Undoing

by L. L. Diamond

  Lalande cocked her head and looked at him with raised eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

  Fitzwilliam wrapped an arm around her. “Let us get you back to bed.”

  He propped her up much as he had Thomas nearly a month ago, but Elizabeth doubled over again. This time, she collapsed to her knees and she rocked back and forth on all fours right where she had once stood in the dressing room.

  His chest heavy, Fitzwilliam pulled her nightgown over her rear and clenched his teeth. “I can see the babe’s head, Lizzy.” He wanted to yell and insist how he knew this would happen, but this was not the best time. “We need to shift her to her back,” he said to Lalande.

  Her maid helped him coax Elizabeth to change positions once the pain subsided. When she lay propped in Lalande’s lap, he ran his hand through his hair once more. “What if I do something to hurt him? You can be the most wilful and stubborn. . .” He had to stop. No matter how frustrated he was at her hard-headed demands, he would only upset her if he continued.

  He rested his hand on her belly, which tightened when the next contraction began. “Push,” he said insistently. What else should he do? If he had known Elizabeth would do this, he might have read a physician’s book on childbirth, but how could he have foreseen she would take leave of her senses?

  “Push, Madame.” Lalande reached to a shelf behind her and opened a bottle that she wafted under Elizabeth’s nose. “Lavender oil,” she said.

  Elizabeth bore down, her face screwed up in concentration and pain before she panted when the pain let up. The baby’s head had moved dramatically with her effort, the top ready to emerge. With the next, she bore down again, her face contorting and her lips pressing tightly together to keep from crying out. She took a deep breath and pushed again when it was required.

  His eyes shifted from her face to where the babe’s head not only emerged but gradually rotated to its side, his eyes squeezed closed. He pushed her gown further up, and when the contraction ended, he rubbed the top of Elizabeth’s thigh. “Lizzy, look.”

  Her maid helped her sit up a bit further and Elizabeth let out a sob when she set eyes upon her child. Lalande caught his eye. “You need to free his shoulder.”

  His stomach flipped, and he held up shaking hands. “How?”

  “The midwife inserts her hand at the top and guides it down. The last time I attended a birth, the midwife showed me.”

  “You should be down here for this.” He muttered the words but the slight curve to one side of the maid’s lips indicated she had heard him.

  He held his breath when Elizabeth bore down and he did as Lalande suggested. In the end, the manoeuvre proved easier than he had anticipated since the babe slipped right out into his hands.

  “Put him on Madame.” Lalande placed a towel over Elizabeth’s nightgown, and he lay the child upon it as the maid began scrubbing it vigorously. After a tense moment or two where Elizabeth’s eyes widened, and she rubbed just as furiously as Lalande, the babe began squalling at the top of his lungs.

  “The entire household will know soon,” said the maid with a huge smile. “Have you noticed, Madame?” She lifted the towel, so they both could see. “You have a son.”

  Elizabeth started to cry as he collapsed back onto his heels. A son. Everything Thomas wanted, he now had—except for his health. At least he would know his estate was secure before he passed from this life. Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth would ensure the dukedom prospered until this child was old enough to take on the responsibility himself.

  A groan came from Elizabeth, and Lalande looked up at him. “The afterbirth needs delivering. If you can move here and support her, I can manage the rest.”

  Still unsteady, he shifted so Elizabeth reclined against his chest. Lalande bustled around the room, gathering items before she sat at Elizabeth’s feet. She used a bit of ribbon to tie the cord and cut him from his mother which prompted him to wail once more.

  “Put him to your breast, Madame.”

  He fumbled to help her untie and pull her shift from her shoulder so she could offer the child her nipple. The babe latched on and began suckling as if he had not eaten in weeks.

  Fitzwilliam dropped his forehead against her shoulder. “Pray, do not ever do this to me again.”

  “What? Bear your child?”

  “No,” he said with a growl. “Insist I deliver it. This had to be the most terrifying experience of my life.”

  She winced and tensed before she let out a long breath. “I honestly thought the lying-in would be longer. I did not know he would be in such haste to be born.”

  “Madame, I have no warm water, but we should at least change you to a fresh nightgown.” Mindful of the nursing baby, Lalande helped Elizabeth peel off the shift, sliding it down her legs, so he could move her to the rug rather than have her remain on the damp floor.

  Once Lalande had Elizabeth dry and ready, he lifted the two most precious beings in the world into his arms and carried them into the bedchamber, placing Elizabeth delicately on the mattress. She beamed at him while the babe suckled from the other breast. “He is so beautiful.”

  He sat next to her and covered the top of their son’s head with his palm. “He is.” His lips caressed her temple. “I should go. The footman stationed in the hallway surely heard him cry. Someone will knock soon, and Lalande needs to request warm water to clean the two of you.”

  She placed a hand to his face. “You will return, will you not?”

  Lalande hurried in and knocked on the door connecting Elizabeth’s chamber to that of Thomas’s. After a moment, Colin answered. He was already dressed and peered around her, his eyes the size of horse chestnuts. “Thomas swore he heard a babe.”

  “I heard the floor squeak in the servants’ passage,” she said with haste. “You must let Mr. Darcy inside.”

  Fitzwilliam kissed Elizabeth’s lips quickly as he stood. “When Lalande and Colin feel it is safe, I shall return.” Without further instruction, he hurried into Thomas’s room while Lalande gathered his remaining clothes and pushed them into Colin’s arms.

  No sooner had the door closed behind him than a knock vibrated from Elizabeth’s bedchamber door. He leaned back against the hard oak and closed his eyes. That had been too close.

  “Fitzwilliam?”

  He turned his head towards Thomas’s croak, straightened, and stepped over to the bedside, sitting in the chair stationed there. “’Tis a boy. They are both well. Elizabeth was positively infuriating. She claimed she would not deliver for hours, which made it necessary for me and Lalande to act the part of midwife.”

  Thomas coughed instead of laughing. “Elizabeth can be headstrong,” he said when he caught his breath.

  “The house will be a flurry of activity for some time,” said Colin. “I shall order breakfast sent here for you and put it about below stairs that you spent the night sitting by your cousin’s bedside. In the meantime, you should dress in your cousin’s dressing room and depart through that door.” He pointed towards the family corridor. “Your valet can put you to rights before you return. When it is safe to go to the mistress, you can do so easily without arousing suspicion from this bedchamber. As far as the household is concerned, you are spending a great deal of time with your ill cousin.”

  Two hours passed before he laid eyes upon Elizabeth again. During their separation, the harried midwife, who had rushed over when called, had apparently scolded her for waiting so long that her maid had to deliver the child, not to mention barking strict orders for her to lie in a darkened room and remain abed. If Elizabeth listened to one word, it would be a miracle.

  Mrs. Hamilton, scandalized by Elizabeth nursing the babe herself, insisted duchesses did not feed their own children. Elizabeth, however, brooked no opposition to her wishes. Mrs. Hamilton, much to her surprise, was summarily threatened with her immediate release if she did not eject the wet nurse from the manor without delay. When Thomas stood behind Elizabeth’s decision, Mrs. Hamilton relented, though not without exce
ssive grumbling, according to Lalande, who was privy to the woman’s rantings below stairs. Based on Elizabeth’s expression at the news, Mrs. Hamilton would likely not keep her position for long.

  “Help me up,” said Elizabeth as soon as he entered.

  “You must be joking. The midwife indicated you should remain abed.”

  She rolled her eyes and shifted to the edge while she removed her blankets. “My aunt has never remained abed for weeks on end in a darkened room, and she is as well as anyone.”

  Her manner made it clear that she intended to ignore him, so he aided her to stand, ensuring the babe was secure in her arms. Regardless of her stability, he kept a supportive arm around them both. “Where are we going?”

  “Thomas’s bedchamber.”

  Colin called for them to enter at his knock, and once Elizabeth sat on the edge of the bed, she touched Thomas’s hand. When he opened his eyes, they immediately became shiny and filled with tears. “He is big,” he breathed.

  “Not so very,” she said pressing the blankets back from his chubby cheeks. She glanced at Fitzwilliam and back to Thomas. “He needs a name, but we never discussed your wishes.”

  Colin stepped forward. “Thomas discussed names with me.” He nodded at Thomas, who blinked in return. Colin often spoke for Thomas recently, saving his long-time companion the effort. “In our discussions, he planned to request your preferences.”

  She glanced at Fitzwilliam then back to Thomas. “We discussed Alexander. What do you think?”

  Fitzwilliam held his breath while he watched the floor. She remembered their early morning discussion from that last night in London. Elizabeth had hoped for Nathaniel, but he wanted Alexander. She was deferring her preference for his.

  “Thomas always intended you to select his forename,” said Colin. “He selected the middle names as long as they met with Mr. Darcy’s approval.”

  Fitzwilliam’s head lifted, and he furrowed his brows. Why should he have approval? Despite their actual situation, Thomas did not need to defer to him at all.

  “With your selection in mind, Thomas’s preference for the name is Alexander George Darcy Osborne. Does that suit?” Colin’s eyes moved from one to the other while Elizabeth gasped.

  How ironic that a child his father would not approve of should bear his name. Fitzwilliam rubbed his forehead while he watched Thomas, who lifted his eyebrows. The name settled him to an extent. While the child would always be an Osborne, the remainder of his name signified who he was in truth. He was a Darcy.

  “In honour of your father,” croaked Thomas. “This is his grandchild.”

  “And leaves you the ability to name a subsequent child George in honour of your father should you wish it,” said Colin. “He will be called Alexander.”

  Fitzwilliam nodded and exhaled. He would not reject the gift Elizabeth and Thomas now gave him. “Thank you. I think it a fine name.” Why did it seem this situation would never become less complicated? Would a day come where he could simply live with Elizabeth and not be concerned of every possible thing that could go horribly amiss?

  1Sir Walter Scott. The Lady of the Lake. https://www.gutenberg.org/files/3011/3011-h/3011-h.htm#link2H_4_0006

  Chapter 18

  July 13th 1810

  Worthstone

  Derbyshire

  Dearest Jane,

  Please forgive me the delay in penning this letter. The last few days have been a flurry of activity, yet I do not have the time to tell you all.

  Firstly, you are an aunt! Alexander George Darcy Osborne entered this world in the early hours of July 11th. He is strong and a voracious eater thus far, but such a blessing. He sleeps and eats well and the physician who checked him yesterday is pleased with his condition and his progress since his birth.

  I do not know how much you know, but not long before Alexander’s birth, Thomas summoned Mr. Darcy to Worthstone due to his declining health. Thomas’s condition is continuing to deteriorate. Since Alexander’s birth, he has refused all food and all liquids and mostly sleeps. Mr. Darcy has informed me of his wish that you and your husband convey his sister to Worthstone so she might say goodbye. With your excellent heart, I know you will do so swiftly. I thank you. I know Thomas would wish to see Georgiana before he passes.

  I would ask of my family and your health and tell you all of Alexander, but as I shall see you soon enough, I shall save it for our reunion. I anticipate your arrival.

  Yours affectionately,

  Lizzy

  At the sound of horses and a carriage approaching, Elizabeth rushed from her chambers and bustled down the stairs until she reached the hall where she skidded to an abrupt halt.

  Mrs. Hamilton looked down her nose at Elizabeth and sniffed. Yes, she would need to replace her housekeeper sooner rather than later. Who knew that when she finally challenged the woman, she would turn into one of those snobbish women of the ton without the money or a title to support her?

  Without being able to leave her rooms much less the house, attending a Mop Fair to interview potential replacements had been impossible. Elizabeth had sent out inquiries, yet that was the only action she could take. At the moment, the household simply could not do without a housekeeper until a replacement was found.

  When the butler opened the door, Elizabeth bounced on her toes as her guests were shown in. Georgiana ran forward with her arms outstretched. “Lizzy!”

  Elizabeth hugged her tightly while rocking her back and forth. Her heart rejoiced to see Georgiana once more. She did not doubt the girl would be upset at losing her beloved cousin, but it was still wonderful to see her. “I am pleased you came.”

  “I would not miss seeing Thomas one last time,” said Georgiana, her eyes bright. “I also cannot wait to see Alexander. I can hold him, can I not?”

  A smile came unbidden to her lips at the girl’s enthusiasm. “Of course, you can.” Elizabeth looked at Jane and Carlisle as they approached. “I cannot wait for all of you to meet Alexander.” Elizabeth embraced Jane, who held her as though she might break before she turned to curtsey to Carlisle.

  “Do not dare,” he said with a grin. “We are brother and sister now. I would never make my sister curtsey . . . Well, maybe Lydia now that I give it more thought.” He kissed her hand then held it with both of his. “I am pleased to see you again. I hope you will call me Nicholas.”

  “Then I am Lizzy.”

  He nodded and glanced around the hall. “It has been many years since I was last here.” He turned his attention back to her. “Darcy said Leeds wishes to speak to me.”

  “If you desire time to refresh yourselves, he will understand. We shall have to rouse him, so he will not even know that you waited.”

  “Where is Darcy?”

  “He rode out to deal with a tenant the steward mentioned. While I do not mind tending to estate duties, I cannot ride out at the moment.”

  “I should hope not,” said Jane with her hand to her chest. “You only gave birth a week ago.”

  Elizabeth rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. “You have helped Aunt Gardiner after her lying-ins. Has she remained abed for weeks at a time?”

  “That is true, but you are more stubborn than my aunt. If you were allowed to step outside, you would go on a three-mile ramble in the woods.”

  Georgiana gasped and giggled. “Lizzy! Would you really?”

  “I have not yet had the urge to go on a three-mile walk, I assure you, but I shall let you know if the whim suddenly strikes. Are we agreed?”

  Jane laughed and shook her head. “I shall refresh myself. Nicholas, what do you wish?”

  “I believe I shall see Leeds first.”

  After a hand gesture to Mrs. Hamilton, Elizabeth turned towards the stairs. “Mrs. Hamilton, pray show the ladies to their rooms. I shall take Viscount Carlisle to see His Grace. We shall have refreshments in my sitting room in an hour.”

  “I hope you are not scandalised,” she explained to her relations, “but since I am sup
posed to remain in my rooms, I shall entertain you in my sitting room, though I intend to come to the dining room for dinner. My rooms are becoming too confining.” She ignored the housekeeper, whose lips were once again drawn into a fine line. Had they really disappeared entirely?

  “I cannot say I blame you,” said Carlisle. “I believe I would feel the same were I to be confined to my room for a length of time.”

  Mrs. Hamilton led Georgiana and Jane down the guest corridor while Elizabeth led Carlisle to the family wing. When they entered the sitting room, she paused and faced him. “One thing before we enter. Thomas does not speak much these days since it is too taxing for him. From what I gather, since the first episode with his heart, he has discussed many of his wishes with his valet, so do not be surprised if his valet speaks for him. He has been my husband’s trusted servant for many years. I believe he required someone in the household who would know his wishes should he die unexpectantly.”

  Carlisle gave a slight hitch back of his head and pursed his lips for a moment. “What of his steward?”

  “I believe he knows what is to occur with the estate.” She stepped over and knocked on Thomas’s door, waited a few moments, and at Colin’s call, entered. “Viscount Carlisle,” she said, “this is Mr. Smith, the duke’s valet.”

  Colin bowed and stepped back as they made their way to Thomas’s bed. She sat along the side and pressed her hand against Thomas’s arm. As he stirred, he moaned. He truly looked horrible, so pale and thin. Even though he was an older gentleman, he had always been handsome. Now his colour grew worse by the day, and he was positively gaunt.

  “Forgive me for waking you.”

  He grimaced and swallowed hard.

  “Are you in pain?” How much laudanum was Colin giving him or was he giving him any at all?

  “Yes,” he managed.

  “He has not had any laudanum since this morning. I shall give him some after you depart. He cannot be awakened so easily after he has taken it and wanted to have the use of his mind as much as possible while the Viscount was here.”