Remembering the paper now balled up in my fist, I sigh softly before sliding down the wall until my butt hits the tiled floor. It doesn’t matter if it’s clean or dirty. Unfolding the paper in my hands, Blake’s familiar handwriting greets me. I shut my eyes to let my courage build inside me so I can read the words on that page.

  Jayson,

  I wish I had the heart to tell you this to your face. I can’t go through with our wedding. I truly thought I could give you this wish of yours, but I can’t. I sent Russell to check on you, so I could make my escape. I knew if I tried to leave while he was in the room that I wouldn’t make it out the door. He’d guilt me into staying and you don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve a husband that isn’t sure he can make it through his vows without puking all over your shoes. Vows… something else I don’t have. Even now, I have no clue what I’d even say to you if we were standing in front of each other at
that altar. I know this is painful, but it’s for the best. I still love you, but marriage just isn’t for me. I’m so sorry for hurting you like this. I’m going away for a while. I hope you forgive me.

  Love always,

  Blake

  Love always? Who the fuck does he think he is? How can he still love me and not tell me all this to my face? He apparently doesn’t know what real love is. If he’d brought his concerns to me, we’d not be in this situation right now. I let my head fall hard against the wall behind me as I ball the note up in my fist once more to throw it across the hallway. “He’s left me, Luc.”

  My best friend slides down the wall to sit beside me. His arm wraps around my shoulder to draw me into his side. Tears fall down my cheeks at the affection of my best friend. Turning my face into his chest, the dam bursts and my tears soak his jacket. I don’t know how long we sit there. I don’t know who, or if anyone, walks by or if they even say anything. I’m completely lost to my misery.

  Chapter 3

  Aidan

  Clay leads me down the aisle to the seats he’s spied for us. We’re early since he wants to get the best seats to watch everything and see what they picked for the wedding party to wear. He’s shamelessly addicted to fashion, but doesn’t listen when anyone tells him that not everyone is. He’s dolled up to the nines. His suit is tailored to fit his sleek frame, and he’s color-coordinated from his head to his toes… including his nail polish. There’s no trading this man for anything in the world, though. I love him just the way he is.

  We take our seats and I raise the wedding program we’d been given to my eyes. Blake Wyatt and Jayson Martin are the names of the two grooms. I go to peruse the rest of the program before snapping my eyes back to the second groom’s name. No way. It must be another Jayson Martin. My old best friend and first crush had moved clear across the country to the East Coast. He can’t be back, can he? Plus, he isn’t gay. He’d ran from me when I’d kissed him when we were fifteen. Then, even though we’d promised to keep in touch, I never heard from my Jayson again.