Finding Her Amish Love

by Rebecca Kertz

  He grinned at her. “Nay, but if I see something interesting, we’ll stop and take a look.”

  Daniel steered the horse through several turns that took them onto a number of country roads. They passed an ice cream shop in the middle of nowhere. “They make great ice cream here,” he told her. “We’ll come back when the place is open. ’Tis run by members of our community, and therefore it’s closed on Sundays.”

  Emma loved that Daniel had suggested another outing together. If things continued to go well, she’d be able to enjoy going for ice cream with him. If not...she didn’t want to think about her situation and how she could be long gone before she ever had a chance to drive back for ice cream.

  Thoughts of Bryce Turner gave her chills, and she rubbed her arms.

  “Cold?” Daniel asked after a glance in her direction.

  “I’m fine.” His concern made her feel good. She was safe with Daniel. Bryce would never search for her in an Amish community. She was sure of it.

  Daniel drove through a few turns, then headed back toward the main road. Before they reached it, Emma saw it—a white house set back from the country lane about a hundred feet or more. Next to it was a small barn and beyond that a smaller outbuilding. The house was plain enough for her to believe that it belonged to an Amish family. There was a for-sale sign in the front yard.

  Without thinking, Emma instinctively put her hand on Daniel’s arm. “Daniel...”

  “I see it,” he breathed. He pulled over to the side of the road. The sign had a phone number and said the house was for sale by the owner. “Joseph, would you come up front and take care of the horse?”

  Daniel climbed down from the vehicle. “Emma?” He reached up a hand, and she allowed him to lift her down. Together they both walked down the fine gravel driveway toward the house.

  “Do you think anyone is home?”

  He stared at the house. “I don’t think anyone is living here at present.”

  Emma nodded. She accompanied him to the house. They went to the front door, and he knocked. After waiting a few moments, Daniel knocked again. “You’re right. Looks like no one is here.”

  Without saying anything, they went to a window and looked in. There was no furniture. The vinyl floors looked as if they had been installed recently. They walked around to the back of the house and saw a kitchen with a refrigerator and stove as well as oak cabinets. “It looks nice,” Emma murmured.

  “Ja,” Daniel said quietly. Emma could sense his excitement. As if he liked what he saw and was considering buying it. Emma envisioned Daniel living here with a wife—some other woman—and felt a sadness wash over her. But she couldn’t worry about that. She was here with Daniel right now, and she was glad that he allowed her to share this with him.

  “Shall we look at the barn and outbuilding?” Emma asked.

  “Gut idea.” But Daniel was already moving in that direction. He went to the barn first and opened the door. The inside was empty, the stalls clean. So far everything was in move-in condition. Then he led her to the small building in the backyard. It was a ten-by-ten building with a window. The door opened easily, and whatever he saw inside made him gasp. “Perfect,” he said. “This place is perfect.”

  Emma knew then that Daniel wanted this place—and badly. She said a silent prayer that he would be able to afford it, that no one jumped in to purchase it out from under him before he had his chance to make an offer.

  He shut the door. “We should go,” he said quietly. His expression was thoughtful, worried. At that moment, Emma wanted to give him all the money she had—just under three hundred dollars. If it helped him realize his dream, she’d be fine with giving it all away. She’d figure out a way to get by once she left Happiness. She’d done it before, and she could do it again.

  The ride home with Daniel back at the reins was quieter than when they’d started out.

  “Nice place, Daniel,” Joseph said. “Going to buy it?”

  “If I can, ja,” Daniel muttered, his grip tight on the leathers.

  Emma felt the urge to cover his hand with hers. “You’ll find a way,” she murmured, believing it to be true.

  He shot her a surprised look. Staring at her a moment, his face erupted into a genuine smile. “Danki, Emma.”

  She frowned. “For what?”

  “For believing in me.”

  She blushed and looked away. He was more than competent in anything he did. Why did he question it? Unlike her, who couldn’t decide what to do. The best thing she’d ever done was come back to Happiness to see Leah. She sighed. Her temporary place with the Stoltzfuses was nothing she could take credit for. It was because of Leah and Henry and everyone else.

  * * *

  Daniel heard Emma sigh. “What’s wrong?”

  She smiled at him reassuringly. “Nothing to worry about.” She paused. “My birthday is in three weeks.”

  “And you’ll be eighteen,” he said gruffly. The thought of her leaving bothered him, although he’d always known that the day would come. “It’s too bad you couldn’t stay here...” he murmured.

  He felt her tense and sensed her gaze on him. “Forever? Daniel...”

  “I know. You can’t stay.” You don’t want to stay, he thought bitterly.

  “I don’t belong here,” she whispered.

  Daniel looked in her eyes, saw the sorrow in them, the tears. Something jolted inside him. “Emma—”

  “Hey, look!” his sister exclaimed, pointing toward a vehicle parked on the side of the road close to the dirt entrance to his family’s property.

  “That’s David Fisher,” Joseph said with surprise.

  Hannah started to stand up to better see. “Do you think he’s come to ask forgiveness?”

  “Could be,” Daniel said, but he doubted it. The man was seated in his buggy, and he hadn’t made a move to get out. No doubt he missed his family members who were in his parents’ house.

  Daniel turned on his left blinker and turned into the lot. “Don’t look at him. Don’t make eye contact,” he told Emma and his siblings. “I hate this, but ’tis not allowed since he was shunned.”

  Emma hadn’t said a word, but he could feel her withdraw from him, her shoulders so tense that he wanted to reach out and rub them for her. Which, of course, he would never do, as it wasn’t proper unless they were husband and wife. Daniel’s jaw tightened. Which they’d never be, as she would be leaving them—him—in three weeks. Suddenly, the excitement of finding the perfect place for his business and new home disappeared. But he would work for it anyway. Whether Emma stayed or not, he would start his harness shop business, and eventually wed and start a family.

  Emma didn’t wait for his help getting out of the carriage. He watched her stride toward his aunt and uncle and their family, watched her speak to Leah, who frowned and stood up to follow Emma, who moved away from the others.

  What was she telling them? Was she reminding them that her birthday was just around the corner and she’d be leaving soon? Was she telling them about David Fisher, the shunned man who had parked his buggy in the street in front of the house?

  Emma left Leah and went to the beverage table. He watched her pour two cups of tea. To his shock, she headed in his direction. “I thought you might be thirsty,” she said softly. She held out a cup to him.

  He held her gaze, begging to know her thoughts, as he nodded and took the cup from her. He smiled his thanks.

  “I had a nice time today, Daniel,” she began carefully, and he sensed a “but” coming. “I hope you get the house and the property. It’s perfect for your business and your home. I’ll be thinking of you living there someday, happy with a wife.” She stopped. “And children.”

  “Emma, we still have time to spend together.”

  She shook her head. “Do you think that’s wise? Knowing that I’ll have to leave?”

 
“I don’t care if ’tis wise. I want to see you and take you for ice cream again. We can go to that ice cream shop we saw today, or we can go back to Whittier’s.” He took a sip from his cup. It was all he could do to keep his hands steady as he lowered his drink. “Think about it, Emma.”

  She nodded. “I will.”

  And he could only hope and pray that God would allow him to find a way to keep them together, because Englisher or not, he wanted Emma in his life—as he was realizing more and more that she was already in his heart.

  She remained by his side for the next hour until Missy and Arlin decided it was time to go home. She’d been overly quiet since their conversation about ice cream and spending more time together.

  “I’ll see you in the morning, Emma,” he said as he walked her toward Arlin’s carriage.

  Emma frowned as she looked up at him. “In the morning?”

  “To take you to work? At the Yoders’ store,” he gently reminded her.

  “Ah, ja. Sorry.”

  “Emma, are you oll recht?”

  “I’m fine.” Her smile—which didn’t quite reach her eyes—didn’t reassure him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  As he watched her leave with his aunt and uncle, he felt an ache inside his chest. And a sense of foreboding he didn’t understand.

  Daniel joined his parents, who were talking with Bishop John. David Fisher was a relative of the bishop’s, and John was unhappy with the man. “You saw the buggy parked out front, Bishop?” he asked as he came close.

  The bishop nodded. “I’d hoped that he would come in, but if he expects us to accept what he’s done when he shows no repentance, it’s not going to happen.”

  “Would you like me to approach him?” his father asked.

  “Nay, he knows the rules. We are not to talk with him, look at him or do business with him. If he wants to enjoy the delights of the English world, he should have thought of that before he joined the church.”

  Daniel couldn’t imagine being ostracized by his family. He loved and needed them too much to ever give them up. Plus, he couldn’t think of any reason he’d ever go against the Ordnung. He excused himself with a nod toward the bishop and his parents.

  Daniel sought out his cousin Leah, who was there with her husband Henry.

  Leah saw him heading her way. She left her sisters and family to meet him halfway. “You look as if you have something on your mind.”

  Daniel nodded. “May I talk with you?”

  “Ja.” She settled one hand on her protruding stomach while the other one waved him away from anyone who remained.

  When they were alone on the side of his father’s barn, Daniel met her gaze. “I like Emma.”

  Leah laughed. “No kidding.”

  His expression grew serious, concerned. “She’ll be eighteen soon, and then she’ll be leaving.”

  “I know,” his cousin murmured with sympathy.

  “Tell me what they did to her. Her foster parents.”

  “Her foster father and brother,” Leah said.

  Daniel felt his jaw tighten with tension. “Tell me.”

  “That day when you brought her to me? She had bruises on her arms. I made her show me, but I think she hid the worst of them.”

  “They mistreated her?”

  “Ja, emotionally and physically.”

  “She needs to stay with us,” he stated firmly. “With me.”

  “Emma may be hard to convince, but if anyone can, ’tis you.” Leah eyed him with a small smile. “She cares for you.”

  Emotion rushed through him, and he closed his eyes. “I hope so.”

  “Have patience with her, Daniel,” she said. “Love is worth it. I almost gave that up with Henry because I was afraid. Don’t let her be afraid, Daniel. She needs you, and you need her.”

  Daniel smiled as determination rose up in him to give him more than hope. It gave him purpose. He wanted that house and land more than anything. Emma might be English, but he believed she’d be happy within the Amish community. He’d seen her grow from an unhappy runaway foster child to a warm, loving and hardworking young woman.

  “I’ll convince her,” he said, and at that moment he believed it.

  * * *

  It was time. After a wonderful evening at home with Arlin and Missy, Emma went upstairs to bed—and to plan. While she wanted to give Daniel all of her money, she knew it wouldn’t make sense for her to do so. She’d need every cent for a safe place to stay until she turned eighteen and got another job. She would miss Missy and Arlin. The thought of leaving them hurt terribly. But it was the knowledge that she wouldn’t see Daniel again that broke her heart. She’d never be the same after her time here. Knowing that she’d had the love of these people, even for a short time, would sustain her through the long lonely days and nights ahead of her.

  She lay in her bed, still dressed, listening as Missy and Arlin ascended the stairs and retired to their room at the end of the hall. Her heart thumped wildly in her chest. Her stomach burned, and her hands were clammy. She was scared. She wrote a note and placed it on the dresser. After another hour or so, when she was sure Missy and Arlin were asleep, she rose, took her money and put most of it in her shoes. Fortunately, the sky was clear, the stars twinkling brightly against an inky backdrop. There would be no rain tonight, no thunderstorms to terrify her during her journey.

  She pulled on her sweater and buttoned it all the way up. She glanced at her Amish garments. Traveling in them wouldn’t be ideal, but it was all she had now. She hadn’t seen her English clothes since she left them with Leah. If she found a thrift store, she could buy some clothes. She’d draw less attention to herself if she blended better in the English world.

  She left a hundred dollars on the bed, covering it with the note. She hoped Missy and Arlin would understand, and that Daniel would forgive her.

  Her heart was breaking as she grabbed the new flashlight that Missy had given her recently and descended the stairs. Jeremiah was in the kitchen, curled up in his bed. She figured it was best to leave him there when she went up earlier, but now she wondered if it wouldn’t have been better to lock him in her room.

  The little dog had received a lot of attention from her when they’d returned home. He was obviously tired, and her crossing the kitchen to the side door didn’t wake him. Sending up a silent prayer of thanks to the Lord, Emma opened up the side door, turned the lock on the inside, then pulled the door quietly shut behind her. She headed into the night with her destination unknown. Daniel. What she wouldn’t give to see him one more time. If she did, she knew her resolve would weaken, and she’d stay. And she would risk losing him when he learned the truth. It’s better this way.

  She was blinded by her tears as she left the property and headed away from Happiness, away from the city of Lancaster where the threat of discovery still remained. She would walk until she found a hotel that she could afford, even if it was just for one night. She had two hundred and sixty-eight dollars after leaving the money for Missy and Arlin. Poor payment for a lifetime of warm and happy memories, she thought. They deserved so much more from her.

  The sound of a car behind her made her take cover in the bushes in a neighbor’s front yard. When the vehicle roared passed, she walked along the side of the road again, quickening her steps. She needed to get somewhere fast so she could feel safe again.

  If she ever would feel safe again.

  * * *

  Daniel steered his buggy toward Missy and Arlin’s house. He was eager to see Emma. He’d been awake most of the night thinking of her, trying to figure out a way to convince her that she should stay in Happiness. And wed him when she was older and ready for marriage. He pulled into his uncle’s yard and parked. It was early, but he knew Arlin and Missy would be up. Emma, too.

  He tied up his horse and ran to the side door. He tapped on the wood and smil
ed when as expected his aunt opened it with a grin. “Daniel, come in.”

  “Mornin’, Endie Missy.” He saw his uncle at the table. “Onkel Arlin.”

  His uncle nodded. “If you’re looking for Emma, I’d check the barn. I haven’t seen her this morning, but that’s where she always is first thing.”

  Daniel grinned, then nearly ran toward the barn. He burst inside. “Emma!”

  No one answered. “Emma! ’Tis me. Daniel. I’d like to talk with you.” When she didn’t answer, he checked every inch of the structure, then hurried back to the house to see if she’d come down for breakfast. “She’s not in the barn,” he said as he entered.

  “She was tired last night,” Missy said. “Maybe she slept late.” She set a mug of coffee for him on the table. “Sit. I’ll go up and check on her.”

  Daniel sat down to drink his coffee. He heard thundering on the stairs before Missy appeared, her face distraught, a handful of twenty-dollars bills in one hand and a note in the other.

  “She’s gone,” she cried. “Emma left us. She’s gone!”

  Arlin stood and took the note from her. Daniel rose, his stomach clenching as he thought of the woman he loved and where she could have possibly gone. His uncle’s features changed as he read Emma’s note. When he was done, he silently handed Daniel the note and sat down, his face ashen.

  Dear ones,

  You will never know just how much your kindness has meant to me. I have felt truly happy here, and if things in my life were different, I would have stayed. But I’m trouble. Bryce Turner will no doubt be searching for me. I saw something I shouldn’t have seen before I ran away. He is not a gut man. Bryce is evil, and so is his son. I love you and will miss you. Please pray for me, although truth be told I don’t deserve your attention or your prayers. Please thank Leah and Henry for me. Without Leah, I would not have enjoyed even a few moments of feeling safe and loved. Tell them I’m sorry.

  There was a spot on the page that looked as if it had been marked by a tear. Daniel felt his throat tighten.