If You Adore Me

by Ciara Knight

  Knox rubbed his scalp, the heated, anxious feeling driving him to want to do something stupid, like ask Stella out on a real date. “I guess this means she’s going to pass on my show, then.”

  “You marching over there will only make things worse.” Lori yanked him, this time until his feet moved in the direction she wanted him to follow.

  “Don’t let them out of your sight,” Knox ordered, as if Drew still had to follow his commands.

  “I’m on it.” Drew saluted and jogged to the corner Stella had disappeared around.

  Knox followed Lori in the opposite direction. He was losing it and needed to get a grip before he blew everything. In the past, he’d focus on controlling the situation and bending people to do what he needed, but Stella didn’t bend. “I’m not sure this guy is ever going to follow through on my show.”

  “You’re worried that he’s wasting your time and he’s going put all his attention into his car and Stella.”

  He halted. “Don’t you even care? Bradley stated he wanted the car show if I wanted to sign that contract. That’s what you told me. And I can’t get five minutes with him to discuss our options. All of our hard work is going to be for nothing if we don’t get a grip on this.”

  “You worry too much.” Lori stepped back and took a breath. “You really like Stella, don’t you?”

  He ran a hand through his hair and walked down the sidewalk toward the office. “That’s not what this is about.”

  They walked in silence, and Knox realized denying it to himself was one thing, but Lori already knew what was in his heart. “More than I should.”

  “Why?” Lori caught up to him. “You can’t protect yourself forever.”

  He reached the old building turned temporary office and wrenched the door open. The smell of musty old walls and overstained hardwood floors welcomed him inside. “She’s not interested. If she were, she wouldn’t be with Bradley.”

  The door slammed behind them. He walked past the old shop turned recreation center for the elders turned empty space and headed up the old creaky stairs.

  “She’s not into him at all. I’ve seen the way she looks at you. Trust me, if she’s into anyone, it would be you.” Lori flipped on the light to reveal green paint peeling from the corner and the smell of day-old coffee.

  “You should try to go spend some time with her, show her that you’re trustworthy.” Lori plopped down on the couch and propped her feet up on the old coffee table. “What you don’t want to do is turn into controlling, combative Knox.”

  He sat in the chair behind his desk and grabbed the little green man stress ball. “I already proved she could trust me. I found out what the mug shot was for, and I promised not to tell anyone. She opened up to me and I thought we connected, but then she pushed me away.”

  “Why should she trust you?” Lori asked.

  Knox squeezed the stress ball, watching the eyes bubble between his fingers. “I told her to. What else can I do?”

  Lori sighed and dropped her feet to the ground. “A girl as strong as Stella doesn’t open up to a guy easily.”

  “She didn’t mean to. She thought I knew the truth.” He released his grip and squeezed again.

  “So she spilled her guts and then you opened up to her, right?” Lori did that judgmental, I-know-you-blew-it expression.

  He blinked at her. “What?”

  “You told her about something that happened in your life?” Lori sat on the edge of the desk. “I know you don’t want to talk about it, but you need to tell Stella why you’re distant and closed off to her.”

  A prick of warning at the direction of their conversation made his jaw twitch. “I’m not. I told you that we talked and I told her she could trust me.”

  “Words are empty promises that are usually broken. Think about it. Would you want to be around Stella if she knew the truth about what happened to you in Iraq, and then she promised to keep it a secret? You wouldn’t feel comfortable. You’d feel like she knew too much. You’d feel vulnerable, and you wouldn’t like it. I’m guessing that Stella is a lot like you and she doesn’t want to see you because of how exposed she feels when you’re around.”

  “That’s ridiculous.” He tossed the stress ball against the wall and caught it.

  “Really? Think about it. Bradley’s easy, a business relationship. One she can hide behind to focus on what she does best: hiding under a car.”

  “Yeah, so?” He tossed the ball against the wall again, but Lori caught it this time.

  “Remind you of anyone we know?” She looked down at him. “Pours himself into work and avoids any real connections with people to keep from feeling any real pain?”

  Nineteen

  Stella eyed the ticking time bomb clock. Only ten more minutes until she escaped from wedding planning torture and into a free dinner to discuss cars.

  “Don’t twist the tulle that way.” Jackie grabbed the white netting from her hands. “You do it this way. In the shape of a rosebud.”

  Carissa rolled her eyes and knotted the fabric into a big puffy ball. “Like this?”

  Jackie dropped the perfect rose shape into Stella’s lap. “No! Look at Felicia’s.”

  Felicia shrugged. “Flowers are my thing, remember?”

  “Okay, Mrs. Switzerland,” Stella snipped.

  “What’s up with you tonight? You’re more sassy than normal.” Mary-Beth abandoned her attempt at a flower on the table and scooted to the edge of her seat. “I heard that you and Mr. Bradley walked here together. How will Knox feel about that?”

  Stella tore the fabric. “Oops.”

  Jackie shot an angry stare over her shoulder. “You did that on purpose, knowing I would do it for you if you messed up.”

  “I didn’t think of that. But now that you say it…” Stella smiled like an innocent child.

  Jackie snatched the ripped tulle from her hands. “Give me that. You’re all hopeless. Fine, you can go, but on Friday you will help finish the centerpieces.”

  “You do know that the wedding is over six months from now.”

  “I know, and there’s so much more to do.” Jackie untwisted Stella’s fabric and set it in the large wicker basket.

  Mary-Beth placed hers in the basket and then sat next to Stella. “So, what’s the scoop? You courting Bradley now? Knox out, Bradley in?”

  “Courting? What are you? Sixty years old?” Stella snagged her jacket, despite the warming temperatures. “No one is in.”

  “Oh no, you don’t. Where are you off to so fast?” Carissa sidestepped in front of Stella. “We want to know what’s going on. We don’t know this man and don’t know if we approve of you dating him.”

  “I’m not dating him.” Stella gnawed on the inside of her cheek.

  Before she could escape, there was a circle of four around her, Carissa in front and the rest at her sides and back. “You guys about to chant or something? I feel like I’m in a witches’ circle about to be turned into a toad.”

  “No toad.” Felicia leaned around her shoulder and tapped Stella’s nose. “But I think that’s growing. You a cousin of Pinocchio’s?”

  She swatted Felicia’s hand out of her face. “No date. No lies. No need to approve.”

  The friend circle didn’t budge.

  “Why are you dressed up today?” Jackie asked her from behind.

  “I’m not. I’m in jeans and my jacket like usual.”

  Mary-Beth joined the interrogation. “Your nice jeans. The ones you only wear when you’re going out to eat or to a movie.”

  Carissa adjusted Stella’s jacket. “Are you going to meet Bradley for dinner? I mean, he escorted you here and everything.”

  “He didn’t escort me. He was walking this way, so we walked together.” Stella slid between Carissa and Mary-Beth and managed to reach the door. She didn’t like the interrogation about Bradley, but it was safer than answering questions about Knox. The man who kept her up all night with confusing dreams and thinking about what ifs that woul
d never be. The man who knew too much. She was ready for him to leave town, but at the same time she wanted him to stay.

  Life sucked.

  “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do to win a rich producer’s attention,” Jackie said in a sexy tone.

  “I’d never resort to your level to get what I want.” Stella burst through the door to escape the friendship fire ring. Of course, she should have just told them the truth since they’d know thirty seconds after she sat down inside the diner with Bradley to discuss the car.

  The senior bus parked outside Maple Table and the screech of the lift lowering made Stella stop short of the front door. No. It was Wednesday, but the seniors were always done eating by five and on the bus by five thirty. Davey shuffled up to the door and tried to open it for Stella, but he only fell into it.

  “Let me get that,” Stella said. “Hey, isn’t it like…bedtime for all the elders?”

  Davey tipped his Cuban-looking hat at her. “Yep, but the bus driver couldn’t get the lift to work, so we couldn’t go since Mr. Parker’s gout is acting up and he can’t climb the stairs. What are you doing here?”

  “Business meeting.”

  Davy half danced through the door. “Is that what the young people are calling it these days?”

  Trapped holding the door open for the elders who moved slower than a slug on valium, she had to stand there and listen to Davey.

  “You know, in my day, I’d pick the young woman up at her front door. The men who didn’t were not the kind a woman should be out with. I remember a boy honking his horn to take my sister out—me and my brother went out and taught him how to be a gentleman.”

  “I guess the boy was more respectful after that.” Stella managed to escape when a gentleman took the door from her.

  “Nope. He never showed up at our house again. Apparently we ruined our sister’s dating life and no boy would ask her out after that.” Davey hiked up his highwater brown pants and took Melba by the arm. “This way, my dear. I ordered the best table in the house just for you.”

  Stella spotted Bradley already sitting at the table dead center of the diner. He looked like he worried about small-town contamination with his hands resting on his thighs and his posture straighter than Mrs. Malter’s walker. Great… She’d made the mistake of looking under the 916’s hood and falling in love with the project before she technically had it. She needed to keep Bradley from running from Sugar Maple before they reached an agreement.

  “I know I’m a couple minutes late. I won’t be on the car restoration. Today was unique since we were wedding planning for the mayor and it took longer than I’d thought.”

  He bolted to his feet and pulled her chair out for her, as if he knew Davey would be watching and scoring his manners. “You sure you don’t want me to take you somewhere more…quiet?”

  The elders crowded around a long table, and two of them picked up a fork and knife and pounded them against the table, chanting, “We want our food. We want our food.”

  “They weren’t supposed to eat at this time. They eat at five o’clock, but we’re here now. Unfortunately, this is it for Sugar Maple dining that I’d be willing to eat at. We’ll have to make do.”

  Bradley tucked her under the table and then lifted his hand like he was summoning a wine sommelier to order some expensive Cabernet.

  The waitress shot by. “Just a sec, you two. I’ll be right back. The natives are restless.” She went and plopped some sodas onto the elders’ table and removed her pad and pen.

  “Best settle in,” Bradley said apathetically. “Looks like we aren’t her priority at the moment.”

  Considering she was facing the town elders with a late dinner, he had a point. And knowing she didn’t want Bradley witnessing Davey with low blood sugar, Stella unrolled the silverware and placed the napkin in her lap. “She’s trying to keep the peace so that we don’t suffer. We can discuss the 916 while we wait, though.”

  Bradly nodded. “That’s why we’re here. Shoot.”

  “I’ve finished the list, and I’ll email it to you as soon as I return to the garage.” With her hands hidden under the table so he couldn’t see her picking at her nails like she always did when she was nervous, she said a silent prayer that the man would agree for her to do the work. She needed the money, and she needed it now. So, she took in a deep breath and spilled the grand total on him. “It’ll cost around twenty thousand to fully restore the 916 into a show car. That’s with everything vintage like we discussed. I’ve priced the parts out, and it really is the least expensive you can manage with a serious discount on labor.”

  She held her breath. This could be her way out of all this. To concentrate on the car and forget the show. She’d calculated the labor costs to the penny of what she needed to keep her shop from being torn down.

  “Okay.”

  Stella blinked at him. “Okay so you want me to send you the list to look over?”

  “No. I already knew how much it would cost. I know what I’m doing. I don’t make mistakes,” Bradley said in an authoritative tone.

  She let out a long breath. “Okay, so…”

  “So get to work.” Bradley eyed the waitress, as if deciding business was concluded and maybe the meal wasn’t necessary. “To be honest, you came in seven thousand less than my guy.”

  Her breath caught, knowing she had to push a little further with the next question she had no choice but to ask. “Can I get half the money prior to starting and half when the job is done?”

  “I usually pay at the end,” he said in a light tone, as if ten thousand was of little significance to him.

  She fisted her hands under the table, willing him to agree, and said the next thing she’d rehearsed in the mirror last night. “Then you’ll have to work with your other guy. You see, I don’t overcharge, which means I need the money so that I can order all the parts and keep the lights on while I work.”

  He let out a long huff, showing his patience was thinning at the lack of service. “Fine. Email me your bank routing and account numbers, and I’ll make the transfer tonight.”

  “What can I get ya both?” The waitress had better timing than Mayor Horton attending to town business.

  “I’ll have the chicken with potatoes, and the lady will have the same.”

  The waitress chuckled. “The usual, Stella?”

  “Yes, the lady will have the usual.” Stella slid her chair an inch away from Bradley.

  Bradley swirled his ice around in his water. “A woman who knows what she wants. I can respect that. I can see why Knox is less focused on his show and more on you.”

  Stella snagged her water and downed a few gulps. “You’ve got it wrong. There’s nothing between Knox and me. I’m just not interested in fame and fortune. His show is the last thing I want to do, yet the town needs me to agree.”

  “I’ll be honest. If you don’t do the show, I’m going to push Knox back until this Sugar Maple series ends and I see how his ratings stand. The only reason I was interested now was because I knew a car show would redeem him from his fiasco from before. Once his image is fully restored, the network will make him an offer.”

  “So his future is determined by my decision?”

  “I’m afraid it is, but you need to do what’s best for you,” Bradley said, as if discussing the weather, not the fact that she held a man’s hopes and dreams in her hands.

  She downed the rest of the water and smacked the empty glass down on the table in hopes the waitress would run over and refill it, but unfortunately the elders had her busy. She’d never felt so alone around so many people before. “I will think about it more and give him and you an answer soon.”

  “You have three days. I’ll be leaving to attend to business back in LA and will return to check on my car and your answer when I’m done.”

  Stella nodded mutely, unsure what to say.

  “Then our business is concluded. I have my jet waiting, so I need to head out.” Bradley lifted his hand to order the
waitress over. “Check please.”

  She halted near their table with a tray full of glasses resting on her shoulder. “You haven’t had anything but water.” The waitress slid her pad from her pocket and shrugged. “Nothing to charge you for, but feel free to leave a tip.”

  “So you won’t pull the show until you return?” Stella asked, her pulse hammering against her neck.

  “I don’t make promises until a contract is signed. There are many options and directions I can choose for my next season.”

  Bradley headed for the door, and that’s when Stella realized what she’d done. She hadn’t only jeopardized Knox’s future, but that of Sugar Maple. That of her best friends, who counted on her so they would have their turn to show off their businesses. How could Stella look at herself in the mirror if Felicia lost her nursery or even if Jackie lost her dress store?

  A knot of indecision tightened her gut. Maybe she could work with Knox on the car restoration show and forget her own wants and needs to avoid the world of fame she despised so much for the sake of the town.

  Maybe.

  Twenty

  Knox walked up the street mumbling to himself. “Stella, I realize how vulnerable you must’ve felt.” He threw his hands up in the air. Great. Lori had him talking to himself now. He was two steps from crazy.

  This was ridiculous. Why did he have to open some gaping wound to talk to Stella? He could just tell her he understood and that he’d had some bad things happen to him that he didn’t want to talk about. That should be enough. She either liked him or she didn’t. He couldn’t force her. Still, if she chose Bradley’s car offer over his show, he couldn’t be with her. So what if she didn’t want fame? She was tough enough to handle the attention. Wasn’t she? Was it all an act? No woman could be that tough.

  He’d made a mistake believing that about Alima, and that hadn’t ended well at all.

  In the distance, he saw a couple pressed up against the side wall of the diner. As he neared, he knew the woman to be Stella and the shmuck getting handsy was Bradley. He hotfooted it toward them. When he was within earshot, he heard them talking, so he stopped to listen.