Forbidden Love

by Phillips, Laura

  Anna tried not to read too much into what she was saying. She didn’t want to get her hopes up.

  “So…,” Lara said as she ran a hand through her loose waves. “I made a decision to end things with Jake. I don’t know how… I mean, he thinks we have a perfectly normal marriage. I don’t want to just… drop this bomb but at the same time I know that I can’t stay with him… And he has to know that I’m not happy. I don’t know how long it would take to officially be divorced but I need to start making some changes in my life.”

  Anna watched Lara wipe away a tear that trickled down her cheek.

  “Hey,” Anna said as she pulled her into a hug. “Everything’s going to be okay…”

  “Except for this latest complication.”

  “We’ll figure it out.”

  “I know this hasn’t been easy for you,” Lara said as she pulled away, so she could meet Anna’s eyes. “All the sneaking around and the secrecy… But it’s going to have to continue for another ten months… until you graduate.”

  “I know.”

  “That is… if you know… you want to wait for me,” Lara rambled. “I would completely understand if you didn’t. I wouldn’t-”

  Anna smiled. “Of course, I’m going to wait for you. Are you sure you want to wait for me though?”

  “Yes,” Lara said, returning her smile. “I have to. You’ve turned my life upside down, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  “I should be bawling my eyes out right now,” Anna said with a soft laugh. “We’re pretty much breaking up for almost a year but… I feel like it’s all going to work out.”

  “I’m so shocked that you feel that way.”

  Anna playfully hit her on the arm. “I’m being serious. It will.”

  “I know,” Lara said, her smile moving to her green eyes.

  “You said this is the job that needs someone for the school newspaper?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’m supposed to be signing up for that,” Anna said. “My guidance counselor thinks it’s a good idea.”

  “So, we’ll still see each other?”

  “Several times a week I’m sure. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. It’s going to be so hard to behave.”

  “I know… especially after last night.”

  “What time do you need to be back tonight?” Anna asked.

  “Seven or eight.”

  “We still have a few hours…”

  “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Lara asked.

  “I sure hope so.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Anna pulled up outside her house that night and wandered inside, still in a daze.

  The weekend had gone by in a blur. Parts of the drive home had been awkward and at times Anna had to blink back tears.

  When they’d finally left the cabin, they agreed not to have a dramatic, tearful goodbye because it wasn’t really a ‘goodbye.’ It was just a long break and they’d still see each other at school.

  They avoided talking about how they’d manage the next few months. Anna just wanted to enjoy the last few hours they had together.

  Now that she was back at home, she didn’t know how to feel.

  She was restless.

  It was relatively early, but she’d said goodnight to her parents a few minutes after she’d gotten home.

  She needed to be alone.

  Ten months… That’s all it is. And we can still be friendly. We just can’t… cross that line again. Not until June.

  They hadn’t talked about it, but Anna decided not to contact Lara unless she did first.

  As tempting as it was, she wasn’t going to be sending her texts anymore.

  It was going to be hard, but they had to keep their distance otherwise they might slip up.

  And this break might do them some good.

  Anna had always been worried about Lara just deciding that she’d rather stay with Jake.

  If Lara went for months without seeing Anna, without kissing her, she might realize how much she wants this.

  Yes, Lara told me that she was going to end things with Jake, but I won’t believe it until I actually see it.

  She just needed to keep herself busy this year and she’d get through it. She wanted to get into UCLA and study journalism. The school newspaper would be her new obsession even though Lara would be involved.

  But… moving to California for four years and leaving Lara behind was another problem that she couldn’t think about just yet.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Anna had double and triple checked her schedule. Lara Preston was not her English teacher. She didn’t think she could cope with it if she was.

  Anna did sign up for the school newspaper and Lara was the advisor. But she knew that was going to happen and part of her was glad to have that amount of definite contact with her.

  Having her as a teacher would have been too formal.

  At least with the newspaper, it was much more relaxed, and they’d probably have time together on their own even if they couldn’t do anything.

  When Anna’s first day was over, and she hadn’t even caught a glimpse of Lara, her heart was racing as she sat in room 137 waiting for Lara to arrive.

  Anna had already met with the four other people interested in the paper. Now she could see why her guidance counselor wanted her to sign up. No one else was.

  The other four students didn’t want to make any serious commitment, so she ended up volunteering herself to be the editor.

  This was what she wanted though: to be busy. But being the editor also meant being the one who met with Lara.

  Part of her was happy. She’d get to see her several times a week, but she didn’t know how long that would last.

  Eventually, she’d become frustrated with the situation and hopefully it wouldn’t turn into resentment.

  Anna couldn’t sit still. She got up and went to look out the window. The football team were running drills and to the right she could see the track and field team stretching.

  “Hey.”

  Anna turned when she heard the familiar voice. “Hi,” she said with a warm smile that she couldn’t hide.

  “I was hoping you’d be the editor, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up,” Lara said as she crossed the room to stand beside Anna.

  Anna tried not to stare. When they were together during the summer, Lara had dressed casually and hardly wore any makeup.

  Now, Lara was wearing a charcoal pencil skirt and a white blouse. Her hair was in loose curls, her green eyes brighter than Anna had ever seen them thanks to the smokey eye shadow that she wore.

  “I didn’t even have to fight anyone for it,” Anna said, suddenly self-conscious in her jeans and a scoop neck top. “What do you think so far?”

  “This is the best school I’ve ever worked at.”

  “Wow.”

  “I know it’s early yet,” Lara said as she held Anna’s gaze. “But everyone’s so nice. This,” she said motioning between them, “is the only problem.”

  “Right.”

  “But I’m still prepared to wait… if you are?”

  “Yes,” Anna said, releasing the breath that she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Of course…”

  “We’ll just get through these next few months.”

  Anna nodded. The scent of Lara’s perfume was driving her crazy.

  “It won’t be easy,” Anna said with a sad smile as she blatantly looked Lara up and down. “You’re so sexy,” she said in a whisper.

  Lara’s cheeks flushed. “Thanks,” she said softly as she glanced down at Anna’s lips before darting her eyes away. “It definitely won’t be easy.”

  Anna’s eyes traveled the length of her body again before looking away too.

  Lara cleared her throat. “Okay…So we should probably get to work.”

  “Yes,” Anna agreed. She swallowed the lump in her throat and was surprised to feel her eyes tearing up.

  It suddenly
hit her how hard the next few months were going to be, and she didn’t know how she was going to make it, especially when there were probably going to be more problems at the end of it.

  Anna would be leaving for college and Lara had to leave her husband, not just talk about it but actually leave him.

  She followed Lara over to teacher’s desk at the front of the room, using it as their workspace.

  Anna never had as much trouble concentrating in her life. Every time Lara would lean across her to reach for a sheet of paper or their hands would touch, Anna felt like the room was spinning.

  She had to get over this quickly or the school year was going to be a very long one.

  Chapter Fifteen

  5 Months Later

  February 2010

  Anna didn’t know how she’d made it this far. Spending two or three evenings with Lara, alone in a classroom, was a toxic mixture of teasing and torture.

  Anna knew they’d both been flirting with each other.

  It started out professional for the first few weeks but because they were usually alone, comments were made, and both of them were willing to play along.

  But Anna needed those evenings together.

  When Lara had gotten the flu in December just before Christmas break, they hadn’t seen each other for almost three weeks and Anna thought she might go crazy.

  But she knew that those evenings also were slowly torturing her. Being so close to Lara and not being able to touch her was a miserable struggle.

  Next week was Winter Break so they wouldn’t see each other for another week and Anna was trying to figure out a way to see Lara that was legit, but she couldn’t come up with one.

  Except… She knew that the cabin was free for the last weekend of the break. Her brother wanted it from Sunday to Friday. She could get it for Saturday and Sunday at the end of her week off.

  Her parents would probably worry about her going up there on her own in the middle of winter, but she could always use the pressures of senior year as an excuse. She’d be able to get so much more work done up there in the peace and quiet.

  She could spend some time with her brother and his family and then just stay on for a few extra days.

  She was pacing room 137 now. Lara had just stepped out to take a phone call and then they’d be wrapping things up.

  This could work… But will Lara go for it?

  She has more sense than I do…

  Anna looked up from the papers that were spread across the desk in front of her when Lara walked in.

  “Sorry about that,” Lara said as she took a seat beside Anna. “So, are we all set?”

  “Yeah. I think so.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “What?”

  “You have that look…” Lara said, leaning back in her chair to study her.

  “That look?”

  “Yes.”

  Anna sighed. “Okay… I’ve been thinking… Are you free next weekend?”

  “I think so. Why?”

  “The cabin’s free.”

  Lara leaned forward to rest her elbows on the table and run a hand through her hair which was straight today. Even in black slacks and a long-sleeved scoop top Anna had trouble taking her eyes off her.

  Lara turned to meet Anna’s eyes. “If we do this… How are we going to go back?”

  “I don’t know but I’m at the verge of going insane.”

  “I know,” Lara said softly. “Me too.”

  “No one would know… My brother’s got the cabin until Friday. I would be up there already, so no one would see us driving together… We’d be going home separately.”

  “You have it all planned out,” Lara said with a smirk.

  “I nearly went crazy over Christmas break. Not even being able to call you or send you a text…”

  “I know… And it’s only February.”

  “So… What do you think?” Anna asked.

  “I think that it’s a really bad idea, but I don’t think I can turn it down. I don’t know how we’ll go back to this for another five months, but we’ll just have to figure it out.”

  “So you’ll be at the cabin on Saturday?”

  “Yes,” Lara said with a smile that lit up her entire face.

  “I really wish I could kiss you right now,” Anna said, smiling back at her.

  “Saturday…”

  “I guess I can wait another week,” Anna said as they both packed up their things and got ready to leave.

  Chapter Sixteen

  On Saturday morning, Anna woke up early to tidy the cabin and pick up some groceries.

  They agreed before the school year started not to communicate by phone or email anything that could be seen as unprofessional, so Anna had no idea what time Lara would arrive at.

  As the morning wore on, Anna found herself checking the time more often.

  She was busy but now she was running out of things to do. The cabin was spotless, and she knew what she was going to cook for dinner.

  The snow had started falling an hour or two ago, but it was just a light dusting.

  She’d checked the forecast to make sure they weren’t going to get snowed in and they were only predicting three to six inches for the weekend.

  Anna brought in some wood from the pile out the back and started setting up the fire.

  The river rock fireplace was probably her favorite part of the cabin and she had a lot of good memories over the years of sitting beside it with her family.

  She wished she could tell them about Lara. She didn’t know how they would take it.

  She knew that she’d have to tell them eventually, but she was tired of dodging questions about boyfriends and still being single.

  She didn’t want to come out without being able to tell them about Lara.

  Soon… Just a few more months.

  Anna sat back from the fire as the flames jumped up through the kindling. She added a log now that it was going and was just about to get comfortable on the couch when the doorbell rang.

  She took a deep breath as she padded over to the door. There was only one person it could be.

  She double checked her reflection in the mirror on her way to the door.

  She’d left her blond hair down and wore jeans and a black sweater and had a light layer of makeup on.

  She opened the door to see Lara standing there in a gray winter coat and a black scarf wrapped around her neck. Her dark hair left down and straight, blew gently as the light breeze pushed through it.

  “Hey,” Anna said backing away from the door, so she could come in, bringing a blast of cold air with her.

  “Hi.” Lara had an over-sized black handbag slung over her shoulder that must have had everything she wanted for the weekend in it.

  Anna closed the door while Lara left down her bag but her green eyes never left Anna’s.

  Anna leaned her back against the door as Lara stepped forward, her eyes glancing down at Anna’s lips.

  They didn’t say a word.

  Anna reached out to pull Lara into her and their lips met in an intense, passionate kiss that was brimming with emotion.

  Lara’s hand cupped Anna’s cheek while their lips parted against each other’s. Her hand was cold against Anna’s cheek, but she didn’t care. She needed Lara’s touch.

  Anna moaned softly as Lara’s tongue met hers and it felt like the ground beneath her had shifted.

  Anna felt a tear trickle down her cheek and then Lara pulled away.

  “Hey...,” Lara whispered as she met Anna’s eyes. “It’s going to be okay… We got this far.”

  “I know,” Anna said as she quickly wiped away the tear. “Sorry. I don’t know where that came from.”

  “It’s okay.”

  Lara wrapped her arms around her and Anna took a deep breath, the scent of Lara’s perfume invading Anna’s nostrils as she rested her head on Lara’s shoulder.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” Lara whispered.

  “I've missed you too.
” Anna pulled away and reached for Lara’s hand. “You’re freezing,” she said as their fingers interlaced. “Sit by the fire for a while.”

  Anna led them over to the brown leather couch and Lara took off her jacket and hung it over the chair beside her.

  “I didn’t pay much attention to the fireplace the last time but I’m glad it’s here now,” Lara said as she leaned forward with her hands outstretched, trying to warm them.

  “There’s nothing like an open fire,” Anna said. “Do you want some mulled wine?”

  “Uh…”

  Anna could see Lara struggling to decide if she should say something.

  “I’m having the non-alcoholic version,” Anna said as she got up. “Which do you prefer?”

  “I’ll have the same as you. Thanks.”

  Anna went into the kitchen to warm up the mulled wine and fill two glasses. She came back into the living room as Lara was taking off her boots and leaving them by the fire to dry.

  “Here you go,” Anna said as she handed her a glass and they both sat down on the couch across from the fire.

  “Thanks.”

  “So you didn’t have any trouble getting away this weekend?”

  “No and nobody knows where I am,” Lara said as she took a sip. “Hmm… This is delicious.”

  “I’m up here to get away from the stresses of senior year and to get a bit of work done.”

  Lara smiled as she left her glass down on the pine coffee table in front of them.

  “I was going to make a smart comment until I realized that you might actually be stressed,” Lara said.

  “I’m not… I mean… Apart from this situation… I should have a few good options for college. I have nothing to stress about.”

  “Good… Because I meant to ask you… Are you okay with me being the newspaper’s advisor? I can find another English teacher to split the duties with if seeing me is getting stressful…”

  “Are you kidding? Knowing that I get to see you after school is pretty much the only thing that’s keeping me going,” Anna said as she took another sip and left her glass down. “Unless it’s awkward for you…”

  “No… Well it is. Maybe not awkward exactly but it’s hard. I thought it would get easier as the months went by but it’s actually getting worse. I’m hoping this weekend will help but I have a funny feeling it’s going to make things even more difficult when we get back… But it’ll be worth it,” Lara said with a smile as she turned to face her on the couch, tucking her legs in underneath her.