‘Well, I wanted you to have something that might fill in some of Izzy’s childhood for you. I know it’ll never be the same… it’s not a consolation…’ I stopped babbling and tried to smile. ‘We just wanted you to see everything.’ We’d had our favourite photos on my phone printed out for him, and Izzy had put them all in an album.
‘That’s really thoughtful,’ he said, looking across at me. He smiled a little and then opened it up. ‘Tell me what the photos are of then,’ he said to Izzy. I sat back and sipped my wine as Izzy and Drew took a journey through her childhood. I had documented as much as I could, perhaps thinking that one day he might get to see it, but also because of how much all of it meant to me. I could see it affected him. He paused over each photo, asking questions, listening and smiling at his daughter now as he compared her to the pictures. His voice broke a couple of times, and I saw a tear escape his eye when he saw her first school photo. It was painful to see how much he regretted missing those years, and I felt guilty, but he smiled as well, and I knew he was touched by our gift. It was a real mixture of emotions for all of us I think.
‘That really was the perfect gift,’ Drew said. ‘Right, time for you two.’ He got up and grabbed one from the tree. ‘This is for you, Iz.’
Izzy ripped into hers quickly. She pulled out a Harry Potter notebook.
‘I thought as you loved reading so much that maybe you should start writing your own stories,’ Drew said. ‘And I thought what better than a notebook to write them down in?’
‘I love it!’ she squealed. ‘Thank you, Dad,’ she cried, giving him a big hug.
I started. It was the first time she had called him that. Drew’s eyes met mine, and he beamed. I could see how much it meant to him for her to call him Dad, and my heart swelled with warmth.
‘Look, Mum,’ she said, coming over to show me.
‘That’s such a great idea. I bet you could write a great story,’ I told her, giving her a squeeze. ‘I can’t wait to read it.’
‘Time for your gift now,’ Drew said, passing a small box to me. His eyes met mine as our fingers brushed, and I felt a shiver run down my spine.
I opened up the present, wishing my heart wasn’t beating quite so hard. I was worried that they’d be able to hear it. When I opened the box, I let out a small gasp. I pulled out the delicate chain which had a crescent moon and small star hanging from it. Drew had bought it for me for my sixteenth birthday, but I had left it in his car before he had gone to America. ‘You kept it all these years?’ I asked him, slipping it through my fingers.
‘I thought you might one day come back for it,’ he replied. ‘Here let me put it on.’ He jumped up and lifted it around my neck. I tried to keep my breathing steady as he held up my hair to do it up. ‘I got this for your mum when she was sixteen,’ he explained to Izzy. ‘It was to remind her that wherever in the world we were, we were still both under the same moon and stars.’
‘I missed it,’ I managed to whisper.
‘Can I see?’ Izzy came over to look at it. ‘It’s so pretty.’
‘Just like your mum,’ he replied, and then looked a little startled by his words. I kept my eyes on Izzy, not daring myself to let my eyes meet his. I touched the pendant. I had always seen it as a good luck charm, and I hoped that it still would be.
We heard the front door open then, and Drew jumped up to greet Heather and Rory, Izzy hurrying out after them.
I stayed where I was for a moment, still touching the necklace, my heart beating hard beneath it.
Chapter Thirty-Two
‘Right, I think our food will be ready now so let’s go into the kitchen,’ Drew called out then.
I got up and followed them into the kitchen. Heather gave me a hug. She looked lovely in a velvet dress, and Rory looked the smartest I had ever seen him as he poured out wine for all of the grown-ups. Drew was lighting candles on the table, and Izzy was putting out cutlery. I sat down at the table and took a long sip of wine. Butterflies were still dancing in my stomach at Drew’s words earlier, and the necklace he had given back to me felt like it was burning a hole straight through to my heart.
‘Right, direct from America, my signature dish,’ Drew said, when everyone was sat at the table, carrying over a steaming bowl. He lifted the lid with a flourish and we all leaned forwards to breathe in its delicious smell.
‘I feel two stone heavier already,’ I commented as he handed me a plateful of macaroni and cheese, bubbling, with crispy pancetta on top.
‘Calories don’t count at Christmas,’ Izzy quipped.
I laughed. ‘I think they are very wise words,’ I said, tucking in. ‘Wow, Drew, this is so good.’
‘I told you it’s world famous,’ he said, with a grin.
‘You’re a modest cook, aren’t you?’ Rory joked to his brother.
‘Sometimes you have to be honest about your qualities. What do you think, Iz?’
She just smiled as she tried to swallow a massive mouthful.
‘I think she’s a fan,’ I replied. He looked at me across the table, and we shared a smile.
‘So, are we all ready for tomorrow?’ Heather asked as she tucked in.
‘I think so,’ I replied. ‘Mum phoned the council to invite them along to the opening, so hopefully, someone will be there, and they’ll see the village is worth saving.’
‘I really hope so,’ she replied. I knew how much it meant to her to keep the library from closing, and I hoped that we could do it.
We somehow polished off the mac and cheese, and then sat back, all feeling stuffed. What was it about Christmas that gave you the green light to eat twice as much as you usually would? Whatever it was, I was fully on board with it.
After we cleared up, we all went back into the living room. It was pitch black outside, but the room was warm and cosy. Drew closed the curtains and lit a candle on the mantelpiece. The smell of frankincense filled the room.
‘Have you already opened presents?’ Rory asked, looking at the tree.
‘Well, we’re not seeing one another tomorrow,’ Drew explained with a shrug.
‘In that case then…’ Rory grabbed a package and handed it to a surprised Heather. ‘You better have yours too.’
‘For me?’ she asked, staring at it.
‘For you,’ he confirmed. ‘Go on then,’ he said, turning to us with a wink. We watched as she ripped open the wrapping and pulled out a pair of sparkly silver Wellington boots. ‘You said they had to be sparkly for you to wear them,’ Rory said as Heather burst out laughing.
‘Oh my God! I love them,’ she said, jumping up and giving Rory a kiss on the cheek. To say he was now the surprised one was an understatement.
‘Well, I expect to see them on you next time you come to the farm,’ Rory said, sitting down, his cheeks a little pink.
‘That sounds like an invitation,’ Heather replied. Drew and I exchanged a smile; it was impossible not to notice their flirting. I wondered if they were even aware of it.
Drew turned to Izzy and me then. ‘What do you both usually do on Christmas Day in London?’
‘We usually go to Emily, Sally’s niece who lives in London too, for lunch. Then we go back to our flat and watch a film or play a game together. It’ll be strange to be at the Hall again. But nice, too.’
‘I can’t wait for Sally’s food,’ Izzy said. ‘Do you think they will all play a game with us?’
‘What’s your favourite?’ Drew asked her.
‘Monopoly, but it’s not fair because Mum is so good at it. She always wins.’
Drew raised an eyebrow at me. ‘That sounds like a challenge.’
‘Only if you can accept inevitable defeat,’ I replied with a smile.
Heather and Rory’s attention was called away from her boots, and Izzy set up the game on the coffee table; Drew bringing over more drinks, and a tub of Quality Street.
‘I want to be the dog,’ Izzy said. ‘Mum, do you want the hat?’
‘It’s my good luck charm,
’ I said, grabbing it for myself.
‘Go easy on us,’ Drew said to me, smiling across the table.
‘I’m sorry, guys,’ I replied. ‘But I’m not called The Champion for nothing.’
‘No one calls you that,’ Izzy piped up.
‘Well, they should,’ I replied.
‘What is it about board games that makes everyone so competitive?’ Rory asked. ‘I remember Drew sulking for a week once when I beat him at Guess Who?’
‘I did not sulk,’ Drew retorted.
‘You just either have it or you don’t,’ I replied. And he threw a cushion at me. ‘Hey!’ I spluttered. ‘Seriously? How old are you?’
‘Come on,’ Izzy complained. ‘Let’s start.’
We quietened down to get the game going, and they were soon moaning that I was getting all the best properties. I just laughed. I loved this game. ‘I can’t afford any of these in real life so that’s why the universe lets me have them in the game,’ I told them.
‘Is there a Scottish version? We should play that one up here,’ Izzy said.
‘I’ll find out,’ Drew promised. ‘But I might not let your mum play it with us.’
‘That’s just sour grapes,’ I said. I rolled the dice and landed on the property I had been eyeing to groans from the group.
‘Don’t let her have any sweets for that,’ Rory said, snatching the tin from me.
‘I warned you all,’ Izzy said, in a sing-song voice, when the game was over and I’d won by a landslide.
‘There might be money in this – we could hustle unsuspecting strangers,’ Drew suggested.
‘Hustle? Bro, you really need to leave Boston,’ Rory told him. ‘Right, we need more drinks!’
‘Can I have a quick word?’ Drew said quietly to me as Rory went to the kitchen and Heather and Izzy went to look at the other board games they had. I followed Drew out, curiously, and we walked into the hall. He grabbed a bag hidden behind the door. ‘I bought Izzy a few more things: can we put them in your car, and you can surprise her Christmas morning?’
I smiled, touched by his thoughtfulness. She would love that. ‘Of course.’ We went outside into the cold night. The sky above us was clear and shining with stars. There was a stillness to the air, and I wondered whether more snow was on the horizon.
Drew carried the bag over to my car and heaved it into the boot.
‘You didn’t need to do that,’ I said, as he shut it again.
‘I wanted to. There’s something else in there for you, too, something I actually paid for this time.’
‘Nothing could top this,’ I admitted, my hand reaching up to touch the necklace. I never wanted to take it off again. ‘I still can’t believe that you kept it for all these years.’
Drew smiled. ‘It belongs to you, and I knew I’d see you again.’
‘You did?’
‘I knew one day you’d come back here. Glendale is your home. I can’t imagine you in London, you know.’
‘I can’t really imagine you in Boston either.’
‘Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something. Get your thoughts on it…’
‘Oh?’
‘Not now. We better be getting back.’ Drew nodded towards the house. He looked up. ‘The stars are out tonight.’
‘It feels like it might snow.’
‘Izzy would love a white Christmas, wouldn’t she?’ He looked at me, and we shared a smile. ‘I certainly didn’t expect to be spending time with my daughter when I came back.’
‘Coming home really has been full of surprises,’ I agreed. Not least the reigniting of all my old feelings for Drew. Alone, under the stars, I looked across at him and I wished I knew how he felt about me.
‘It certainly has,’ he agreed. He ran a hand through his hair. ‘Maybe I should tell you now. I…’ He began, looking a little nervous. It was impossible to stop hope from flooding through my veins. Maybe he felt this was a moment, too. He was about to continue when we heard gravel crunching; light suddenly flooded the driveway. Confused, Drew turned, and I followed his gaze to watch a car drive up to the farmhouse. ‘Who could this be?’ He wondered aloud.
The car stopped by us, clearly a taxi, and out of the backseat emerged a pretty, blonde woman. I looked at Drew whose mouth had dropped open.
She climbed out, and then the taxi driver got out and went around to the boot to grab a suitcase.
‘Hi, baby,’ she said when she was standing in front of us, beaming at Drew, her American accent out of place in the Scottish countryside. I felt like a bucket of iced water had been drenched all over me as she threw her arms around him. Drew’s eyes met mine. I looked away: their embrace was too painful to watch. ‘Well… are you surprised?’
Drew pulled back. ‘Really surprised. What are you doing here, April?’
‘I’ve come for Christmas. Like you wanted!’
‘But you said—’
‘I know, I changed my mind. I missed you so much.’ She finally noticed me. ‘Oh, who’s this then?’ she asked, her voice staying upbeat, but I didn’t miss her eyes narrowing a little.
‘This is, uh, Beth,’ Drew replied. He wouldn’t look at me.
She wrapped herself around Drew and smiled at me, flashing dazzling white teeth in the glow from the taxi headlights. ‘Hi there. I’m April – Drew’s girlfriend.’
Chapter Thirty-Three
‘Mum! We’re going to play Cluedo next…’ Izzy’s words faded away as she stood in the doorway, calling to me, before noticing that Drew and I were not alone.
Izzy broke me from my spell, staring at April open-mouthed after her revelation. I turned quickly and hurried over to Izzy.
‘Actually, Iz, we need to be going. Drew’s, uh, friend from Boston is here and they need to catch up,’ I hissed at her, dragging her into the farmhouse with me as she looked over my shoulder curiously at the newcomer. I saw April turn to ask Drew who the little girl was, and I had a flash of pity for how he was going to explain to his American girlfriend that he’d just discovered he had a daughter, but then I remembered he hadn’t mentioned April to us, at all, and my sympathies faded somewhat.
‘What’s going on?’ Heather poked her head out of the living room.
‘Drew has a visitor,’ I said, trying to keep calm, as Rory was behind her and I didn’t want to show how upset I was. ‘His girlfriend has come over from Boston.’
Heather’s eyes widened. ‘Girlfriend?’ She spun round to face Rory, her hands on her hips. ‘Did you know he had a girlfriend?’
Rory looked a little surprised at how furious she was. ‘Yeah, they’ve been together a while. They live together over there.’
‘They live together?’ I repeated, dumbfounded. Why hadn’t Drew said anything? ‘Izzy, grab your things, we need to go,’ I implored her. Then I heard the front door close.
‘You’re not going?’ Drew said from behind me.
I just couldn’t face him, terrified about what my face would betray. ‘I think we better, it’s getting late and there will be loads to do tomorrow before the trail opens.’ I sighed with relief as Izzy reappeared with our things. I pulled my coat on quickly and reluctantly turned around. Over Drew’s shoulder, April stalked upstairs with her suitcase, clearly annoyed that her surprise hadn’t gone as planned. I was relieved she was going out of sight.
‘Wait, I wanted to introduce—’ Drew began.
‘Can we do that when we see you tomorrow?’ I begged him, not sure I could bear to watch Izzy meet April just yet. I needed to get my head round this. ‘That is, if you’re still coming…?’
‘Of course I am,’ he replied. ‘Okay. Izzy…’ He went over to her to say goodbye.
Heather hurried over to hug me. ‘Call me in the morning,’ she whispered as she gave me a tight squeeze. I nodded and waved to Rory over her shoulder. He still looked a little shell-shocked.
Drew led us out, opening the door for us. Izzy went out to the car, but as I passed Drew, he touched my arm and I was forced to stop. �
��Beth, I feel like I need to explain—’
‘There’s no need,’ I cut him off firmly, hoping that my voice didn’t sound as shaky as it felt. ‘Good night,’ I said before I hurried out after Izzy, willing myself not to turn around.
‘Who was that woman, Mum?’ Izzy asked when we were in the car, ready to leave.
My knuckles were white as I gripped the steering wheel. ‘Drew’s girlfriend – apparently,’ I replied, switching on the engine. Drew was still in the doorway, watching us. The evening had promised so much and now that was all over. I took a deep breath and forced myself to remain cheerful for my daughter. ‘Right, let’s go home.’
Izzy waved to her dad as I drove out of the farm. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing in my rear-view mirror as I drove down the gravel driveway, but Drew was already walking back inside.
‘Are you okay, Mum?’
I turned on the radio to save me from having to answer, and she was soon singing along to the Christmas songs, leaving me to try to hold it together until we went to bed, when I had no doubt the tears would come. I had deluded myself that Drew might not only be able to forgive me for the past but might see his future with us too. It was all just a fantasy though. He had a life already in Boston and someone to share it with. I would just have to let my fantasy go and ignore the fact that I had started to fall in love with him all over again.
* * *
I woke up the next day without any time to dwell on last night’s events.
‘Happy Christmas Eve!’ Izzy cried when she flung my bedroom door open early in the morning. ‘Come on, Mum, get up! It’s the trail day!’
I smiled as I heaved myself out of bed. ‘Go get breakfast started, I need a shower to wake up,’ I told her, watching her skip off. I couldn’t suck any of the excitement out of the day for her; I had to push Drew to the back of my mind as much as possible. I stood under a steaming hot shower and closed my eyes, letting it pour over me, wishing I could erase the image of Drew hugging his girlfriend in front of me out of my head.
Coming Home to Glendale Hall Page 17