The Reincarnationist Papers

by Eric Maikranz

  "That's an understatement," Chance said chuckling.

  "Evan, I offer you one political favor with the government of your choice, almost all of them are indebted to me in some way or another. I know it may not sound like much now, but as many in this room could tell you, in a pinch, at the right time, it is worth more than all the tea in China."

  "That's no joke," said Mr. Ing.

  "Thank you," I said holding up my glass for the passing wine girl. "Hopefully I won't have to use it."

  "You're not living a rich enough life if you don't," laughed Chance, rolling his yellow-white eyes toward me.

  One by one, they came forward with an offering. The gifts were as varied as the individuals, from clay cuneiform tablets to carte blanche use of a harem, fifty women and ten boys strong.

  "Are you finished eating Samas?" Poppy asked sarcastically.

  "Yes I am," he said wiping his hands as he got to his feet. "I have already made Evan a very generous offer. It is with that that I welcome him into our company."

  "What is it?" asked Auda.

  He stood up as straight as a soldier. "Alas it is still on the table, so discretion should be the rule of the day."

  "Very well. That leaves you," Poppy said to Clovis, the old man.

  He struggled to his feet. "I brought something from my homeland. A jambiya dagger with bejeweled silver sheath and Rhinoceros horn handle. Be careful," he said removing it from his waistband and handing it to me. "The damask blade is quite sharp."

  The handle fit my hand perfectly. I removed the dagger from its sheath and looked at the blade in the flickering torchlight. The tip of the blade curved curiously down instead of up toward the thumb. "Thank you," I said, admiring it.

  "What about you?" Ramsay shouted up to Poppy.

  She smiled. "Not unlike Samas, I've already made an offering to Evan. It's the cane lying beside him, offered to me by Charles Le Brun on behalf of his Majesty King Louis of France."

  "Nice. I remember this little dragon." Chance said, leaning over to pick it up. "Very nice."

  "Thank you," I said to him, then nodded up at Poppy.

  "That's everyone isn't it?" asked Chance. "Is our table ready Mr. Diltz?"

  "Yes. It's set up by the pool sir."

  "Great. Let's play," said Auda, getting slowly to his feet. Several others got up and followed him over to the table as Poppy lead the female quartet onto the stage.

  I leaned over toward Ramsay and touched her on the shoulder.

  "Yes?" she said flashing her pale grey eyes at me.

  "I'm curious, the vote on me was four to one, who cast the descending vote?"

  She shook her head. "We are sworn to confidentiality, but I will tell you it wasn't me. The Hoxa story did it for me. I think it's fantastic that you knew him. I wish I had."

  "That's ironic," I mused, "everyone that knew him wished they hadn't." Our laughs were greeted by scowls from the four men tuning their instruments on stage.

  "Maybe we should get out of here," she said looking over toward the game. "Have you ever had your fortune read?"

  "No," I said confused.

  "Let's go then." She got up and walked over to a small red cloth covered table set up halfway between the long banquet table and the poker game. Samas sat at the table across from a middle aged Gypsy woman, her hair tucked neatly under a yellow scarf pulled tightly over her head.

  She held a handful of oversized cards and nodded thoughtfully at him. "You are a very happy man are you not?" she asked in a thick accent as we approached. He nodded. "But I sense something troubles you," she said, studying the cards. "It's a longing you've had for a long time, yes?"

  "Yes."

  "This goal will be attained very soon," she said in an exaggerated nod.

  Ramsay placed her hand on Samas' shoulder. "That must mean you're finally going to lose that last fifteen pounds to get down to your ideal weight of 310."

  "305," he said looking over his shoulder at her. "Why don't you see what she has to say about you?" He stood up and offered his seat.

  "Sure." Ramsay sat down and held her hand out to the Gypsy. "My name is Nadja."

  "Madame Dana," she said taking Ramsay's hand, double taking on the black tattoo. "The other man had one of these too. What is it?"

  "None of your business," Ramsay said, holding out a fifty franc note.

  The string quartet began to play as the Gypsy woman took the bill and folded it into her brassiere. "Palmistry or Tarot?"

  "Oh Palmistry of course," Ramsay replied.

  The Gypsy took Ramsay's hand and studied it, looking down her nose at the lines through crude, wire rimmed spectacles. "You will continue to be very successful in your business endeavors. You will have more work than you can handle."

  "Continue," Ramsay said unconvinced.

  "I see many men in your future."

  "Really?"

  "Yes, many men will fall under the spell of your charms, especially during the next twelve months," said the gypsy woman raising her eyebrows.

  "Interesting."

  "And you will live for a long time."

  "How insightful," Ramsay said winking facetiously at me. “Why don't you take a shot Evan."

  "Not for fifty francs," I said, taking a step back.

  "Go ahead, it's on me." She laid down another bill.

  The Gypsy took my hand and traced several lines with a long yellowing fingernail. "I sense that yours is a very old soul."

  "Actually he is one of the younger ones," Ramsay said chuckling. She placed a hand on my shoulder. "I'm going to check out the game. Come over when you're finished." She walked away, leaving me alone with the Gypsy.

  "You've been alone for a large part of your life, yes?" the mystic said in the form of a question.

  I nodded.

  "You are in the middle of great changes happening in your life, yes?"

  I nodded again, wondering if I wore my emotions on my sleeve.

  "Many opportunities and adventures are open to you now, but you know this already yes?"

  I nodded.

  "But still there is something that troubles you, yes?"

  "Yes--"

  "Don't tell me," she said quickly. "It is a tantalizing opportunity, but one you don't feel your ready for or worthy of."

  "Yes, but how did you--" She held up a hand to interrupt me.

  "I sense that you're not a very trusting person. You are accustomed to depend only on yourself." She looked back down at my hand. "It shows that this opportunity, if taken, will change your life dramatically."

  "What about money?" I asked.

  "Ooh, great wealth awaits you. I can see it right here," she said, tracing a long line on my palm with a boney finger.

  Boisterous laughter periodically rang out from the game. Spectators stood in a circle around the seated players.

  I'd heard enough. "Thank you," I said, withdrawing my hand. "Thank you."

  I walked over to the edge of the crowd, thinking about what she had said. I peered over Samas' and Ramsay's shoulders to get a glimpse of the action. "What's going on?"

  "No one has ever driven Chance from the table, but Auda is close. He hasn't lost a hand yet," Samas whispered.

  "What did she have to say?" Ramsay asked.

  "She said great wealth awaits me."

  "Of course she did young Evan," Chance crooned. "Why do you think they call it fortune telling."

  "I call your bet," said Auda. "What do you have?"

  "Three Queens." Chance said, his wide smile evaporating with each heart Auda turned over.

  "Flush," said Auda, pulling a mound of different sized silver and gold coins toward him.

  "Blast!" shouted Chance. "That's fourteen hands in a row."

  "Maybe he's cheating," Poppy said to Chance.

  "That's irrelevant. Nobody cheats better than I do."

  "You shouldn't have given your lucky dice to Evan," said Auda, goading him on.

  Chance turned in his seat. Samas and Ramsay step
ped aside to give him a clear view of me. "I'll give you one thousand dollars right now if you loan me the dice for a few hours," he said, a slight tinge of prideful desperation in his voice.

  I went for my pocket and was about to say yes when Auda spoke.

  "Evan I'll give you two if you don't," he said.

  Chance turned to his opponent. "You would," he said, sinking back into his seat. The impish cards were almost completely obscured by his thick, sausage fingers.

  Auda picked an oversized gold coin out of the pile and weighted it in the palm of his hand. "This feels about right." He tossed the coin up to me.

  I looked across the table at Chance. "No dice," I said pocketing the coin. Several chuckles and pats on the back came as they dealt anew.

  A second staff girl accompanied Auda's wine stewardess as they made another round. The new girl offered fresh goblets as the other filled. I took a full one and marveled at the craftsmanship. The fresh goblets were made of silver with gold braiding inlaid around the rim. "How old are these?" I asked holding it up.

  "Who cares, so long as they still work," said Chance before emptying his in one long swallow. "Refill please." He held his goblet under the large urn's spout.

  "Darling, you found me," Auda said to his wine girl. "Come over here and quench my desire."

  Anger filled her eyes as she circled around to his side of the table. Auda held out his goblet in his left hand and shuffled coins with his right. "Tell me my sweet, what will it take to possess you?" he asked showing his gapped teeth.

  "Give it up Auda," said Poppy walking over to her. "She likes girls. She's a lesbian, aren't you dear." Poppy ran her fingers through the girl’s hair. Embarrassment fueled the fury welling up inside her and the urn began to shake in her pale chubby hands.

  Auda didn't miss a step and reached out to grip her firmly again. "Well then, you should like me all the more my sweet, for I know the Sultana’s secrets of feminine pleasure.” She flushed completely red and stormed off amid uproarious laughter. "Oh no, I think I've offended her delicate sensibilities," he said, looking around the table. "Do you really think she is a lesbian?" he asked Poppy.

  "Oh I'm sure of it."

  "Give the poor creature a rest," said Chance, unable to stop laughing at his inadvertent pun.

  "You're a fine one to talk, especially after that Umo incident." said Ramsay. Everyone else at the table smiled and nodded knowingly.

  "What's the Umo incident?" I asked.

  Ramsay snickered at Chance then turned to me. "Two trips back, Chance stumbled upon an untouched tribe of Indonesian natives that still lived in the stone age for all intents and purposes. They called themselves the Umo. Chance managed to get himself welcomed into their society as a deity, a superior being, which is a joke in and of itself. The only thing superior about him back then was his sexual appetite. Eventually he became their king and exacted an expensive tribute from the Umo, an oral tribute," she said smiling.

  "I don't follow," I said.

  "King Hazard over there demanded fellatio be performed on him several times a day by the women of the village to appease the angry gods he represented."

  "That's outrageous," I laughed.

  "It worked too," Chance said throwing coins into the pot.

  "What happened?" I asked.

  Ramsay giggled again. "He literally had all the women of the village cowering at his feet. It was only months later when he became bored and began to demand tribute from the young boys that he ran into trouble. What was it Chance, beheading or dismemberment?" she asked.

  "Both, but unfortunately not in that order."

  "That's twisted," I said.

  "Yeah, but it was fun," he answered. “Hazard, King of the Umo.”

  I laughed to myself and stepped back away from the table.

  The string quartet continued to play on stage. Several couples waltzed among the columns, their counter-clockwise turns delivering them back to a time when the music was new.

  Ramsay tapped me on the shoulder and shoved the opium pipe mouthpiece into my hand. Her face contorted into a grimace as she held in a lungful of smoke. I placed the ivory tip in my mouth and inhaled without a second thought, the caustic smoke burning in my throat and chest. The tarry stale taste stayed in my mouth long after I'd exhaled.

  "It's good isn't it?" she asked.

  I felt its tingling effects as I stared into her grey eyes. "Yeeesss." I said in one exaggerated syllable.

  She laughed and took another draw off the pipe. "Oh I want to watch this," she said in a stream of smoke. "They're going to dance." She motioned over to the Gypsy girls following the string quartet off stage.

  "Dance?" I asked.

  "Yes. Gypsies are born entertainers. It can be pretty erotic."

  "I'll be over in a second," I said to her. "Wait," I said to the young woman carrying the pipe. "Don't leave just yet."

  I floated lazily back onto the pillows in the center of the reclining crowd. Violins, tambourine, accordion, and guitars combined in a raucous rhythm as five young girls danced on stage in gyrating, staccato movements. Their bright dresses and scarves blurred into colorful swirls as I struggled to keep my eyes focused.

  "How are you doing?" asked a voice next to me.

  I kept my eyes locked on the girl in the center and didn't turn to see who it was. "I'm feeling pretty good."

  "Good for you. Say, do you see anything you like?"

  "What?" I asked.

  "The girls, do you see any you like?"

  "Yes, I like her," I said pointing with an unsteady hand.

  "Only one?" the voice whispered in my ear. "Don't be so modest. You're a young man. This party is for you, enjoy yourself."

  "Okay." I felt my words begin to slur. "The one on the end is cute too."

  "That's the spirit, that's the spirit," said the voice trailing off into the background music.

  I watched intently as, one by one, they untied their blouses, letting them fall to the stage. The tempo of the music intensified after the last girl exposed herself, and all reentered the dance at an accelerated pace, spinning and whipping their black hair in wide arcs. I remained focused on the middle one, taking another full wine goblet each time a staff girl passed by. Cheers and groans periodically carried over from the shrinking crowd around the game table.

  "Pretty sexy," said a tall, thin, dark haired man after he'd fallen onto the pillows where Chance had laid. He wore a two piece suit tailored of black leather.

  "How did you do Tobias?" Ramsay asked him, motioning back to the table.

  "I lost about 85000."

  "That's not as bad as last time," she said.

  "True." He grabbed the pipe girl by the ankle as she passed, and then took three long drags in a row off of the braided serpentine hose.

  I changed my focus from the girl to the long, leather clad man. "So what's your slant?" I slurred.

  "My slant," he repeated thoughtfully. He rolled over on his side to address me directly. "My slant on this whole thing is that we are creatures inspired by a divinity that desires to question the authority of mankind's contrived Godheads. It is the only thing I've found that explains us. You see, or will eventually see, that slowly, imperceptibly, God and his hierology slips away from you until there is only the self. If there is no God then there can only be the self. Selfishness necessarily supplants itself in the vacuum created by Godlessness, but this realization happens so slowly that the average man will never grasp it during his short earthly tenure. That answers what, but it doesn't answer why. I think that eventually we are supposed to enlighten the whole of humanity to this truth and lead them out of their self imposed darkness."

  "Believe me they will be much happier in their own world," said Ramsay. "You and Poppy need to get those crazy thoughts out of your heads."

  "It's more than just she and I," he said, turning toward her.

  "You just remember it's a moot point," she said sternly.

  He ignored her. "That's my slant," he sa
id to me.

  "Are you stirring up trouble?" asked Samas walking up behind us.

  "No. I'm just soliciting opinions," I answered.

  His large drunken form teetered precariously over me. "How ironic, I was just about to solicit an opinion from you about my offer."

  His question brought anxiety to the forefront of my clouded mind. "It's too soon Samas. I need some time to think about it and some space to breathe. I'll get back to you later, fair enough?"

  "Agreed," he said with disappointment, before staggering off toward the ransacked banquet tables.

  "What was that about?" asked Ramsay.

  "A business proposal," I said, getting up. "I'll be back. I need to walk around a minute."

  I placed the cane under me and stumbled from column to column toward the back of the room. Auda and Chance were the only players left at the table. The lesbian wine girl sat humbly in a chair next to the Egyptian, a defeated expression showing on her face as she watched the game, uninterested.

  Mr. Ing hovered around the table looking at the players’ cards and perked up noticeably as Poppy walked toward him, a petite young woman walked next to her. I forced my eyes into a squint to make them obey. When they walked into the ring of torches circling the poker table I saw what it was about the young woman that had caught my eye. Her body and face were normal, but the back part of her head, the cranial cavity, was radically underdeveloped, giving her a distinctly alien, yet childish appearance, like having a human face on an ape's head if such a thing were possible.

  "Is she for me?" Mr. Ing asked in an excited voice.

  Poppy nodded seductively.

  "Then you truly did bring something for everyone. Tell me where in the world did you find such a beautiful little pinhead?"

  "Shhh," Poppy held her finger to her lips. “She doesn't like that word, use microcephalic."

  Ing nodded knowingly. "What's your name little one?"

  "Monika," she said in a happy childlike tone. "Are you drinking again?" she asked quixotically as though she'd known him.

  A startled expression came over his face as he looked at Poppy then back at her. "No I'm not drinking, I've been good. Let me show you," he said stroking the blond hair on her abbreviated head as he led her off into the darkness.