Confessions of a Thug

by Meadows Taylor

  CHAPTER XLVII.

  We strangled the merchants at the place we had fixed on, them andtheir bullock-drivers,--nine in all, and yet we were only seventeenThugs; but we were desperate. In our route we had travelled towardsJhalone, and I could no longer delay my project of proceeding thither,and making over my concealed treasure to the good Moola who had chargeof my child. Hoormut volunteered to accompany me; and desiring theremainder of the band to make the best of their way to Calpee, andthere to await our arrival, we pushed on to Jhalone.

  Considering the risk we ran, in approaching a place where inevitabledeath awaited _me_, should I be discovered, we did well to disguiseourselves as Gosaeens. We covered our bodies with ashes, matted thehair on our heads with mud, hung gourds at our waist, and in thismean and wretched disguise we entered the town--that spot where I hadpassed so many years of happiness, where my fairest prospects had beenblighted, and the resolutions I had formed of leading a new life andforsaking Thuggee, rendered alike impracticable and distasteful to me.My emotions on entering the town, and more than all on passing thehouse where I had resided, were overpowering; but I rallied my heart;I passed through the city, and my friend and myself took up our abodefor the day near a well outside the gates, which was not far from thespot where I had buried my treasure. We had selected the best disguisepossible for my purpose; we were visited during the day by someHindoos, who came, some out of curiosity, and a few to offer alms tous; my companion replied to their inquiries and declared me to be undera vow of silence, which satisfied them, and they departed, leaving usto prosecute our plans.

  As the evening approached, I strolled towards the trees under which wasdeposited the sum I had hoarded up to serve me at any time of need.It was a deserted burial-place, overgrown by custard-apple bushes andother brushwood, and the rank grass had sprung up from the frequentrain. My heart beat quick as I approached the spot; my hoard might havebeen discovered, and if it had been removed my child would be a beggar,dependent upon the charity of strangers; she might even be thrust intothe street, to herd with the vile and worthless, when the care of herbecame irksome or expensive to her present protectors. But anything,thought I, is better than that she should accompany me, where a lifeof hardship would be her portion, and where she could not escape thecontamination which scenes of guilt and murder would effect in a shorttime, and from which, alone as I was, I could not protect her.

  I reached the tomb in which, by removing a stone, I had placed thevessel containing the money. I hardly dared look at the well-rememberedspot, hardly dared attempt to remove the stone; but I did remove it,and, O joy of joys, there was my treasure undisturbed! I hastilyseized the earthen vessel, and crawled with it into the thickest ofthe underwood ere I ventured to open and examine it. I had forgottenwhat it contained, and the contents surpassed my expectations. I foundthirty ashruffees and four small bars of gold, a box containing twostrings of pearls of some value and some jewels, and tied up in arag were some loose stones of value, one of them a diamond of greatlustre and beauty. The jewels I determined to keep, as they might beafterwards of use to me, not only from their value, but to enable me toassume the character of a dealer in precious stones, which is always arespectable calling and for which, in the jewels before me, I had amplestock for trade. I replaced the vessel and its precious contents, whichcould not have been worth less than a thousand rupees; and I felt myheart lightened of a load, both at seeing my treasure safe, and at theassurance it gave me that by means of it my daughter would be decentlyprovided for. I returned to my companion, who had been anxiouslywatching my proceedings, and he too rejoiced at my good fortune.

  I did not proceed into the town till it was dusk: the gates, I knew,would be open until long after dark, and I went alone to avoid anychance of being remarked. I soon reached the house of the Moola, when,abandoning my character of a Gosaeen, I asked for alms in a lusty voicein the name of Moula Ali of Hyderabad. Fortunately the old Moola wassitting alone in his verandah; I saw him through the open gate, andadvanced rapidly, shutting it behind me. He was engaged in reading hisKoran, and was rocking himself to and fro, apparently absorbed in thebook before him, so that he did not observe my approach; nor was heaware of my presence till I had prostrated myself before him.

  "Punah i Khoda!" he exclaimed; "what is this, a Gosaeen? thou must bemad, good friend; or what seekest thou with the old Moola? Speak, thouhast almost frightened me, and disturbed my meditations on the holyvolume."

  "Pardon, Moolajee!" I cried; "you see one before you who has risked hislife to speak with you, and you must listen to me for a few moments. Iknow you well, though you do not recognise me in this disguise."

  "I know thee not, friend," he said; "nevertheless, if I can do aught toserve thee, speak; yet it is seldom that the Hindoo seeks the house ofthe priest of the Moslem faith; and I am in astonishment at thy garband address."

  "Moola!" I said, "I would fain speak with thee in absolute secrecy;are we secure from interruption here? Fear me not; I come with goodintent, and am not what you think me, but one of thine own faith;" andI repeated the Belief.

  "Strange, most strange is this," said the old man rising; "I doubt theenot: no one would do the old Moola harm; and so, as thou requirestsecrecy, I will but fasten the outer gate and join thee instantly." Hedid so, and returned.

  "Moola," said I, when he was once more seated, and was prying into myface with a look of mingled curiosity and wonder, "Moolajee! O WulleeMahomed! dost thou not recognise me?"

  "Thy voice is familiar to mine ears," said the old man, "yet I remembernot thy features. Who art thou?"

  "Mine is a name which may hardly be pronounced in Jhalone," I replied;"but we are alone. Have you forgotten Ameer Ali?"

  "Punah!" exclaimed the Moola, sidling away from me to the edge of hiscarpet; "Punah i Khoda! do I behold that bad and reckless man?"

  "Bad I may be, Moola," said I quietly; "and reckless I certainly am;yet I wish thee no harm. You were kind to one I loved--you have mychild in your house--it is of them I would speak, not of myself. Tellme, for the sake of Alla, whether my child is well--tell me whether shelives, and I will bless you." I gasped for breath while he replied,lest I should perchance have to hear of further misfortune.

  "This is madness, Ameer Ali," said he; "know you not that your father'sfate awaits you if you are discovered here?"

  "I know, I know all," said I; "and I have braved everything. I havesought you despite of danger--for my heart clove to my child, and Iwould fain hear of her. Ah, Moola, think not of what I was, and bemerciful to me."

  "Unhappy man!" he cried; "thy crimes brought with them their ownreward; but I will not speak of the past. Know then that thy daughteris well; but she grieves still for thee and for her mother, whom Allain mercy removed from her sufferings before she knew her degradation."

  "Shookr Khoda!" I exclaimed: "ah, Alla, thou art merciful even to me.And my child is well, and remembers me?"

  "She does, Meer Sahib; she often speaks of you, but we have told heryou are dead, and she no longer thinks of you as one whom she may evermeet again."

  "And you are right, Moola," said I; "you are wise in having done this.May Alla repay your kindness to a deserted child, for I cannot. I havesought you for a purpose which you must promise to agree to, evenbefore I speak it--it is the only request I shall ever make for mychild, and from henceforth you will never see my face again nor hear myname."

  "Speak," said the Moola; "I promise nothing, Ameer Ali; thou hastdeceived thousands, and the old Moola is no match for thee in deceit."

  "Briefly then," said I, "there was a small treasure which I buried in afield here long ago: I have returned and found it safe. It is a trifle,yet it is of no use to me; and I would give it over to you, both as aportion for my daughter when she is married, and as some provision forher until that can be effected."

  "The spoil of the murdered," said the old man, drawing himself upproudly, "can never enter the house of the Moola; it would bring acurse with it, and I will have none of it
. Keep it yourself, AmeerAli, and may Alla give you the grace to use it in regaining the honestreputation you have lost."

  "No, no," cried I; "the money was my wife's; she had hoarded it up forour child; she brought it with her from the Dukhun, and it has remainedas she placed it in the vessel. I swear to you that it is honest money;would I curse my child with the spoil of murders?"

  "Swear to me on the Koran that it is, and I will believe you, AmeerAli, but not else;" and he tendered me the holy book.

  I raised it to my lips; I kissed it, and touched my forehead and eyeswith it. I swore to what was false; but it was for my child. "Are yousatisfied now?" I asked; "now that you have humbled me by obliging meto swear?"

  "I am," he replied; "your trust shall be carefully and religiouslykept. Have you the money with you?"

  "No," said I; "but I will go and return with it instantly. Admit mealone; I will cough at your gate when I arrive."

  I hastened to the spot I have before described; I hastily seized mytreasure and returned to the Moola; he was waiting for me at the gateof his house, and we entered it together. "Here is all I have," said I,pouring out the contents of the vessel on the carpet; "it is not much,but it is the only portion of my wealth which remains to me."

  "Think not of the past, Meer Sahib, what happened was predestinated,and was the will of the All-powerful!"

  "I have indeed no alternative but to submit, good Moola. But my time isshort, and night advances; ere morning breaks, I must be far away fromthis, where my associates expect me. One favour I would beg,--it is, tosee my child: one look will be sufficient for my soul to dwell on inafter years, for I am assured that it will be the last--you will notdeny me?"

  "I will not, Meer Sahib; she is now at play with a neighbour's childin the zenana, and if you will follow me I will show her to you. Onelook must be sufficient for you; after that she is mine, and I will bea father to her. Follow me." I did; I followed him through a court-yardto the door of a second, which was the entrance to his zenana. I heardthe merry voices of the children, as they played with light and joyfulhearts, and I could distinguish the silvery tones of my preciouschild's voice, so like those of her mother, which were now silent forever.

  "We will not disturb them, Meer Sahib," said the Moola in a whisper, ashe pushed open the door gently; "look in, so that you may not be seen;you will easily distinguish your daughter."

  Yes, she was there, my child, my beautiful child! still delicate andfragile as she had ever been; but her face had a joyous expression,and she was as merry as those by whom she was surrounded. Long, longI gazed, and oh, my heart yearned to rush in, and for the last time toclasp her to my bosom and bless her. But I restrained myself; she wouldnot, could not have recognized me in the disguise I wore and I shouldhave only needlessly alarmed and terrified her. Yet I put up a ferventprayer to Alla for her protection and happiness, and I tore myself fromthe spot--dejected, yet satisfied that she still lived and was happy.

  "Enough!" said I to the Moola, when we regained the outer apartment; "Inow leave you; be kind to my child, and Alla will more than repay youfor aught of care or anxiety she may cause you. What I have given youwill be ample for a dowry to her in marriage with any person you mayselect--any one who may be ignorant of her father's shame."

  "I will: and rest assured that wherever you are, whatever your afterlot in life may be, you never need give one anxious thought aboutMeeran; for I again repeat it, I am now her parent, and she has alsofound another mother."

  "I believe you," said I; "and if ever I am again favoured by fortuneand in a situation to come to you without shame to her, you shall takeme to her and present a father to his child: until then you hear not ofme again."

  I left him. I had borne up against my feelings, I had struggledagainst and overcome them so long as I was with him; but as I passedhis threshold the fond love of a parent would not be stifled: I wasovercome by bitter grief, and I sat down and wept, for I felt that Ihad seen my child for the last time,--and it was even so; I have neverbeheld her since, Sahib, nor ever been able to get a clue to her fate.May Alla grant she is happy, and knows not of mine! But of this morehereafter.

  I wept! yes, I sat at the threshold of what had been my own home andwept, yet not aloud. My eyes were a fountain of tears, and they welledover their lids, and coursed down my rough visage, and fell hot uponmy hands. My memory was busy with the past, that period of bliss whenall earthly joy was my portion, and with it wealth and fame. Allwas gone--gone like the fleeting dream--a mockery, which, gorgeousor blissful as it may be while it possesses the sleeping senses, isbroken--even the remembrance of it lost--by awakening to reality. Allahelp me! I said, in the bitterness of my heart at that moment; I am,indeed, desolate, and it matters not what becomes of me: I have no hope.

  How long I thus sat I know not; but, arousing myself by a suddenthought of the danger I was in, I rose up, took one long, sad surveyof what was once my own, but which was now deserted; and hurrying awayfrom the spot, I reached the gate as it was about to be shut, and soonafterwards joined my companion.

  At length we reached Calpee, where we found the band and theirfamilies; and at a council of all assembled, after many plans ofproceeding had been discussed, and many plans proposed for our finalsettling-place by the different members, I opened to them one of myown, which I had long entertained. It was, to proceed to Lukhnow bya boat, which could be easily hired, and to remain there, as it wasa city which promised an ample harvest to a Thug; and, from the notover-strict character of its government, a more likely one than anyother to enable us to pursue our calling with security. The plan wasagreed on; and the next morning I betook myself to the Ghaut, to holdcommunication with the Manjees of the boats, and to strike a bargainfor their conveyance of my party.

  All was arranged to the satisfaction of my associates; and at the hourappointed, which had been declared a lucky moment by some astrologeremployed by the boatmen, the anchor was raised, and a fair wind carriedus rapidly over the smooth waters. Day after day passed in this manner,and there was a kind of dreamy pleasure about the voyage, which wasindescribably grateful to me. Here I had no alarms, no fatiguingjourneys, no anxiety; my mind became calm and unruffled, and I was oncemore at peace.

  At Lukhnow we lived for some time upon the proceeds of our last booty,and I established a small traffic in precious stones, upon those I hadbrought with me; but it yielded small returns to me, and I only delayedcommencing operations till I could fix upon some settled plans. I haderred deeply in leaving my own country; if I needs must have left it,I ought to have gone to the Dukhun: there I should have succeeded--Ishould have risen; for the Dukhun Thugs required leaders, and, as youmay have heard, whenever a Hindostan Jemadar led them, they behavedwell and became the terror of the country. Here, I was in a place ofwhich I was ignorant, and I dared not venture to take to the roads. Atlength I thought I would attempt the same system we had practised sosuccessfully at Hyderabad. No sooner had the idea possessed me, than Ilonged to put it into execution; the more so, as my associates receivedit with ardour, and seemed strongly convinced of its practicability.We were unknown in that crowded and vicious city, lived in an obscurepart, and could never be suspected in our daily perambulations throughthe bazars in search of bunij. And so it turned out; we were in greatluck for two months, money flowed in upon us, and we had killed upwardsof thirty persons, mostly travellers to distant parts, whom we decoyedfrom the serais; and as we succeeded, I had more money at my disposal,and was enabled to bribe several of the serai-keepers; and by allowingthem to participate to a large amount in our gains, I secured admissionto the serais, and had facilities of speaking with travellers, which Ishould never have enjoyed had I neglected to secure their goodwill. Butfortune was against me, despite of this cheering commencement, and wedid not long enjoy our easy and profitable career.

  We had one day taken out of the city a party of seven travellers,we being sixteen Thugs in number. I well remember it was a Friday,an unlucky day at best. Among the Thugs was an old m
an, one of theold Murnae stock, a capital Bhuttote, who had joined us a short timebefore; he had known my father, and me when a child, and had recognizedme in a street in Lukhnow, which led to his joining us. We had takenthe travellers to a favourite bhil of ours about four coss distant, andwere in the act of strangling them,--some even lay dead on the ground,and the rest were in their last agonies,--when by the merest chancea body of horse, which were on their way from the city to a distantpergunnah, came upon us. We had grown too confident from our frequentsuccesses,--it was still far from morning, and we had neglected toplace scouts. The horse came upon us unheard and unseen, and, as Ihave told you, caught us in the very act. Nine of us were seized aftera faint resistance; the rest--fortunate men!--made their escape. Ourhands were bound behind us, and we were dragged into the city, objectsof wonder and terror to the inhabitants. The bodies were brought inafter us; and two of the travellers who had been only half strangled,and were revived by the horsemen, gave so clear an account of our wholeproceedings, how we had inveigled them and accompanied them on theirmarch till we attacked them unawares, that no doubt remained of ourguilt; and after our brief trial had been concluded before the Kazee,we were cast into prison, to await our fate. The old Thug and myselfhad been bound together, and we were in this state thrust into one ofthe narrow cells of the jail. There we were told we should remain tillthe pleasure of the king was known regarding us.