Mana Dissociation

by Christopher George

  I shrieked out in fury and shock. The fury of my rage shocked me and for a second I almost believed that I could turn back time and undo this injustice. I felt invincible and powerful. The mana rose in my body like a hurricane and it overcame me in seconds.

  I screamed again as the power rose within me. I shuddered as the power overcame me. It felt good. It made me feel strong – untouchable. I felt like a goddess and this church was my place of worship. For a second, everything was alright. With this power, I could right any wrong.

  The delusion only lasted a few seconds, but then reality hit home and the power fizzled within me. It was like bile rising in my throat. This wasn’t me. I didn’t revel in power. I clenched my fists as I fought a battle on two fronts. I couldn’t allow myself to succumb to the euphoria that the power brought me. It was so tempting; It was like a voice whispering promises to me in the dark. It would make everything right. It would make me safe. It would allow me the strength to protect myself from those who would harm me.

  I knew the feeling for what it was. I’d read about it. The phenomena had been studied extensively by our kind. It was kind of like doctors who had reached the top of their field and developed a God complex. The only issue with our kind was that it wasn’t tempered by the same sense of morality that were ingrained in doctors.

  I was staring down at the still figure of Wesley lying on the cathedral floor when Aiden sauntered into sight. As if he were committing the greatest heresy, he nudged the body with his foot to ensure that his foe was gone.

  “Just us now,” Aiden murmured conversationally, “I must admit. I’m impressed. I didn’t think you’d be able to learn to tether your mana like that so quickly.”

  I didn’t want to talk him. I didn’t even want to look at him. Bile rose in my throat and for a second I thought I was going to throw up. The urge passed in seconds.

  “You sick fuck,” I choked, “This is a game to you!”

  He didn’t seem to mind my accusation. In fact, if anything it seemed to broaden the smile in his face further.

  “Of course,” Aiden chuckled, “It’s a game. You finally understand. None of this really matters. You’ll learn soon enough. We don’t have to play by their rules.”

  “You killed Wesley,” I snarled as I steeled myself against the tears that were threatening to overcome me.

  “That doesn’t matter either!” he smiled.

  The statement echoed through the chamber and, in that second, my sickness was gone and in its place was my anger. It flowed from me like before, but this was different. Killing Aiden would be justice. This wasn’t about me. This was about righting wrongs. This was about revenge. This was about Wesley.

  I raised my hand on let the power flow to my palm. I had no idea if I could do this, would I be powerful enough? Could I go through with it? Could I actually kill him? The truth was – I didn’t know.

  I could only stare at the still figure of Wesley on the floor of the cathedral and my resolve grew. I felt the power rise within me and I knew that the sense of invulnerability that it brought was an illusion. I wasn’t facing off against something that I could overpower. Aiden was the same as me – he had the same gifts. I had never met anyone more dangerous than him and I knew outside of my own kind I never would.

  I wasn’t sure when I had begun to think of Mages as my own kind. I suppose it was because it was so ingrained into all the books that I had learned from. We were different. We were stronger. We were smarter. We were simply better. We weren’t human. We were better. It was hard not to become indoctrinated by it all. It was the unwritten point of everything that I had read.

  The power had almost driven me to dizzying heights of pleasure. The more I gained the less I cared about justice, revenge or even Wesley. The power was like the only light in a world of darkness.

  The endorphins swam across my body in waves and my hands began to shake as I sought to contain myself. It was almost sexual in nature, but it was perverse. I knew it for what it was, but I couldn’t help myself. I wanted more. My doubts and self-control were overthrown in seconds and for a moment I became the being of power that I always knew I could be.

  “Aiden!” I called out, my voice wavering, “You should leave. Now.”

  I don’t know if it was the impressive shell of power that I was building around myself or if he heard the sincerity in my words, but he stopped and the smile dropped from his face. His eyes narrowed as he looked at me and a scowl crossed his face.

  “You. Don’t. Give. Me. Orders! Ever!” he hissed, biting off each word, “I don’t take orders from you! Ever!”

  “Leave!” I shrieked as I let the power loose. A telekinetic thread swept from my hand as if an avenging angel had descended from the heavens to do battle against the sinner before me. The marbled floor exploded into mottled shrapnel as my power passed across it. The remaining pews exploded into the kindling surrounding Aiden as I brought my power to bear upon him. It was like trying to direct a hurricane. The power fought me each step of the way as if a will equal to my own simply reveled in the destruction. I watched with glee as Aiden scrambled to get out of the way. His smug expression turned finally into fear as my power smashed the cathedral into shards.

  I was so engrossed in my power that I didn’t see his counter strike until it had landed. I’d like to believe that, had he struck out at me, I would have seen his attack and been able to counter it. Instead, he attacked the scaffolding that I was standing on. I heard the smashing noise as the metal foundations of the scaffold were torn to pieces and felt the whole structure begin to fall in on itself. Gravity would have its own. The ground looked so far down and, now that falling had become a very real possibility, I finally realised the precariousness of my situation.

  If I had been thinking clearly I could have simply tethered my fall using the exact same technique that I had used to climb the damned scaffold in the first place.

  But I wasn’t thinking clearly - instead, I did the only thing I could do and the last thing I should have done. I leapt straight at the stained glass windows. I could see the roof on the other side of the window. It looked strong enough to support my weight.

  I’d expected to burst through the window like they do in the movies, with the shards of glass spreading out in small chunks as I cannonballed through it.

  I was wrong. Stained glass windows don’t break like that. The glass shattered on impact, but not into tiny chunks. It broke into small knife like shards that tore into me. I may as well have just tried to jump through a blender.

  I landed on the rooftop and looked in horror at the blossoming red line that suddenly appeared from my wrist to elbow. At first, it looked like it was only a light cut - then the bleeding began.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  “Get up.” The words pounded through my head, but I couldn’t seem to control my limbs. My eyes were fixated on the quickly growing flow of blood that was now gushing from the large cut on my arm. My head spun and still I couldn’t act. This just didn’t seem real yet. I wasn’t sure if it was shock or something else, but this felt more like fantasy than reality.

  My arm had begun to ache slightly as if something was wrong, but surely I should have been screaming with this much blood pouring from my arm.

  It must have something to do with going into shock. That was a small blessing at least. I could do without pain adding to my problems right now.

  The sound of Aiden telekinetically leaping up onto the catwalk tore my attention back to the present. The sound of a mana thread latching on the window echoed through my subconscious. There is nothing like a threat to cause one to spring into action. Aiden was coming to finish me off. I needed to move. Now.

  I knew that it was important that I should run. He would kill me if he caught me. I knew this for a fact. I needed to move and I needed to move now.

  ‘Run, you stupid bitch. Run,’ I mentally screamed at myself until my body finally got the message.

  My uninjured hand clamped around my fore
arm, but it was pitifully inefficient at stopping the flow of blood. I’d done a first aid course at university and I knew the basics. I needed to stop the flow of blood before I passed out, but I was standing on top of the cathedral roof. Where was I going to get a bandage from up here? The truth was – I wasn’t going to find anything that could help me and I knew it.

  With more force of will than I thought I possessed, I staggered to my feet and lurched forward. My head spun and I almost collapsed at the sudden movement, but somehow I was able to maintain my footing. The dizziness soon passed which was good. Had I fallen, there was a good chance that I would have slid down the uneven roof and fallen to my inevitable death.

  Now that I was moving, my mind began to clear and the hopelessness of the situation began to dawn upon me. Where was I going to go? Where was there to go? I was on a roof. I took stock of my situation and realised that my injuries were worse than I’d realized. I’d also managed to give myself several other cuts as I’d burst through the window and, whilst they weren’t anywhere nearly as bad as the one on my forearm, I was still bleeding quite freely. I briefly wondered how long I’d be able to last like this. I’d have been willing to bet that it wouldn’t be long. Certainly not long enough to get away from Aiden, but I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of catching me. I ran. Let the bastard chase me down.

  My footsteps echoed across the tiled roof and each step I took I thought would be my last. I realized with a degree of hopelessness that I was leaving a trail of blood across the roof that Aiden couldn’t help but follow. Maybe if I got far enough, I could find an access hatch or something that might lead me back to the ground. Hey, a girl could hope.

  Unfortunately, I wasn’t so lucky, and I’d been casting dice in bad faith since this whole thing had begun. It was only a matter of time before I fell. I was running on an uneven roof, suffering from shock and blood loss. It was inevitable really.

  With a strangled yelp, my foot slipped on a loose tile and I went down. It seemed to happen in slow motion. My hip hit the tiles first and, for a second, I thought I could simply regain my footing. Unfortunately, gravity is one mistress you can’t deny. I began to slide down the rooftop.

  I scrambled desperately to try to slow my path, but my hands were slick with blood and my momentum wasn’t slowed much. The edge of the roof became my only horizon as I knew that a fall from the fifteen metre roof would definitely kill me. This was it. This was how I go out. I don’t remember feeling fear, and I didn’t particularly feel that sad. It was more a pragmatic calm had come over me. This was a fact. There was nothing I could do to change the irrefutable fact that if I went off the side of the building, I was going to die. The edge was approaching fast and I was almost looking forward to it. In a few seconds, this would all be over. Just a few seconds and then I would finally be free of all this. Just a few seconds more. I could do a few seconds. That was easy. All I had to do was wait.

  * * * * * *

  I was almost angry when the few seconds seemed to last forever. It’s strange what goes through your mind in moments of stress and danger. It’s almost like the higher mind shuts down and you’re left with base instinct. It can act without you even being aware of it. It took a few more seconds before I opened my eyes and saw myself balancing precariously on the very edge of the roof. If I leaned forward, I’d go over, but I wasn’t in any danger. I could see blood dripping freely down the side of the building from my cut arm. My other arm was stretched outwards with a telekinetic thread latched on the roof. It took me several more seconds to realise what had happened. I certainly hadn’t called upon the magic to save me. It had all happened so fast that I hadn’t even thought to use it.

  My arm was throbbing as the blood left my body. I couldn’t stay like this for much longer, or my last minute save would be for nothing. Using more mana than muscle, I pulled myself more squarely back onto the rooftop. I wasn’t a second too late either as the strain finally got the better of me and my mana thread failed. Fortunately, by that stage I was firmly on the roof. I clamped my hand back over my injured wrist and gave out a strangled gasp for air. The pain on my arm was starting to get worse. Great.

  Unfortunately, that wasn’t the worst of my problems. The worst of my problems was standing about ten metres away from me looking at me with a calculating expression on his face.

  “You’re mine!” Aiden hissed.

  Fuck.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  I didn’t know how I was going to get out of this. I wasn’t sure that I was. Looking at Aiden’s face, I had no idea what he even wanted. Did he want to kill me or was it something worse? It was hard to tell for sure. He had a curious expression on his face. I curled up into a ball with my arm cradled protectively against my chest as I attempted to rise to my feet.

  “Oh shit,” He breathed as his features softened, “I didn’t mean to hurt you. Let me help you!”

  He rushed forward with his hands outstretched, but recoiled when he saw me flinch and attempt to rise. He didn’t know that I couldn’t have run away from him. Hell, it was fifty/fifty that I’d even be able to stand.

  My head was going light and spinning from what I presumed was blood loss and the throbbing from my forearm was almost unbearable.

  My revulsion hit him like a hammer and he seemed to almost stagger as if I had struck him. His eyes narrowed and his face fell into a familiar sneer. I watched as his eyes widened as the magic took him. There was very little I could do about it. I think I had used the last of my reserves to stop myself from sliding off the roof. It kind of seemed a waste now, death by hitting the sidewalk sounded infinitely better than whatever Aiden had in store for me. I could see the mana pulsating across his arm as he poured his power into his clenched fist.

  I closed my eyes. Perhaps it would be best if I didn’t see it coming. Perhaps it would be over quickly.

  I kept my eyes clenched firmly until they hurt. Unwilling to look up at my killer. I expected any second to hear the telltale crackle of a mana thread being formed and slamming down on me. It must have only been seconds, but it felt like hours, that I waited for a strike that would never come.

  “Leave her alone!” a voice snapped out. The command echoed across the rooftop. It was a woman’s voice. It took me a few seconds to realize that I recognised that voice. The voice belonged to May.

  My heart rose in hope and I opened my eyes. Aiden had turned to face the newcomer who was walking calmly across the tiled rooftop towards us. I’d never seen anything like it. The power that radiated from her shone like a star in the night. A shield more powerful than anything I could imagine was surrounding her and her hands glowed with mana. She walked slowly, deliberately placing each foot in front of the other with the calm assurance that everything was under her control. Her gaze passed across us as if she were a goddess looking at a sacrifice. My previous thoughts of divinity were swept away as I saw true power.

  Aiden took a startled step back and then ready himself. I watched with incredulity as he formed a flimsy shield around himself and flicked his hand forming a mana thread. The idiot was going to fight her.

  Time seemed to slow down as I saw a slight smile etch itself onto May’s face. It was nothing more than a slight twist of her lips but it was clear. Aiden was no threat. May didn’t even alter the pace of her steps as Aiden’s thread lanced out at her. She didn’t even bother to dodge, she let the thread smack harmlessly across the side of her shield. Aiden readied himself to strike again, but May simply raised her left hand and a thread lanced out with unbelievable speed and smashed Aiden’s shield into pieces. It was a calculated strike, just enough power to smash the shield, but leave Aiden standing untouched.

  Aiden staggered back several more steps as his defenses were laid bare and let out a primal scream of fury. The scream seemed to be more animal than man. In fury, Aiden attempted to rally himself and raise another shield. May continued walking towards us, but I could see from her expression she wouldn’t allow Aiden another strike
. I expected another thread, but May hit him with something I’d never seen. It took only a few seconds for her to summon two small spheres of mana before her. With a small gesture, she directed them at the enemy before her. One struck Aiden in the shoulder and the other in the side. I had no idea what to expect. I’d half expected them to explode, but they didn’t. Instead, it was almost like they were absorbed into him. It didn’t look that bad, until Aiden started shaking. The mana on his flesh was going crazy. It almost looked like he was having a fit as the mana went haywire. He fell to his knees and eventually doubled over falling face first onto the tiled roof.

  May completed her journey across the rooftops coming to a halt over Aiden’s still twitching body.

  “Are you okay?” she asked softly.

  At first, I thought she was talking to Aiden and didn’t respond, but soon realized.

  “Yeah,” I gasped with a slight smile, “I’ve had worse.” I wasn’t sure why I had lied. It was very obvious to anyone with eyes that I wasn’t alright. May didn’t comment, but I could see that she knew just what condition I was in.

  “We shall arrange for medical attention for you.” She murmured casually, almost as if this were an afterthought. Her attention was squarely focused on the now still unconscious figure of Aiden at her feet.

  It took several tries, but I managed to finally get the strength to pull myself to my feet. My head swam once again and for a second I thought I might fall, but eventually it passed.

  May didn’t offer a hand to assist, instead she stared at me as if waiting for me to say something. I had no idea what she was she expected me to say.

  “Is he dead?” I gestured towards Aiden.

  “No,” May replied simply, “We don’t kill our own. He’ll wake – thought I doubt he’ll feel glad about it.”

  “What will happen to him?”