Love on Leave

by Leah McDonnell

  “You’re always so serious at work. But I knew deep down there was an inner wild woman in there!”

  I laugh. “Nah. Being the wild woman was more Lana’s speed. She was Lana Mathews back then. Or ‘the bombshell’ as guys called her. She had a runway body and boobs that could land her straight in the middle of a Snoop Dog video. The total hot girl cliché, all the way to the blond hair and blue eyes. One of those girls you wanted to punch in the face just so they’ll look bad for a few days. She had that loud over the top laugh of hers and never took herself too seriously. She was always up for a party and typically the first one drunk. Clearly, she hasn’t changed much, even after all these years.”

  Shelby leans back on my file cabinet. “Oh, how I love that crazy lady!”

  “I’d been in love a few times, or at least I thought I had. I’d had a mostly ‘off again’ relationship with Wayne Stewart, the town bad boy who was one of those, I don’t want her but I don’t want anyone else to have her either, type of guys.”

  She crosses her arms. “I knew there had to be a guy.”

  “Oh, there was a guy all right. But Wayne definitely wasn’t him.” I admit as memories of twenty-five years ago begin to flood my mind…

  Memorial Day Weekend - 1994

  It’s 1994. The days of grunge, rap, and good ole boot-scootin’ country. Mtv, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, tanning beds, acrylic nails, and Guess jeans are all the rage. Of course, everyone who's anyone has a beeper. I wouldn’t put Lana and me in the spoiled category. We’re way too down to earth for that. We have part-time jobs, have chores, and shop 2nd hand like everyone else our age. But thanks to our upper-middle-class parents, who are all happily married and successful, we’ve both grown up in a bit of a “white picket fence” life. Lana is a few years younger than me, but always holds her own when it comes to the older crowd. She graduated high school last night with my little brother James and is heading to college with me in the fall.

  “Lana! Would you hurry the hell up? We should have been on the road an hour ago!” I honk the horn repeatedly, knowing good and damn well it won’t make her pack any faster. “We’ve got a beach full of guys to flirt with and an obscene amount of beer waiting for us a few hours away,” I yell from the front seat, hoping the thought of boys and booze will hurry her up.

  “Calm your tits, Kate! I’m coming!” she snips, bouncing her large blue polka-dotted overnight bag on her shoulder.

  “It’s about time!” I grumble, annoyed how off schedule we are.

  “Ugh! You and that damn schedule!”

  “Now where are you going?”

  “That bag is just makeup and shoes. Duh!”

  I throw my head back. “Oh for Pete’s sake!”

  She gives a devilish smile. “Like you said… We have a beach full of hot guys waiting on us. I have to look my best. ” She flips her hair as she spins back towards the house.

  “Finally on the road and only one hour behind your precious schedule,” Lana teases, opening the bag of M&M’s I’d brought for us to snack on.

  “Give me some of those!” I say, snatching the bag. “I wanted to get the hell out of town before Wayne and his Merry Band of Assholes get on the road. I don’t want to take any chances of running into him on the way down. And to help ensure it, I didn’t tell a soul when we were leaving or where we’re staying. Not even James.”

  “Your brother’s already there, why wouldn’t you tell him?”

  “Because! You know how Wayne is. He gets things out of people. He’s like a walking lie detector. The less James knows, the better. I have no doubt we’ll run into Wayne at some point, but I want to enjoy as much time free from his insanity as we can. I refuse to have a Spring Break repeat.”

  “Please, God! Don’t even mention the cold, rainy, trip from hell!” She groans. “I was about ready to kill him by the time the week was over. He was one step away from peeing on you when other guys were around.”

  “One of these days he’s finally going to get it through that thick, stoned, skull of his that it’s over.”

  She slides her yellow wayfarers down her nose. “And, let’s not forget the whole Jenn debacle.”

  I laugh. “How could I? She spent the first two days of the trip piled in the hotel room, having loud porn star sex with the guy she met from Auburn. Then she spent the final two days in total hysterics after she realized he’d given her crabs.”

  Lana cringes. “A midnight run to Walgreens for a RID Kit was not my idea of a fun vacation.”

  I beat my fist against the steering wheel. “Come hell or high water, this will be the ‘do-over’ weekend we deserve!”

  I proclaim as we wave goodbye to Alpharetta, in pursuit of fun, sun, and if we’re lucky... a little love.

  An hour into the drive, with the wind whipping through our hair and singing every song from Prince’s Purple Rain CD, Lana has had enough of the silence.

  “I still can’t believe you convinced your dad to let us take his car.” She runs her hot pink nails along the front dash of my dad’s brand new, cherry red, BMW 325i convertible.

  “He was kind of forced into it. His old Honda they gave me is a stick shift,” I say, reaching for the case of CDs in the back seat. “I’ve tried for weeks to teach myself how to drive it, but I still suck. There’s no way in hell I would have made it in all the beach traffic.”

  “You are pretty damn awful at it.”

  “Oh, gee thanks!” I chuckle. “I had to beg him to let us take it. He finally caved after hours of pleading in my best daddy’s girl voice. James was beyond pissed.”

  She pulls out my Green Day disc. “Well, thank you, Mr. Carpenter and your mid-life crisis!”

  I turn the volume up as “Basket Case” begins to play. “I have a feeling this is going to be a trip for the memory books!”

  We live outside Atlanta, Georgia, so it’s only a few hours’ drive to the coast. A trip Lana and I had taken so many times we know the route like the back of our hands. Palm trees slowly appear as we inch closer to the state line. Wooden, spray-painted signs advertise roadside stands selling watermelons, tomatoes, and peaches, while the scent of hot boiled peanuts fills the air. A burst of excitement rushes through us when we spot the big blue “Welcome to Florida - The Sunshine State” sign.

  Lana pops up and down in her seat. “I gotta pee!”

  “I need to get gas anyway, so you’re in luck,” I say, laughing. Creeping the car as slow as possible into the Shell station.

  She crosses her legs back and forth. “Hurrrryyyy!”

  “Grab me a Dr. Pepper while you’re in there!” I yell as she bolts from the car.

  She only acknowledges me by shooting the bird over her back as she double times it to the door.

  “Whoa! Nice wheels!”

  I load the pump back into its cradle as I glance around for who said it among the caravan of cars.

  A scruffy, shirtless guy in swim trunks and dollar store flip flops pops out from the pump behind me. “This your car?”

  “I wish. My dad let me borrow it for the weekend.” I admit, smiling more than I probably should.

  His eyes widen as Lana rounds the car with an arm full of drinks and a large bag of bar-b-que chips.

  “You ladies headed to Panama City?” he asks, more intrigued with Lana in view.

  “Hell yeah, we are!” she flirts, quickly chiming into the conversation. “It’s not a real party unless we’re there!”

  “Oh, really? So are we.” He points over to his buddies in the red Jeep Wrangler beside us. “Where are y’all staying?”

  “Umm, we’re staying on the north end of the beach… uh… The Best Western,” I interject.

  “Well, two beautiful babes in a hot car like this. You’ll certainly stand out in the crowd. I’m sure we’ll have no trouble finding you.” He gives a cocky winy as he walks back to his friends.

  Her brow furrows. “I thought we were staying at the Sea Blue Motel?” she asks, sliding back into the car.

>   “We are! You idiot! We aren’t even there yet and you’re already trying to hook up! You better put that thing on lockdown!” I say, pointing between her legs.

  She pouts. “But he was hot and it’s been far too long since I had a good shag."

  She wiggles her eyebrows as her frown grows to a mischievous smirk.

  “Gross, Lana! He had a dip in his mouth!”

  We bust out in loud laughter as we make our way back onto the small Florida highway.

  I smell the salt in the warm air as soon as we turn onto Front Beach Road and catch glimpses of the emerald blue ocean between the hotels. Yellow flags are flying, cautioning beachgoers of the surf conditions. The shops and restaurants are buzzing, as guys with cases of beer on their shoulders and girls in triangle top bikinis pop across the road like a game of Frogger. Excitement radiates from their faces, all eager to know what the weekend has in store for them.

  We pull into our hotel in time to watch the sunset in the distance. Both of us taking a moment to appreciate it before we unload the car and insanity commences.

  “I know you said you were running low on money, but damn! This may have been pushing it.” Lana scoffs, looking around the dingy hotel room. “This is one step up from a by-the-hour!”

  “Oh, it’s not that bad!” I say, hoping to hide my own concern. “It’s only the two of us splitting the cost this time. I had to go cheap. Besides, we’ve partied in a lot worse places.”

  She opens the drab curtain to our parking lot view. “I knew I should have been worried when it had the word ‘motel’ in the name. You better get some beer in me quick or you may find me sleeping in the car.”

  “Speaking of…why don’t you go get ready? It’ll take you longer to get dressed than me.”

  Lana’s inability to be on time has been an ongoing battle we’ve had since we were kids.

  “I’ll finish unpacking while you’re in the shower.”

  “Well, don’t put any of my stuff on the floor. God only knows what’s been crawling around this room!” she yells from the bathroom.

  Sadly, I have to agree with her. Perhaps I had gone a tad overboard on my choice of cheap accommodations, seeing as how I’m pretty sure this is where they filmed the movie, Psycho.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Lana runs a brush through her wet hair. “So!” she says, plopping on the squeaky bed in her towel. “Who are we going to sweet talk into buying us beer?”

  BAM! BAM! BAM!

  Her face twists. “Who the hell is banging on the door?” she whispers. “I thought you said no one knows where we are?”

  “No one does.”

  “Then who is it?”

  “Beats the shit out of me! Go check the peephole.”

  BAM! BAM! BAM!

  “Answer the damn door, Kate! I know y’all are in there!” A familiar voice growls through the door.

  We stare at each other with dropped jaws. “How the hell did Wayne find you?”

  “Not only is he a human lie detector, but he’s also a human tracking device!” I whisper.

  She peers through the peephole. “Holy Shit! It’s the entire crew.”

  “Open the fucking door! We can hear you two whispering!” Wayne shouts as voices get louder and louder in the hall.

  She lifts an eyebrow. “Well, at least we know who we can sweet talk into buying us beer!” Opening the door to my ex and his merry band of morons.

  “Nice towel!” Wayne teases as Lana opens the door half-naked. He tumbles in clearly drunk, along with five other guys from our hometown.

  I cross my arms. “How did you find me?”

  “We saw you get out of the car,” he answers, smugly.

  I pretend to fidget with my suitcase. “What do you mean you saw us get out of the car? Have you resorted to following me now?”

  He crashes across the bed and grabs the remote. “No, smart-ass. We saw you guys from our room. Y’all pulled up, unloaded and walked in. I actually thought you were following me.”

  “Wait! What!?” I say, more confused than ever. “Are you staying at this hotel?

  “Yep!” He laughs as he points toward the door. “Right across the hall.”

  “And Donny, Chris, and Toots have the room beside you.” Wayne’s best friend AJ, adds.

  Lana and I stare at each other in disbelief. Oh, God! This can’t be happening! I think.

  I raise my voice so everyone in the room hears. “Let me make sure I have this straight. Out of hundreds of hotels in Panama City, we pick the one motel our entire hometown is staying in? And if that isn’t enough, we get the room directly across from them?”

  “Yep! Pretty Much!” AJ answers, laughing.

  “Oh, don’t even pretend like you’re mad, Kate. It wasn’t like we weren’t going to run into each other at some point.” Wayne says, rolling closer to me. “Especially, in daddy’s car.” He reaches over to rub my ass. “You two stick out like a fucking sore thumb in that thing.”

  I pop his hand. “Don’t start, Wayne!”

  “What!?” Pretending he doesn’t know what I’m talking about.

  “You promised me we wouldn’t have a repeat of Spring break.”

  “We won’t,” he interrupts. “You being across the hall isn’t exactly ideal for me either.”

  “I guess you’re right. Pretty hard to run women in and out, with your ex around to rain on your whore parade.”

  “Ok, you two!” Lana says, wrapping her arm around my neck, finally dressed.

  “Aw, Lana,” Wayne flirts. “I was enjoying you in your little white towel.”

  “Wayne? Be a dear and go buy Kate and me some beer, please?” she asks, ignoring the towel comment.

  After wearing out his welcome, he finally stands to head out. He turns back. “Wait! You want me to buy y’all beer, so you can get drunk and cruise the Strip for other guys?”

  “That about sums it up.” She shoves a stack of twenties in his shirt pocket. “As many cases of Coors Lite a hundred will buy, please?”

  “Oh and grab us a beer funnel while you’re there!” she shouts as he heads down the hall.

  It’s the first night of our vacation and things are already off to a rocky start. Between the shitty room, a crappy dinner and Hotel Alpharetta, I’m beginning to worry this trip might not be the “do-over” I’m hoping for.

  The traffic on the Strip is already bumper to bumper as far as the eye can see. It’s a long-lived tradition for hordes of teenagers to pile in cars and the back of pickup trucks, with coolers loaded and music as loud as it will go; all to spend hours riding the “Strip.” The main parkway through Panama City Beach and a tradition I can’t wait to commence.

  “You look hot, Kate!” Lana says as we head out of the Seafood Shack. “Good call borrowing my shorts. Your ass looks better in them than mine does.”

  “Thanks!” I shake my butt at her. “But can you see my scar in this top? The straps keep falling.”

  “Nah. All the purple has finally faded, so it blends in more than it used to.”

  “It’s about damn time. Nothing’s worse than a constant reminder of my past stupidity.”

  “Did he ever apologize for what happened?”

  “Only if you consider, ‘Oops! My bad!’ an apology.”

  “Don’t give another thought on the loser. I’m so glad you finally got him out of your system. Focus on us and our beach full of possibilities!” She jumps into the passenger seat without using the door. “Have I mentioned how much I love this car?”

  I laugh. “A time or two.”

  “Well, I think it’s about time we go get into some trouble!”

  “I love the car too! So maybe this is a good time for us to set some ground rules.” I say firmly as the annoying honks from a pack of rented scooters pass by.

  “Number one… Absolutely no drinking and driving. Number two… no fornicating.”

  “Party pooper!” she jokes.

  “Number three… No smoking! This one’s more for me. You know
how I get cigarette happy when I drink. And number four,” I say in my most authoritative voice. “The most important rule... “No barfing in the car!”

  She laughs.

  “I’m serious Lana! I have to return my dad’s car exactly how he gave it to me. If I even get so much as bird shit on it, he’ll disown me!”

  “I knowwww,” she moans. “Stop worrying! You’re killing my buzz, Mom!”

  I pull the BMW onto the slow-moving parkway, giving us time to unwind, find the perfect music, and people watch.

  “I hate to bring up Wayne again, but I’m glad y’all were able to come to an understanding,” Lana says, flipping the visor mirror to re-apply her lipstick.

  “I guess. As long as he can hold up his end of the deal. Things are always fine until he gets to drinking. Then it’s a whole new ballgame.”

  “Well, they’re headed to Club LaVela tonight so I’m sure they’ll be gone until morning. So at least we know we’re in the clear tonight.”

  “Yep. We agreed he and his crew could go tonight and you and I will have it tomorrow.”

  She pops her cleavage up above her shirt line. “Do you think you’ll be able to sneak me in?”

  “All the bars here are nineteen and up. Wear a tight shirt and smile pretty. The bouncer will be too distracted to pay attention to your birthday,” I tease as we creep down the Strip.

  “I hate always being the youngest of the bunch.”

  “You complaining about it incessantly won’t change anything. Besides, you look older than me. No one would ever guess you’re only seventeen.”

  “You had an early birthday in school and I was cursed with a late one. It’s so humiliating! July can’t get here soon enough,” she whines.

  “Well, I guess you could always get a fake ID like my brother did.”

  “Speaking of James...what’s he up to tonight?”

  “Honestly, I have no clue. I figure we’ll run into him at some point tonight. But if not, he’s staying at The Sunspree. We can go by and visit tomorrow.”

  Her mouth falls. “Are you shitting me? Your brother is staying in the nicest hotel on the beach, while we’re stuck in a vile roach motel?”