“Well, this is a surprise, a pleasant one nonetheless,” she said when one of her servants ushered him into her morning parlour. As soon as Allan had married Sammy, his mother had moved out of the manor and into the Dowager cottage which was actually a smaller replica of the manor. His father had built it for his grandmother years ago and it had lain empty for nearly ten years since her death. But Allan had always kept it well maintained and the lawns groomed because this was one of the places that he’d spent a lot of time at when his grandmother was still alive. He’d loved her and her death had devastated him.
“Mother, you’re looking well.”
“I’m surprised that your wife isn’t here with you, or will she be joining us later?”
Allan frowned slightly, taking a seat opposite the couch on which she was reclining, enjoying dainty pastries and leafing through various newspapers. His mother loved reading and he always made sure that she had all the journals, magazines and newspapers that would keep her entertained. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Her comment troubled him.
“That you barely come to see me unless your wife is with you. Sometimes I feel as if it is Samantha who pushes you to come and visit me.”
“Ma, you’re always up at the manor with us.”
“Still, it would be nice for a son to visit his mother once in a while in her own home. I come up to the manor frequently because that’s the only way that I get to see you. Else it would probably be a full year before I set eyes on my own son,” she sounded affronted.
“I’m really sorry about that, Ma,” and he meant it. It seemed to him that while he’d thought he was taking care of the two most precious women in his life, he’d actually been neglecting them. “Ma, I had no idea that I was neglecting you and it fills me with much remorse.”
Lady Irene Callahan observed her son through narrowed eyes, deep blue like his own and then noticed that he seemed to be under a lot of strain. A mother knew her son well!
“Something is bothering you,” she said at last, picking up a jam tart and taking a bite. “Would you like a cup of tea or something else?”
“No, I just had breakfast with Sammy.” And he didn’t deny that something was bothering him. “Sammy has given me until Christmas Day and then she’s leaving me.”
“Huh?” The Dowager’s hand paused halfway to her lips and then she brought it back down, dropping the half eaten tart on the plate. “What does leaving you mean?”
“Ma, Sammy hasn’t been happy for a while but I’ve been too busy to notice that. She says that she’s not the kind of duchess that I deserve and the implications are that I should divorce her and marry someone else.”
His mother nodded slowly, wiping her lips daintily with the napkin on her lap. “This was bound to happen,” she saw her son’s lips tighten. “And I’m not saying this to slight your wife, Allan. But the two of you are as different as chalk and cheese and it was only a matter of time before that began to affect your marriage.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You were brought up in a wealthy household and trained right from birth to be a duke after your father. You’ve mingled with the high and mighty of this land, met foreign dignitaries and even travelled abroad on many occasions. Samantha is from a very humble background and you’ve always protected her whenever anything threatened her peace and quiet. Is it any wonder that the differences in your lives are now coming to light? And I know that part of her decision is based on the fact that I require her to handle this year’s Christmas Eve Ball and the two smaller ones before that. Samantha feels inadequate and you, my son, are the cause of it all.”
“Mother if you knew that a problem would arise from your suggestion that my wife should handle the ball, why did you bring it up?” He felt anger stirring up within him.
“I did it to get Samantha out of the shell that you have her locked up in.”
“Or are you seeking to see her fail at hosting the ball so she can be humiliated and you can then tell everyone that your concerns have been proved right? Are you trying to show our friends and acquaintances that Sammy isn’t a suitable wife for me?”
“Pshaw!” His mother’s amused laughter grated on his nerves. “I must confess that when you first told me that you intended to marry my chambermaid, I really blew my top off. I feel ashamed that I opposed your decision and went all out to stop you from marrying Samantha. But I have seen this young woman do the impossible and I’m not ashamed to admit that I was very wrong about her.”
Her words soothed him and he felt his anger deflating. “What do you mean?”
“Samantha has given you a gentle heart which is what I always prayed for. Your grandmother who you loved, bless her departed heart, was a good woman but she spoilt you and after your father died I was afraid that you would become a wreck. That’s the reason I was so hard on you because I didn’t want you to turn into a worthless son of Belial. You had me scared for a while and I thought you would end up as another reckless dandy. But Samantha makes you think deeply and what’s more, she loves you wholly and genuinely. The girl would die for you should the need ever arise, though at first I had termed her as a gold digger and opportunist.”
“Mother!”
“You’ll be glad to know that I quite like that girl now. She has grown on me and that’s why I have been aware that she hasn’t been happy for a while now.”
“Then why didn’t you say anything before? Why leave it until things have taken a turn for the worse? I have only ten days to convince Sammy that she didn’t make a mistake by marrying me, that this marriage is worth fighting for, Mother, and I just don’t know what to do.” He held his head in his hands.
“Allan,” he looked up. “Would you have believed me if I had told you that your wife was unhappy; wouldn’t you have accused me of being a busybody out to ruin your marriage?”
Allan shifted uncomfortably in his seat because his mother was right. Had she approached him and expressed her fears about Sammy’s emotional state, he would have taken it as a ploy to slight and belittle his wife and ruin their marriage. And he would have lashed out at her. “I’m sorry Mama.”
“But not as sorry as you’ll be should you lose that girl. She’s a priceless gem and I’m disappointed that you never fully realised her true worth until it has come to this.”
“Mama, I always thought Sammy was happy and if she wasn’t then she should have spoken up.”
“And would you have listened to the poor girl? I love you Allan but you have the tendency to hear only what suits you. You may think that you listen to the womenfolk in your life but you have a weakness of overlooking what they are actually saying.”
“I have given Sammy everything that would make her happy and comfortable as my wife and the Duchess of Cumberland. Even you have to admit that she’s the envy of her peers.”
Lady Callahan slowly shook her head, “If you think your wife values possessions and materialistic things then perhaps she’s doing the right thing in leaving you.”
“Mother please don’t say that,” his voice was hoarse. If his mother thought Sammy was right to be thinking about leaving him then things were really bad. Where had he gone wrong and how hadn’t he noticed?
“Maybe it’s time that you faced up to the fact that you aren’t suitable for each other after all. It isn’t too late and you can then both go on and have better lives with other spouses.”
Allan shook his head, “Sammy is my life and I can’t bear the thought of losing her.”
“If she’s your life as you claim then perhaps you really need to understand her past and what has made her into the kind of woman that she is right now.”
He looked up at his mother, “How do I do that?”
“Tell me something Allan,” she sat up straight and put her feet on the floor. “What do you really know about your wife’s past life?”
“I…” He started then stopped. His mother was right. What did he really know about his wife’s past life before he marrie
d her? From the moment that he’d first set eyes on Sammy four years ago, everything else had paled into insignificance. He’d been solely focused on making her his wife that he’d always brushed any protestations away. Whenever she brought up anything that he didn’t agree with, he’d overruled her. But in his defence all he’d wanted was to be her protector and provider.”
“Well?”
“I know that Sammy is an orphan,” he said lamely. He was sure she’d mentioned something of the sort to him. “And she was brought up by her governess, Mrs. Covers,” he finished triumphantly but the sardonic look his mother gave him made him turn red.
“And?”
He waved his hands helplessly in the air.
“That’s precisely my point,” the Dowager told her son with much compassion in her eyes. “The two of you dazzled each other and for the past four years you’ve been too wrapped up in each other and your own love and self-centred interests.”
“If you feel that way then why does Sammy feel that I’ve been neglecting her? I also thought that we’ve been spending a lot of time together.”
“In a way she is right, you’ve been neglecting her. Marriage is all about adjusting to accommodate each other’s interests and also helping each other grow and become the best that you can be individually and then also together. Being overly protective of your wife isn’t healthy. Your wife needs to spread her wings and fly.”
“I just didn’t want Sammy to be hurt by people’s mean and unkind words and prejudices. You know how society can be, Mother.”
“By shielding her too much you’ve actually been hurting her. No one excels by hiding from adversaries. You should give her the chance to face up to her adversaries for that will build her character. Samantha is not a child and you need to give her room to grow into her role as the Duchess of Cumberland. When your father married me it wasn’t just smooth sailing all the way. I too faced society’s censure but your grandmother helped me to see that I didn’t have to be a weakling and let everyone walk all over me.”
“I’m so terrified of Sammy making mistakes that will have everyone looking down on her.”
“If she makes mistakes then you’ll be there to correct them. And if she falls, she needs to know that you’ll be there to catch her. Your wife feels worthless and if you ask me, she fears that you don’t trust her to be the kind of wife who is suitable to be a duchess. For a young woman whose life has been a struggle for survival, suddenly finding herself being overprotected, mollycoddled and pampered can be off putting. I know that many high society women would lap up such attention from their husbands but your wife isn’t one of them. If Samantha is to be happy in her role as your wife and duchess then she needs to feel useful. You see her as a weak and fragile little thing that shouldn’t be crushed. But don’t you realise that in order to get fragrance out of flowers and plants, they have to be crushed. Samantha is so much stronger than you’re giving her credit for and you’re doing her a great disservice.”
Allan bowed his head. He had servants to wait hand and foot on Sammy and all he’d wanted was for her to sit pretty and be his wife and duchess. Now he realised that his mother was right, Sammy wasn’t the kind to just sit still and be waited on. She needed to be doing something.
“So how do we get to the right place Mother, how do I correct all the wrongs that I’ve done?”
“That’s something the two of you need to work on together,” the Dowager rose to her feet. “If you need any more advice from me then bring Samantha along the next time you come to see me.”
“Am I really doing the right thing,” Sammy asked herself after she’d left her husband in the dining room after breakfast. Allan was a good husband and she knew that she had it so much better than so many of her peers whether nobility, gentry or even commoners. Being a duchess meant that she had met a number of wives of noblemen and gentry. Allan’s business interests were vast and he was acquainted with many people. Though many of the women had been snobbish and side-lined her, a few had become her friends. Not close though because she was very nervous around titled and entitled women. And she had tried not to let them intimidate her. So many times she’d wanted to beg Allan to cancel appointments and invitations to his friends’ homes but she’d held her tongue. She had put up with a lot for her husband’s sake and so that his peers wouldn’t criticise him for marrying beneath him.
And the few times she’d spent with her own peers had been very uncomfortable for her. The women loved to gossip about other people’s lives. It was from such social gatherings that Sammy had been shocked to learn that very few people placed high regard to fidelity in marriage. Infidelity both of husbands and wives was common among nobles and gentry and when some of those indulging in the vice were mentioned, it had shaken her to the core. Men and women that she’d held in high esteem were no better than the base born who gave into their human desires.
“It’s normal and you don’t have to look like it’s something so strange and new to you,” the wife of an earl had said. She was married to a man who was nearly twice her age and had no qualms about having a younger lover on the side. “My husband is lucky to have me and he’s said it himself so many times which is why he turns a blind eye to my indiscretions,” she’d giggled at Sammy’s horrified expression. “My husband provides for me materially while my darling Hans, the handsome German meets all my other needs as a woman. Besides, my husband has no reason to complain seeing as he knew that I was in love with Hans when he convinced me to marry him.”
And it was the same issue with many others. Or if it wasn’t the women having illicit relations with other men, their husbands kept mistresses with their wives’ full knowledge.
A baroness had put it in a way that had troubled Sammy even more. “At least he keeps her on the side but at the end of the day he comes back home to me and our children. It also gives me time to pursue my own other interests outside my home. Also, she will never bear him any children but I have four healthy sons and two daughters for my husband.” Sammy had wanted to scream that this wasn’t normal behaviour. Mrs. Covers had brought her up to honour marriage and the marital bed. That was the one thing that had made her lose some of the fear she had of the high society women. They were just human after all!
But one thing had been clear to her in all those conversations. Allan’s name had never once been coupled with another woman. And it wasn’t for lack of trying, so the women said. “Your husband is too prim and proper, never setting a foot wrong. I think it’s his mother’s influence on him,” a woman had complained. “Believe me, many have tried to proposition him but the man is just too faithful,” she had squinted at Sammy. “Tell me, how does a simpleton like you manage to keep your man shackled to your side so that he doesn’t stray?” Sammy had let the insult slide over her.
Sammy knew that Allan truly loved her and had fought for their love when others had been strongly opposed to the union. And many who had shunned her in the past now sought her company, if the many invitation cards that were dropped by the house weekly were anything to go by.
But Sammy was also very honest with herself. This wasn’t the kind of life she’d envisioned for herself. All she had ever desired was to have a loving husband to share her life and dreams with and spending quiet days at home. Drifting from one ball to the other or spending time with frivolous high society women was no longer the attraction it had once been. When Allan had first married her, something within had wanted to show the naysayers that she had what it took to be a duchess and the wife of one of the most sought after men in England. So she’d gone shopping with her peers, held high teas and all that. Yet all it did now was make her feel empty inside.
“There you are,” her husband’s voice startled her. “Sammy it’s cold out here and you have a very thin shawl. You’ll get sick. Let’s take you inside.”
Sammy became aware of her surroundings and that she’d wandered far from the house. “I hadn’t intended to come out this far.”
Allan took
off his own coat and slipped it around her thin shoulders. She was surprised to see him around the manor during the day and mentioned the fact to him.
“I have ten days to prove to you that I can be the husband you need, the man you deserve and woe unto me if I waste a single moment of the time I have.”
4
The Testing
“What is the true meaning of Christmas?” Allan looked up at his wife. “That’s what this note from Mother says.”
“Let me see that,” Sammy drew closer to her husband and looked over his shoulder. They were in their morning parlour having just taken midmorning tea. “What do you think Mother means by this?”
Allan’s shoulders went up then dropped, “I wish I could understand how this all fits in with my desire to make things right in our marriage. Mother can be so cryptic sometimes.”
Sammy sat beside her husband and Allan was glad to note that she’d done this of her own free volition. In the past he would have had to coax her into joining him on the wide settee because she was so shy. A servant entered the parlour, curtsied and handed the duke a second note from the silver salver in her hand.
“What’s this?” He unfolded the note. “It’s another note from Mother.”
“What does this one say?”
“Give up our very selves, consider others and think only of them,” he raised his eyes to Sammy. “Do you understand any of this? I should never have introduced my mother to the world of puzzles and riddles. She’s teasing us with her words.”
Sammy touched his arm, “Mother knows what she’s doing and I think I understand her.”
“Really?”
“Think about the previous Christmas holidays ever since you and I got married,” Sammy said softly. “At a time like this, ten days to Christmas, what would we be doing?”
Allan was silent for a brief moment. “I would be slaving away over a guest list and wondering who to invite and who to leave out, worrying about offending some people since we can’t invite them all. And then Mother and I would sweat over the shopping list of all that is required to make this the ball that will be talked about for the coming year. And then I would be thinking about getting to my tailor to have a new suit or even two fitted,” he nearly squirmed in his chair, his face quite red. “Then I would also be thinking about how grand I have to look since I’m the duke. I host marquises, earls, viscounts and barons from this county so they can continue to see how important I am.” Shame filled his heart when he thought about all the vain things he’d done in the past.
Amazing Love This Christmas: Historical Holiday Romance Page 3