Finally, after several minutes, I forced myself to take a few more steps, raised my hand, and knocked.
The last person I expected to see when the door opened was Mylos. I covered my heart with my hand and stared into his beautiful brown eyes.
“Hi.”
“Pia, come in.”
“I’m not intruding?”
He smiled, nearly melting my heart. “You’re an invited guest. You’d hardly be intruding.”
I took several deep breaths and followed him inside.
“Is your family at home?” I asked as he took my coat and hung it in the closet.
“They’re upstairs.”
“Oh.” I bit my bottom lip and winced.
“They’re giving us time.” He led me into the front sitting room. “Can I get you anything?”
“No, thank you.” I sat on the sofa and folded my hands in my lap, not remembering the last time I felt this nervous. Mylos sat in a chair across from me.
“How are you?” we both asked at the same time and then laughed.
“Go ahead.”
“No, you first, Pia.”
“I’m fine. I graduated.”
He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “I’m really proud of you.”
“Thank you. There were a lot of stops and starts—” I cut my sentence short when it dawned on me he might think I meant because of him. “My father had an accident.”
“I heard he passed away. I’m so sorry, Pia.”
“Thank you. It was for the best; he was in a lot of pain—” I did it again. I was trying too hard, and because of it, I was stumbling over my words. “I miss him very much.”
“How long are you in town?”
“Just a few days. You know, for the party tonight.”
He sighed. “Right. The party.”
“You’d rather not attend?”
He took a deep breath and blew it out. “I’d love to attend the celebration of my sister and her husband.”
“Everyone there would welcome you back anyway. Celebrate your return.”
“I’m not great at being the center of attention. At least not anymore.” He shook his head. “I’m not sure I ever was.”
I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. He looked so good compared to the last time I saw him. His hair, longer than I’d ever seen it, fell onto his forehead. His beard was longer too, covering the lower half of his face. His eyes, though, their warmth were my undoing. It was such a relief to see after how cold they’d been when I saw him in Germany. My chest ached just from looking at him. My fingers longed to feel him. My body craved his touch.
“Pia…the way you’re looking at me…”
My gaze drifted to the floor, and my cheeks heated in shame. “Forgive me,” I whispered.
“I thought I heard voices down here,” said Margaret, rushing into the room. I stood and we embraced. “I’m so happy to see you, Pia.”
“Me too,” I murmured.
Mylos’ father, John, hugged me too and then stepped back so Lily and I could embrace.
“Thank you so much for being here,” she whispered. “It means everything.”
“I wouldn’t have missed it.”
“Are you sure I can’t talk you into staying with Wills and me? Angus sleeps through the night now.”
“I appreciate it so much, but I brought work with me that I really must take care of early tomorrow morning.”
“Sounds like an excuse to me, but I’ll stop pestering you. I’m off now to go home and get ready, can I drop you at your hotel?”
“Pia, you don’t need to rush off so fast, do you?” asked Margaret.
“Mum, she’ll see you all tonight, and then she’ll be here for a few days.” Lily looked at me. “Right?”
“Yes. A couple.”
“Let her rest, and she’ll see you later.”
My eyes met Mylos’, and I raised my hand. He did the same. “See you later?”
He nodded.
“Let’s go, then,” said Lily, picking up my bag. She rushed out the front door and closed it the minute I stepped out.
“Stop.” I held up my hand, but not in the same way I had with Mylos. “Why are you in such a hurry?”
“I desperately need to talk to you.”
Lily didn’t say anything on the way to the hotel. In fact, it wasn’t until I’d checked in and asked the valet to take my bags to the room that she took my hand and led me over to an out-of-the-way alcove. When I sat in one of the chairs, she sat in the other and reached into her bag. She pulled out a zippered case.
“What is that?”
“This is what I need to talk to you about.”
I waited as she unzipped it. “These are all Miles’,” she said, pulling out pill bottles one by one.
“And? Why do you have them?”
“They’re all painkillers, Pia.”
I pressed my fingertips to my temples. “The pain he’s in must be unimaginable.”
“No. You’re not understanding. These are all very similar types of drugs.”
I reached forward and put my hand on Lily’s arm. “I know you must be very frustrated with me, but I don’t understand.”
“Miles is abusing painkillers. I think he may be addicted to opioids.”
I tried to process what she was telling me. It was a subject I knew little about and said so.
“I followed him up to his room and stood just outside the door. I saw him open one of these bottles and put a handful of pills in his mouth.”
“Okay…”
“Read what it says, Pia.”
I took the bottle from her hand. “One, every six hours. Up to four a day.” I looked into her eyes. “I see. But, Lily, did you take away all his medicine?”
She shook her head. “No. I left one bottle. There were plenty in it.”
I continued to rub my temples. There was a reason she was telling me this. I was unsure whether I wanted to know what it was. “What are you going to do?”
“I want you to help me talk him into getting help.”
Exactly what I was afraid of. “He won’t listen to me, Lily. We…I’m not sure…”
“What?”
“I don’t think Mylos and I are even friends anymore. If we ever were.”
Lily raised one eyebrow. “You’re far more than that, Pia. You’re the woman my brother loves.”
I went up to my room and lay down on the bed. The party didn’t start for another four hours, and I needed every minute to think.
I knew I was incapable of doing what Lily was asking of me. The man hadn’t wanted me to see him in the hospital, how would he react if I tried to butt my nose into his business? I knew nothing about what he went through, except what Lily had told me, and most of it, I didn’t want to hear.
Knowing how much pain he was in, how grueling his recovery had been and would continue to be, caused my own pain. My heart ached for him. But not only for his pain. My heart ached for him because even though I’d never admit to anyone—not even him—I loved Mylos.
When I thought about my future, or when my mother pestered me about when I was going to give in and marry Paolo, I could never see it happening.
I could never marry another man, knowing that in my heart, Mylos was my one true love. From the beginning, fate kept us apart, maybe to warn us we could never be. But my heart didn’t listen. Even if I never saw him again after tonight, I’d love him until the day I died. It would be unfair to let another man think he could own even a sliver of my heart.
I sat up when I heard a knock at my door and looked over at the time. I must’ve drifted off. The party would be starting in an hour, and I still had to get ready.
“Un momento,” I hollered, straightening my clothes and my hair as I walked toward the door. I opened it without looking, stunned for the second time today to see Mylos on the other side.
“What are you doing here?”
“I…um…never mind.”
“Wait!” I called
out as he rushed down the hallway toward the elevator. I followed, but the door closed behind him before I got there. I stalked back to my room with clenched fists only to find the door had closed behind me. I was locked out.
With a growl, I padded my way, barefoot, back to the elevator, drumming my fingers on my arm. I took it down to the main floor and walked over to the front desk. The line was ten deep.
I stood there, just having rolled out of bed, no shoes on my feet, fuming.
“Damn you, Mylos,” I muttered under my breath as I impatiently waited for the line to move. A couple who had been at the front, turned and walked toward me. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
“Paolo?”
“Pia? What are you doing here?”
“I’m in town to visit a friend.”
“What a funny coincidence,” he said, running his hand through his hair. The woman hanging on his arm appeared unamused.
“Hello,” I said, looking directly at her, even though she refused to make eye contact with me; she was too busy looking at my toes.
“Sorry. Pia, this is Donnatella. Donnatella, Pia.”
“Hello,” I said a second time. She gave me an icy nod, but didn’t speak. Perhaps she was mute.
“What are you doing here?” Paolo asked a second time, looking down at my feet like the woman hanging on him had.
“As I said, I’m in town to visit a friend.”
“No, I mean in the lobby.”
I squared my shoulders. I had no reason to be embarrassed in front of these people, but I was. “It’s a long story, but I was locked out of my room.”
Donnatella shifted her hand so the light would hit what had to be a ten-carat diamond ring.
“Congratulations,” I said, looking back at Paolo. “When is the big day?”
“Not for a few months,” he answered, sheepishly.
“Well, congratulations again.”
“It was nice to see you.”
I breathed out a sigh of relief when he walked away, only to tense up when I heard him say my name again. “Is there anything I can do? Talk to the manager?”
I looked over to where his fiancée stood scowling at me.
“I’m perfectly capable of talking to the manager myself, Mylos—I mean, Paolo.”
He leaned forward and kissed my cheek.
“What was that for?”
“I miss you, Pia, more than you know. Ciao!”
“Whatever,” I mumbled, turning around to see the line hadn’t moved forward at all. I looked at the large clock above the concierge desk. The party would begin in a half hour, and I wouldn’t be there.
I turned back toward the front desk when I saw the man beneath the clock stand. “Can I help you with something, miss?” He too looked down at my bare feet.
“Yes. I was locked out of my room.”
“Come. You don’t have to wait in line.”
“Grazie.” I would still be late, but not quite as late as I would’ve been had I been forced to wait.
11
Grinder
“Have you heard from Pia?” my sister asked.
“No. Why would I have?”
“I don’t know.” She checked the time. “She’s late.”
“Ring her.”
“You could ring her.”
“Lily, you’re the one who’s worried about why she’s late. You ring her.”
She studied me with scrunched eyes. “Did something happen?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You’re acting funny.”
I put my arm around my sister’s shoulders and led her far enough away that no one could hear us speaking. “I’m acting funny? Do you want to tell me what you did with my medication?”
“It’s in a safe place. And, I spoke with Carson—”
“Bloody hell, Lily. What the fuck do you think—”
“Problem?” asked Wills, coming up behind me.
“Ask your wife.” I stormed off, seriously considering leaving when I saw her walk in. It was one of those moments when time seemed to stand still. When Pia’s eyes met mine, everyone—everything—in the room faded to nothing as she slowly made her way toward me. God, she was gorgeous. The word itself paled in the face of her.
Her long, flowing gown was the same color as the stone I was never without. The closer she got, the more tempted I was to fall to my knees and beg her to forgive me, beg her to love me. Instead, I stood where I was, anxious to hear what she would say, but then I couldn’t wait. “You’re late.”
I took a step closer so I could breathe in the glorious scent of her as I reached into my pocket and fingered the heart-shaped stone. I ran the tip of my digit over its facets, softly stroking it like I would the folds of her pussy—if only I was capable of being with her in that way.
“It’s your fault, Mylos.” Her breath hitched as I stared into her eyes. The music began to play; I held out my hand, and she took it.
“Dance with me, Pia.” I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her body close to mine. As we floated around the ballroom floor, I rested my cheek against her hair.
“You are just as beautiful—more beautiful—than the day I first saw you outside the window of the farmhouse.”
She touched my cheek with the tip of her index finger. “You are beautiful too, Mylos.”
“Beautiful? There’s so much more to a man than his beauty, Pia.”
She laughed as I repeated the words she’d said to me when we met in the village near Valentini.
“There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”
“Sì?”
“Why is it called Antica Cascina dei Conti di Valentini when your last name is Deltetto?”
“Valentini was handed down from my mother’s side of the family. She is the Countess Valentini.”
“Wow. I had no idea. Is that unusual?”
“As you said, you have no idea.”
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“What’s wrong, Pia?”
“I don’t know how to act around you.”
From the corner of my eye, I saw my sister watching us.
“Why did you come to my room earlier? Which, by the way, is why I was late. When I followed you, I locked myself out.”
I slowly closed my eyes and opened them. “I’m sorry.”
“What happened next bothered me more.”
I leaned back to look into her eyes. “What happened?”
“I was standing in the hotel lobby, barefoot like a zingara—gypsy—and ran into Paolo.”
“Paolo? I’d forgotten all about him.”
“Yes, well, I had the good fortune to meet his fiancée, who was not so thrilled to meet me.”
“Any woman would be jealous of you, Pia.”
“I could understand why: me with no shoes on, very threatening.”
I smiled when she did. “I am sorry you had to experience someone unpleasant because of me.”
She tapped my shoulder with her hand. “I appreciate your apology, Mylos, but I would much prefer an answer to my question.”
“It’s not an easy thing to explain.”
She was quiet as I continued to move her around the dance floor.
“We didn’t get much of a chance to talk when you arrived at my parents’ place. There was more I wanted to say.”
“Say it now.”
“I want you to understand I don’t want your pity, Pia. Now or then.”
“Then?”
“When you came to Germany.”
“And you were certain I would pity you?”
“Let’s say it became my expectation.”
“I understand.”
“What happened to me…There were times, there are times…I don’t feel like myself anymore.”
She put her hand on my heart and brushed my lips with hers. That brief contact filled me with warmth that quickly turned to something akin to dread. I couldn’t allow myself to kiss her. If I did, I’d want more, and I was
n’t capable of more.
I saw Edge walk in and nodded to his wave.
“That’s your friend. I met him in Germany, but I don’t remember his name.”
“His name is Keon, but everyone calls him Edge.”
“He is a good friend to you.”
“He’s my best mate. Has been so since our days at Sandhurst.”
“Was he there?”
Pia’s voice was soft, and I knew she didn’t mean at the Royal Military Academy. “Yes, he was.”
“It must have been so difficult for him.”
She was right, and it was something I didn’t acknowledge often enough. My head was filled to capacity with how awful it had been for me, and I rarely thought about the pain of others. Every so often, I’d see the light, but most of the time, I was mired down in my own darkness.
“He feels guilty. It’s common among those who serve. Most call it survivor’s guilt. In this case, I survived, but there were others there that day who did not.”
Pia stopped dancing and took a step back. “Excuse me…I’m sorry.” She rushed away, and I followed.
“Let her go,” said Edge as I was about to blow by him. “Give her a minute. She’ll be back.”
I shrugged off the hand he’d put on my arm. “How do you know?”
“I just do.” A waiter walked past us with a tray of Champagne. Edge grabbed two glasses and handed one to me. “Welcome back, ya wanker.”
“Thanks.” We toasted.
“Z Alexander has been asking about you.”
“Why would the head of SIS ask about me?”
“Maybe because you were trained to eventually work for him.”
“Not going to happen.”
Edge took my glass and set it and his on a nearby table. “Let’s find a real drink, yes?”
I led him over to the bar, where we both ordered an Irish and a pint.
“There’s a job at MI5 when you’re ready.”
“It isn’t something I ever see myself capable of doing.”
“Capable? Of course you’re capable.”
I pushed the shot glass across the bar, and the man behind it poured me another. “Drop it, Edge. I’m not interested.”
He stared at me with an open mouth. “You’re twenty-six years old, and it’s the only thing you’ve been trained to do. What do you plan to do instead?”
Grinded (The Invincibles Book 3) Page 8