My Whole World

by Davidson King

  “Let me get the nurse.” She went to move when the other guy walked up to the bed.

  “Stay, Poppy. I’ll get her.” He met my eyes briefly before stepping out of the room.

  “We could’ve just hit the button,” I said.

  “I think Desi is giving us a second. Toby, do you remember what happened? I mean, there’s no wondering who did this or anything, but the cops are going to want to talk to you.”

  So many cops worked for Vick, there was no way to know who would show up and if they were on his payroll.

  “Poppy, I can’t. He owns a lot of the cops.” I started coughing, and that pain I was trying to avoid came at me full force.

  “Okay, no more of that,” a nurse said as she walked in, Desi behind her. “Good to see you’re up.”

  “What…what day is it?”

  “Friday, two fifteen in the afternoon,” she said with a smile as she started checking my vitals.

  “Atlas. I need to talk to him.”

  Poppy smiled and squeezed my hand gently. “He has a huge party tonight. He was actually going to cancel it, but I knew you’d be angry if he did, so with Desi and Ciro’s help we convinced him to go. He said right after that you and he had a promised date.”

  Shit. “Poppy, listen…”

  “Mr. St. Claire, the doctor will be in shortly. I have some painkillers for you, and I want to change the ice on your shoulder. It was dislocated, and keeping the swelling down is key. You can’t move it because it’s in a shoulder immobilizer.”

  “Okay, thank you, but…”

  “Just sit tight, dear, he’ll be here in a moment.” After she injected what I assumed was the pain meds into my IV, she left, and I met Desi’s watchful eyes.

  “Desi, right?” He nodded. “You need to call Atlas, tell him he needs to cancel tonight. He has to!”

  “Toby, what’s this about? He said he’d be here at the end of the night.” Poppy brushed the hair from my eyes and gently kissed my hand.

  “Why, Toby?” Desi asked.

  “Vick knew about the party tonight. Who it was for. I think he’s planning on doing something. I know he is. He told me he was gonna have guys there. And I was to ignore them and do my job.”

  Desi frowned. “If he kicked your ass, how’d he think you’d be there tonight?”

  And this was where it was going to get messy. “He told me a few days ago.”

  Realization dawned on Desi’s face, and guilt clogged my throat.

  “You were working Atlas?”

  “I never wanted to, and I didn’t tell Vick who the party was for, and that’s why I’m in this bed. He found out, knew I lied, and said I no longer could be trusted.”

  Desi didn’t say anything more. He took out his cell phone and stepped out of the room. I turned to face Poppy. There was no anger or disappointment in her gaze. There was understanding. She knew me better than anyone, and she knew I’d had no choice.

  “It’s going to be okay, Toby.” She squeezed my hand.

  “Atlas isn’t going to want anything to do with me after he finds out.”

  She pressed another kiss to my hand. “Let him make up his own mind, brother.”

  I rested my head back, closed my eyes, and waited for whatever was to come.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Atlas

  “I have a list of songs requested by Sam Ramos and his fiancé.” Ledger handed me a clipboard. I wasn’t completely focused; half my mind was elsewhere. I kept checking my cell phone every five minutes to see the words, “He’s awake.”

  “Hey.”

  “Sorry, I’m trying to get my head in the game.” I read over the list; all the songs seemed fine. “Looks good. I trust you, Ledger. Why’d you feel the need to show me?”

  “To get you out of your head.”

  It was like someone was squeezing my heart. I wanted to be sitting right next to Toby and—

  “You really fucking like this guy.” Ledger broke through my thoughts. “It’s about goddamn time you felt something for someone else. And it sucks a fuckload he’s in a hospital bed beat to shit. You wanna be there.” He wasn’t asking me; he knew. “Look, get out of here. We still have like four hours before the guests of honor arrive. Max and I can order people around until then. Go see him.”

  He squeezed my shoulder, and my hand instinctively reached over and clung to it. “Thank you.”

  I rushed out the back to my car, and halfway to the hospital, my cell rang. I hit the button on my steering wheel, bringing the call to my car speaker. “Yeah?”

  “Atlas?” It was Desi.

  “You called me. Don’t you know who you’re talking to?”

  He chuckled. “Sorry, sounds weird.”

  “You’re on speaker, I’m in my car on the way to the hospital. I want to be there when he wakes up, and I have four hours. So hopefully I won’t miss it.”

  “Yeah, so, you missed it. He’s awake.”

  I couldn’t even be mad. He was awake, and that was a good sign. “Good. I’ll be there in a minute.”

  “Hold up.”

  I stopped at a red light and listened. He told me how Vick was planning something with my party, and while that nearly had me turning my car around to get back to the club, thinking I’d catch whoever it was, it was the next words out of his mouth that made me freeze up.

  “Atlas, Toby has been working for Vick in more than a staff way.”

  “No.”

  “Listen. I’m not sure he was working for him voluntarily. People like Vick Keller, they don’t give you many choices when it comes to doing things. He had to be holding something over Toby’s head.”

  Horns blaring had me looking up. The light was green, but I didn’t move. Cars whizzed around me beeping, hollering.

  “Atlas. Vick caught him lying. He wouldn’t give info on your party, but he knew already. Beat Toby for lying.”

  “Shit.” The light was red again, so I took a second to calm down. I still wanted to see Toby, but I was messed up over this. Familiar emotions of a time long ago surfaced. But Toby wasn’t Joker. I knew that. I did.

  “He doesn’t know you’re coming. Listen, Atlas, I have no idea what Vick is planning, but I don’t think you throw a morsel like a senator’s son at him and he ignores it.”

  When the light turned green, I moved this time. I made a U-turn, heading toward the club. “Tell Toby I will be there after the bachelor party. As angry as I am, I don’t want him worrying. It won’t be good for him.”

  “Okay. Keep me posted?”

  “Yeah. How is he, Desi?”

  “Shoulder’s in a sling thing, concussion. No major damage to his eye, they think, but he got stitches and he has to heal. But he’ll be okay.”

  “Good. Talk to you later.” I hit the button, ending the call, and raced back to Joker’s Sin. I had to figure out how to keep that party going but keep Vick out.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” Max asked as I entered the club.

  I spent the next half hour explaining everything Desi told me and then came to a conclusion I wasn’t sure was perfect, but it would have to do. I wouldn’t have Vick making me run, but I could stop him from getting close.

  “We’re closing the club tonight, leaving it open just for the bachelor party. One thing Senator Ramos told me was that people invited to the bachelor party were mailed a special bracelet. So if they don’t have that on, they don’t get in. Aside from our security, they will have their own. I think we could get through the party easily without Vick getting near.”

  “Closing the club on a Friday?” Max asked as he rested his elbows on the bar top.

  “No choice. I can’t police the floor and the VIP area, and I don’t have enough security to do both effectively. Without knowing what Vick is hoping to accomplish, I’d rather have a club to open Saturday than none at all.”

  They all nodded in agreement, and we got to work devising a plan. There were some patrons deemed regulars that I knew were good people. Le
dger was tasked with inviting them to dance on the stage to keep things fun. I went to my office and sent a message to Sam Ramos explaining I would be closing the club instead of just the floor. To keep him from worrying, I simply said it was a gift from me to them.

  By the time everything was done, there were a couple of hours until the party began. I checked in with Desi, and he said Toby was fine. Poppy was still there with him, and I explained what we were doing. He agreed that Poppy needed to stay where she was, knowing once Vick realized his plan wasn’t going to work, he’d be livid. Then I went to the website and posted that the club was closed for a private party. With nothing left to do businesswise, I went to my bathroom, showered and changed, getting ready for the night. As I washed my body, my thoughts weren’t consumed with the event about to take place; they were filled with what I’d say to Toby when I saw him later.

  The irrational side of me wanted to rage and scream and ask why he couldn’t come to me and tell me. The other calmer side realized he likely had no choice, and for that reason I’d hear him out before deciding my next steps.

  I chose a gold-and-black suit, because one, it was fun and I looked amazing in it, and two, the party tonight was a true affair that was deserving of the best fashion. A little gold face powder, kohl around the eyes, and I was good to go.

  Nothing was going to ruin this night. And when it was all over, I’d go down to the hospital and try to see if whatever Toby and I had going on was salvageable.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Toby

  Every time I woke, it felt like the nurse was giving me more medicine, and I was passing out again. I was glad to see Poppy was still there. In one of my more lucid moments, she explained that Desi told her she had to stay until he knew it was safe.

  I wasn’t sure how much Atlas knew or how much Desi told him, and I was trying not to misread the fact that he hadn’t tried to communicate with me as personal. Desi said all he knew was that Atlas had a plan for the bachelor party, and I was hoping that meant everything would be okay.

  “How are we doing this evening, Mr. St. Claire?” A doctor I’d seen a few times smiled and checked my vitals.

  “Sore. I’d like to be able to stay awake a little longer than five minutes if possible.”

  He chuckled. And I noticed he had a nice smile, kind eyes. But I was also paranoid. I didn’t know who to trust. Who Vick knew.

  “I understand, but your body is in that ‘need to heal’ mode. Physical therapy and such will follow soon enough, but the pain is there, and we need you as relaxed as possible.” He moved to my shoulder, removing the ice pack. “Swelling has lessened. I can remove this for a bit, but if the swelling returns, it goes back.”

  It was better than nothing. There was no question it was freezing. “I’ll take what I can get.”

  “Do you have any idea how long he’ll be in the hospital?” Poppy asked as she moved closer to my bed.

  “Tomorrow I’ll run a few more scans and tests and give you a good time frame. I don’t like to guess on anything.” His blue eyes twinkled as he smiled at me. “Would you like more painkillers? I could give you some time without them, but I would ask that when you begin to hurt too much you call the nurse.”

  “If it’s okay, I’d like to stay a little lucid.”

  He nodded and said he’d inform the nursing staff and see me tomorrow. After he left, I turned my head to where Desi was facing the window.

  “Desi?”

  He turned and came over to my bed. “Yeah?”

  “Have you spoken to Atlas? Does he know…what I did?”

  Desi had been pretty quiet. I knew he was a friend of Ciro’s, and he was watching out for me. He didn’t apologize, but I knew he felt bad something had happened to me. He wasn’t a horrible guy, and right then he was my only link to Atlas.

  “I told him. I can’t tell you what he’ll do, but he did say he’d come by after the party.” He spoke with no inflection.

  “That’s gotta be good then, if he’s coming by,” Poppy said with a small smile.

  “I don’t expect Atlas to forgive me. I’d just like the chance to apologize to him.”

  Desi nodded and went back to the window. He wasn’t a talker but oddly, it felt good having him around. I knew while my eyes were closed, he was watching over Poppy and keeping her safe.

  For the next hour, the three of us were able to eat something, and we kept the TV on just in case there was some breaking news. Never in my life had I watched the news because I wanted updates on someone I knew.

  After eating I was hurting pretty bad, so the nurse came in and gave me something. I wanted to be in better shape for Atlas when he came, so I thought it best to rest for a while. Both Desi and Poppy promised they’d wake me when he arrived and wouldn’t let him leave until I got to apologize.

  “Toby?” I heard Atlas’s voice, and I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming about the man. But then I kept hearing it and fought the strong drugs to open my eyes. He was slightly blurry, but there he was. He wore a black T-shirt and maybe jeans; I couldn’t tell since he was sitting down and quite close to me.

  “Atlas?”

  He didn’t give me his typical bright smile, but there was a twinge of happiness there when I said his name.

  “I was just going to go, but your sister was adamant that I wake you.” He looked over his shoulder to where I assumed Poppy was. “You really should rest, though. I can come back tomorrow.”

  “No.” My good arm shot out and I grabbed his hand. “I need to talk to you.”

  His head dropped, and there was no hiding that Atlas had some battle going on inside that mind of his.

  “Poppy and I will go to the waiting room, have a coffee, whatever. You two take your time,” Desi said.

  “Thank you,” I said and waited until they left to face Atlas again.

  “Before I say anything, can you tell me how the party went?”

  He huffed out a laugh, but his attention was on me again, and damn, he was beautiful. “It went well, actually. Sam and Jeremy are ridiculously in love, and there was a lot of drinking, dancing, and zero issues. We closed the club minus the party, and between my security and the senator’s, there was no way Vick or anyone was ruining the night.”

  “Did he try?”

  “I had put on the website that the club was closed for a private affair, and some people didn’t read it and tried to get in. If any of them were Vick’s people, Ciro didn’t say.”

  I tried to sit up, but pain shot through my shoulder.

  “Stop. I’ll hit the button so you can rise.” He did so and watched intently as I attempted to get comfortable. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to cry or beg for forgiveness.

  “Thanks.”

  “Toby, I want to understand. I want to give you the benefit of the doubt.” His hand touching mine was better than all the pain medicine. “Regardless of what you did to me, you didn’t deserve what Vick did or has been doing to you.”

  “I never wanted to lie to you, Atlas. Ever. So many times I wanted to tell you what was happening, but every time I was face-to-face with Vick, he knew things. And he has someone shadowing Poppy. He promised if I even thought about saying a thing, he’d get to Poppy faster than anyone else would.”

  He nodded, his finger lazily tracing patterns over my hand. “I can see why that could be scary. But you could’ve talked to me in my office or written it down and slipped it to me. Told me why you were doing it.”

  “You mean I should’ve trusted you.”

  I hated the long silence. Atlas searched my face, and I didn’t know what he wanted to hear.

  “I’m sorry, Atlas.”

  “No. I get it. Why would you trust me? We kissed. We had a good time and—”

  “Wait a sec. I know what you’re about to do. I’ve heard this before. You’re about to say it was good while it lasted, even though we never had anything, just the start of something that could’ve been amazing. You’re gonna cut me loose, right?” I released a
humorless laugh. “You’ll promise to have people watch over me and Poppy, so nothing happens.” He didn’t say anything right away. “How close am I?”

  “Toby, I get it. I totally understand why you did what you did. And I want to just say fuck it, water under the bridge, and move on. But I can’t, I…” He sighed.

  “Because someone did one hell of a number on you once upon a time, you’re going to punish the world for it.” His golden eyes met mine. “Now, how close am I?”

  “Close.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Atlas

  Staring at Toby’s bruised face, seeing the pain he’d endured to right his wrongs, to save his sister, made me want to blurt it all out. Tell him everything about Joker so maybe he’d understand why I couldn’t be in a relationship built on lies. And why was I saying “relationship”? Because a part of you wants that again, but this time with someone who won’t break every part of who you are.

  “Atlas, you have no reason to trust me. I won’t even ask you to. But just know, if I had a choice, I would’ve never done this. If I thought I could have packed up me and Poppy and ran, I would’ve.”

  I didn’t want him to run away. “Toby, listen to me.” I inched closer and this time instead of just lightly touching his fingers, I took his hand in mine.

  “I want to tell you, explain myself. It’s weird—I’ve never wanted that. I told Ciro, Max, and Ledger, they saw what that life with Joker did to me.”

  “Tell me if you want, but I’ll never ask.”

  “I know. I appreciate that.” I could see cuts on his hand. I moved my inspection up his arm to his face, shattered. His shoulder was immobile, his breathing was okay, but I could tell it was hurting for him to take each breath. He didn’t need me walking away from him right then. He needed people who were going to help him, and if nothing more ever happened with Toby and me, it would be okay because he’d be safe.