THE TRUE LOVE SERIES BOX SET: A Christian Romance

by Duncan, Juliette

  “I used to go camping often when I was in scouts, but I haven’t been since then.” He flashed an accusing look at his father. “Dad doesn’t like camping.”

  “That’s not true. I’ve just never been.” Ben’s face reddened.

  Tessa slipped her hand into his. “But we’re going next weekend. And we’re going to have a great time, aren’t we?” She gazed up into his eyes, willing him to be encouraging for Jayden’s sake.

  Ben drew in a slow breath. “Yes, we’re going to have a great time.” His voice sounded a little strained, but at least he was trying.

  As they said their good-byes a short while later, Eleanor took Tessa’s hands in hers. “I have no doubt you’ll be a wonderful mother. Seems like just yesterday I was welcoming you into the world, but now you’re all grown up with a family of your own and it’s your turn to bring a daughter or son into the world.” Her eyes moistened, and Tessa’s eyes blurred with tears of her own. “Being a mother is exhausting and wonderful—the greatest thing that can happen to you, but it can also be the most challenging. I have no doubt God will give you all the grace, strength, and wisdom you’ll need to love and raise your child the way he wants you to.” Her mother’s voice was warm and soft, and she had a tear in her eye. She reached out and brushed a stray hair from Tessa’s forehead. “I’ll be praying for you at every stage of your journey, honey. You can count on that.”

  Fresh tears pricked Tessa’s eyes as her mother hugged her tightly and planted a big kiss on her cheek.

  “Thanks Mum, I appreciate that.” Tessa smiled into her mother’s watery eyes, her voice catching in her throat. “And I’ll look forward to that shopping trip.” She squeezed her hand before letting go and climbing into the front passenger seat beside Ben.

  Chapter 17

  Eleanor’s words weighed on Tessa’s mind all the way home. “If it’s causing problems between you and Ben, don’t go…” She glanced at Ben in the driver’s seat. The day out had done him good. He seemed more relaxed, despite the prospect of the camping trip and Jayden’s disappointing performance that morning. But if she mentioned Michael’s name, tension would reappear, and she didn’t want that at all. The more she thought about it, the more she believed she would need to put aside her desire to see Michael for the benefit of her marriage. But Michael still needed a response. It was unfair to leave him hanging like she had, and as he was due to arrive this week, time was running out.

  Long shadows extended to the other side of the road by the time they arrived home. Ben and Jayden unpacked the camping gear and stacked it on several shelves in the carport, ready to be repacked the following weekend. Jayden disappeared into his room, and Ben was keen to watch the football game on television between the Brisbane Broncos and the North Queensland Cowboys, as long as she didn’t mind. She didn’t mind at all. It gave her the perfect opportunity to draft an email to Michael.

  She knew the contents of Michael’s email by heart. Countless times she’d pictured him sitting on a chair as he wrote it, full of hope that she might be willing to rekindle their friendship. Now she had to dash his dreams. God, I feel so bad. I don’t know what to write, please help me. She drew in a deep breath and, placing her fingers on the keyboard, began.

  ‘Dear Michael,

  Please forgive me for not replying to your welcome email sooner. I was so glad to hear about your successful rehabilitation, and even gladder to hear about your re-commitment to the Lord.’

  She paused, reading over what she’d just written. Did it sound too stuffy and formal? Probably—but best to keep going or I’ll never finish it.

  ‘I do have news to tell you of my own. I have no idea of your sister’s motivation for not telling you herself, as she is obviously aware of it. I can only think she wanted to cause strife for me as she’s never held any great love for me, especially after you and I parted ways. Michael, I have to tell you that I’m now married. I hope that doesn’t come as too much of a shock. I know you were hoping to rekindle our friendship, but at this early stage in my marriage, I don’t believe I can be more than someone you once knew, and possibly loved.

  What we had was wonderful while it lasted, and I have many treasured memories of our time together. When I think back to our happy times, it makes the unhappy times so much sadder. I’ll never forget the day of your accident, the day everything changed. You were in so much pain, and my heart went out to you as you lay in that hospital bed with goodness knows how many tubes and monitors poking into and out of you. And the devastating news that you might never be able to do any active sports again. I know how difficult that was for you, as our lives were filled with so many fun activities, and the prospect of never being able to scuba dive or ski again, or even ride your bike, I think probably caused you to get hooked on those drugs. They not only eased your physical pain, but also helped you forget about your loss.

  I tried to understand that at the time, but maybe I wasn’t mature enough to know how to really help you. I thought it was just a simple matter of accepting the situation, praying about it and getting on with life, but now I realise that emotional healing often takes longer, and I needed to be more patient and caring. I’m sorry I failed you, I truly am. However, what happened can’t be undone. It can only be remembered as a time when we both struggled, and sadly ended with us parting ways. I hope you’ll forgive me for choosing to go my own way, and for leaving you to deal with your problems on your own. At the time, I felt I could do nothing more, despite praying for your healing and hoping God would help you get off those drugs.

  I guess you’re wondering who I married. Before I tell you, let me assure you it took a long time for me to face life again without you. Just ask Stephanie! She often had to drag me out of bed to go to work, and so often I wanted to call you and say I was sorry I’d broken it off, but I didn’t, and I slowly rebuilt my life without you in it. And then, one day, actually, it was one night, when I was at puppy training (yes, I now have a dog—I found him in the car park at work and brought him home), I met this wonderful man. I was hesitant to get involved at first, mainly because he’s a bit older than me and has a teenage son, but we slowly fell in love. He’s a deep thinker, and was suffering from depression when we met after his wife walked out on him, but he’s a Christian and he’s a deeply caring man, and I love with all my heart. We married in January, and moved into a new house in New Farm—all three of us. Can you imagine me as a step-mother to a teenager? I couldn’t for a long time, but God has given me a real love for Jayden, and even though we struggle in our relationship sometimes (often, if I’m honest), I think we’re doing all right.’

  She paused again. Should I tell him I’m pregnant? She tapped the desk and inhaled slowly, and eventually decided against it. No need.

  ‘I can’t say enough how happy I am that your rehab was successful. But what makes me happier still is your re-commitment to the Lord. I pray that in the weeks and months to come, your faith will grow stronger every day, and you’ll find peace and fulfilment in your life because Jesus is living in your heart. No doubt there will be dark days when temptation comes your way, but stay strong in the Lord and don’t give in. When you’re weak, then He is strong. Pray often and immerse yourself in the Word, and surround yourself with others who love Jesus. I’m sorry I’m sounding like a preacher—I don’t mean it to sound like that. In fact, I’ve just re-read what I wrote, and I need to take my own advice!

  Anyway, in conclusion, I just want to say that I wish you all of God’s best for the future. I pray that He’ll lead and guide you, and that you will find direction in your life. I hope that one day we can meet again, but until then, please be assured of my deep affection.

  Tessa’

  Tessa exhaled slowly and closed her eyes as she leaned back in her chair. Was she ready to hit the send button? How would Michael react when he received it? Had she come on too heavy? She took a deep breath. God, please bless this email, and prepare Michael’s heart. Wrap him in your love, and protect him from the d
isappointment he might feel when he receives it. And Lord, please help him to grow strong in you, and become the man of God you want him to be. And lastly, Lord, please help me to grow closer to you, too. I’m sorry for my stubbornness and the way I’ve treated Ben just because I wanted my own way. Please forgive me. Amen.

  She straightened herself and without any more ado, hit the ‘send’ button.

  Tessa was sure Michael would always hold a special place in her heart, but Ben was the love of her life, the one she’d promised God she’d love through sickness and health, through bad times and good, and now she needed to tell him she wasn’t going to see Michael.

  Chapter 18

  Tessa stretched and glanced at the clock. She’d been at her computer longer than she thought. Strange the boys hadn’t been calling for dinner. She closed her computer down and ran her hands over her tummy. A sense of warmth and God’s peace settled over her now she’d done what she knew was the right thing.

  When she stepped into the living room, Ben was asleep on the couch looking very peaceful. The football game had finished and the news was on. She tip-toed to the television to lower the volume, but just as she reached it, Ben stirred. She turned around and smiled at him. “Enjoy the game, sweetie?”

  Clearing his throat, he pulled himself upright and yawned. “Ah, yes, it was a close game.” His brows pinched as he peered at his watch. “How long have I been asleep?”

  “Not long. The news has just started. Is Jayden still in his room?”

  Ben glanced up the stairs. “As far as I know. He said he needed to study, but that was a while ago.”

  “Are you sure he’s studying?” Tessa arched her brows as she joined Ben on the couch.

  He placed his arm around her and kissed her cheek. “That’s what he said. I don’t think he’d lie.”

  “I’m not saying he’s lying, but there are a thousand other things for kids to do on the computer besides studying. It might be worth checking.”

  “I guess you’re right. I’ll go check in a minute.” He straightened and began gently massaging her shoulders. “So what has Mrs. Williams been up to while her husband has been lazing in front of the television?”

  She sighed. How much should she tell him? No doubt he’d be happy about her decision not to see Michael, but the finality of it all still saddened her a little. She wondered if Michael had already read the email, and as she did, her heart raced at she thought of him opening it. God, I’ve already prayed about this, but please wrap your arms around Michael right now. It’s going to be such a shock for him. Ben began massaging her neck, and she remembered he was waiting for an answer. She breathed in slowly and squeezed her hands together. “I sent an email to Michael.”

  Ben stopped his massaging and his body stiffened. “What did you say?” The tone of his voice suggested he was expecting the worst.

  She turned her head and met his gaze. For a long moment they remained that way, neither of them moving or breathing. She inhaled deeply. “I told him I won’t be able to see him.”

  Ben’s body visibly relaxed. He took her hand. “I’m so glad you made that decision. I’d been wondering, and hoping.”

  “I’m sorry I took so long.” She squeezed his hands. “You deserved an answer long before now, but it’s done now. I won’t be seeing him.”

  “What made you decide?” Ben’s voice had softened, and as he gazed into her eyes, she knew she’d made the right decision. Ben might not be as fun loving as Michael had been, but he was solid and steady, and he loved her deeply. Her heart warmed as he brushed his finger slowly along her brow.

  “I realised how much you mean to me, and how selfish of me to want to see him.” She paused and drew a deep breath. “I should have made the decision straight away instead of toying with the idea for so long. I think I was being just a little stubborn, too. I’m so sorry.”

  A moment of silence passed between them. Tessa’s heart beat faster when Ben lifted her chin and caressed her face as he did.

  “I was so scared of losing you.” His voice caught in his throat.

  Tears pricked her eyes and tumbled down her cheeks.

  Ben wiped them gently with his thumbs, and then pulled her closer until their lips met in a kiss that left her in no doubt of his love and forgiveness.

  * * *

  Half an hour later, Ben went up to Jayden’s bedroom to tell him dinner was ready. Instead of hearing the rock music that would normally be playing, all was quiet. When he opened the door, Jayden jumped at the sudden interruption.

  “What are you up to?” Ben stepped closer and tried to look, but it was too late. Jayden slammed his MacBook Air shut.

  “Studying.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. We’ve got a big algebra test next week. Most of the class is still struggling with some of the formulae, so the teacher set up a group on Facebook that lets us chat with one another if we need help.”

  “Sounds like a good idea.” Ben ruffled his hair. “Well, come on down. Dinner’s ready and Tess is waiting.”

  Jayden jumped off his bed and followed his father downstairs to the dining room.

  * * *

  Miles away in sunny Palm Beach, Florida, Kathryn hugged her knee-length cashmere sweater closer to her body and made herself more comfortable on her daybed. She stared at the Facebook message screen on the notebook computer, tapping the keyboard impatiently as she waited for Jayden to respond. After a few minutes of waiting, she typed: ‘Are you still there?’

  Again receiving no response, she closed out of the screen and looked at the wall clock. It was easy to forget they were in different time zones. While it was early morning in Florida, it was night-time in New Farm, Queensland. Either Ben or his new wife must have made Jayden go to bed. She didn’t know whether to be happy or sad about Ben remarrying. She couldn’t be angry. After all, she’d been the one to leave him for Luke Emerson.

  Luke. The wealthy play boy golf legend who’d left her starstruck after their initial meeting, sweeping her off her feet and into a new, glamorous lifestyle she thought would only come true in her wildest dreams. He’d showered her with affection and attention and made her feel more special than she’d ever felt in all the years she’d been married to Ben. But that affection had been waning of late. Luke was playing a golf tournament in Ireland and she hadn’t been invited. Sure, they’d had their little spats before, but this was the first time he’d left to play without taking her to watch him and to be by his side for the media photo ops afterwards.

  She sighed and rested her cheek in her palm as she stared out of the floor to ceiling windows looking out onto the magnificent Mediterranean estate. When she’d first seen it, the size of the grounds and the grand opulence had blown her mind. When they moved in, Luke laughed with her as they ran around like children exploring the estate. Not a very grown up or mature thing to do, but they didn’t care. The lake sitting between the front entrance and the house gave only a hint of what was to come. In the back their private beach beckoned them. A private beach! How many people have one of those? Italian style Loggias framed a courtyard containing fountains, two pools and a Spanish garden. A seven-car garage topped it off. And that was just the outside.

  She suddenly grew morose. How she wished she could wind the clock back. She wanted to be close to Luke again. To have him hold and kiss her like he used to. To look at her with nothing but love in his eyes.

  A maid called her name and she snapped out of her reverie, turning away from the sunlit window. One of the five Spanish maids stood in the doorway with tea, a sponge cake and the morning paper. “Thank you, Camila.” Kathryn took the acacia wood tray. “Just what I need.”

  “You’re welcome.” Camila’s soft, caring voice always amazed her. “Are you all right, Ma’am? You don’t look your normal self.”

  “I didn’t sleep very well last night, so I guess I’m just a little tired.”

  Camila smiled warmly and nodded. “Well, if that’s all, I’ll leave you now, b
ut let me know if there’s anything else I can get for you. And perhaps you should take a nap later.”

  “I think I will, thank you.” Kathryn appreciated the consideration the maids showed her even though she was only Luke’s girlfriend and not his wife. She often wondered what it was like to live one’s whole adult life as a servant to someone else. She couldn’t imagine herself as a maid. After one week she’d become bored with the work and want to move on to more exciting things. Like lazy luncheons with other high society women that often stretched into the evening.

  She took a sip of the hot orange spiced tea and lapsed back into thinking of Luke. Lately, she’d been pressuring him to marry her, but he always responded with the same lame excuse, “I’m not ready to settle down, Kathryn.” Maybe that was why he hadn’t taken her with him to Ireland. He didn’t want her pestering him about marriage when he had an important game to play. She sighed, a heavy weight sitting in her chest as she bit into the sponge cake. If he’s not ready now, will he ever be?

  Opening the thick newspaper, she flipped to the sports section. She scanned through the soccer scores, but stopped to look through the golf stories in full. There was a feature about Luke. She gasped and nearly dropped her tea cup as she stared at the picture of him and a blonde bombshell hanging on his arm as they left some sort of club. The photo was slightly blurred, like many she’d been captured in as the paparazzi snapped away at them whenever they were out in public. Despite the blurriness, Luke’s features were unmistakable.

  Kathryn’s eyes watered as she swallowed the lump in her throat. This can’t be happening. She squeezed her eyes shut and pressed a shaking hand to her forehead. When she opened her eyes, the photo still stared back at her. She put her tea cup down, snatched up the paper, and flung it across the room, her heart racing with anger.