STEP 3 Complete the massage by turning your lover onto their back and stroking and swirling your fingertips on the front of their body. After a while, linger on your lover’s genitals and nipples. Tease by taking your fingers away and then bringing them back again. When you sense your lover is buzzing with sensations, lean forward to kiss them. Then, see what happens next.
THE TRIPOD
To give him a complete “chakra experience” (see pages 26–7), make love in The Tripod position. She starts by kneeling at his feet and taking his lingam into her mouth while massaging his perineum – the site of his root chakra (see page 27). He closes his eyes and concentrates on the build up of tingling sexual energy in this spot. Then, when she’s ready, she moves slowly up his body kissing his belly and chest as she goes.
Depending on how close in height you are, she may need to stay still so that he doesn’t slip out. If so, enjoy the intense feeling of static union – flex your love muscles (see pages 124–5) against each other.
WOMEN Once you’ve worked your way up his body, share a deep, intoxicating, mouth-to-mouth kiss with him before twining your leg around his and guiding him into you.
MEN Imagine she’s drawing sexual sensations up through your body in a line.
PIERCING POSITION
She erotically inches her way up his body until her legs are hooked over his shoulders to get into this passionate and intense position. The challenge in Tantric terms is to harness your sexual energy and give each other a lingering erotic treat. Make the intensity smoulder and burn for as long as you can.
MEN Don’t shrink from your dominant role – enjoy it. Relish your potency and power. Express yourself vocally by moaning, growling or panting. Try to keep your buttocks relaxed as you move – it’s common for men to clench their buttocks when they’re on top, with the result that sexual tension and momentum builds up quickly leading to an explosive ejaculation. You can reverse this and enjoy slower and more sensual Tantric-style love-making by consciously relaxing.
SHIVA ON TOP
When you’re in this position, concentrate on the glorious sensuality of skin-on-skin contact. Tantric techniques can breathe new life into the missionary position and make it magical again. As he moves, picture the tight fit between your genitals, the alignment of your hearts and the way your lips melt together. As well as the potential to gaze into each other’s eyes and kiss in this position, you can experience an even greater sense of connection and oneness by making a seal between your lips and breathing each other’s breath.
share tender melting kisses
MEN Take charge – give yourself up to sensations of strong and fiery dominance. Slide in and out of your lover so that she can feel the full length of your shaft caressing her.
WOMEN Let your body open up to his like a flower – feel yourself letting go and surrendering beneath him.
SCISSORS
There is so much opportunity to touch and caress in this side-by-side position. It has lots of face-to-face intimacy and – unlike other side-by-side positions – he enters her deeply. The fact that he’s firmly nestled between her thighs means you’ll fit together tightly with little chance of him slipping out.
If you’d like to try the pelvic rocking technique (see pages 114–5) during sex, this is the perfect position. Pelvic rocking generates a sexual charge in your genitals that feels fantastic for both of you. Get into a rhythm of moving back and forth at the same time (just your pelvis – the rest of your body should stay still). As you both rock back, his penis withdraws a little. As you rock forward, it slides back, stimulating her clitoris and his glans on the way.
Although it can be tempting to speed up the rocking movements as you get more aroused, try to keep the pace steady and rhythmic. Stay relaxed and allow pleasure to flow through your whole body – imagine your body opening up to sexual currents from your genitals all the way to the top of your head. If you want to, try synchronizing your breath and love-muscle contractions with your pelvic rocks.
feel the erotic current
yoni CARESS
Let your lover drift off on waves of sensual ecstasy as you give her this Tantric yoni massage. Meanwhile, you can experience the intense arousal that comes from freely giving pleasure.
Begin with a short Tantric ritual: place one hand on her yoni and one hand on her heart. Let your hands rest there for a couple of minutes. The continued gentle pressure of your palms will give her a delicious sense of awareness of these two parts of her body. Breathe into your heart chakra (see page 27) and ask your lover to do the same. Feel a sense of love expanding in your chest.
Slowly begin to explore her yoni with your fingertips. Don’t rush to stimulate her clitoris or vagina – as always in Tantric sex, the aim is to explore and arouse rather than get to a quick erotic peak. Use your fingers creatively. For example, stroke, tickle, tug and pinch her labia; press her U-spot (the sensitive area around her urethral opening); make detours to stroke her inner thighs or her pubic mound; draw oval shapes with your finger around her clitoris at one end and her perineum at the other end.
touch TECHNIQUES
• Move your fingertip incredibly slowly around her entire yoni (pause at her vaginal entrance to pick up her natural moisture and spread it around).
• Touch her with a sense of loving reverence. Let yourself be completely and utterly absorbed in exploration.
• Wait until your lover is very aroused before you touch her clitoris, then tease it gently with the tip of your finger.
• Try different types of touch: slide your fingers in circles around her clitoral hood, tickle the clitoral head with your fingertip or clamp her clitoris between your forefinger and middle finger, and then wiggle your fingers against one another.
CLOSE UNION
In Tantric sex you take time to experiment – the smallest change to a position can have wonderful effects. Close Union is similar to Feminine Essence (see pages 82–3), but instead of having her legs on the outside of his, they’re tucked inside.
This small difference can greatly enhance sensation as it increases the pressure on her clitoris and makes him feel more tightly gripped. It can also make orgasm more likely for her – some women find it easier to come with their legs together.
WOMEN Try shaking your pelvis in this position. Imagine that you’re shaking his lingam inside you. This provides both of you with fast vibrations that feel fantastic and also frees up your pelvis and gets energy moving along your chakras (see pages 26–7). It’s especially good for opening your sacral chakra.
MEN Focus on the glorious sensations rippling through your lingam. Relax completely as your lover shakes and trembles on top of you.
THE CLASP
You both lie side by side in an intimate embrace, and have a wonderful opportunity to silently appreciate and caress each other.
Gaze into each other’s eyes and stroke each other. Let your tender side emerge. Focus on the sensation of your breath mingling, and the sensations of your naked body being held and stroked.
Feel arousal ripple through you – let it spread from your genitals. If your mind starts to wander, try the chakra breathing exercise on pages 110–11 – this will still your thoughts and bring you home to your body. Imagine that you’re melting together as you make love – become totally at one with each other.
RISING SERPENT
You can enjoy a real closeness and skin-to-skin touch in this seductive position even though you aren’t facing each other.
She feels closely covered without being crushed; he has the freedom to move freely. Her goddess spot (see pages 90–91) is massaged, as is the length of his penis. You can make penetration easier – and deeper – by putting pillows under her abdomen.
Focus on synchronizing your breath and then breathing up through your chakras together (see pages 110–11). Give your love muscles a good workout too – it’s a great way to communicate with each other.
If the temptation to thrust to a speedy climax is too gre
at, get into a restful side-by-side position simply by rolling over.
whisper softly
lingam CARESS
Men love this Tantric lingam massage. Instead of the quick up-and-down strokes he’d normally use during masturbation, you’re going to slow things down Tantric style, and tease, caress and explore the whole of his genital area.
When he’s lying comfortably on his back, gently place one hand on his lingam and the other on his heart. This connects the two of you. Oil your hands, then position his lingam so it points towards his head. Use a long, firm hand-over-hand technique to stroke it and draw the tip of his lingam up towards his navel (include his balls).
After a minute or so, change the tempo of the massage from firm and grounding to something more erotic by reducing the pressure of your hands. Keep reducing the pressure until your strokes are featherlight and teasing.
Imagine loving energy flowing from your heart into your fingertips and manifesting itself in caresses. Intuit how your lover’s body wants to be touched. Use your oiled fingers to explore every bit of his lingam – the glans, the under-side of his shaft, the base where his lingam joins his body. Let yourself get carried away. Add your lips and tongue as massage tools if you feel like it. Try any or all of these strokes:
touch TECHNIQUES
• Flutter your fingertips in soft barely-there movements over his entire genital area.
• Interlink your oiled fingers around your lover’s shaft so that your thumbs are aligned on the underside of his lingam. Now he’s completely enclosed in your hands, move them slowly up and down. Press the pads of your thumbs against his frenulum, near the end of his lingam, as they pass this sensitive spot.
• Move your fingertips in small circular strokes on every part of his perineum. As you press his P-spot (see pages 86–7), ask him to contract his love muscles (see pages 124–5) and breathe in. Release the pressure, asking him to relax and breathe out.
• Press the shaft of his lingam between your flat palms and then rub them slowly together.
FEMININE ESSENCE
He fully surrenders to her and she explores her complete capacity for pleasure in this powerful woman-on-top position. As she flicks and undulates her hips, her vagina is stimulated by his penis and her clitoris is massaged by his whole pubic area and the base of his shaft. She can hone her sensitivity by switching her awareness back and forth between her clitoris and her vagina.
WOMEN Take time to focus on the different sensations that are coming from your clitoris and vagina. Feel them building up gradually – don’t try to force anything – just relax and let it happen. One of the many joys of Tantric sex is that you’re under no pressure to come quickly, or at all, so just witness and savour every sensation.
MEN Because your lover is making all the moves in this position, there’s nothing for you to do but lie back. Watch what happens to your body as you relax into sex – you may feel intensely eroticized or you may feel you’re losing arousal. Your body may jerk, tremble or convulse with pleasure or it may be still and relaxed. Observe and enjoy all your responses.
relax and let go
STAR POSITION
This sexy position unites you and your lover in a novel way. He lies on his back and she guides his penis into her as she straddles him in a deep squat. From here she leans back until she’s lying with her head between his feet. You both open your legs and grasp each other’s feet. As you sink into a deep relaxation, breathe into the sexual charge that’s in your genitals. Breathe it up into your body so that you can feel ripples of energy coursing through you.
It’s also a great position to lie in after you’ve done a Tantric breathing exercise. (Her bottom rests on the floor between his legs rather than being raised on his abdomen.) Your bodies make the shape of a circle, and energy can circulate easily through your open chakras (see pages 26–7).
feel the body heat
THE SACRED spot
Giving him this sacred spot Tantric massage can take him to new heights of pleasure. Referred to as the sacred spot in Tantra, it’s also known as the prostate gland spot (or the P-spot), or simply the male G-spot. The prostate gland sits just underneath the bladder and surrounds the urethra.
Because the sacred spot is hidden inside his body, you can’t touch it directly, but you can stimulate it internally or externally. Make sure that your fingernails are short, and that your hands are clean and slippery with massage oil or lubricant before you explore your lover’s sacred spot.
STEP 1 Start by stroking your lover’s penis and balls, then slide your fingers back to his perineum. Explore the whole area, applying fingertip pressure as you go. Ask your lover to tell you when your fingers hit a pleasure spot – about midway between his balls and anus – then zone in on this area, pressing firmly upward with the tips of your index and middle fingers.
STEP 2 Stroke his penis (or ask him to masturbate) as you press his sacred spot. This combination should lead to an intense orgasm.
internal PLEASURE
This is the more intimate, direct option and it creates more intense sensations. Because it involves getting closely acquainted with his anus and rectum, you both need to be comfortable with this.
STEP 1 Gently insert your lubricated middle finger into his anus and let it rest there as he consciously relaxes his muscles – ask him to breathe deeply into his perineum and genitals.
STEP 2 When he’s ready, slide your finger in more deeply, then crook your finger and explore the front wall of his rectum. Feel around for an area that’s raised or different in texture to the surrounding tissue.
STEP 3 When you’ve found the right spot, press it firmly with your fingertip, or try pulsating pressure or rubbing. Ask him which kind of touch is most arousing. Combine this with penis stroking to give him an explosive orgasm.
SPOONING EMBRACE
You can relax and explore sexual sensation in a slow and leisurely way in the Spooning Embrace. Although it’s easy for him to thrust quickly from behind, experiment with slower, gentler movements. Try staying still and flexing your love muscles (see pages 124–5) against each other.
Take turns to rock your pelvis back and forth, then try simultaneous slow rocking. Even if you crave hard and fast genital stimulation, stay with the gentle mood and see where it takes you. If you’re feeling extremely aroused and close to orgasm, try this Tantric technique to help you last longer: focus on a part of your body you wouldn’t normally consider sexual, such as your belly or your throat. See if you can move the arousal from your genitals to this place. If you can, see if you can move it on further to a second destination.
rock against each other
THE GODDESS spot
This Tantric massage can help her unlock the pleasure-yielding qualities of her goddess spot (known outside Tantra as the G-spot). Your touch may also lead to implosive, whole-body orgasms.
STEP 1 Ask her to lie down, then put a cushion or a pillow under her bottom to raise her pelvis so you can access her goddess spot easily and precisely. Start by giving her a yoni caress (see pages 74–5). Once she’s aroused, slip one or two fingers into her vagina so that your fingertips are touching the front wall (on the side of her belly button). Bend your fingers a little as though you are beckoning someone towards you.
STEP 2 Carefully explore the front wall of her vagina: feel your way to a spot that feels different from its surroundings. It may feel raised or ridged and be roughly circular or oval in shape. This is the goddess spot.
STEP 3 Press gently on the goddess spot with your fingertips. Increase the pressure slowly using feedback from your lover as a guide to what feels good. She may feel uncomfortable or have the urge to urinate, but it should be possible to work through this and discover the deeply erotic sensations that lie beyond. Encourage her to focus on her breathing.
STEP 4 Experiment with different types of touch, such as deep static pressure, circling or stroking. Be aware of her response to each technique to discover what she enjoys most. Th
en, combine your strokes with clitoral caresses. If it’s difficult to get your hands at the right angle, ask her to pleasure herself while you concentrate on her goddess spot.
Receive G-SPOT pleasure
Becoming receptive to goddess-spot stimulation is something that can take practice. If you’re not familiar with it, don’t expect this type of massage to yield the same immediately pleasurable sensations as clitoral touch. It can take time to integrate goddess-spot sensations into your erotic experience and to abandon yourself to deep pleasure.
Lingam meets goddess
If you’ve discovered her goddess spot with your hands, you should be able to locate it with your penis during lovemaking. Aim your lingam towards the front wall of her vagina and stay in the shallow end. The contact won’t be as precise as when you use your fingers, but she’s got the emotional satisfaction of being penetrated by you.
GLORIOUS GODDESS
Although the fact that she is bent over in this erotic position invites high-intensity thrusting from him, try exploring stillness too. From his dominant position, he can enjoy the beauty of her body and of caressing her. This position is a perfect way to abandon yourself to feelings of dominance and vulnerability – explore the Tantric aim of discovering your masculine and feminine erotic selves. She bends over from the waist and rests her hands on the floor as he enters her. If this is difficult, she can modify the position by putting her hands on the edge of a bed or other piece of nearby furniture.
Pocket Tantric Super Sex Page 3