The Unlikeable Demon Hunter Collection: Books 1-6: A Complete Paranormal Romantic Comedy Series

by Deborah Wilde

  He slid a finger inside me and I moaned, that delicious familiar tension swelling and coursing through me. I tugged him up.

  “What?” he said, lust glazing his eyes. “I was eating you out like a champ.”

  I laughed and couldn’t help kissing him again, quick and hard. “Fuck me, Snowflake.” He reached for the drawer of his nightstand but I stopped him. “Ro. Can we…?” I licked my lips nervously. “I’m on the pill and I’m clean.”

  “I’m clean, too.” We’d both been tested by Dr. Sousa, the Rasha-approved doctor who’d dug a bullet out of my shoulder a while ago. Ro sat back on his calves, his hands resting on my legs. “Are you sure?”

  “I’ve never gone bare with anyone. Not even Cole.” I needed him to understand everything I was trusting him with. I swallowed thickly. “I don’t want anything between us.”

  Rohan brushed a strand of hair out of my face. “I don’t either.”

  He pressed me into the mattress, still sitting back on his calves. I cupped the nape of his neck, drawing him down to my mouth, bracketing his face in my hands. Our tongues tangled; the tip of Rohan’s cock pressed against me.

  Rohan remained between my legs, not yet entering me. Our bodies molded together, hands caressing, mouths insistent. We pulled back, our gazes caught.

  I caressed his cheek, his stubble tickling the pads of my fingers. “Hi, you.”

  Rohan gave me a wide-open smile, equal parts tenderness and soft vulnerability. “Hi, yourself.” Oh lordy. Heat rolled under my skin and my heart danced a furious tarantella. “Whatcha up to, sweetheart?”

  I skimmed my hands down his side and shrugged. “Hanging out.” I sucked the hollow of his neck and he hissed a groan. I wrapped my legs around his waist. “You?”

  “Making my girlfriend orgasm her brains out. Think it’s a plan?”

  I nodded. “A very sound one. So long as you enjoy yourself as well.”

  He rubbed his nose against mine. “Thank you. I shall.”

  I waved a hand. “Proceed, good man.”

  Rohan glided his hand up my calf. “I’ve never gone bare with anyone before.”

  My chest swelled with happiness at being his first this way and I couldn’t keep the smile from my face.

  Rohan brushed the sweetest kiss on my lips and plunged inside me.

  I arched into his touch with a sigh, my eyes drifting to his. “I didn’t know it could feel like this.”

  “Me neither.” Ro’s eyes gleamed in the darkness, a million shades of gold from the purity of flickering flame to the darker edge of the final intense burst of sunset.

  A bead of sweat trickled down my chest to my stomach, his body pressing mine into the mattress. We were wrapped in the tangle of our heat, his heart racing, pulsing against my rib cage. I tightened my legs around him, wanting to keep us here forever, savoring this new experience of being so intimately joined.

  “Can I move now?” he asked.

  “Oh my God, yes, already.” I thrust against him.

  I gripped his clenched biceps as he propped himself up over me, thrusting with a slow roll of his hips. His heart tattoo on his left bicep peeked out between my splayed fingers.

  Rolling us over so that I was riding him, he gripped my hips, his thrusts harder, rawer. He fumbled in the drawer by the bed for the lube. A squirt later, he slid his finger into my ass.

  He rewarded my wanton moan with another finger. I’d never felt so full, so complete.

  “You good?” he asked.

  “Y-yeah.” I raked my nails down his chest, shivering every time I bottomed out. Having him inside me like this, took our lovemaking to a whole new realm. We were physically and emotionally as intertwined as two people could be. I couldn’t have handled this before now, and especially not with anyone else. But with Ro?

  I clasped his face in my hands and kissed him.

  “You’re my supernova.” Rohan curled up, dragging his lips over my belly, his scruff scratchy, and swirled his tongue into my navel.

  I giggled and pushed him back, leaning over to capture his lips again, my hair drifting down along the hard planes of his abs. “What about you? You want anything else?” My voice was breathy. I was drowning in the twin tempos of his fingers and cock.

  Rohan traced my swollen lips with his tongue. “Just you.”

  My orgasm raged through me, my back arching. A supernova swallowed me up and for a moment all I could do was let myself be consumed.

  Rohan’s expression was fierce. He drove into me, his entire body bucking, adding to my blissful aftershocks. With a hoarse cry, he came.

  I flopped onto the mattress and he rested his head on my chest. I stroked his hair. “That was… almost too much and not nearly enough.”

  “I know.” He pressed a gentle kiss to my hip. “I’ll get a towel,” he said, and slipped from the bed. The water in his bathroom ran for a moment and then Rohan cleaned us both up with a cool, damp cloth. He’d even brought a dry facecloth to cover the wet spot.

  The covers rustled as he got back under, gathering me close against him. When he high-fived me with a dead-ass solemn expression, I laughed until my stomach was sore.

  I fell asleep in a spill of moonlight and a warm arm around my shoulders. And despite my best efforts, the last thing flickering through my mind was Rohan’s raspy voice playing over and over again:

  Just you.

  Chapter 7

  The morning light was a soft filter, my body boneless and half-dozy. Our limbs were entangled with my head on Rohan’s chest and his stubble itchy against my forehead as we listened to rain pattering against the windows.

  I traced lazy circles on his abs and he hummed, content, in a voice thick with sleep. I craned my neck to see the tiny strip of gold beneath his half-closed lids. “Last night was amazing.”

  “Yeah.” Rohan tensed for the briefest second. My expression hardened. “Cool down. It’s not morning after freak out. It’s fine.” He scratched his jaw. “I’d just better… shave.”

  He was staring at my chin which, come to think of it, stung. I darted out of bed to his mirror and let out a wail. “What have you done to me?” The skin along my jaw was rubbed raw, like I’d spent the night cuddled up with a sandpaper pillow.

  Rohan sat up, the sheet pooling at his hips. “This is not all on me.”

  I touched my chafed red skin. Whimpered.

  He grinned at me. “Want me to kiss it better?”

  I opened his bathroom door. “No. I want you to never kiss me ag–”

  The door slammed shut, Rohan bracing his hand against it. “Say you don’t mean that.”

  “Obviously,” I grumbled.

  He kissed the tip of my nose. “I’ll shave.” He bent down to retrieve the turquoise shirt he’d worn last night, but I snatched it away from him and put it on. If our relationship had escalated to physical wounds, then I got to wear his clothing.

  I inhaled, letting his scent seep into mine. The fabric was soft and contoured nicely to my body, hitting mid-thigh. “Keeping this,” I said.

  He gave a resigned nod and stepped past me into the bathroom. Only when I heard the shower go on, did I remember what day it was.

  I pounded on the bathroom door to get my “Happy Birthday,” but Rohan was singing under the spray and didn’t hear me, even when I jiggled the knob two or seven times. I searched the bed, but there was no gift hidden under my pillow. Hanging off the mattress to check underneath only gave me a crick in my neck, raiding his drawers yielded nothing more interesting than the fact he folded his underwear, which was old news, and rifling through his closet was a bust unless you counted the lint-covered roll of butterscotch candy the sneak had hidden in his leather jacket. It was like expecting a trip exploring the coral reefs and instead getting the toilet he’d flushed his goldfish down when he was nine.

  I still took the candy with me, unclenching my chokehold on the closet doorknob. This was the boyfriend who had taken Lily to Paris for dessert. He’d sure as shit remembered he
r birthday. Between the two apps and the back up paper reminder, he knew what today was. Was forgetting an honest mistake having just woken up, or a sign that I was once more with someone who was going to throw me under the bus emotionally and walk away?

  As I gathered up last night’s clothes, my phone tumbled out of my pocket onto the floor. There was a notification with my new word of the day.

  Insouciance. Noun. An uncaring attitude, lack of interest.

  I stuffed it into the middle of my clothing bundle. Rohan had probably gotten up early, and made me a fancy breakfast where he would gift me with the most amazing present ever, after he crawled back under the covers and pretended to wake up next to me.

  Could happen.

  I yanked the bedroom door open, ran down the hallway to the kitchen sniffing like a coke addict, and skidded to a stop at the sight of Drio dressed in raggedly cut-off sweats and a T-shirt, his feet bare, chugging back a glass of water at the kitchen sink. The sweat from his workout had caused his blond hair to plaster to his forehead, but it also made his olive skin glisten so it wasn’t all gross. “When did you get back?”

  Grimacing, he jerked a finger at my face. “What’s happened to make you look like that?”

  “I look fine.”

  Snorting his disagreement, he dumped the glass in the sink, his green gaze flicking over Rohan’s shirt that I wore. “He’s awake?” he asked in his sexy Italian accent, his face lighting up.

  “Yeah, fanboy. He’s in the shower. Hurry and you might get to soap him up.”

  Drio gave me the hand-to-arm Italian gesture of “fuck off.”

  “Happy birthday, younger and uglier twin.” Ari strode into the room and jerked back at the sight of my chin. “Jesus. You’re not supposed to really be uglier.”

  “All right, already.” I hugged Ari back, even though he didn’t deserve it. “Happy birthday, older and stinkier twin.”

  Ari held up a badly-wrapped, lumpy gift. “Took you long enough to wake up.” I jumped for it but he held it out of range. “Where’s mine?”

  I gave another pointless swipe. “Upstairs.”

  “That better not be your new look for your new age,” Kane said, entering. He poked my chin.

  “You can all bite me.” It was too much to hope that my fellow Rasha would be adult about my stubble-burn and not mention it. Ari gave me an exaggerated shudder of disgust and actually walked out.

  He was so not getting his present.

  Kane helped himself to coffee, scratching his bare belly. “Were you kissing a lizard?”

  “If you’re gonna insult me, at least caffeinate me first.” I reached for his coffee but he held it out of reach.

  “I only speak truth,” Kane said.

  “It’s disgusting,” Drio said.

  I flicked his arm.

  “What? This is a truth circle. You look like you went a round with a windigo. And lost.” Drio waved a hand at me. “Fix yourself.”

  “It’s not–he’s shaving–” I threw my hands up in the air. “I don’t need to explain myself to you, you big jerk.”

  Drio grinned at me.

  “Love’s not supposed to hurt, but when it does?” Ari sauntered back in and placed a tube in my hand. “Polysporin.”

  “Ha ha. Are we done taunting the vulnerable female now? Can we return to business as usual?”

  “That is business as usual,” Drio said.

  “Walked into that one, babyslay.”

  “Go back to Rome,” I said to Drio. I opened the oven. No waffles lovingly prepared by my boyfriend. I cracked my knuckles, nostrils flaring.

  Ari waved my gift at me. “Upstairs. Move it.”

  There was a bit of a doorway tussle with free-ranging elbow jabs, but I got inside my room first and did a brief gloating wriggle dance. I grabbed his gift off the dresser and on the count of three, we switched presents.

  I tore mine open. Inside was a multi-colored candy necklace, a huge pink candy diamond in a purple plastic setting, and a black sleeveless shirt covered in sparkles. Smack in the center of the shirt was a horned demon head made of silver crystals. It sat in a pink crystal circle with a slash through it. Ari had been responsible for many of my best T-shirts over the years but he’d outdone himself with this one.

  I hugged my “No Demons” shirt to my chest. “You’re the best.”

  “Not so bad yourself.” Ari read the back of the jewel case for Inside, one of those moody puzzle videogames he liked so much.

  As I adorned myself with my candy jewelry, Kane stepped in, holding a plastic bag.

  “Still not a good look,” he said.

  “Says the man with the worst fashion sense in the history of mankind.” I poked his leopard-print shirt. “What are you, a middle-aged divorceé? This, on the other hand?” I modeled my candy gems. “They’re beeauutiful traditional gift items.”

  I bit off a red candy bead.

  Ari swallowed the Coffee Crisp chocolate bar he had stuffed in his mouth. Wafer layers stacked with a coffee mousse and covered in milk chocolate, this exotic Canadian delicacy was the first of the six full-sized bars that comprised the other part of his gift. “Did you need something?” he asked Kane in a frosty tone.

  Oy vey.

  I muscled in between them. “You can’t throw away a lifelong friendship.” Yes, Ari had kissed Kane after being turned on by–and yeah, attracted to–Malik, this hot marid demon. And yes, Kane felt used and angry, and it probably wasn’t the best circumstances for Ari to initiate a first kiss with the dude. But come on.

  “I’m pulling birthday rank and demanding that you two work your shit out already.”

  “It’s my birthday, too. And I’m older, so…” Ari crossed his arms.

  “Your insouciance doesn’t fly.”

  “I already got you a non-refundable gift,” Kane said to me. “You can’t have both.”

  “I don’t need material goods. I want you to make up.”

  He pulled a slim cream envelope from the bag and held it up. The word “Miraj” was written on the outside in distinctive red script.

  “You got me a gift certificate to the hammam?” This Turkish spa was deluxe. I’d heard about it from my mom but had never been able to afford it myself. I grabbed the envelope, and hugged him.

  “Yeah, yeah.” Kane pushed me off him.

  I tried to peer inside the gift bag that Kane held. “Is that Ari’s gift, perchance?”

  “As if,” Ari said.

  Kane glowered at him, thrusting the bag stiffly out.

  Ari took it like it might explode in his hands and pulled out a hardcover manga with a slick red and black design. “This is the limited edition.”

  “So?” Kane’s chin tipped up a couple of notches higher.

  “It’s not even available in North America.” Ari opened it like he was holding a priceless artifact. My brother had developed a love of manga around his tenth birthday–inexplicable at the time, since none of his other friends were into it–that had remained strong and ongoing. Not so inexplicable now. “There’s a backlog on it everywhere.”

  Kane rubbed the back of his neck. “I got my cousin in Tokyo to get it. It’s not a big deal.”

  Ari leafed through the book with an undecipherable expression.

  “Ari,” I hissed. “Thank him.”

  He and Kane stared at each other for a very long, tense, mutual idiot boy moment. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” Kane pivoted and left the room.

  Ari put the book back in the shopping bag and unwrapped the second Coffee Crisp. “What did Ro get you?”

  “That was pathetic. Get lost. I have to get dressed.”

  He paused, the chocolate bar halfway to his mouth, darting a glance after Kane. “When do you wanna leave later?”

  “Five?”

  He threw me a thumbs up, busy devouring bar two, and left, shutting the door behind him.

  I ate three more candy beads.

  The phone rang with Leo’s special Flight
of the Conchords ringtone. “I’m twenty-one!” I said in greeting.

  Leo sang me Happy Birthday.

  “Are you coming to the parents’ house tonight?” I unbuttoned Rohan’s shirt and tossed it on the bed.

  “Of course.”

  “Will I be getting a present?” I rooted around in my underwear drawer for a bra.

  “Perhaps.”

  “Did you know Drio was back?”

  “He didn’t go straight from the airport to Demon Club, that’s for sure. That boy took everything out of me and then some.”

  I ate another couple of candy beads. “You greedy monkey.”

  “I heard zero complaints. He even gave me this gorgeous hand-printed scarf he’d bought in Rome.”

  He’s buying her gifts? Holy shit! “Next time get cash,” I said, trying to hang on to my phone as I shimmied into my bra. “Though I guess the scarf looks more impressive than a lonely five bucks.”

  “Ha. Ha.”

  “The no kiss thing wasn’t a problem?” I threw on my new shirt from Ace and tugged up a pair of black booty shorts.

  “Not yet. I’ll break him.” She snickered. “I plan to have my hands full with repeat performances from the Italian Stallion. Keep milking him dry.”

  I twisted my hair into a bun. “Ew. You know how easily I’m traumatized by visuals. I’m a delicate flower.”

  She snorted. “What did rock star get you?”

  I squirmed and even though she couldn’t see it my freaky friend sensed it.

  “He didn’t start your day with a gift?” she demanded. “And he lives?”

  “His living is conditional to what happens when I next see him.” I sank down on the bed. “We went bareback last night. First time. Ever.”

  Her shocked gasp was actually kind of gratifying. Her “you love him,” not so much.

  “No undying pledges involved.”

  “That was insensitive of me. Okaygottarunschmugs.” She hung up.

  I stared suspiciously at my phone. Ten seconds later a phone rang in the hallway. I was out the door and ripping it out of Drio’s hands before he’d finished his greeting of “Pronto.”