“Sargeant!” she shouted, as firm and commanding as Cabo Jones had been. “You cannot allow a member of our escuadra to be treated this way! It is against protocol!”
He sighed and pulled Jasper off of me with Welorian’s help, then turned on me. “Get up, soldado. We have a mission,” he commanded, firm, ignoring the bloody mess I must be. I sat up, groaning in pain.
“Sir, you can’t expect him to continue on like that,” Catt said, gesturing at me on the ground. When Smallwood hesitated, she continued. “He needs medical care.”
“We have a mission and our team needs our help,” he responded, pointing north at the fading figures.
She studied me for a moment as if judging my worth, then turned back to him, jaw set. “Under your command, you have allowed a member of this escuadra to beat a fellow member to the point that they need medical care. To refuse that care is a direct violation of his rights and I will report you if you do not allow it immediately.”
His eyes harden. Without looking away from her, he directs Welorian and Emi to catch up with the others.
“Why can’t I go, sir?” Jasper asks.
Smallwood turns on him, all fury. “Because if this one,” he begins, jabbing a finger towards Catt, “wants protocol, I have to bring you back for a formal reprimand.”
He pulled me to my feet. “Let’s go.”
-
Back at Caddo Station, Sgt. Smallwood left me with Catt to get cleaned up and took Jasper to the Lieutenant in charge.
“Thank you,” I told her, wincing as the wash rag dabbed at my wounds.
She continued in silence for multiple moments before responding. “The rules are there for a reason,” she said, finally. I nod.
“Why did you stop walking?” she asks when she’s done as much as she can.
I study her, unsure if I should answer. She didn’t stand up to Smallwood and Jasper to help me; she did it because she believes in the rules. If I’m honest, the rules would tell her to turn me in as well. I shake my head instead of answering, unsure if she’ll take it as refusal to answer or that I am uncertain with my reasoning.
She turns and I follow her back to the front of the station, but turns and puts her finger over her lips as we begin to hear voices.
“What would you like me to do, sir?” Smallwood asks.
The Lieutenant sighs, deep. “If the talist won’t follow orders, send him back to Rockwall. They can decide if they want to execute him or give him a dose of the serum.”
“And Cataleya Walry?” Smallwood asks.
He laughs once, short and derisive. “If she can’t accept how things have to be done, even if it isn’t exactly pristine, then she can go back to Rockwall, too.”
“Yes, sir.”
Catt and I share a look, then sneak away before they catch us listening. We pack our things and Smallwood sends us back to Rockwall together before the others even return.
-
The guards at the gate send for Cabo Jones. When he arrives, he takes the letter Sgt. Smallwood sent from Catt, reads it in silence, and then walks us through the common area to the wall we were directed to climb as a team months ago to talk privately.
“What happened, Walry?” he asks.
“Sir?” she questions. Wasn’t everything detailed in the letter?
He lifts the folded letter. “This isn’t like you two, so I’m inclined to believe it isn’t the full story.”
She glances at me, then turns back to Sir. “You want my candor?” When he nods, she continues. “Sgt. Smallwood continually allowed Jasper free rein with Gray. We were assigned a mission and Jasper attacked him. Smallwood turned his back, but I demanded that he be treated fairly as a member of our team.”
“Why isn’t Jasper back here with you?” Sir asks.
She shakes her head, choosing her words. “I doubt that he’s been reprimanded, sir.”
He nods. “The letter says that Gray refused orders.”
“He didn’t refuse; he hesitated. We were being sent to attack a talist settlement and I believe he was making peace with his duty.”
He studies me, then turns back to Catt. “He didn’t refuse to attack the settlements or do anything to harm the mission?”
“No, sir. Jasper didn’t give him the chance to act one way or the other,” she answers. A fair assessment, she leaves it open whether or not I would have obeyed or not. Though I had made my choice, it is true that Jasper didn’t allow me carry it out.
“Go find a bunk, Walry,” he tells her, kindly. “I’ll find you a more suitable assignment for you as soon as possible.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Haven, come with me,” he says, leading me to the main entrance. “I shouldn’t ask whether you chose to obey or not, should I?” he asks when we get to a deserted stretch of hallway. I stay silent and he doesn’t push me.
A few doors down from the clinic, he knocks on an ajar door. Inside, Eliza stands from a desk to answer, then gasps when she sees my face. “What happened?”
“A member of his team attacked him on a mission,” Sir answers honestly. He hands her the letter. “His commanding officer has requested that he be given the serum or executed, believing that he was attacked for disobeying an order.”
She purses her lips. “You sound like you disagree.”
He nods. “I do, but I wouldn’t know for sure. If Crow agrees, I can find him another assignment.”
“I don’t want another assignment,” I say before I realize I’ve spoken. They both look at me.
“If you don’t accept another assignment, you’ll be given the serum,” Eliza tells me. Though we don’t understand his motivations, we both know that Crow wouldn’t choose to execute me.
—You wouldn’t be a talist anymore, Gray.
I nod, slowly, accepting my options. “This is just going to keep happening,” I say, motioning to my face. “Talists aren’t welcomed and, even when I stand there and take it, it is blamed on me.”
Sir grips my shoulder. “Not everyone is like Dell or Smallwood. Let me know if you change your mind.”
When he’s gone, she walks me to the clinic for care. At the door, she turns to face me and speaks just loud enough for me to hear. “I’m sorry that we don’t have any Aqua or Ignis to treat you faster. Crow is out on a trip, so you’ll have to wait for his return. Think about it, though; you have until he’s back to change your mind.”
17
Peony
I can hear shouts coming from Haven before it comes into view. The voices are not ones I recognize and the tone of them is not friendly or even scared. They are angry. They are violent. I break into a run, determined to get there faster and find out what is going on. I realize, as Jax meets my stride to my right, that mere weeks ago I would have hidden rather than run into battle. Now, however, I push that thought aside and do what needs to be done.
I can make out soldiers in green uniforms circling the perimeter of the cabins. Do I stay back and try and figure out a plan or do I barrel in and hope the element of surprise is with me?
“They’re ransacking the house, searching,” Jax whispers. “Barley must have gotten everyone away beforehand.”
“Is there anything we can do to stop them?” I ask.
“Anything that we would do would reveal ourselves and if this is just a check, we need to let them do their thing and get out.”
“Do you really think this is just a check? Didn’t they already attack once, decimating the old location?” I ask, then study him as he considers our options.
“If it isn’t a check, either we die or they do. If we die…” Jax says, kind of shrugging with his hands. “If they die, Trinity will surely notice when they don’t come back.”
I nod my agreement; we wait. Jax leads us back towards the cabins so that we can monitor their progress. We kneel down behind a grouping of trees. I watch as pairs of soldiers circle. They are on alert, watching the cabins and the surrounding woods for movement. I count three pairs and I’m sure t
here are many inside as well.
Despite finding no one, they continue to wait for someone to return, or attempt to attack.
I feel Jax’s hand on my back as he rubs his thumb in a circular movement between my scapulae. He’s Terra and I’ve witnessed him able to sense an animal’s fear and calm it. I realize that’s exactly what he’s attempting with me. I close my eyes and concentrate on each muscle that I tensed up in worry. Whether we fight or not, stressing won’t help.
The sky above opens up with a loud crack as rain begins falling heavily. All at once, Haven is havoc as the others close in and attack.
Almost immediately the soldiers holster their guns, unable to aim or shoot accurately through sheets of rain blowing sideways. They pull out knives instead, ready for hand to hand combat.
Elerion and Iris approach a group, lowering themselves into fighting stance. Jax melds next to me and moves to attack from the shadows. He and Win pull soldiers back by their necks, grappling until they are disarmed and dealt with. Sage ducks just in time to dodge a punch and brings up his shoulder to guard as he pounces forward to hammer his fist into the soldier’s chest. All use their elements to strengthen themselves.
Some of those that came here with me from Anza’s camp join in, but they aren’t as experienced. Duck is taken down before anyone can help him via a knife plunging down into his neck. Jordan’s blood soon mixes with his, streaming away in the floodwaters.
I’ve been training for weeks with Jax and I know that now is the time to apply it, but I’m not sure where I fit into the fight. Who do I attack? There’s so many.
Jax’s stealth helps him finish off two soldiers in quick succession and Elerion downs a third. As they move to help Win, another moves behind Iris and holds his knife to her neck.
“Surrender yourselves peacefully or this one dies!” he shouts.
A single tear breaks free and slides down Iris’s cheek and I’m back at The Compound. Every single person that died in front of me, every person that has haunted my dreams since our escape returns. Without thinking, I focus on every molecule of water inside of the soldier’s body and I call it outwards in one sharp movement. He screams in pain one second before his body explodes.
-
When fire comes into play, everything breaks apart. A single spark can grow from a flicker to a blaze and, as it expands, everything it touches breaks apart from a whole into fragments and then, eventually, into only ashes.
We brought the bodies north of the cabin, dragging them far enough away that the others won’t have to be a part of this. With four of us all bringing a body each, it takes three trips. Here, in the woods, we stack the soldiers in a pile.
Elerion strikes a match against the box before tossing it atop them and, even though Barley sends the wind the opposite direction, the stench floods my nose. I drop to my knees, covering my face with my hands, and cry. My body heaves and a moan escapes my lips. I cannot, however, pull my eyes away.
They char black. The skin, muscle, and fat disintegrate. The remaining bone gleams white, encompassed by the fire. Heating it further, the flames glow blue until the bone crumbles. And we stay here like this: silent, watching as the fire dies down into nothing.
“Are you alright?” they ask me. Thirteen died yesterday by multiple hands but I’m the one that they ask. Do they think of me because my kill is the only body not here? Or because I was the least likely to have acted as such?
“I don’t regret it,” I say, my voice rough. I don’t. What I did was necessary and I don’t feel remorse for it. Perhaps I am supposed to feel that sorrow regardless, for killing another person. Maybe I should feel shame for not grieving that act.
I don’t.
“Are you alright?” Jax asks me again later. He found me near where we normally train, sitting on a log looking out over a stream. I give him a look in response.
“You can be honest with me,” he prods, sitting down next to me.
“I’m not the only one that killed one of them,” I respond, giving voice to my thoughts.
“No, but you’re the only one not talking about it,” he says. Are they opening up? I hadn’t noticed.
“It felt good to be able to do something. I’ve been practicing with you and I do well sparring with you—I think—but I froze. When the soldier grabbed Iris I acted, but it was like that.”
He nods, a smile playing on his lips. “That’s ok, you know. I’m teaching you skills that you can use to survive, to give you confidence, or never use at all. The point is that you have the skills if they’re required.”
I consider his words, remembering how I felt when we rushed towards the noise. “They did give me confidence,” I tell him. “I might not have attacked, but I didn’t run. I would have run before you.”
He laughs. “Progress!”
I smile back.
“So you’re really fine with the kill?”
“If I’m honest, I think it’s easier that there wasn’t a body to have to look at afterwards. It’s almost as though I imagined it.”
“Makes sense,” he responds. “Will you tell me if that changes?” He looks back over at me and raises an eyebrow. I sigh and nod my agreement.
“Good. Then let’s get back. Barley wants to retaliate this time, before they can send another group.”
18
Anza
Leaning against the hill’s sharp incline, I watch as Saeren finishes the last touches on her illustration. It shows a mother and father holding each other and sobbing as their daughter is dragged away by soldiers. It doesn’t quite depict my departure, I think to myself, imagining Marie taking me away willingly, but it was the norm.
“Perfect,” I tell her. “What should we write above it?” Her plan, as she’d described it to me, is for us to make fliers depicting our humanity and the atrocities we’ve faced that I can send Terra out to hang in towns at night. We need the public on our side.
She tucks her hair behind her ear and looks up. “We’re your family, not your enemy?” she suggests, then shrugs. “I’m your illustrator, not your slogan writer.” I roll my eyes and she shoves my shoulder with hers.
“Let’s go show the others,” I say and we walk towards the center of camp. Eli’s group sits together in the shade of the arch line, planning their next effort. They’ve successfully raided five armories across Trinity, posing as vanilla supporters. I’m unsure if Trinity believes the ruse, but citizens have started having conversations.
“Wouldn’t the people fight that?” Solar asks Eli. At first I was hesitant to let him stay on the team, especially after Barley mentioned it, but Eli insisted that he would be far better off going out and doing than sitting at camp bored.
So far, it’s been working. I sent Peony with Barley to give her space, but it has helped him too. I’m not sure if she was a physical reminder of his desire to die or his guilt but, without that around, he’s been able to let it pass.
“In some towns, sure. We would have to send some of Barley’s people out to get a feel of the towns ahead of time,” Eli responds.
“What are you thinking?” I ask, curious.
Eli looks up. “Now that we’re gaining public support, I think we could find the towns that are most on our side and take control of them. Originally I wanted to choose strategically, but Solar is right about support. Right now Trinity still thinks of us as captives in hiding; we need to show them that we’re serious.”
I nod, considering all the pieces. Peony would be really good at this, always considering all possible outcomes and creating plans. I hope she’s doing well up there…
“What did you need?” Eli asks, cutting into my thoughts.
“Saeren had the idea to illustrate posters that we could hang in towns to gain support,” I tell him, holding up her illustration. “We just need people to help her draw more and come up with slogans to add to them.”
Eli smiles. “I like it. If we could get these out soon with the spies, they could pay attention to how the towns r
espond to help us decide which to choose.”
“I’ll go work on more,” Saeren says, smiling back.
“If anybody wants to help, I’ll send them to you,” I tell her, then turn back to Eli. “I’ll keep you updated on them. What is your plan for keeping control of the towns once we have them?”
“I’m not sure yet. We need enough people to act as guards, but also to lead and communicate with the citizens.”
“I’ll get Barley’s opinion, too. She might be able to spare some of her people,” I tell him, turning away.
Looking out over the camp, I consider each person I see. Are they strong enough to hold off the Guardia? Can they communicate well enough to keep the citizens on our side when we make their towns a war zone? That’s a hard task for anyone, yet Eli wants us to take multiple towns.
—Are you able to talk?
Eliza. She hasn’t connected since she got upset with me and I haven’t reached out, either.
—Yes.
—Gray’s escuadra was sent to aid the border guard up by Lavon Lake, but he’s back now. He was attacked by a member of his team.
—Is he alright?
—Yes, but he’s refusing to be given a new assignment. Crow will have to give him the serum when he returns.
I’m going to have to tell Barley that he’s alive and find a way to get him out before that happens.
—Anza, do you have a group of our people up by that lake?
My forehead creases in confusion. I haven’t sent anyone out except for Eli’s team. Then in dawns on me: Barley is somewhere up north. Does Eliza mean Haven?
—No, but one of our alliances is up north. Why?
—The border station where Gray was assigned found and attacked a talist settlement. He wasn’t involved so he doesn’t know more and he was sent back before he learned the result. I wanted to make sure ours are safe.
—Thank you for telling me. I’ll reach out and find out. If they’re safe, I’ll see if they can help with Gray since they’re closer.
—Hurry. Crow should be back in about a week.
—Eliza? I think back on how our last conversation ended. I do appreciate you.
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