by E. M. Moore
Ryan looks over at me warily. “Is everything okay with you this morning?”
“No,” I tell him.
We’re in the middle of the twisting roads that lead down to Rockport, but he doesn’t care. He pulls over to the side, the tires crunching the gravel that lines the road, and puts the brake on. “Okay, what’s going on?”
I rub my head and peek at him. “This is insane, but I think you guys need to step up for the Trials. Lake can’t do it on his own. Jesus. Lux will be scarred for life. Who the fuck knows what he’ll come up with?”
Ryan lays his head back against the seat and strokes the side of his face. “I was thinking the same thing, but I didn’t know how you were going to react. This isn’t for Lake, Tessa. Just keep telling yourself that. This is for the team. What happens to the team if he runs everything?”
I grind my teeth together. I’ve been having the same thoughts myself, but hearing Ryan repeat them back to me pisses me off. Why can’t Lake just go the fuck away? I wish Hayes would’ve broken one of his appendages when he fought with him after the one-on-one. He doesn’t deserve any of this.
But the team—and us, my Ballers, their dreams, my fucking dream—don’t deserve to fade away just because of one asshole either. That would be the biggest travesty in all this. Not that one jerk broke my wrist, but that I let him break me. All of me. I let one incident not only bring me down, but also those I plan on having in my life for a long time to come.
“So we understand one another then?” I ask Ryan. “This is for the team.”
He nods. I knew he would get it. I’m not sure if we’ll be able to convince Hayes, but we need to try. “Why don’t you text the guys and have them meet us in the parking lot?”
I pull my phone out. I’ve gotten a little better at texting with the limited finger mobility I have with my right hand, but eventually, I get the text out and press send. My heart is in my throat as we make our way to the school. I’m not sure what Sloan and Alec’s reaction will be, but I know Hayes isn’t going to take it well at all. He’s going to be furious.
Ryan pulls into his normal parking spot. As soon as he got a car, miraculously, a spot opened for him in the first row of parking. Students are trickling into the school, but two stride out the doors while Ryan and I sit there. We get out to meet Hayes and Alec, then Sloan pulls in next to Ryan. We’re all there now.
Ryan doesn’t waste any time telling them what we’ve decided. Ever the leader, he lays it out in black and white, noting our reasoning and then sits back and waits for their responses. Surprisingly enough, there isn’t much at first. However, I do feel a hard pair of eyes on me. I already know whose they are because of the ice-cold shiver that runs up my spine, and when I look over at Hayes, I can tell he’s furious just like I expected. “Look at your wrist,” he says, his voice casual.
I swallow. “I know about my wrist,” I tell him. My voice is soft. It feels weird arguing with him about the fact that I want them to be in the same vicinity as Lake even though I’m adamantly against it.
“Hayes,” Ryan starts.
“No,” Hayes says. “Don’t. This is fucking ridiculous. In case you guys haven’t noticed, there’s something bigger than basketball here. Something bigger than the future we had planned. I don’t know about the rest of you, but my future is standing right here, and that fucker hurt her. I’m not going to play fucking nice with him.”
I know Hayes has hang-ups about other things, but it’s almost impossible to remember them right now. He just called me his future. I walk over to him. He tries to look away from me. He tries to avoid me, but he can’t.
“Tessa,” he says as a warning. His voice is destitute, like he already knows he’s going to do what I ask, but he really doesn’t want to, and he doesn’t want me to make him either.
“Hayes,” Ryan says. “You need basketball as much as the rest of us. What about your goals?” he asks. “I’m not saying we even have to make nice with Lake. I’m just saying we have to be able to at least stand his presence. We have to be able to work together if we have a shot at Championships again. Just remember the better we play, the better scholarship opportunities we get. The better we are, maybe we’ll all get scholarships to State like we want. All we’re doing is not letting him dictate things. That’s it.”
“Don’t ask me to do this,” Hayes says, looking at me, his blue eyes wild.
My heart breaks. “I’m not going to ask you to then,” I tell him. He visibly relaxes. “I’m not asking you to be nice to him. Hell, I don’t care if you kick his ass every single fucking day, I’m just asking you to… well, I don’t know what I’m asking. Just be involved in Trials. We don’t want River skating through because you know Lake will let him. What about Lux, huh? He doesn’t deserve to be targeted. You know Lake won’t give a shit about anyone but his brother.”
“She’s right,” Sloan says. “He’s been waiting for River to have his chance. Don’t forget he plays the exact same position as Tessa and Lake. That means someone who was on the team last year isn’t making it if River makes it. We need to make sure Tessa gets her best shot regardless of the fact that her wrist is broken. You know everyone is going to be saying shit about that.”
“She didn’t play last year because of us,” Alec says, his voice low. “Coach can’t even say that she had a significant impact on the team last year and that’s why she’s going to make the team this year. If we can help at all…”
Hayes runs a hand through his thick hair. “This is fucked up,” he says. “What about Tessa while we’re off doing Trials with River and Lux? It’ll leave her wide open for bitches like Rhonda.”
“I might be able to help with that,” Alec says.
My heart catapults against my ribcage. He’s staring down at the concrete sidewalk at our feet. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.” He looks up, his green eyes determined. “I’m going to play Rock basketball this year, but it’s not going to be my main priority. I’m focusing on baseball. I’m going to have a talk with Coach later today. I’ll start if he wants me to, or he can move someone else up. I’ll give it my best, but I can’t keep circling between the two anymore, especially at the end of the season when it gets closer to regular season baseball. Baseball will be my focus.”
I nibble on my lip but smile for him. “That sounds like the ideal scenario,” I tell him.
He tracks his gaze over to me. The rest of the guys agree, albeit slowly. They move in, slapping Alec on the back, telling him they’re glad he’s going to be doing what he wants to do. Yes, it’s a bit of a blow to the team, but that means the rest of us need to step up, and that I need to get this fucking cast off my wrist, so I can start playing again.
“So, you’ll sit Trials out?” Ryan asks, looking up at him. There’s a slight tick to his jaw with the revelation of this information, but he has to be pleased. Alec could’ve said screw basketball all together.
“Yes. I know my baseball games aren’t the actual season, but scouts have been taking the opportunity to watch me play. The guy from State was even there the other day.”
“Seriously? Why didn’t you say something?” I ask. It had to be one of those guys Ryan pointed out in the stands the other day.
He shrugs. “I didn’t know what you guys all thought about it. I know I’m letting you down.”
“Dude,” Ryan says, his voice hard. “You’re not letting anyone down. Letting us down would’ve been staying quiet and not telling us what you really want. Personally, I’m pulling for State, but no matter what, no matter if we all end up going to different schools, we’ll still be there for each other. Nothing’s going to change that.”
A moment passes between the guys. Slowly, a smile forms on my lips because it isn’t just a moment between the four of them. I’m included, too.
I need to have a major talk with my dad about State. If they’re going there, it’s a win-win scenario. State basketball is like Rock basketball. They’re topnotch. I could go outside the state i
f I wanted to play for another good team, but State’s our state’s team, you know? It’s the dream, and I might just be able to share it with these guys.
Together, we walk into the school. My heart feels so much lighter after having talked with them about what’s going on. Hayes still feels a little stiff, but I think he’ll come around. I slide my hand into his and squeeze, just to let him know I’m with him every step of the way.
20
Dawn and I get ready for the homecoming dance at my house. She goes through my closet, staring wide-eyed at all my dresses. I tell her it’s because we’re invited to a lot of fancy functions, but she doesn’t care, she’s just amazed. She’s brought a dress with her to wear, but when she was looking through my closet, she found one she loved, so I told her to go for it.
After trying it on, she stares at herself in the mirror. “Damn. Your closet is better than a store.” She twists this way and that, admiring her profile in the reflection.
“It looks really good on you,” I tell her, commenting on the royal blue dress with just a slight low cut that shows the top of her cleavage. “I bet David will like it.”
Dawn smiles at that. “I hope so. Don’t get me wrong, it’s like super hot that he plays football and everything, but he’s freaking obsessed during football season.” She rolls her eyes.
I try to hold back the laughter. “Homecoming is kind of a big deal for football players.”
She holds her hand up. “Trust me, I don’t want to talk about it. I’ve heard enough about the freaking homecoming game.”
“Well, tomorrow should be fun,” I tell her. There’s the parade around the town, and I won’t have to pull the Ballers freaking parade float this time, and then there’s the game itself.
“Can you at least sit with me this year?” she asks, turning around, her hands on her hips.
“Well, yeah,” I tell her as if there was ever any doubt.
She tilts her head to the side. “Yeah, now that you have the majority of the Ballers eating out of the palm of your hands, you mean? The freaking sexual tension around you guys is crazy. If I were you, I’d abandon school and just lie in bed with one of them, or all of them, all day.”
“Oh my God,” I say, turning away because my face is about a million shades of red right now.
“Oh don’t be coy now,” she says. She taps her chin teasingly. “I wonder if you’ll give it up to Hayes or Alec tonight…”
“Dawn, Jesus. I’m not going to plan it out.”
“Or have a fucking orgy. Holy shit, if you have an orgy, I need details. I swear if something like that ever happens and you don’t give me a play-by-play, we’re done. I don’t care if you ever do become a NWBA superstar, this will be what defines our relationship.”
“WNBA…” I say.
“Seriously? I just said all that, and that’s what you correct?”
I shrug. “Well, it’s important.”
“What’s important is being in the middle of two or three of the hottest fucking guys in the whole fucking school. Damn. I’m so happy I asked you to sit with me that first day. Have I told you that before?”
I shake my head and slip inside the bathroom to change. I’m just about to zip my dress up when Dawn squeals, then there’s an even shorter scream of terror. I yank the bathroom door open. “What th—?”
In front of me, Ryan is dressed in a fine button-up with a pair of gray slacks. He’s got Dawn in front of him, his hand over her mouth. I burst out laughing, then have to rein myself in. “Dawn, it’s Ryan. Chill.”
Her once wide eyes almost roll in the back of her head with relief.
“Are you going to scream again?” Ryan asks.
She shakes her head.
He immediately lets her go.
She whips around to stare at him. “Christ, Ryan. You scared the fuck out of me,” she whisper yells. “What are you doing in here? Wait, is this how you guys get it on? You sneak in here in the middle of the night? Tessa, you are holding out on me. Bitch.”
My mouth just hangs wide open. I have no retort to what she’s said. Ryan ignores her. He moves past her, his eyes on me before cupping my cheek. “You look beautiful.”
It’s then that I remember I never got around to zipping my dress. I try to close it in the back, but Ryan moves around me. His fingertips graze my bare skin. A shiver skirts its way up my back and over my collarbone. Dawn looks away, so Ryan takes his time. His fingers skate up the sides of my body under the dress, then follow the straight line of my spine until he reaches the zipper. Slowly, he pulls it up, following his fingers as they trace an imaginary line up the middle of my back and into my neck. By the time he’s done, my knees feel like putty.
I swallow. “Thank you.”
“Any time.”
“Jesus, I’m turned on,” Dawn says.
I grab a pair of socks that are just sitting on my dresser and hurl them at her while I laugh. She reminds me so much of Sloan, to be honest. They’d probably be great friends.
“I was just coming to see how you were doing,” Ryan says. “I’ll go home now and come back with the Jeep.”
He turns to leave back through the window, but I grab his hand. “Actually, Dad wants to see me off, too, so after Mom takes some pictures of Dawn and me, we’ll walk up there.”
He nods and then ducks under the window to leave. Dawn watches him scale down the house. “How can your parents not tell how enamored you are with one another? It’s so fucking obvious.”
“Well, first of all, he’s usually not helping me put a dress on in front of them.”
Dawn flops back onto the bed. “God, he’s probably fucking amazing in bed.”
I smile, but I don’t bite. I’m not gossiping about my sex life with her. I want to keep those moments to myself.
Ten minutes later, Dawn and I make it downstairs. Mom takes pictures of us in front of the living room wall, and then she has Dawn take several of me and her. My mom’s also dressed up tonight for another date with Ron, so it’s the perfect time to have a nice picture of just the two of us. I tell her I’ll see her later, and then Dawn and I leave to walk up the hill to my dad’s house. It’s not that long of a walk at all, so we’re there in no time. I push the door open as soon as we get there, sending a caution look to Dawn as she follows me in, telling her with my eyes that she better not make any comments about me and Ryan or me and my Ballers either.
Ryan’s mom oohs and ahhs over us, saying somewhat misty-eyed that she always wanted a girl. Uncertainty skims through me. Dawn plays the photographer after Leslie thinks of every pose imaginable between the four of us, including placing Ryan and I together alone. We step forward at the same time to take our places. It’s so easy to touch and be around him when it’s just the two of us, but right now, it feels awkward as we try to pose in a way that’s acceptable to everyone. At first, we’re just standing side-by-side, but then Leslie says, “Put your arm around her, Ryan.”
Dawn is loving every fucking moment of this. She’s passed the camera off to Leslie, so she’s cracking up to the side without having to worry that she’s screwing the picture up.
Ryan slides his arm around me. We’re stiff at first, but the connection feels too good. I lean into him and his fingers close over my upper arm as we pose for the picture. The light flashes in our eyes while I’m pasting a smile on my face, trying not to internally combust in front of my dad. When Leslie finally stops clicking the shutter button on her phone, Ryan and I step apart. He trails his fingers over my back, making goosebumps sprout over goosebumps. Our gazes collide as we move away. There are other people in the room, but in that moment, there’s just the two of us… until I walk right into Dawn. “Shit, sorry,” I say.
The corners of her mouth tease up. “No problem. You were distracted.”
I send her a warning glare even though there’s no way she said it loud enough for anyone but me to hear.
“We should probably leave,” she says.
Absolutely. I need to get ou
t of this place with all the watchful eyes. I also feel like I need an icepack for my face to calm my heated cheeks.
Dad and Leslie see us off at the door. Dawn gets in the back of the Jeep while I take my usual place in the front. Ryan and Dad put the top and the sides of the car back on the other day, so we’re not exposed to the elements anymore as we make our way to the school. Dawn chatters on behind us about anything and everything, but my focus is on Ryan’s hand on my leg. It’s almost haphazardly placed there, but his thumb moves in circles over my thighs, driving me crazy. It feels like I’m on a date with him, with Ryan fucking Linc. Something I’ve always wanted. Yes, I know we’ve had sex before and done other things, but there’s something to be said for just this. For just his hand on my leg and driving me to a school dance like any other normal couple would do.
By the time we pull into the parking lot, I’m giddy with excitement.
David kicks off the side of the building and moves toward the Jeep. Before I can even open my door, Ryan’s already out and around to my side of the car, pulling the door open. I glance up at him. “Ryan Linc opens doors?”
“He does for you.”
The full intensity of his gray eyes is on me, making me wobble in the small heels I’m wearing as he pulls me to my feet. When the door closes behind me, he nuzzles my neck. “We’re going to have to say something to our parents soon because I can’t keep my hands off you, Tessa.”
The growl in his words sends a flurry of heat between my legs. “Y-yeah. Sure.”
He chuckles under his breath. “Although, it is kind of fun sneaking around…”
“They probably won’t leave us alone unattended if we tell them,” I agree, though I’m not even sure what I’m agreeing to at this point.
“Mmm, true. How often does your dad go away for marketing trips anyway?”
“Not often enough.”
His lips are barely grazing my neck. I lift my chin to allow him better access, and I swear he’s two seconds away from sliding his tongue over my skin when someone clears their throat behind us. Ryan drops his head. “Whoever you are, fuck you.”