by H. M. Ward
“Are you okay?”
“Fine. I can handle anything, remember? Just fix things with Carter, okay?”
“I will. I promise.”
She smirks. “Yeah, how are you going to do it?”
“I have no idea.”
Chapter 7
I text Carter, but he doesn’t reply. I’m going to have to go to his dorm room, and I need more than a simple apology. On my way across campus, after my classes are over for the day, Josh falls in step with me and drapes an arm over my shoulder. “Hey, babe! How’s the rebound sex coming?” He laughs at his pun.
I shake him off. “None of your business.”
“You didn’t hook up with anyone yet? That’s absurd. You’re gorgeous.”
I stop and glare at him. “That just turns me on more.” Josh offers a sexy smile and winks at me. He’s wearing a light blue button-down shirt with perfectly-pressed light-colored khakis.
Ignoring him, I ask, “Where are you going?”
“Do I look good?”
“Do you always need your ego stroked?”
He grins. “It never hurts. Tell me I’m pretty, Kerry, so we can both get on with our lives.”
I roll my eyes and say it. “You’re pretty. Happy?”
“For now.” He reaches over and tries to take my shoulder bag that has all my books inside.
I swat his hand away, but he doesn’t stop trying. “Dear God, Kerry, just give it to me.” He tugs it away from me and carries the bag. This kind of guy is rare. I don’t know how to classify him, but it’s a combination of dashing, daring, and dumb.
“You’re annoying.”
“I know.” He smiles over at me. “So, I heard things.”
I stare straight ahead and ignore the prickling sensation at the back of my neck. “Did you?”
“Yes, I did. Curious things, Kerry. They were the kind of rumors that can’t possibly be true.”
“Why not?”
“Because if they were, you’d be even more of a goddess than you already are. It was so fucking sexy—I can’t believe they were talking about you.” He’s watching me with an expression on his face that makes my heart pound hard. It’s the sex face, the I-want-you face. Matt used to look at me like that—complete adoration fueled by lust. That’s the way Josh is eyeing me now.
I stop walking and stare at him. My eyebrows knit together, and I fold my arms over my chest, glaring, “What are you talking about?”
He leans in close to my ear, his lips brushing against my skin as he speaks, “Your secret is safe with me, don’t worry. I’m just saying that you don’t have to pretend anymore.”
“Pretend what?” My hands are on my hips, and I’m ready to strangle him.
“That you don’t put out for free.” He rubs his thumb against his two forefingers, indicating that there’s money involved. My spine straightens, and I’m ready to scream, but his voice is so even and soft that I stand there, frozen between wanting to hear more and junk punching him. “I knew that banging body wasn’t off limits, and don’t worry—I didn’t tell Beth. You know how girls get when other women are open-minded.”
I smile at him and lean in close like I might kiss him. Before I speak, I grab the collar of his shirt and squeeze it tight. “You’re a dick. It’s not true, and if you don’t tell me who started that rumor right now, I’ll make sure you sing soprano for a week.”
He laughs and puts his hand on top of mine, caressing it. “Kerry, Kerry. I knew I liked you.”
Irritated, I tighten my grip. “Tell me.”
“Someone who knows you well. Apparently, there was a reason Carter was following you around campus. He wasn’t begging for scraps, he knew where to get the good stuff. And I thought you were a tease. Good cover, by the way. No one would suspect a damned thing with that get up you’ve got going on.”
I’m stunned. “Carter? He said that about me?”
He nods. “I might have overheard him talking about you and an indecent incident. Another guy saw you in the men’s room when you first got here, and then the modeling thing. It all fits your MO. Sexual favors from a beautiful woman. You should have told me. I could have helped you out, sent you clients.”
His voice sounds like it’s far away and it takes a few minutes to realize that he believes it. I turn and see his eyes wide and dark, curious. “Josh, it’s not true. He lied.”
His smile drops instantly. “I’m sorry, what? It’s not true. That means that Carter was, what? Crucifying you to a bunch of guys, and speaking loud enough that I heard him as I walked by? Why would he do that to you?”
My bottom lip begins to quiver, and I want to sink into the lawn and die. Carter is telling people this about me? Is he saying I’m a whore? Oh, God! Josh's stance changes and he morphs into big brother mode. His arm is over my shoulder, and we’re in his car before I can start crying. Anger pours off of the guy. “He lied? He made this shit up? Carter never lies!”
“Oh, God.” I cry into my hands, and when I look up, I see the truth in his eyes. I know what it means, and so does he. “Everyone will believe him.”
Chapter 8
Josh finds Beth quickly, explains what happened, then announces he’s late for a date. I shake my head. Less than an hour ago, he was trying to buy my services. He can tell what I’m thinking.
He whispers, “I’m a dick, what do you want me to say? I’m not passing up a chance with you, paid or not.” He shrugs and ducks back into his car, before peeling away.
Beth is standing with me in front of the bus. She glances up at it. “Come on. Let’s gas this sucker up and head out to the STIC.”
“What stick?”
“Not what stick, the STIC. It’s my brothers’ place. They rent a house together and refer to it as the STIC. Sexy Testosterone Induced Coma. S.T.I.C.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, I know. Sometimes I think I’m adopted. At the same time, if you want to know what guys are really like behind all the flirting and flattery, there you go.”
I laugh. “They want to STIC you.”
“Touché.”
I snort. “They’re only interested in their sticks.” I smirk and look over at Beth, who is eyeing the bus.
“Come on. I’ll drive you over to the sticky place, and we can bake cookies. I’ll share my guys suck recipe with you. It’s top secret.”
“The O cookies?”
She nods. “Fuck, yeah! Who needs a guy when you have those?”
I giggle and wipe the tears from my eyes, forgetting about Carter for a moment. Beth climbs into the drivers seat and starts the bus. I plop down behind her. Before the raccoon can pitch a fit, she shifts the thing into gear and floors it. Me and Rocky are plastered to our seats as Beth bolts from the campus.
Chapter 9
My jeans are caked with flour, and my hair is tied in a sloppy ponytail when another one of her brothers walks into the house. He calls to her, “Beth? Where’d you get a bus?”
“How’d he know you were here?” I mouth to her.
She shrugs. “I’m pretty sure my mother had me chipped when they did the dog. Seriously, they always know where I am.”
A guy that looks like Josh and Jace rounds the corner to the kitchen. I’m standing at the table chopping up bits of Butterfingers with a huge knife. He stops and sweeps his eyes over me quickly. “She’s right. We did have her chipped with Fluffy. The two of them kept making plans to run away together. Something had to be done.” He walks over, pops a bit of the candy in his mouth, and looks up at me. “I’m Justin.”
“Kerry.”
“Nice to meet you.”
I glance at Beth and then at Justin. “You seem a little too normal to be related to Josh and Jace.”
He laughs. “Yeah, I get that a lot. They’re middle children.”
“Well, that explains everything.”
He nods like it does, and pops another piece of candy in his mouth. “Not that I want to throw you out of my home, but I have some guys coming over to wo
rk on a project. When will you be done?”
“If you don’t kick us out, I can feed you guys cookies.” She makes a throaty noise and chants, “Me love cookies,” nailing a Cookie Monster impersonation.
“Fine, but stay in the kitchen. I don’t need these guys hitting on you. Then Josh will freak out, and Jace will make sure they never breathe again. We don’t need a repeat of the Ronald incident.”
Beth shoots daggers at her brother. “No. We certainly do not.”
“Who’s Ronald?”
Beth says, “Don’t ask,” at the same time as Justin says, “Her last boyfriend.”
I smile and quietly watch the exchange between them. Beth tries to continue cooking like it doesn’t bother her, but I know it does. They meddle. No, it’s beyond that. They’re an infestation and equally difficult to dislodge.
“He only wanted one thing.”
“Right. Because a guy couldn’t possibly like me for me.”
“You’re naïve. Good thing we’re around.”
“Wait a second.” They stop and look at me. “Not that I don’t want to hear the Ronald story, because I do, but do you seriously think guys and girls can’t be friends? It’s only about getting in girls' panties, all the time?”
“Yeah, I mean the challenge is nice once in a while, but at the end of the day, it’s all about the snatch.”
“So you speak for all mankind? Like, you guys had a meeting and decided it’s pussy or die trying?” I’m laughing at him. I can’t help it. He’s so proper and hearing him talk like this doesn’t match his demeanor. “Did the male slut committee provide you with that lovely gingham shirt as a parting gift?”
“Laugh all you want, but it’s always about sex. Men need it. End of story. Girls like to think it’s romantic and loving, but that’s as far from the truth as you can get. Which is why we chipped Beth and scared the shit out of Ronny.” He smirks and tries to steal some batter from Beth, who promptly slaps his hand with the wooden spoon she’s using.
She’s shorter than him, by a lot, with flour in her hair and batter on her sleeves. It doesn’t matter that she rolled them up. Cooking is a contact sport for that woman. “That wasn’t funny.”
“It wasn’t supposed to be. He was using you.”
“For sex?” I ask.
He nods. “Yeah, what else would it be?”
Beth’s jaw is locked. She swallows hard. “Well, we’ll never know now will we?”
He leans back against the counter. “We knew, Beth. Like it or not, he was an asshole. No one is screwing with you while I’m around. Especially not a douchebag like that.”
“What’d Ronald do?” I shouldn’t ask. Beth hasn’t told me this story yet and from the way she’s beating the batter, she’s still pissed about it.
“What didn’t he do? Stalked her until she agreed to go out with him. Pressured her to hide that they were dating. Then, when he tried to nail her, well, things didn’t go his way.”
“They found us and threw Ronald out of the car naked and left him there,” she says coldly, her gaze shifting to me. “It was raining and close to freezing. Guess who didn’t want to date me after that? Guess who said I wasn’t worth it?” She’s gnashing her teeth and beating the dough even though it’s done.
“That’s horrible.”
“No, it’s not. He was an asshole. The guy’s Facebook page was filled with naked pictures of Beth. What was I supposed to do? Let him nail her and post all that shit? I don’t think so.”
She drops her spoon and shouts, “There were no pictures!”
“Just because I didn’t see them didn’t mean they weren’t there.”
“Yes! That’s exactly what it means!”
“Josh saw them.”
“Josh lies, Justin. Everyone knows that. If you guys break up another relationship I’ll become a lesbian, and you can’t stop me!” Beth stomps down the hallway and walks into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.
I glance up at her brother. “What if you were wrong? What if he liked her?”
He shakes his head. “He was using her, and if she hadn’t tried to hide it, things wouldn’t have gotten that far. No matter what she says, the guy did post the pictures. I did see one of them. He cut off Beth’s head, but it was her bra. I’ve seen it in the wash.”
I fish, wondering about Nathan. Why would he ask to be friends if he didn’t want it? “So, if a guy says let’s be friends and turns down sex, what does that mean?”
Justin's forehead wrinkles and he sweeps his eyes over me again, slower this time. When his eyes reach mine he shrugs. “It means he’s gay.”
“What if he’s not? I’m serious. What is that?”
He scoops a finger full of batter from the dish and pops it in his mouth. He folds his arms across his chest and leans against the counter. “You offered what, exactly?”
Instantly, my face starts to burn. “Fuck buddies. No strings.”
“And he said no?” He frowns and starts shaking his head. “No clue. That’s weird. Maybe he doesn’t like pussy as much as he thinks. Like I said, guys think with their dicks—all of us do. There are no exceptions.”
“You sound like Josh.”
“Josh is an idiot, but on this point, he sounds like me.” He winks at me. The doorbell rings, and he excuses himself to get it. A horde of upperclassmen rush through the door, all with a bottle of liquor in tow. They file into the kitchen, put the booze on the counter, and steal our fresh-baked snackage.
I don’t recognize any of them. There are seven total and suddenly way more liquor than they could possibly use. One girl with long brown hair sets a bottle of vodka on the counter and points to the now half gone tray of cookies. She’s the only one who asks, “May I please have one?”
I step across the small space and hand her the tray. “Take the whole thing out there. Another batch is about to come out of the oven.”
“Are these Beth Cookies?”
I smirk and know what she’s getting at. Beth’s cookies are orgasmic. Apparently she has a reputation. “Yeah, eat with caution.”
“Don’t I always?” She makes a funny face and takes a bite, moaning as she chews. It’s a little disturbing.
I look away from her and at the liquor. All the labels are the same. “Was that a coincidence or did you plan to bring the same bottle?”
She nods. “It makes it fair. No one shows up empty-handed, and we all paid the same amount for it. Plus, we eliminate the risk of some fool showing up with a bottle of Manischewitz. You gotta spend more than a $1.88 to get into a swank study group like this.” She’s surprisingly serious.
“Yeah, study group.” I tip my head toward the liquor. “The topic of study appears to be ways to drink potatoes.”
She snorts a laugh and slaps her hands over her mouth. “You’re funny. But, no, seriously. It works well unless you don’t know your stuff. Then you’re screwed. Think of it like any normal drinking game where every time you miss a question you take a shot. No one wants to be shitfaced before the third round. That’s just embarrassing.” She reaches for another cookie and skips into the other room.
They grab two of the bottles and get started in the next room. I put in another sheet of cookies and set the timer. Eventually, Beth emerges with puffy eyes. I feel like a jerk for letting the conversation go that way. Maybe I didn’t have a choice, but I could have said something.
The guys in the next room get loud every time someone has to take a drink. For a while it’s quiet, then they hit a patch where they go through an entire bottle pretty quick. Justin rushes in and grabs another bottle. He points at Beth, “Don’t touch any of these. Got it?”
“Yeah, yeah.” She waves her hand dismissively, and he rushes back to his guests.
Beth seems so sad, so caught up in her own hell that I decide to share some of mine.
“So, the hot guy with the sketch pad…”
She’s balling up dough on a cookie sheet and looks up at me. “Yeah, what about him?”
/>
“I might have seen him a few times since then.” I smile awkwardly, as she gasps with a huge grin on her face. “I might also have an insane crush on him.”
“Where did you meet again? Seriously, I can’t believe you even talked to him after he walked out on you like that. So, what happened?” She pulls open the oven door, pushes the cookie tray inside, and closes the door before setting a timer and sitting down at the little old table.
I’m across from her, balling more dough onto another sheet. “We made out a couple of times, and, when things got to the point where we couldn’t exactly continue in public, everything went to hell.”
“What? Why?”
“He works at the university.”
“So? That shouldn’t be a problem unless he’s a professor or something.” She’s smiling like that couldn’t happen, but, when I don’t answer, her jaw drops, and she gapes at me. “You nailed a professor?”
“No! And keep your voice down. The last thing I need is more rumors floating around. Don’t tell anyone, but we didn’t know. He’s my drawing teacher. He was gone the first week of class. By the time I figured out what was going on, we were already—well, we were supposed to go to his place that night.”
“But you didn’t, right?” Beth leans forward, and her eyes bug out of her head. “Holy shit! Kerry! You did him anyway?”
I grimace at the way she says it. That’s what it was supposed to be, but that’s not what happened. “No, we didn’t do anything. It was weird. As soon as he realized I was a student, he blew me off. So I went to his house. In the bus. With the raccoon.”
Beth looks like she’s going to have a heart attack. She’s clutching her chest and leaning halfway across the table. “And?”
“And he sent me home. Rebound gone wrong in every possible way. Add in the shit with Carter and I’ve had the worst day known to man.”