Savage Love

by Sandrine Gasq-Dion

  “Um, I can’t see.”

  Chaz spoke softly “I know. I need it to be dark when I say what I’m about to say.”

  Lev jumped slightly as a warm handed landed on his cheek.

  “I’m sorry I lied to you, but I didn’t know if I could trust you,” Chaz said quietly.

  “Lied? Trust me? I don’t understand.”

  “I’m gay, Lev. I’ve wanted to kiss you from the moment you walked into that bar. I like you — and I think you like me, too.”

  “I do,” Lev whispered.

  “Can I kiss you? I’ve wanted to taste you.”

  Lev’s body warmed as Chaz’s hand caressed his hip. Fingers tucked under his chin and lifted it so their eyes were locked. Lev swallowed hard and nodded slightly. Chaz leaned into him and Lev’s breath hitched as their lips met softly. Warmth flooded his entire body as Chaz’s lips brushed against his. A flick of tongue and Lev whimpered, opening his mouth.

  Chaz Savage’s taste was one he’d never forget.

  Their tongues met and curled around each other inquisitively, each of them seeking to taste the other fully. Chaz broke from the kiss slowly, caressing Lev’s cheek.

  “I’m sorry,” Lev blurted out.

  “For what?”

  “I…that was my first kiss. I’m sorry if I did it wrong.”

  Chaz smiled. “It was perfect.”

  “So, um, now you know. I’ve never been with anyone.”

  Chaz’s stomach flipped over at the words. God, he’d never been with a virgin before. All the guys he’d been with were experienced. Lev was different, though; he’d known from the get-go there was something special about him.

  He caressed Lev’s cheekbone. A sliver of light from the street lamp illuminated his pale green eyes. Chaz could tell he was scared and nervous. He leaned in and kissed him lightly.

  “We don’t have to do anything. Tonight I just want to hold you. Would that be okay?”

  “You mean … spend the night here?”

  “Yes.” Chaz grinned. “No sex, just holding.”

  Lev blew out a sigh of relief. “Okay.”

  “Hey, what kind of boy do you think I am?” Chaz cocked an eyebrow.

  “I don’t think, I mean I don’t know —”

  “Shh.” Chaz leaned in again and brushed their lips together.

  He took Lev’s hand and led him up the stairs to his room. Once he’d shut the door, he turned to find Lev looking around warily. Chaz removed his shirt and crossed the room to Lev. The light green eyes widened as he drew closer. He slipped his fingers under the edge of Lev’s shirt and tugged it up a bit. Lev raised his arms and Chaz got a good look at the beautiful cream-colored skin.

  “You’re so beautiful, Lev,” Chaz whispered. “Please tell me your change of scenery is going to last a long time.”

  Lev swallowed hard as Chaz’s hands drifted up his torso.

  “I want it to. I’ve never felt like this before.”

  “How do you feel?” Chaz kissed Lev’s neck softly.

  “I’m all knotted up inside and I feel like I need you to kiss me. You have to keep kissing me.”

  “I can do that.” Chaz pulled Lev into his arms. “I can do that all night.”

  Lev wrapped his arms around Chaz’s neck as his feet left the floor. The much larger man’s mouth descended on his and all of Lev’s worries faded away.

  He was in the arms of the man he loved.

  Yes, loved Chaz. He had from the second he’d laid eyes on him.

  “Don’t let go,” Lev whispered.

  “Never.”

  ~*~

  Chaz stopped by Cole Ryker’s office after practice. He hadn’t seen his roomie in weeks, and it was starting to worry him. Cole was at his desk, as always, a mountain of paperwork to his right and his computer to his left. He looked up when Chaz walked in.

  “Hey.” Cole sat back in the chair and winced.

  “You okay?” Chaz slung himself across the chair facing Cole. “Ronnie’s not back, is he?” Chaz had almost killed Cole’s ex-boyfriend when the man’s abuse had landed Cole in the hospital.

  “No, he’s definitely gone. I’m sore because I’m so tense. I’m thinking of changing professions.”

  “Oh? Plan to play football with me?” Chaz chuckled.

  “No.” Cole sighed and clasped his hands together. “I’m thinking of becoming a firefighter.”

  Chaz blinked.

  “Well? Say something.” Cole cocked a brow.

  “I think if that’s what you want to do, you should do it. You need to be happy, Cole.”

  “Well, you’re actually glowing.” Cole grinned.

  “Is that why I haven’t seen you much? You staying away?”

  “Well, you’ve been spending all your free time with Lev.” Cole furrowed his brows. “How much do you really know about this guy, Chaz? Let me at least run a background check —”

  “No!” Chaz fairly shouted. “Look, Lev is different, okay?”

  “I’ve been approached by the media, Chaz. I’ve kept my mouth shut, but you and I both know they’re like a pack of hyenas when they think they’ve scented a scoop.” Cole paused and studied his best friend. “Thankfully, they haven’t gotten a good look at Lev and they don’t know his last name. Please be careful, okay? I’m your best friend, so they never even think we’re a couple. But hanging out with Lev in public is going to get a gay stamp on your ass. Especially considering the way you look at him.”

  “How do I look at him?”

  “Like you’re in love, Chaz.”

  Chaz snorted. “It hasn’t even been that long since I met him.”

  “Almost three months,” Cole pointed out. “I’ve never seen you spend this much time with someone — and out, where you can be seen.”

  “He’s just … I don’t know. He’s so damned sweet and innocent, Cole. I think he truly cares about me.”

  “I hope you’re right, Chaz, because I see you falling hard and fast for this guy. Just be careful, okay?”

  “Yes, Dad,” Chaz drawled.

  Cole sat forward and eyed Chaz closely. “God, you are falling in love with him!”

  Chaz shifted uncomfortably under Cole’s glare. “I care about him, okay? Is that what you want to hear? Sometimes I hope they do catch me kissing Lev or something. God! I’m so damned tired of hiding!”

  Cole took Chaz’s hand. “Just wait until the season’s over, okay? You’ll go to the Super Bowl —”

  Chaz snorted.

  “You will; I’d bet money on it. Once you’re the MVP, you can say and do what you want. Look at all the players who do stupid shit and come out smelling like roses.”

  “None of them have come out as gay, Cole,” Chaz huffed.

  “You’ll be the first and I’ll be right there with you.”

  Chaz smiled. “You’re a good friend, Cole. I’m lucky to have you.”

  “Yeah, you are. Now get out of here,” Cole laughed.

  “Later, bitch.”

  “Pussy.”

  ***

  Lev was waiting for Chaz to come home from practice. He was hiding by the back door, checking the streets every now and then. When Chaz finally pulled up in the driveway, Lev stood quietly by the door. He hadn’t heard from Samson or Mario lately, and hoped they would leave him alone a little longer. He needed to try to explain to Chaz what was going on, and he needed to do it soon.

  Lev held a single white rose behind his back as the back door opened and Chaz stood smiling at him.

  “Hey, I thought I saw your car a few blocks down.” Chaz grinned.

  Lev held the rose out.

  “I know it’s kind of girlie —”

  “Lev, that’s so sweet.” Chaz took the rose and held it to his nose. “It’s perfect.”

  “You like roses?” Lev’s eyes widened.

  “I love them, and I love white ones the most. Get in here.”

  Lev walked through the kitchen and looked around the house. As always, it was spotles
s. Chaz walked by him as he removed his shirt and Lev’s mouth dropped open.

  “Oh God, you’re all bruised up!”

  “It happens in my profession,” Chaz chuckled.

  “Let me take care of you.” Lev took Chaz’s hand.

  Chaz turned around and searched Lev’s face. He genuinely seemed worried.

  “Hey, this happens a lot, but if you want to massage me I won’t bitch.”

  “Massage what?” Lev blushed.

  “Oh, my little Russian has dirty thoughts?” Chaz laughed.

  “I…well I want you to kiss me.”

  Chaz pulled Lev into his arms and palmed his cheek.

  “You never have to ask me for that, I always want to. I just want to make sure I’m not pushing you, Lev.”

  “I know you have more experience than me, but I was hoping you’d be my first.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.” Lev nodded, pulling Chaz towards the stairs.

  “Wait, you mean now?”

  “Yes.” Lev glanced over his shoulder at Chaz. “Is that okay?”

  Was that okay? Oh hell, he’d wanted to make love to Lev from the second he set eyes on him at the bar. Chaz took Lev’s free hand and pulled him up the stairs. He shut his bedroom door and turned to find Lev in front of him, practically shaking.

  “Hey, we don’t have to do this.” Chaz assured him.

  “But I want to. I want to know what it’s like to have you inside me. I want to experience all of it.”

  Chaz removed Lev’s shirt and ran his index finger down the toned muscles of his abs. Damn, but the guy was gorgeous. He was also very sweet and vulnerable, which was why he planned on taking his time and making sure Lev was comfortable through it all. Lev scooted onto the bed and Chaz removed his pants. He still had the white rose in his hand and he ran it down the side of Lev’s thigh.

  “Chaz,” Lev whispered.

  “I’m right here with you.” Chaz bent and placed a kiss on Lev’s navel.

  Chaz took Lev’s mouth in what he hoped was not only a reassuring kiss, but a passionate one as well. He caressed Lev’s thigh as he inched towards his balls. Lev’s breath hitched and gasps broke the silence in the room as Chaz massaged his balls, dipping lower to rub at Lev’s hole. He’d never been with someone as vocal as Lev, and damn if he didn’t love it. Every sigh, every whimper fueled Chaz’s desire.

  Chaz shimmied down Lev’s body and kissed his hipbone. He trailed his tongue across the ridges of Lev’s abs before dipping lower to lick at the engorged and leaking tip of Lev’s cock. It was fucking beautiful. Chaz wrapped his lips around Lev’s hot, hard length and swirled his tongue around teasingly.

  “Oh!” Lev bucked up and gripped the sheets.

  “Like that?” Chaz asked, as he slowly dipped into Lev’s slit, gathering precome.

  “Oh God, Chaz. I’ve never … Damn!” Lev panted as Chaz took him down to his pubes. He watched in fascination as Chaz buried his nose in his groin and moaned as he swallowed all around him.

  “Fuck, you’re good at that!” Lev rasped.

  Chaz lifted his head with a wicked smile. “I’m just starting.”

  Lev didn’t know whether to scream or cry. Chaz sucked him down, teasing his rim and dipping to suck on his balls. Wet heat traveled down his balls to his ass and then Lev let out a loud moan when Chaz licked at his hole. He spread his legs wider as Chaz plunged his tongue inside Lev’s body. He’d never had anyone touch him like this and his body was in overdrive, his dick leaking copious amounts of precome. Chaz sucked on his finger, coating it with saliva and the first real pain hit Lev like a two by four.

  “Shit,” Lev panted, as Chaz slipped a finger inside him.

  “Relax for me, Lev. I promise I won’t hurt you.”

  “Feels full, pressure.” Lev closed his eyes and tried to breathe normally.

  “I’m going to slide in a bit further, try to find your spot.”

  “My what?” Lev’s body jerked as Chaz added another finger and touched something deep inside him. His eyes widened and a choked gasp of surprise left his lips.

  “There you are.” Chaz smiled, rubbing the knot of nerves in Lev’s body.

  “Holy…oh God,” Lev whimpered.

  “How’s that feel?” Chaz asked, quietly.

  “I’m going to come,” Lev rasped.

  “Not yet.” Chaz removed his fingers and grabbed the bottle of lube and condoms from his nightstand drawer. He sheathed his dick and drizzled plenty of lube on himself and Lev’s hole, working the lube in with his fingers.

  “I’m going to make love to you, Lev.”

  “O-okay.” Lev nodded.

  “I want to see your face while I’m inside you.”

  Lev nodded again and tried to keep his eyes open as Chaz worked his hole with two fingers. The pain was slowly subsiding as Chaz worked his fingers in and out, scissoring them as he kissed Lev’s nipples, nibbling on them. Lev’s back arched and Chaz’s mouth descended on his. His legs spread out and up, and then Chaz slipped inside to the rim. Lev’s eyes sprang open and he stared into Chaz’s crystal blue gaze.

  “It’s okay, I’ll go slow,” Chaz whispered. “Tell me when to move.”

  Lev framed Chaz’s face with his hands; their eyes locked and Lev nodded slowly. Chaz inched in a little more and the pain suddenly disappeared. Pressure built in his spine the further Chaz pushed inside, but Lev also felt the pleasure of being full. Chaz’s dick rubbed him in all the right places. His body shook and his hands gripped Chaz’s biceps as they moved together slowly. Chaz’s biceps shook, and a bead of sweat formed on his brow as he kissed Lev softly, making love to his mouth as well as his body.

  Lev floated on the pleasure, his mouth making him part of Chaz. This is what he’d always wanted — and Chaz had turned out to be everything he’d thought he would be. He loved this man, everything about him. He was sweet, caring and kind, and Lev held onto Chaz as they moved faster, both of them racing toward orgasm. Lev’s back arched, his toes curled and a loud cry left his lips as he erupted beneath Chaz. Seconds later, Chaz came roaring inside him, a cry of ecstasy leaving his lips. Chaz slumped on top of him, breathing hard and Lev ran his fingers through Chaz’s soft hair.

  “Are you okay?” Chaz said softly.

  “Oh shit, Chaz. I’m fucking perfect.” Lev nuzzled Chaz’s neck.

  A soft chuckle met his ears and Chaz lifted his head.

  “Are you really okay?”

  “Yes, I’m just fine.” Lev smiled.

  “I didn’t hurt you or anything?”

  “No. I mean, it was a little painful at first, but then it was perfect.”

  Lev searched Chaz’s eyes. “Um, did you like it?”

  Chaz smiled, kissing Lev’s nose. “I loved it. I’ve had sex before, Lev, but with you — something is different. I feel so close to you somehow. Does that make sense?”

  Lev nodded. Dammit, he really needed to tell Chaz the truth. How could he? What if he lost Chaz? Lev shivered at the thought and Chaz’s warm arms surrounded him.

  “Are you cold?” Chaz asked.

  “No, I’m just fine.” Lev sighed.

  “Night, Lev.”

  “Night.”

  Chaz awoke to an empty bed a few hours later. He frowned and sat up, looking around his room. Voices floated from downstairs and Chaz rolled out of bed and headed in that direction. Lev was sitting on the couch, watching a movie.

  “Lev?”

  He almost jumped off the couch in surprise.

  “Oh, hey.” Lev smiled, sheepishly.

  “Is everything okay?”

  “I couldn’t sleep is all.” Lev moved over on the couch as Chaz came to join him.

  “Is that all?”

  Lev ducked his head. “Well, I was kind of sore after all the adrenaline wore off.”

  “I’m sorry.” Chaz kissed Lev’s temple.

  “Oh no, don’t be. It was so worth it.”

  Chaz turned toward the TV and smiled. “ ‘
Can’t Hardly Wait’?”

  “It was on my list of movies to watch,” Lev admitted. “I see you have a ton of Eighties movies.”

  “Well, Cole is the sci-fi nerd, I’m the Eighties geek.” Chaz shrugged.

  “I love Eighties movies.” Lev grinned. “I watched two before you came down.”

  “Just how long have you been awake?” Chaz arched a brow.

  “Um, a while. I didn’t snoop or anything. Well, I did, but only in your movie cabinet.”

  “My house is yours, Lev. Don’t think you can’t look through stuff. I’m not hiding anything from you.”

  Lev looked down at his hands. He was hiding things from Chaz. How bad did that make him feel just then? They’d been intimate with a lie hanging over them. Lev sighed and Chaz chuckled next to him, watching the move scene.

  “What?” Lev asked.

  “A denderpheliac.”

  “Getting jiggy with trees,” Lev laughed.

  Chaz cracked up. He pulled Lev closer and kissed his temple. “How about some popcorn? We can watch ‘The Breakfast Club’ after this.”

  “That was next.” Lev smiled. Chaz stood up and Lev took his hand. “Promise me, whatever happens, you’ll never leave me.”

  Chaz looked down at Lev and searched his face. Sure, he’d been with guys before, but no one was like Lev. They’d only been seeing each other for a couple months but Lev was the one for him. He wasn’t ready to go shouting his feelings from the roof, but he knew he wouldn’t be leaving Lev anytime soon. There was something uniquely genuine about him — from the way he kissed to the things he said. And Chaz loved it.

  Chaz leaned in to Lev’s face and kissed him.

  “Never.”

  ~*~

  ‘Never’ came to an end one month later. Lev pulled up down the block from Chaz’s house and got out. He always parked a block or two away so no one knew Chaz had a male guest. He also always went through the back way so no one saw him coming in through the front door. He was going to tell Chaz the truth tonight. Truth was, he’d wanted to do it before they made love, but was worried about Chaz’s reaction. So, of course he’d chickened out.