by E. L. Todd
“I don’t want to drag her down.”
“Arsen, she already is dragged down. Just talk to her.”
“I’m a piece of shit who killed my mother. Maybe I don’t want to talk about that.”
“You didn’t kill her, Arsen. She smoked, which led to lung cancer. That had nothing to do with you.”
“But I could have saved her. If I’d just forgiven her, I could have gotten her treatment.”
“Again, it was her decision not to ask for healthcare. That’s not your fault.”
“She preferred to die than to ever make me think she wanted something from me.” I held his gaze and felt the fire inside me burn. “The very last thing she did before she died was to protect me. And I treated her like shit and told her she could die and I wouldn’t care. Do you have any idea how I feel?”
“Yes, I do,” he said firmly.
“No, you don’t,” I snapped. “I know you had a hard life growing up but this is different. Blood is on my hands. I apologized to her but that isn’t enough. Abby never got to know her grandmother. I didn’t even get a chance to know my own mother. This isn’t just going to go away. It’s done.”
“Then leave it in the past, Arsen.”
“It’s not so simple.”
“What happened is traumatic for anyone, Arsen. I’m not saying you aren’t entitled to your grief and your pain. But pushing Silke away isn’t the answer.”
I rested my fingertips on my lips but didn’t look at him.
“You’ve made so much progress. Don’t revert back.”
The straw finally broke the camel’s back. This was one burden too many. I’d always suspected I wasn’t good enough for Silke and now I knew it was true. I killed my own family and I’d been pretending to be a member of Silke’s. It was fucked up in so many ways.
“You can push everyone else away but you can never push me away. So don’t bother trying.” He rose from the chair. “I’m your father.” He headed to the door.
“You aren’t my father.” I don’t know what possessed me to say that but it came out harsh. I still didn’t make eye contact with him so I didn’t know how he reacted.
He paused at the door. “A son will always deny his father. But a father will never deny his son.”
Chapter Five
Slade
We checked into the bed and breakfast then entered our room.
“Let the sex-a-thon begin.” I set our bags by the door then walked to the window. The curtains blocked our view so I opened them wide and let the sunlight in. It was much cooler up here, and fall felt like winter. A scenic view of the trails and the mountains was right outside our window.
“It’s beautiful.” Trinity stood beside me and looked into the trees.
“If we see a deer, we should have sex in front of it.”
She cocked an eyebrow and turned to me. “Why?”
I shrugged. “It’s like someone is watching us.”
“Do you want someone to watch us?”
“I don’t mind if someone watches me. You, on the other hand, I do mind.”
“But a deer is okay?”
“Baby, you know I’m kinky. Lay off.”
She felt the bedding in her fingertips then explored the bathroom and living room. “It’s cozy.”
“I wish I brought my guitar.”
“You need a break. Your fingers are calloused.”
“They’ll be calloused regardless.” I opened my bag and pulled a small piece of fabric out. “I got you something else…”
“You mean you got yourself something.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
I handed her the lingerie I bought online. “It’s black. I like it when you wear black.”
“We just got here. Want to go hiking or something?”
“No.” I pushed the lingerie further into her chest. “I did a very romantic thing for you this weekend. Now you should show how much you appreciate it.”
“Well, I bought you a very expensive guitar so you should show me how much you appreciate it.”
“How about we do that at the same time?”
She felt the dress in her fingertips. “I guess we could.”
I smacked her ass. “Now put that baby doll on.”
“I’ll get on that.” She walked into the bathroom.
I lay on the bed and put my hands behind my head. This was going to be a great vacation. I was the best husband ever for coming up with this idea.
When Trinity walked out of the bathroom she looked sexy as hell in the material.
My dick hardened. “Come to papa.”
***
We had a lot of sex that weekend. When we were both satisfied temporarily, we hit the trails and examined the wildlife. We found a brochure that listed all the different kinds of birds so we tried to find them in the wild. In the evening, we had dinner at the restaurant they had at the hotel. Then we returned to the room.
It was nice to be with her without any distractions. Friends usually got in the way of our alone time, or the drama with Cayson and Skye. Trinity had a lot of work to do, even from home. Now that we were here all we did was spend time together.
When we woke up on Sunday morning, my face nuzzled into her neck, I ran my hands all over her perfect body. It was cold outside so we stayed underneath the blankets.
Her skin was smooth under my touch. When my hand found her ass I gave it a playful squeeze. My wife was the sexiest woman I’d ever been with. I always knew if I settled down with a woman she would have to be a perfect ten. And she definitely was. But she was so much more than that. She was beautiful on the inside, with a heart full of gold. She was funny and playful, and she was so damn smart. I’d been stupidly happy since she became mine. I never grew tired of her, like bread that went stale after being left out for too long. When I made love to her my thoughts never drifted as they did with other girls. Our hearts and minds were always connected in an unbreakable way.
She was the one.
Here I was in the mountains spending my first year anniversary with Trinity, the woman I promised myself to. She was the person I spent all my time with and never got tired of. It was a future I never expected for myself but I was so grateful it happened.
I loved her so damn much.
I couldn’t even imagine my life without her. I didn’t miss being single at all. It was empty and painful. This deep and profound relationship was so much better. We were having some problems in terms of having children but it was nothing we couldn’t get through—together.
Trinity was trying to stay asleep because she kept sighing and trying not to move.
My lips found her neck and I kissed her while my hand groped her tits. Then it moved down her stomach and to the area between her legs. I found her nub and rubbed it aggressively while I continued to kiss her neck.
She moaned and moved against me slightly.
“Baby, wake up.”
“I’m tired…”
I rolled her to her back then moved on top of her. I dove under the sheets then pressed my face to the area between her legs. She loved it when I went down on her. She never actually told me, but the way she gripped my skull and fingered my hair while she moaned incoherently made it pretty clear.
She responded in the same way now. She arched her back and started to writhe on the bed.
I lay on my stomach and felt my dick grow hard underneath me. Pleasing a woman was never on my roster. I just did what I wanted and they usually came. But with Trinity I always did my best to make sure she was satisfied. I wanted her to enjoy me as much as I enjoyed her. Plus, if she got everything she needed from me there was no possibility she would ever look for it somewhere else. An invisible rope tethered her to me.
“Slade…” She suddenly held her breath and tensed. A moan came from deep in her throat then burst out loudly while she rode her climax. I kept my tongue pressed to her clit as I drove her home, making her feel an amazing orgasm. She writhed on the bed and widened her legs as she enjoyed it al
l the way to the very end.
When she was finished, I crawled up her body and positioned myself on top of her. “Still tired?”
She rested her head on the pillow and her hair scattered around her like seaweed. Her arms moved to my biceps and she gripped them aggressively. “No.”
I tilted her hips then leaned over her as I inserted myself. She was slick from her own fluids and my saliva. But she constricted my dick like a boa constrictor. I looked into her eyes as I rocked into her. Eye contact wasn’t something I usually did during sex. I only did it with her.
“Thank you for loving me the way you do…”
Her words halted me in mid-thrust. I stared at her and replayed those words in my mind.
“You make me feel like a princess.”
The emotion in her voice reached my ears. I leaned down and rubbed my nose against hers, feeling the distant thud in my heart. All I ever wanted was to make her happy, to make her feel special in a way no other girl could ever possibly understand. The fact I accomplished that made me feel like a better man. “And you make me feel like a king.”
***
When we returned home I was bummed. I wanted to say at that bed and breakfast forever. Just being with my wife in the middle of nowhere was nice. We celebrated our love for each other without any distractions. And I made love to her more than I usually did. My dick was very happy.
“Back to the real world, huh?” she asked.
“Yeah…”
“At least you can play your guitar now.”
“I guess…”
She caught my sadness. “We’ll take more trips like that from now on.”
“Or…you could sell your company.”
She sat beside me on the couch, looking confused.
“You know, so we could retire. I’d bet you’d make a lot of money if you sold it.”
“But…I love my job.”
I was afraid of that.
“Besides, when we have kids I’ll cut my hours back. I want to be home when they are around. So, I’ll be around more often then.”
“But what about me?”
“I’ll make more time for you too.”
“Okay.” I rubbed my nose against hers. “It’s better than nothing.”
“So…how’s your plan with Rhett going?”
“I haven’t thought about it at all.”
“Well, we’re back to the real world so you should start thinking about it.”
“Cayson met him once. It didn’t seem like he had a problem with him.”
“Then you need to move forward with your plan.”
“What’s the rush?” My hand moved to her thigh.
“Because I’m so madly in love with you and treasure every moment. And if I lost you, every moment would feel like an eternity. Skye is struggling just to breathe right now. We need to get them back together.”
“You’re right.” I needed to stop living in wonderland. Cayson and Skye needed to be put back together—as soon as possible.
Chapter Six
Skye
“I don’t know about this…”
“We all have mutual friends so you should be there. You can’t avoid each other forever.” Slade eyed my belly. “You have a baby in there, remember?”
I nodded.
“Don’t ask him about your relationship or make it seem like you’ll bring it up. Just steer clear of it.”
“Okay…”
Slade sat beside me with Trinity on his other side. We were in their apartment facing the TV. A football game was on and everyone was about to come over. “Rhett is coming too. So, this is the first stage of the plan.”
“I’m a terrible actress…”
“You don’t have to act. Rhett will do everything for you.”
Trinity looked at me. “You can do this, Skye. Just be calm.”
One by one, everyone started to come over. Conrad was there, and when Roland walked through the door he immediately ignored him. There was obviously beef between them. Ward and Clementine came over with Ward Jr. They laid a blanket on the floor and allowed him to crawl around. Then Cayson came over with a pack of beer in his hands. He stilled when he saw me but tried to hide his disappointment.
I looked away and tried not to cry.
Everyone eyed us back and forth, picking up on the unspoken hostility. It would be awkward for a long time, at least if things stayed that way. Slade left the couch and spoke to Cayson like nothing was wrong.
“You want to get a bet going?” Slade asked.
Cayson opened his beer. “I feel bad taking money from you.”
“Ha,” Slade said sarcastically. “I feel bad taking some cash out of your son’s college tuition.”
Cayson chuckled. “You talk so much shit, man.”
“A hundred bucks?” Slade asked. “Who’s talking shit now?”
“You’re on.” Cayson shook his hand.
Rhett walked through the door, wearing a long-sleeve shirt with dark jeans. He was definitely a pretty man. If I weren’t so hung up on Cayson I might actually be attracted to him. “I brought pizza.” He held up two boxes.
“Thanks, man.” Slade took it from him and placed it on the table.
“Thanks for inviting me,” Rhett said.
“No problem,” Slade said. “Let me introduce you.” He took him to Trinity first. “This is my wife, Trinity. She’s off limits.” He suddenly gave Rhett a threatening look.
Rhett extended his hand to shake hers but Slade growled loudly. “Uh…nice to meet you.” Rhett pulled his hand back.
Trinity looked embarrassed.
Slade introduced him to everyone else before he came to me. “This is my cousin, Skye. She works for PIXEL. She’s a hot shot CEO.”
“He exaggerates…” I shook his hand even though I’d already met him.
“He does that a lot,” Rhett said. “But I have a feeling he isn’t doing that now.” He turned on the charm and he was quite good at it. “Can I get you some water or something?”
“Uh…sure.”
Rhett retrieved a bottle of water then handed it to me. “So, how far along are you?”
It felt strange having this same conversation again. “Nearly seven months.”
“Well, congratulations. Is it a boy or a girl?”
“A boy.”
“Very nice.” He took the seat beside me. “Your husband must be excited.”
“Uh…” I eyed Cayson, who was staring at us.
Rhett spoke before I could respond. “Oh sorry. I didn’t mean to assume…”
“No, it’s okay.” At least I didn’t have to actually answer the question.
“I’m divorced,” he said. “I’ve been divorced for about a year.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” It was hard to be sincere when I knew he was lying.
“We loved each other but there were a few things she couldn’t look past.”
I wondered if Cayson were listening to us. “Like what?”
“Well, I worked with an ex for a while but never told her about it…when she found out she thought I was hiding something. And then I saw some suspicious messages on her phone and that led to a few fights. Basically, we just couldn’t make it work.” He drank his beer but didn’t ask me about my marriage.
“Did you have any children?”
“No,” he said sadly. “But I wish we had. I’m almost thirty and I don’t have any kids yet. It’d be nice to have one running around.”
“I’m sure it’ll happen for you someday.”
Rhett continued to talk to me, being friendly and never crossing that line. He told me about his life, which was totally made up, and he made me laugh a few times. At some point, I forgot this was all an act for Cayson. It actually started to feel like a real friendship. “So, you like PIXEL?”
“I love it…for the most part.” I didn’t love it now. And I hadn’t loved it in a while. Being this depressed destroyed any enjoyment I could possibly have.
“Your family owns it?�
�
“My grandfather started it in his garage. Then my dad and uncle took over. Soon, it’ll be mine and my cousin’s.”
“Conrad?” he asked. “I played ball with him the other day. He’s pretty cool.”
“Yeah, he’s great.” Well, right now he wasn’t great. He was pretty lost, actually.
“Excuse me. I’m going to get another beer. Would you like something?”
The game was already over. I didn’t realize how long we were talking for. “I’ll have another water.”
“Coming right up.” He grabbed the empty water bottle and immediately walked into the kitchen.
Immediately, Cayson headed my way.
Was this plan already working? He was headed right for the spot beside me on the couch. Was he going to talk to me?
Cayson sat down. “Is he bothering you?” The protective side of him was there, just like it used to be. He watched me closely like he was searching for distress.
“No…he’s very nice.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yeah, I like him. He’s funny.”
When Cayson was relieved, he backed off. “Just wanted to make sure.”
He had no idea how much it meant to me that he said those words. He was checking on me just the way he used to. Sometimes he was so hostile to me I wasn’t sure if he really cared for me anymore. When I looked down I noticed the black wedding band he always wore. He never removed it and he continued to wear it just the way I wore mine.
“Can I walk you to your car?” he asked. “It’s dark outside.”
Maybe this plan was working. “Sure.” I wasn’t ready to leave, but if Cayson offered to do something for me I wasn’t going to turn him down.
We said goodbye to everyone and walked out. Slade gave me a final wink before the door shut behind us. Together, we took the elevator to the bottom floor. Cayson didn’t touch me or make conversation. But he didn’t seem so hostile anymore.
“How are you?” I asked.
He shook his head slightly. “Shitty. You?”
“The same.” I didn’t talk about us. Slade told me not to, and since he knew Cayson so well I went with his advice.
“How’s our son?”
“Good. He kicks every now and then.”