Ayden
Page 10
I may be a shitty dater, but usually I’m at least able to have some fun. Today though, no matter how hard I’ve tried, this date hasn’t worked.
“Trey, I’m sorry.” I pull away. “I think I need to call it a day. I’m just super tired.”
But after I say goodbye to Trey, I don’t go home. I can’t possibly go home and sleep after that…that event with Ayden.
I walk purposefully across the town square, relieved I don’t run into Ayden and Jenny.
When I reach the pool hall, I slip inside. Instead of going toward the back room where I work, I turn left and keep walking toward the sounds of a piano playing, not stopping until I can peek inside the half-open door of the music lounge.
Guy’s alone. The crowds haven’t made their way here this early yet. I lean too far forward and bang my foot against the door jam, causing him to look up at the noise.
“Hey.” He waves me inside.
“You sound awesome,” I tell him as I walk up to the piano.
“Thanks, Bella. I’m making a brand-new demo.”
I shudder involuntarily.
He notices. “Kind of sucks.”
“Yeah.” I smile at him. “But I’m so proud of you.”
“You’re a fighter too you know,” he says as he reaches for his water.
I look at the music sheets he has spread out in front of him now. Beatles, Beatles, and more Beatles. “Wait a minute. Where are your songs?”
“At home,” he says. “Thought I’d relax for the night and play something that’s already made it big.”
I take a seat on the stool by the piano.
“You sing; I’ll play?” Guy says as he starts tapping out a melody. “Like old times.”
I hesitate and glance back at the open door. “I’m not sure I’m ready for anyone else to listen.”
“So lock the door.”
I shoot Guy a grateful look and walk over to the door. By the time I’ve turned the lock and returned to the stool, he’s already started the chords.
I stumble my way through the first verse, but by the chorus, I’m feeling the music. I relax as I sing, and when we finish, I exhale in relief, feeling like I’ve broken through some sort of barrier.
“You still got it, you know.” He raises his eyebrows.
“Yeah, right.” I start fiddling with my hair.
He pulls a card out of his pocket and hands it to me. It’s a business card.
“Sea Urchin Club & Lounge.” I look up. “So?”
“It’s a new place in Portland. Just opened last weekend. They’re looking for acts. They have slots for performers,” he says to my blank look.
“I don’t perform club music.”
“It’s a club and lounge, and they need early evening slots. Your style’s fine for that. You’re like acoustic rock. I know the manager. Ask for Dan, and tell him you know me.”
“I’m done with performing,” I say.
“Oh, yeah? That’s not what it sounds like. You still sound great, Bella. Seriously.”
“I don’t think I’m ready for a real gig.”
“I know you don’t. That’s why I’m saying it.”
I look at the card in my hand. Sea Urchin Club & Lounge. Dan Dwynn, Manager. My heart comes up into my throat at the very thought of getting back out there again. But I thank Guy and take the card.
And then I head home.
The second I’m alone in my bed, memories of tonight with Ayden come flooding back. The way his hot gaze fixed on me—I’ve never had someone focus on me like that.
I sigh. And right now, he’s with Jenny. Doing God knows what. I don’t want to admit how much that burns. But it does.
I force myself to ignore the ache in my chest, along with thoughts of Ayden and Jenny having hot, sweaty sex, and I turn over and fall into a fitful sleep.
Ayden
I swallow down the rest of my beer, wanting nothing more than to get out of here. Once we left the festival, Jenny insisted on going out to eat at some formal sit-down place when I thought all we were doing was grabbing a drink. I’m not dressed for the place, but Jenny doesn’t seem to mind. All she wants to do is put her hands on me.
On my face, on my chest, and especially on my hat, which she keeps trying to remove with alarming insistence.
Then she moves on to more interesting areas. Her hand slides down my torso and onto the top of my jeans where she keeps going until she’s cupping my crotch.
In the middle of the restaurant. If I wanted her, I would throw down some bills and rush home with her to my bed. That had been my plan.
But…
It’s like my dick went to sleep when Bella left the festival.
And it feels…wrong to hook up with Jenny.
So I take her hands off me and ask for the check.
Telling her I’ve got a sudden headache from the jetlag and lack of sleep, I drop her off at her place.
“You sure you don’t want to come inside?” Jenny asks me at her front step. “I promise I’ll make it worth your while.”
Her hand slides to my dick again.
After what happened between Bella and me today, I’m desperate for a release. And I’d like nothing more than to lose myself in someone else. I need to lose myself in someone else so I don’t screw everything up and slam my mouth over Bella’s the next time I see her.
But I can’t bring myself to even kiss Jenny good night.
I remove her hand and kiss the back of it quickly. “I’m sure. Thanks for today. Sleep well.”
I can feel her glare on my back as I walk away and get into my car. And I kick myself because I had a sure thing, a way to protect my friendship with Bella, and I just walked away.
When I reach my house, instead of pulling into my driveway, I keep driving until I reach Bella’s street. And then, before I can stop myself, I go by her house. The lights are out and her car’s in the driveway, but that doesn’t give me the relief I’m hoping for. She walked to the festival, which means she and Trey could still be out, or together at his house. Or maybe they’re at her house and already in bed. I clench the steering wheel with both hands at the very thought.
I have to see her.
But I can’t stop by now; if she’s with Trey, I’ll want to kill him.
And if she’s home alone?
I’m so tightly wound right now; I won’t be able to stop myself from touching her.
I force myself to pull away from her driveway, and I drive home.
I’m desperate to know if she spent the night with Trey. But it will have to wait until tomorrow.
And there’s only one way to find out for sure.
Put my job skills to good use.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Bella
Whirrrrr!
Without even opening my eyes, I groan at the sound that won’t stop.
I put the pillow over my head and try to go back to sleep.
Whirrrr!
The annoyingly grating mechanical sound is growing closer. It sounds like it’s right outside my bedroom window.
I open one eye and glance at the clock on my bedside table. Not even seven freaking a.m. What is that damn noise?
Wait a minute.
That sounds like a lawnmower.
But I don’t use a landscaping service.
I get out of bed and throw open the window shade.
And suddenly, I’m staring at Ayden’s bare, muscled back and his perfectly sexy jeans-clad ass.
Crap.
I really should have used my vibrator more than once last night.
I’m still far too turned on to be meeting Ayden face-to-face. And the hardest part is that I’m turned on for him. No one else. Just Ayden Wild.
He makes a turn and heads toward the house. I try to duck but it’s too late.
He lifts his head, and his piercing blue gaze hits me straight on. I shift my eyes downward, but all I see is a six-pack of sweaty abs staring back at me.
I jerk my head back up, and my eyes
hook into Ayden’s again.
Everything that happened last night passes between us.
Ayden’s cheeks flush as he raises his hand in a wave. A cocky wave if I’m not mistaken. He knows. He knows how much he turned me on last night inside the music tent.
And I know it too.
Oh, this shouldn’t be weird and awkward at all.
Sure it won’t.
I pull the blind back down on the window and open my dresser drawers. I grab a pair of pink and white striped shorts and an off-the-shoulder slouchy blue sweatshirt that says Lucky Bay across the back. I dress quickly, throw my hair back into a messy ponytail, and step outside in my bare feet.
Ayden shuts the mower off and slowly heads toward me. I make it down my front steps and partway across the lawn before we meet.
“Hey, B.” He reaches out and tugs at my ponytail. “Did I wake you?”
I put my hand on my hip. “What do you think?”
He puts his hands into his back pockets as a slow grin takes over his face.
“And something tells me you wanted to wake me up early this morning.” I cock my hip. “You want to tell me why?”
He opens his mouth, but I cut him off.
“See, I’m pretty sure I know the answer to my own question.”
He’s still smiling. “Oh, really?”
“Yes. You wanted to make sure I didn’t spend the night with Trey. And so you figured if you came over early enough, you could catch me with him. Or not, as the case may be.”
Ayden glances toward my bedroom window, and I exhale. “He’s not here, Ayden. And I wasn’t there either. I spent the night in my house—alone.”
He blows out a breath and takes off his hat. Tossing it onto the ground, he digs his teeth into his bottom lip and stares at me.
Don’t ask him. Don’t ask him.
“I took Jenny home last night,” he finally says.
My heart sinks.
Ayden’s studying my reaction. “I kissed the back of her hand at the door, and I told her good night.”
Hope soars within me, and the knots in my stomach—the ones I felt all night when I envisioned Ayden and Jenny together—disappear.
Ayden’s eyes flash. “Bella.”
I weigh what to say next. “You were staring at me, Ayden,” I murmur.
“I know.” His words come out thick. “Don’t you think I fucking know that? And I’m sorry I made things uncomfortable. I never meant to do that.”
Emotions I never allow myself to feel come up into my mouth, and I can’t hold them back. “We don’t usually act so…possessive or jealous. Why now?”
He reaches for his hat and shoves it back on his head. “I’m honestly not sure.”
I peek underneath his Sox cap to see his expression, but he pulls it lower over his face. I resist the urge to grab the damn hat off his head and fling it down the street.
I tap my toe on the grass. “Look, I’ll always be on your side. Just like I always have been.”
I can see his throat working as he swallows hard. “Why do I feel like you have more to say?”
“I’m not sure how to say what I’m feeling without blowing up our friendship. And nothing’s worth that to me. Not even…”
Not even mind-altering sex with you.
Oh, God. Why won’t my hormones stop shouting at me? Ayden and I work as best friends. We wouldn’t work as lovers. We’re both terrible in relationships, and if we ever crossed that line with each other, no doubt we’d screw it up and destroy our friendship forever.
“Bella.” Ayden’s tone is solemn. “Last night was…it could have been…”
“A terrible mistake.” I make myself say the three words one of us has to say before this boat leaves the dock and heads for the open seas. I lock my knees together, willing the need between my legs to stop calling to me. My nipples are coming to attention too, and I hurriedly cross my arms over my chest. Just because I want to climb Ayden right now and rip his jeans off of him is no excuse. We’re friends. That’s it.
Ayden’s lip curves up as he watches my movements. “A mistake,” he repeats. “You really believe that, Ms. Wesley? Can I put you on the stand and have you take an oath?”
I kick his foot lightly. “Shut up.”
He’s full out grinning now. “Because I’m sensing some major conflict going on between your body and your brain. Am I right?”
“Ayden Wild, stop messing around about this. This is us.”
He’s still grinning, but the pain swimming in his eyes tells me he knows exactly what I’m getting at. “No one knows that better than I do, B.” He pauses. “Do you remember why we made our pact when we were thirteen years old?”
I startle at his question. “Um…of course I do.”
Is he going to…
“Because I kissed you.”
Okay, so he is going to go there.
“I kissed you, and do you remember why?”
My voice comes out strangled when I answer him. “You said you wanted to make sure that your first real kiss was with me. And that mine was with you.”
“That’s right.” Ayden smiles, and his ocean blue eyes shine as brightly as the sun over our heads. “To this day, it’s still the best damn kiss of my life, Bella.”
Shit, shit, shit. I squeeze my thighs together, trying desperately to shut down the sensations hitting me between my legs. Maybe if we just have sex once…we could get it out of our systems, and then I’d no longer crave him like I am. Because I am craving Ayden Wild, and it’s torturous.
“But I get it,” Ayden continues. “I understand why we met up the next day and made the pact. It was a way for us to make sure what happened between us never happened again. I get why we did that.”
My next words float out into the air on a breathy half-moan. “You do?”
“I do.” His mouth shifts to a frown. “Because we never would have made it through high school intact. Somewhere along the way, I would have hurt you. I would have rather died than do that, but I know myself, Bella. Look at my dad and what he did to my mom.”
I jerk to awareness. “What are you talking about, Ayden? Your father drowned. He didn’t hurt your mom—or any of you—on purpose.” I put my hand on his bare arm and shake him gently.
Ayden’s eyes go blank. “My dad may not have meant to break my mom’s heart, but he did. My grandfather—same thing. He may not have planned on skipping town the day he found out his company had gone bankrupt, but he did, and my grandmother was left all alone with six boys. Luckily, most of them were already men, but she had to grow old alone.”
I keep my hand on his arm and step closer to him. We’re inches apart, our eyes locked on one another. “Ayden, listen to me. You’re not cursed. Your paternal line is not a curse. Okay? That’s not why I agreed on the pact. I agreed because—”
“Because you’d lost faith too,” he says, his mouth moving closer to mine until I can feel his breath on my lips when he talks. “When your dad cheated on your mom and she caught him, you lost them both. And you didn’t ever want to feel that kind of pain again.”
I can’t breathe because his lips are now so close. I nearly lean forward and press my mouth against his.
“Breathe, Bella.” Ayden steps back so that he’s now a foot or so away from me.
I take in a deep gulp of air and let it out.
His dimple deepens. “Feeling better?”
I’m too turned on to laugh it off. “Yeah.”
He takes my hand in his. “We were right. We’re still right. As much as I hate seeing you with other guys, we’re best friends, and we need it to stay that way.”
I cough out an answer. “Exactly.”
His eyes darken until they’re nearly liquid. “Let me ask you one thing, though.”
“Okay.”
I’m surprised at the vulnerability in his face when he says, “Do you regret me staring at you like that last night?”
No. Not for one damn second.
And I can�
��t possibly lie to him about it either.
I shake my head.
His expression relaxes. “Me neither. And about last night…” He steps so close to me I can see the green in his eyes. “That was the hottest two minutes of my life.”
I gasp. “But we didn’t…”
“I know. We didn’t even fucking touch.” His breath ghosts my cheek as he leans closer. “That being said, we can’t afford to fuck up what we have.”
I nod, unable to tear my gaze off of him. “Right.”
He lets out a heavy breath. “So we’ll still keep going with our dares this summer. But I think we can agree that double dating is off the table.”
“Absolutely. And in the short term, we should probably really focus on finding…you know…” I trail off.
“Finding what?”
“Physical companionship,” I say stiffly.
“You mean fuck other people?” Ayden says in a neutral tone.
My face goes nuclear. “Sure. That.” Even though the thought of you touching another woman is crushing. “Maybe then things will go back to normal between us.”
He nods, his expression completely shuttered. “Okay. Will do.”
Super.
“I should go…” he says, gesturing toward his car.
“I need to get going,” I say at the same time.
Three beats pass as we stare at each other in silence.
“Bella, I truly do wish the best for you on your search for your forever guy.” Ayden’s voice cracks as he says it, and his gaze on me is so hot I feel like I’m burning up.
“I wish the same for you. And whether my plus one ends up being a tool from the bar, or yours is the town whore, I’m sure everything will work out the way it’s supposed to.”
Ayden huffs out a short laugh. “Christ, Bella.”
“As long as we’re clear.”
“Crystal.”
We stand awkwardly, with me wondering if it’s even possible to gracefully exit this conversation, when Ayden catches my wrist and runs his thumb over the soft inner skin. His blue eyes lock onto mine when he murmurs, “I have to tell you, Bella—I hate seeing you date. I’ve always hated it.”
My mouth drops open. “You have?”