In His Sights: A Brothers Synn Novel

by Victoria Light

  But how could I justify that when every single cell in my body knew the opposite was true? I liked men, and the fact that I'd denied myself of that simple fact for so long was ripping me to shreds. And the reality was that every time I looked at Sylus, every moment I encountered his scent lingering in the hallways of my house, every time I heard his voice, this insane feeling of desire swelled up inside of me.

  This past week had been torture on a level I'd never known before. Just thinking about it was enough to get my cock hard. I could feel it springing to life now; there was no fighting it.

  God, it was conflicting to feel guilty about getting turned on and to still have that voice telling me that what I felt was wrong. That it was unnatural. That it made me less of a man.

  "Hey."

  I quickly righted myself as Sylus's voice drew me out of my thoughts, plunging my hips below the surface. He was sitting on the end of one of the pool recliners, his towel draped around the back of his neck. He was hunched over his thighs, his forearms resting on his legs.

  His muscles were all sculpted and pumped up from the lifting, and it drove me fucking wild. I felt like an animal, a starving lion tempted by a meal I couldn't have. All I could do was sit and look and endure the burning hunger. My cock was rock hard now. It was like I was a teenager again, helpless against popping fucking boners in the locker room while changing for PE.

  How long had he been there?

  I swam up to the edge of the pool. "Look, I completely understand if you want to get out of here. That's a line I shouldn't have crossed. If you want to resign, I'll make sure that you get the full payment for the job."

  "I'm not gonna resign," he said. "It's weird, getting apologies from you. Didn't think you were capable of remorse."

  "Of course I am."

  He stood. "How do you wanna do this thing? We just gonna jump right into it, or what?"

  "What do you mean?"

  "Your lesson."

  My jaw dropped.

  "Seriously?"

  He glared at me. "Do I look like I'm joking? I get it. You're in a tough situation, and I accept that I'm really the only man in any position to offer assistance." He sniffed and rubbed the stubble on his chin. "So I'll help you out. Get you comfortable being physical with another man. But just so we're clear, this is strictly professional."

  "Yeah." My heart thundered in my chest.

  "So... Uh... When do we do this?"

  "Does tonight work for you?"

  "It's not like I've got anywhere I need to be."

  "Tonight, then."

  "Alright."

  "Okay."

  We stared at each other awkwardly until Sylus finally turned and left without saying another word. I floated at the edge of the pool, my cock throbbing harder than I'd ever felt it before. Holy shit. This was actually going to happen.

  Strictly professional.

  Definitely. Yeah, I thought Sylus was hot as fuck, but that was a purely physical attraction. It didn't mean anything. What I wanted was a man I could trust to get me comfortable with this stuff.

  "Jesus," I muttered. It was like with each second that went by, the reality of the situation became that much more real.

  "He's going to what?" Audrey's voice blared out of my cell phone. I was lying on the couch in my studio.

  It took a good half an hour to get her to believe that I wasn't fucking with her.

  "Why are you asking me for advice on how to suck his dick?" she grumbled. "Isn't that what he's going to teach you?"

  "Yeah, but... I don't know."

  "Is this really such a good idea?" she asked. "You're saying it's professional. There's nothing else there. But weren't you the one who said you were into the guy?"

  "Nah," I said. "I'm not into him. Not, like, into him. Just... You know."

  "You just want to suck his cock."

  "Yeah. Exactly!"

  She was quiet for a moment before busting into a fit of laughter. "Oh, Jesus. This is just too crazy. Well, I guess I told you to go for it..."

  "Yeah. This is all your fault."

  We both laughed.

  "I don't really have much advice to give you," she said. "You've got a dick. Just do whatever you think you'd want done to yourself. Don't bite him. Unless he's into that."

  I suddenly got an image of Sylus pinning me naked onto the bed, my hands tied as he raked his teeth across my neck. I shivered.

  "But seriously, Chris? If you do have feelings for him, this isn't the best way to go about things."

  "Hey, hey. I told you, there's nothing. Throw any other hot guy into my house and I would've asked him the same thing. You know me."

  "How does he feel about it?"

  I switched the phone to my other ear. "Strictly professional, those were his words."

  "How would you feel if he did feel something more?"

  "Strictly professional, Audrey, alright? We both agreed. There's an understanding."

  Did I want something more to happen?

  No way. Sylus was my employee. There was no way anything could happen between us.

  10

  SYLUS

  "Hold on, hold on," Bau said. There was a moment of silence before a loud crack. Even through the phone’s speaker I could identify the caliber of the rifle being fired. 5.56, probably an M4 carbine. "Sweet. Nailed it. Man, Sylus. I'd say I wish you could be out here at the range with Virgil and I, but it sounds like you're having a fine time over there."

  "This is far beyond anything I could've expected," I said.

  "Didn't heed my warning, huh?"

  "I'm not falling for the client. I'm just... doing him a free service."

  Bau laughed. "Fuck. More like he's doing you a free service. You said he was straight, but he's gay. You say you're not falling for him. What's next?"

  "Don't worry about me. I'm just helping out a guy in need."

  "I mean, shit. If you're getting a blowjob out of it, why not? Hold on, hold on." Another pause and a gunshot. I heard Virgil hoot in the background.

  "Seriously, though, Bau. It's not about that. I really want to help this guy out."

  "And you aren't falling for him?"

  "He's been in the closet for his whole life, suppressing everything. His parents were totally against him being queer. He's never had what we had. And now I'm the very first man he was able to tell. He needs someone to look out for him, help him get on his feet, you know?"

  Or on his knees.

  I was ignoring the question, I knew that.

  After ending the call, I paced around my room and went out to the balcony for some fresh air. I spent ten minutes staring at a single wisp of cloud that curled in the otherwise clear late-afternoon sky. A distant airplane streaked across, leaving a vapor trail behind it like a line of chalk. I went back inside and checked the time on my phone. I'd done covert, highly dangerous sniper ops that’d made me less nervous than what I’d be doing tonight.

  There was no reason for me to be feeling this way. It wasn't like I'd never gotten a blowjob before, but the anticipation was extreme. I kept seeing him in my mind, down on his knees in front of me with the shape of my cock silhouetted over his face. My fantasies progressed, and I imagined the feeling of his lips on me as he took his very first taste of a man. I was eager to show him how. I couldn't wait to experience him.

  I'm just helping him out. That's it.

  My cock throbbed against my underwear.

  "Fuck me," I groaned, dropping back onto the bed.

  I'd really gotten into some shit with this. Who the fuck was I trying to fool? I was falling for Chris. Against every goddamn red flag, every warning, every reason I knew that should've prevented me from feeling this way, I was completely fucking helpless to it. Somehow, in this short amount of time, this pain-in-the-ass, bratty fucking rock star had managed to capture my heart.

  But it would go no further than this. I would complete the job and move along. Anything more would simply be a fantasy. It didn't matter how either of us fe
lt I knew nothing good could from expecting anything more. He and I were from completely different worlds.

  When I left my room to meet Chris I felt the same as the first time I'd been dispatched for a mission, all anticipation and nerves. He was waiting for me in the living room, sitting on the couch with his acoustic guitar. He wasn't playing, just holding it on his lap as he stared blankly at the TV, which wasn't even switched on.

  When he heard me coming, he set the guitar against the couch and stood up. He looked as if he were dressed for a performance--or maybe a first date. I was just in my old USMC sweats and a t-shirt.

  "Still want to do this?" I asked.

  His face went red. "I'm scared as hell. But I'm not backing down."

  "Okay." Nodding, I sat on the couch.

  Chris didn't move toward me. He scratched the back of his neck and tapped his foot. "Shit, I could use a drink right now." Finally, he sat down next to me.

  I had to admit, I could definitely have used one, too.

  "Tip-toeing around never helps," I said, and I tugged my shirt off and draped it over the back of the couch. "I'm just gonna get into this."

  Chris sat very still, like a mouse trying to avoid being seen by a predator. He stared straight ahead, avoiding looking at me. Next, I pushed my sweatpants and underwear down together, and just like that I was completely naked. I settled back into the couch, taking a few deep breaths. My cock made my excitement very obvious.

  "S-should I, uh... should I get naked, too?" Chris was still keeping his gaze averted.

  "You can if you want to."

  He exhaled loudly. "Alright. Fuck it." He stood up and stripped. First went his leather jacket, falling onto a chair next to me. Then the v-neck t-shirt, exposing rippling muscles and goose-bumped flesh. A light wisp of a happy trail ran down from his belly button and disappeared beneath a large, silver belt-buckle. With a jangle and the swish of leather, he had that opened. He drew down his fly in what felt like one tooth at a time. Click, click, click, click.

  His cowboy boots were still on. With the top of his pants splayed open, he kicked them off, sending them thudding to the floor. Then, finally, he pushed his jeans down his hips, crumpling them at his ankles. He shook his leg to get rid of them. He took another deep breath and turned to face me.

  My cock throbbed as I took in the sight of him. My heart quickened. My pulse was so strong that my cock swayed slightly with every heartbeat. His underwear was still on and I could see the shape of his erection pushing up the dark fabric. He stood there, still as a statue.

  I got up and walked to him. His fists were balled up tightly at his sides, like he was ready to lash out at any second. I could see that he was fighting against himself and all the things that had been holding him captive.

  "You ready?" I asked.

  "Don’t ask me."

  Slowly, I reached out and brought my hand to his cheek, touching the fading bruises there. He flinched, but his body still remained rigid. With my left hand, I clasped his forearm and moved my grip down to his wrist and finally to his clenched fist. I held it, and pushed my right hand around the back of his neck.

  A tingle crossed through my entire body as I felt the warmth of his skin on my fingers. My cock pushed against his, separated by only the thin barrier of underwear. He flinched again, and I could feel his cock responding against mine.

  Carefully, gently, with the finesse of a man dismantling an armed explosive, I brought Chris's lips to mine.

  His lips were sweet and soft, and as he slowly returned the kiss I could sense him relaxing. His fist unfurled, and I slipped my hand into his. He'd had his eyes firmly shut, and he opened them now and looked at me. The fear in his eyes was unmistakable, but I could see it was slowly melting away.

  "There," I said. "Ain't so hard, right?"

  "Can I... try that again?"

  "Hey. It's your lesson."

  He leaned in and gave it another go. The hesitation was leaving. He was getting bolder, wanting more. I pulled him tighter and felt his tongue brush against my lips, and I met him with mine.

  Jesus, I was really enjoying this. It was bad.

  "Good?" I asked, pulling back just enough to cut it short. Chris kissed at the air, obviously wanting more.

  "Really good," he said, grinning sheepishly.

  "How the hell do you write your music when you've never even kissed a person before?"

  "I've got a good imagination."

  I felt his hand press against my thigh, and then slowly, slowly, it moved to meet my cock.

  "You're bigger than me," he said as he stroked me. "Wow. This is... This is weird."

  "Weird?"

  "Having someone else's dick in my hand."

  I chuckled. "Why don't you get on your knees."

  He looked at me with a glare that seemed defiant, and for a moment I thought he was going to tell me to fuck off. But instead, he lowered in front of me. My heart was hammering. His eyes dropped to my cock, widening for a moment. I saw his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

  "Damn," he said. "This is the first time I've ever seen another man's cock in person."

  He continued to stroke me, milking out a glimmer of precome that dripped down my head. Then, to my shock, he quickly stopped it with his tongue. I gasped in surprise.

  "Shit. Was that alright?" he asked.

  I grunted. "Yeah. Sorry, just wasn't expecting it."

  He licked me again tentatively, watching my reaction. I'd fantasized about this, and now it was really happening. He gripped me at the base, holding my throbbing excitement steady with his fist. Then his eyes flicked up to meet mine, and he drew his lips around me.

  11

  CHRIS

  His cock was pure heat in my mouth, pure living heat. I could feel every pulse of reaction to what I was doing, every throb of excitement.

  This was fun.

  "Am I doing it right?" I asked

  "You're doing great," he said, his voice a low drawl. He was looking at me in a way that I'd never been looked at before, dream-like, barely in control. It reminded me of the looks I got from fans in the front row during my shows. It was like he was under a spell—my spell.

  I wasn't scared anymore. I was having a damn good time.

  Next, I flicked my tongue across his balls. How would he like that?

  Sylus grunted and pulled me closer, gripping my head by pushing his fingers through my hair. Apparently, he liked it a lot. I stroked him with my hand and continued to taste his balls with my tongue.

  "You sure aren't having much trouble with this," he said, his voice strained. "There isn't much I'm gonna be able to teach you..."

  At that moment, I realized that there was no way I could do this just once. I was hooked on his cock. I was hooked on his kiss. I was hooked on Sylus fuckin' Synn.

  "There's a whole shitload of stuff you can teach me," I said.

  "Yeah? Like what?"

  "I don't know," I said, stroking him harder. "All the shit I've never done. I have a lot of catching up to do. I've never tried putting anything... inside..."

  Sylus groaned and his cock flexed in my grip, and I was startled by a warm spurt across my face. His thick semen oozed out over my fingers as his cock continued to bob.

  "Oh, shit," I said.

  Sylus looked horrified. "Fuck. I didn't mean to do that.”

  I stared at my hand coated with his finish, and licked it off my fingers. It was bitter and salty and absolutely fucking delicious, because it was his come.

  I cleaned my face off with a towel. Sylus collapsed onto the couch.

  "Thanks for the lesson," I said, sitting next to him. "I think I learned a lot."

  "Hey, man. You did all the work." He sighed and rubbed his face. I wanted to hold his hand and experience his kiss again, but I resisted—strictly professional. My cock was aching and soaked with precome. I knew my underwear was a mess. I wanted him to touch me, but I was clamming up again. The agreement was that he would show me how to give a blowjob, not get
one myself. I didn't want to make him do anything he didn't want to.

  "You okay?" he asked.

  Please touch me, I thought. For the love of God.

  "Yeah. Why?"

  He shook his head and stood up. He gathered up his clothing and slipped back into his underwear. So, it was over.

  "I'm gonna go shower," he said softly. It was hard for me to tell if he felt awkward about the whole thing.

  "Sure." I did my best to ignore the ache between my legs.

  He paused before heading up the stairs. "If you want more lessons... I'm alright with that. You just let me know."

  I smirked at him. "You just want more blowjobs."

  Sylus laughed his way up the stairs. The awkward tension was gone.

  I sat on the couch, basking in the afterglow of what I'd just done. I realized just how much of myself I'd shut off. I'd thought that performing on stage was what brought me closest to my true self, but now I knew it was nothing compared to what I’d just experienced with Sylus. Writing about attraction and romance was one thing. Actually experiencing it was something else.

  A grin formed on my lips. I couldn't help myself; I was smiling like an idiot. I felt like I'd been given a missing puzzle piece. Like I'd been cured of some deficiency I didn't even know I'd had. I wanted more. I wanted Sylus.

  I could hear the sound of water rushing through the upstairs plumbing as he got into the shower. My cock continued to throb, and I ran my palm across the sensitive bulge. I squeezed it in my hand and then slipped my fingers beneath the band to grasp it in my fist.

  Upstairs, Sylus was naked.

  My heartbeat picked up like a kick drum. I got up from the couch and went up the stairs to Sylus's room. The door was ajar. I could hear the pattering of the shower from inside. I entered, stripping my underwear as I pushed open the bathroom door. I was hit by a burst of hot steam, and I could see Sylus's figure from behind the frosted glass. His eyepatch sat on the counter next to the sink, his underwear on the floor. I opened the shower door and stepped inside.