Outremer III

by D. N. Carter

  “Thank you for being my parents. Promise me you will not forget me. I cannot sleep unless I know you won’t forget me,” Arri said, barely able to speak.

  “We can never forget you, my son…,” Paul said, trying to smile though his heart was breaking. He looked at Abi as she stood up. She shook her head very slightly no. He knew what she was saying and nothing would stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks.

  “No no no, Arri…you can stay here. Just stay awake until we can get you warm….please,” Alisha cried and stroked her fingers down his face. Ailia saw the hurt in her parents’ eyes and she buried her head into Stewart’s chest. “Please, Arri.”

  “Mama…is it because I am one of the best, like Nyla, was that why God has picked me now?” Arri asked, his voice barely a whisper.

  Tenno dropped his sword and fell to his knees just feet from Arri. Alisha quickly looked at him and saw the tears in his eyes.

  “Oh, my dear son, you are the very best, most beautiful in all of God’s gardens,” Paul said and rubbed his hand over Arri’s head and kissed him on his forehead.

  Arri opened his eyes again and looked directly at him, his eyes now wide, and his pupils large.

  “When I get to heaven, I will see Nyla…and I will tell God that he needs to come down here fast…because there are a lot of bad people who need sorting out,” Arri said directly to Paul. Alisha broke down uncontrollably, lowering her head. Nicholas had to turn away unable to watch any more as Tenno just sighed helplessly and started to sob. “Papa…I am not cold any more…and there are two women calling me…can I go now?”

  Alisha let out a long moan from the very depth of her being and clenched her hands tightly on Arri’s blanket. Paul raised Clip clop and tucked it against Arri’s chin just as he had done a thousand times before in his bed. Quickly Paul turned and reached out to pick up his sword. It was not just a weapon, he had been told before. Perhaps it would have the power to help keep Arri alive, he thought. In desperation he placed the handle near to Arri and tried to put his little fingers around the handle. Arri looked intently into Paul’s eyes. As a tear fell down Paul’s cheek, Arri smiled, blinked once more then closed his eyes for the last time. Alisha and Paul both felt the tension leave his little body as he died. Paul lowered his head against Arri’s head and closed his eyes. This wound was too deep to cope with, he thought. Alisha let out a slow low groan, not even a cry but the sound of a woman having her soul ripped from her. Paul moved his left arm and put it around her and they just remained there sobbing, the snow beginning to settle upon their backs. Tenno stood up, looked at Abi, the sadness etched deeply in his tear streaked face. He picked up his sword, turned around and just walked away slowly until he vanished from sight into the falling snow. Balian arrived just as the Knights of Lazarus along with Ishmael, Thomas, Mathew and Luke started to appear from the other direction. As soon as Balian saw Alisha and Paul crouched over Arri, he knew immediately things had not gone well. He shook his head. Abi opened her thick fur over jacket and took Ailia from Stewart and held her closely as she wrapped it around her, her little face buried in her chest. Paul stood up slowly and stared at Alisha holding Arri. He turned to look at Brother Matthew. He picked up his sword and slowly approached him as he lay in the snow.

  “Why?” Paul demanded pointing his sword directly at his throat.

  “I am already dead…so please, finish me quickly I beg of you…,” Brother Matthew replied and moved himself nearer to the blade.

  “Paul!” Abi called out and shook her head no.

  “Turansha has my family…they will be killed as I said…I did not wish to do this and I could not…but your son stabbed me as I was lowering my blade,” Brother Matthew explained then screwed up his face in pain. He started to pant, finding it difficult to breath. “My time is spent. I pray you will one day forgive me?”

  Paul stared at him hard, the tip of his sword just inches from his throat. He knew the lengths Turansha would go to and knew Brother Matthew was probably telling the truth. But Arri would not have known he was not going to kill them. Brother Matthew blinked his eyes, closed them and fell sideways briefly gurgling involuntarily as he died. As his face buried into the snow, the sense of anger filled Paul with an uncontrollable rage. He squeezed the handle on his sword until it started to feel hot. He looked at it and then to the parchment tube. In sheer desperation and anger he kicked the tube then pulled his sword back in both hands over his head and behind his back, then with all his might threw it forwards as hard as he could, immediately falling to his knees utterly broken. He did not even see the sword chop through the snow filled air until it thudded with a metallic clang into a nearby tree trunk. Percival appeared and looked at the sword as it stuck firm in the tree. After what seemed an age, Paul eventually looked up to see it just as he had seen in his dreams so many times before. He felt cursed. Abi kicked Paul in the side to get his attention. He looked back over his shoulder up at her. She indicated with her head to stand up.

  “Get up…you have others who still need you,” she stated bluntly.

  Filled with anger toward her now, Paul stood up fast and faced her. She unfurled her cloak to reveal Ailia resting asleep against her chest sucking her thumb. Paul’s heart sank even lower. With tears forming in his eyes again, he looked over to Alisha still cradling Arri just as Nicholas knelt beside her, placed his hand upon her back and lowered his head. Ishmael came into view and knelt beside them as Thomas turned away shaking his head in disbelief.

  Port of La Rochelle, France, Melissae Inn, spring 1191

  Sarah and Ayleth held each other crying as Gabirol sat in stunned silence, his quill dripping ink. Simon coughed uncomfortably as the Templar comforted Miriam as she wiped a tear away from her face.

  “I am sorry if this distresses you all,” the old man remarked and sat back in his chair.

  “Where the hell was Kratos when they really needed him?” Peter demanded to know, visibly shaken by what he had just heard.

  “Did that bastard Turansha evade them all then?” the Genoese sailor asked.

  “Why did the Muslim cavalry charge?” the Hospitaller asked.

  “They had been given their orders by Saladin. Turansha had overstepped the line too far this time and as he had promised, he sent a troop to assist Paul. When the Muslim commander and Balian had seen the two opposing sides, Paul’s greatly outnumbered, they had no other choice but to attack immediately. ’Tis the sort of instant decision I am sure you must have experience of,” the old man explained.

  “Aye that we have…decisions that can haunt you for a life time if they were the wrong one,” the Templar replied.

  “So little Arri…he had taken his mother’s dagger all along,” the farrier commented.

  The old man simply nodded yes.

  “And Turansha escaped?” Gabirol asked.

  “Yes he did…and as he made good his escape, all Alisha wished to do at that moment was to go to sleep and never wake up again,” the old man explained sadly.

  “Cannot blame her,” Miriam said.

  “Yes, but she still had Ailia to think of.”

  “So if Arri had not stabbed Brother Matthew, the sword would not have cut his neck?” Ayleth asked tearfully and sniffing.

  “We shall never know…but even without the cut to his neck, Arri was already too cold…in giving Ailia his padded jacket, he had without doubt sacrificed himself,” the old man said, quietly shaking his head.

  Ayleth started to cry more lowering her face into her hands. Sarah rubbed her shoulders comfortingly. The Templar looked at his brother and both sighed heavily.

  “We know that Paul you speak of did not return to Tiberias when the others did…only the woman and little girl. Pray tell what happened?” the Templar asked.

  The old man shifted himself uncomfortably in his chair and took a few minutes to compose himself enough to reply. He looked at Paul’s shield on the table.

  “This shield has far more holes than the number you just told u
s of. It figures Paul saw more combat,” the Hospitaller remarked.

  “In time…yes,” the old man answered. “And as you correctly revealed, Alisha could not bear to stay and bury Arri…so Abi, Nicholas, Upside and Balian returned to Tiberias with Alisha and Ailia along with Stewart, Ishmael and the Muslim cavalry contingent,” the old man explained and sighed before continuing. “Percival, Tenno and Taqi remained with Paul…to lay Arri to rest. Paul did not even get the chance to say farewell to Alisha for she was too distraught. Ailia did not want to leave his side, but with the worsening weather, she agreed she would leave with Abi protecting her. Paul did not wish to ever leave them again, but he had Arri to deal with.”

  “What of the parchments then?” Gabirol asked.

  “Stewart took charge of them and kept them on his person.”

  “Where did Paul bury him?” Sarah asked, choked.

  “It took some time before Abi was able to prise Alisha away from Arri. She sobbed uncontrollably as she kissed him farewell, her heart utterly torn in half. Every time she moved to leave, she fell at his feet again unable to say goodbye. It was the cold and exhaustion that finally made her succumb and allow Abi to put her on a horse. She did not say goodbye to Paul…she was broken.”

  “I am not sure I could either,” Miriam said quietly, the Templar squeezing her hand.

  “Paul kissed Ailia goodbye and as he held her little hands, he told her, swore to her, he would always come back no matter what as she was fearful she would not see him again,” the old man explained. “’Twas after they had left, Paul took Arri to an ancient site just outside the old ruined city of Gamla. Theodoric had told Paul about the place many times…and those of you who know your Bible would know of the place…Arri’s death affected Tenno deeply and Percival knew only too well how Paul was suffering.”

  “At least Paul still had Alisha and Ailia,” Simon remarked and blew out his cheeks.

  “Did he though?” the Genoese sailor asked.

  Simon frowned at him, puzzled by his statement.

  “Strange as it may sound now, even Theodoric sensed the tragedy that had befallen them. He awoke alarmed and shook Sister Lucy awake. She was well enough to travel and he simply told her they must go to Kerak…immediately…such was his intuition,” the old man explained and sighed again.

  “Kerak…why?” Peter asked.

  “Because that is where Alisha demanded that Abi take her…as far away from Turansha’s influence as possible.”

  “Without Paul…that is a bit selfish is it not?” Sarah asked.

  “Yes it was…but an understandable selfishness, and remember, Alisha was not herself. Grief affects people in different ways. She stayed but that single night with Princess Eschiva before leaving the next morn, direct for Kerak, whilst Paul carried out the sad task of laying Arri to rest as I said,” the old man sighed and wiped his face as a tear clearly rolled down his cheek.

  Chapter 66

  Betrayed & Broken – A Heart’s Memory

  Ruins of Gamla, Principality of Galilee, November 26th 1186

  Percival and Taqi stepped up out of the freshly dug grave and threw down their shovels. The snow had stopped falling but the whole landscape was blanketed in white. Paul looked around. The position was easy enough to find again in the future, he thought, the ruins of the former city below them looking serene, almost beautiful in the early morning sun, a million sparkles shining off the crisp snow. Tenno tied off the last stitch of the wound in Adrastos having removed the arrow successfully. With their horses tied securely to a derelict flour mill, the stone wheel still visible though covered in snow, the time had finally come for Paul to lay Arri in the earth. He looked at the little bundle secured across Percival’s horse of Arri’s body wrapped in the fur blanket Brother Matthew had put around him. Paul could hardly breathe as he unbuckled the straps. He gently lifted his little body and held him close across his chest. How could he leave him here? he thought and closed his eyes, resting his forehead against the blanket. Earlier he had placed Arri’s hands together across his chest, set the fur hat straight and kissed him one more time. After placing Clip clop inside resting against his chin as he had done a thousand times before bedtime, he broke down in tears. Unable to continue, he could not stitch the blanket together so Percival stepped in and completed it. Paul wanted to rip open the blanket to see his face just one more time, his heart breaking more painfully with every passing moment…but he knew he must not. In a daze he carried Arri to the grave, stepped down inside and gently lowered him. Tenno turned his back and could not watch. Taqi placed a reassuring hand on Paul’s shoulder as he knelt beside Arri, not moving. Paul could not catch his breath properly and took several minutes to calm himself down. He felt dizzy and could not stand. Suddenly the air was filled with the sound of several horses galloping up the winding track toward them. Tenno drew his sword as several black clad figures riding horses approached fast. Slowly Paul stood up praying it would be Turansha so he could finish him. Percival had recovered Paul’s sword from the tree but he had not wanted it back. It was now strapped to Percival’s horse too far away to reach before the men would be upon them. Taqi squinted as he focused his eyes. He recognised them instantly.

  “Fear not, my friends…’tis Al Rashid himself,” he said and moved to greet them as they pulled up their horses, Al Rashid immediately dismounting.

  Paul saw the twin triangle symbol embossed on his saddle, the same symbol Taqi wore as a pendant around his neck. Al Rashid removed his thick face cover and outstretched his arms. He knew he was too late to be of any help.

  “Forgive our intrusion this sad hour,” he said softly to Paul just as he looked up at him.

  “Master…,” Taqi said and bowed his head slightly at Al Rashid. Taqi looked behind him to see his other friend dismount. He nodded an acknowledgment.

  “Paul, I swear to you and Taqi this day, we shall avenge your son’s death,” Al Rashid said and offered his hand for Paul to take. Paul looked once more down at Arri, closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before opening them again. He took Al Rashid’s hand, his grip strong and firm, and stepped up out from the grave. “Turansha’s spies misled us to the other Gilgal. We are so sorry, Paul.”

  “You are not required to apologise. ’Twas all in the Lord’s hands…and not your fight anyway,” Paul replied sadly, finding it almost impossible to remain composed.

  “You are wrong…’Twas indeed our fight also. And for our failing, we shall escort you to wherever you wish to go,” Al Rashid said with a solemnity in his voice that took Paul by surprise. This giant of a man commanded much respect from friend and foe alike, yet he stood before Paul as a friend…a kind friend.

  “I shall never be the same person again after this…but I shall try to be the best person I can be, in honour of him,” Paul replied and looked back at Arri.

  “This pain will be the deepest cut…to the bone and very heart of your soul,” Al Rashid said still holding Paul’s hand. “But you must live…keep his memory alive always.”

  Paul’s mind flooded with a thousand images of Arri as if all at once running across his vision. He took a deep intake of breath again and steadied himself. He recalled the words Kratos had told him and Percival: ‘The tragedy of life is not death, but what we let die inside us while we live.’ Kratos had known all along this day would come, he thought to himself. The words of his mother who told him he would hold his son’s hand but a short while, but will hold him in his heart a life time repeated themselves over and over again. He wished he could silence the echoes of those words. Alisha still had the parchments but he could see them as clear as day in his mind. The green knight upon them he now knew without doubt was Percival. He looked across at him. The changes in his career, including the one that showed him follow a knight’s path, now looking ever more likely as he stood fully dressed as a knight just as they had foreseen. Suddenly all the horses started to buck, startled. A strange hum filled the air as a brilliant ball of light appe
ared a short distance away in the sky. All looked at it in surprise as it slowly moved toward them. Al Rashid shielded his eyes as he tried to focus upon it. Paul recognised the ball of light as being identical to the light that had hovered over Alisha on the boat when travelling to Tortosa years previously when she was pregnant with Arri. The ball of light, though very bright, did not hurt their eyes to look at. It stopped just short of Arri’s grave. A very fine mist seemed to fall from the light depositing a thin covering of white powder that looked more like a spider’s web over Arri’s wrapped body. Paul’s heart raced. Perhaps God had indeed heard his prayers and a miracle was about to happen. He fell to his knees as the others looked on perplexed. As Paul stared longer into the light, in his mind he thought he could see the outline of a female walking slowly toward him stepping out of it. Percival squinted his eyes seeing the same image for a fraction of a second. Paul put his hands together to pray. A female voice entered his mind but he could not see anyone clearly, just the very faint image of what looked like a female figure. As the voice grew clearer, he started to see a pair of eyes made up of many colours. Paul looked back at Al Rashid quickly.

  “They cannot see nor hear me, Paul. Only you and Percival,” the female voice said softly. Paul looked at Percival as he nodded he could nervously. “Take up your sword again for you will need it. Arri is with those who love him…and one day, the importance of this place where you have set his mortal remains will be a place where our type once again shall reveal ourselves and again walk among you. ’Tis a prophecy I now impart to you… for in the future, three shall again see of me, and they shall give prophecy of three.”

  Hearing that Arri was with people who loved him, Paul lowered his head and instinctively knew she was referring to Nyla and his own mother. He took a long and deep breath as if breathing again for the first time. When he looked up the figure appeared to back into the light. He blinked just once and the light simply vanished instantly.