Kindling for the Heart

by Karen Legasy

  “And what did she say to that?” Jo held her breath.

  “That meeting you was one of the best things to happen to her in a long time.”

  “I bet.”

  “Her eyes really did light up whenever she looked at you, and I thought for sure she was going to get you to move to Toronto.”

  “Anna.” Jo touched her sister’s hand. “I would never leave you guys and move to Toronto.”

  “You were right, Jo.” Their mother reclaimed her chair. “The American with the metal detector found a few peso coins and a silver earring this morning. He said the true fun is in the thrill of the hunt rather than the catch at the end of the day.”

  “Funny how that turns some people on.” Jo pictured Sam armed with dimples and sparkling eyes for her lesbian detector that found lost hearts only to be dug up and discarded. Like the kindling retrieved from the cottage, only to be thrown away on the streets of Toronto.

  So much for Sam’s kindling for the heart having a lasting effect. It may have brought on a few sparks and small flames, but there were no smoldering embers to keep the fire going.

  Chapter Forty-One

  Sam modeled her interview clothes in the mirror and approved of the confidence-building attire she’d chosen. Black wool pants, a matching blazer, and a dark purple, knit turtleneck made up her outfit. Gold studs in her ears and a sporty black watch were her only adornments other than the silver buckle on her black leather belt. She would wear low-heeled black leather dress boots and have on her long navy overcoat with a red woolen scarf for her entrance.

  Sam’s brown hair was spiky and neatly styled in a short cut that brought out the lesbian in her, so she hoped. Working in a discrimination-free environment was paramount to her accepting a position with Maxwell and Associates. If not offered the job, she would explore opening her own office to practice law in Timmins instead.

  Packing and studying complete, Sam needed to burn off energy before settling in for the short night then flight to Timmins. She carefully removed her clothes and placed them on hangers, ready for the morning.

  Her gym bag beckoned so she pulled out her running gear. An end-of-day jog around the neighborhood would help her relax. Sam was excited, adrenaline pumped for a good interview, and she would be with Jo by tomorrow at this time. She had to be.

  Streetlights lit up her way along sidewalks in the quiet neighborhood of brick bungalows and outdated two-stories that housed many of Toronto’s young professionals and their families. Sam longed for a family of her own, one with a dog and a woman to love.

  No stars shone down as Sam glanced above at a passing plane. The day had been gray and there was no snow to brighten it up. A cool breeze sent chills through her jacket, but it was nothing compared to the frigid temperature she anticipated when stepping off the plane in Timmins the next morning. Snow would most likely crunch under her boots and the short walk to the terminal would have a biting wind. Her rental car would be waiting and so would Jo, but unbeknownst to her as she cozily worked in her home office.

  Sam slowed to a cool-down trot and began to rehearse her meeting with Jo. She’d drive out to her house right after the interview and Mollie would bark to announce her arrival. Jo would come to the door to see who was there and Sam would be kneeling on the step. She’d hold up the bouquet of kindling with its red ribbon, roses to be added in Timmins.

  Mollie would rush out and Sam would give her a big hug before beginning her opening argument to the one-woman jury. She’d start by begging Jo to listen, telling her about the mix-up with the names and that she wanted to move to Timmins so they could be together. She imagined Jo stammering at the door then rushing into her arms.

  Thoughts of that first kiss made Sam gasp. She’d give Jo the bouquet and they’d head inside to make love with ferocity, shedding clothes and devouring each other with every moan. They’d both cry—at least, Sam knew she would because her emotions were so raw they brought tears just thinking about it.

  She sat in the cold wicker chair on her front porch to fantasize before going inside. Trish’s car was in the driveway and Sam wanted to be alone with her thoughts a bit longer. She leaned back and looked up at the bright sky of city lights and airport traffic.

  Jo was probably out back with Mollie, looking at the same sky but with stars shining through the solitude. Each breath would blow out clouds of vapor and her eyelashes would be coated in ice crystals. Sam closed her eyes and grinned.

  By the time she stepped inside, Trish was comfortably watching the new TV, lying on the couch under a gold fleece blanket. She muted the volume and smiled at Sam.

  “Are you ready for your big day tomorrow?”

  “Yes, I am.” Sam kicked off her runners. “I’ll be up early since I have to be at the airport by seven.”

  “You must be so nervous. If there’s anything I can do to help sort things out with your Jo, let me know.”

  “Thanks, but I don’t think so. Where’s Joanne tonight?”

  “She had to study for an exam tomorrow. Kind of like you, I guess. How ironic that we both end up with someone named Jo and mine wants to be a lawyer too.”

  “Their names are different.” Sam headed to the kitchen. “Besides, they’re not at all alike.”

  “I sure hope your Timmins Jo forgives you.”

  “For what?” Sam reached for a glass. “You’re the one who made a mess of things.”

  Trish came into the kitchen. “I’m sorry. What I meant to say is I hope she can get past her anger at you.”

  “She got hurt here the other day and I need to fix things.” Sam filled her glass with water.

  “What are you going to do? I mean, what if she’s not home and you don’t get to see her?”

  Sam backed away and took a swig. “She’ll be there.” She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “She has to be, and I’m not planning on coming back here until next week.”

  “Good for you.” Trish playfully punched Sam’s arm. “That’s one of the things I like about you, Sam. Your confidence has always been admirable. I can’t wait to hear how it goes. Will you text me to let me know how things turn out?”

  “Only if Jo’s with me when I send the message because I’m not risking anymore screw-ups. Now I have to get to bed.”

  “Good luck.” Trish gave her a hug. “I know you’ll do well in Timmins tomorrow.”

  “Thanks.” Sam barely reciprocated then marched back to her room.

  She sat on the edge of her bed and felt like she was going to be sick. She acted confident, but Trish had created some doubt in her mind. What if she couldn’t reach Jo? What if she was back here on her own by tomorrow night at this time? That would be a nightmare. How could she ever survive?

  No, it was not going to happen. Worst-case scenario, she would take a hotel room for the night and try again to see Jo the next day. If all else failed, she would visit Julia then Anna to plead her case. Surely she’d be able to reach someone.

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Jo lay sprawled on the brown-checkered couch in her shed, naked and about to explode. Her hips lifted off the fabric, arching toward the ceiling as exploring fingers teased out an orgasm on the brink of release.

  “Oh yes.” Jo’s breathing was uneven, her full bladder preventing her from letting go.

  “This is our shed now.” Sam’s words were muffled by kisses all over Jo’s breasts. “I want to stay here forever.”

  “What the fuck is going on in here?” The door to the shed flung open and Jan’s scowling silhouette glowed through the sunlight.

  “What…what are you doing here?” Jo said.

  “This is supposed to be your place. Not Sam’s.” Jan stomped into the shed and began to shove Jo.

  “Wake up. Calm down.”

  “Anna?” Jo flinched out of the dream and sprang up. She was in bed with her sister, the room dark and their mother snoring. Her heart thumped. “Oh shit, I’m sorry if I woke you.”

  “It’s okay.” Anna clicked on
her bedside lamp. “I need to go to the bathroom anyway.”

  “Me too.” Jo’s bladder was about to burst. “What time is it?”

  “Just after five thirty.” Anna got up. “I’ll go first, if that’s okay.”

  “Yes.” Jo’s heart pounded. She focused on the closed drapes, light shimmering through the cracks, and remembered she was in a resort with her mother and sister.

  Sam’s presence had seemed so real and the longing painfully strong. She fought back a sob and crawled out from under the covers, sitting on the edge of the bed in wait for the bathroom.

  Why did she have to dream about sex with Sam when she was finally starting to get herself back together? And to be so aroused once again was like a kick back to the starting line. Getting over Sam was going to be a lot harder than she thought. By the time Anna returned to bed, Jo had resolved to go for a sunrise jog along the beach. Maybe that would clear her head.

  Sam sat at her boarding gate, dressed for success and her adrenaline pumped for the day she hoped would define her future. Jo would probably still be in bed, as it was just past six in the morning. Excitement brought on an arousal that Sam needed to put aside until after the interview. Her focus had to be on getting the job. Nothing could happen without that.

  She decided to go for a walk around the airport to clear her head and try to relax. Families and business travelers bustled through the terminal and browsed the shops. Sam headed to a coffee shop to treat herself with some caffeine and a muffin to get through the early morning jitters.

  Two women stood in line in front of her. A lesbian couple, she was sure of it by the way they shared looks, touches, and smiles. Dressed in matching zip-off travel pants, hiking shoes, and waterproof jackets, they were probably off to some vacation destination with a sunny beach and warm weather. Sam envisioned walking along a sandy shoreline with Jo, planning their future together and making up for lost time on that ill-fated Toronto rendezvous. Perhaps they could head south for a romantic getaway near the end of February. If all went as planned with her day. It had to.

  Jo was the true planner, but Sam found herself piecing their lives together. An addition to the cottage would be necessary because she’d want it to be a family place where Jo’s relatives could visit. Her house in Toronto would be sold and some of the proceeds could go toward Jo’s mortgage, allowing Sam to own an equal share of their home. She’d help Jo switch her living room flooring and they’d christen it on some starry night after returning from walking Mollie. Life would be so good.

  She carried her coffee and muffin back to her boarding gate, glancing at the screen above the entrance to see a red alert. Her heart skipped a beat. The plane was delayed.

  Sam rushed to the counter where other passengers gathered to hear about the status of their flight. Panic set in as she learned that the plane had mechanical issues and an unknown departure time. Staring at the clock, Sam eased into a seat to control her breathing. Jaw tightening and teeth grinding, she put her muffin aside and focused on reciting case facts to calm her nerves. There was an hour to spare for her to make the interview on time and after that, there were no guarantees it would happen today. Things just had to go as planned.

  Jo broke into a sprint, with sand sliding like fresh snow under her shoes. A few other joggers were scattered along the shoreline, immersed in their own need for a morning run. The harder she pushed herself, the more Jo felt like her body was going to explode. Heart rate increasing and lungs about to burst, she screamed against the thrust of a large wave pounding the beach.

  A release of emotions, a mixed sentiment of longing for lost love and yearning to find happiness, brought on an adrenaline rush to satiate the unfulfilled orgasm of her dream. Why was Jan in the dream, berating her for making out in the shed with Sam? Jo shook her head. Had she really let go of Jan or was she still feeling guilty about loving someone else?

  It was her shed, dammit, and she could do whatever she wanted in it. Dreaming or not. It was time to finally let go of Jan. And Sam. When Jo got back to the room, she was ready for a cleansing shower and Anna was anxious to head for breakfast.

  “Hurry up or all the good tables will be full.” Anna flung a towel at her sister. “Just give your face a quick wipe and we can head to the dining hall.”

  “Where’s Mom?”

  “She’s taking a picture of the gardens out front.” Anna went to the patio door window. “Didn’t you see her?”

  “Why don’t the two of you go ahead and I’ll catch up?” Jo sifted through her clothes.

  “She’s not there anymore.” Anna slid one panel open. “Mom?”

  “Maybe she’s already on her way to the restaurant.”

  “No she isn’t because we were waiting for you.” Anna stuck her head outside. “Mother, where are you?”

  “I’m right here.” Their mother stepped into the room from the hallway and noticed Jo. “Oh good, you’re back. Let’s go, I’m hungry.”

  “I just need five minutes to rinse off.” Jo headed to the bathroom. “You can either wait or I’ll meet you there.”

  “We’ll wait.” Anna groaned as she sat on the edge of the bed. “We’re in a strange country and should be sticking together. And that includes getting up and going out for a run on your own in the middle of the night. Do you know how dangerous that is?”

  “It was early morning and I felt safe.”

  “Anna’s right,” Her mother sat in the corner chair, all but wagging a finger. “This isn’t the bush around Timmins and you don’t have Mollie with you. If it was safe, the guards wouldn’t have to carry around machine guns.”

  “I’ll be out in a minute.” Jo closed the bathroom door and sighed. The last thing she needed was to have her sister and mother gang up on her. The only security she worried about was keeping her heart protected from the likes of Samantha White. Jo stepped in the shower and willed Sam to wash down the drain with the soapsuds.

  Fifty minutes later, the plane was finally ready to depart. Boarding was rushed and Sam realized she should have visited the washroom one last time before leaving the terminal. Her uneaten carrot muffin fell on the floor as she lifted her carry-on luggage into the compartment above her seat. At least she’d had her coffee, but now her bladder was full and stomach empty.

  Sam always preferred a window seat. She liked to hunker down and watch the ground disappear during takeoff, ignoring the passenger in the seat beside her. This time it was an obese man smelling of stale cigarette smoke. It was going to be a long flight for the one and a half-hour estimated arrival time, especially since she couldn’t wait for the seat belt sign to be turned off and rush to the tiny bathroom.

  She watched as the plane climbed through the clouds and left the dreary Toronto weather for a sunny blue horizon high up in the sky. A dip of turbulence sent her stomach reeling more than it already was with her anticipation at seeing Jo. She had to forget about Jo and focus on interview questions. She’d save those feelings for later. They’d fall into each other’s arms and make love later that afternoon. Sam was sure of it.

  Chapter Forty-Three

  The plane circled over Timmins. Sam thought she saw Jo’s house in amongst the trees, but her sense of direction on the lay of the land around the city was still lacking. The sun shone and there was fresh snow on the ground. Everything looked pristine from so high up. It was going to be a good day. Sam just knew it as she hunched in front of the small window and smiled at her Timmins prospects.

  A new job where she could grow and expand her experience, maybe even open her own office one day, was exciting. Sam needed to ace that interview and claim the opening at Maxwell and Associates as hers. Confidence would be key, and she had to exude the ability to face any person or situation under duress. She would also need to demonstrate a keen interest in the firm and moving to Timmins.

  Sam was prepared to answer why she wanted to leave her large firm in Toronto for a small one in northern Ontario. She would focus on the cottage rather than risk revealin
g her real reason before things were settled with Jo. A family inheritance of a childhood vacation property near the city and a desire to experience life in the north would be her rationale.

  The wheels touched down with a jolt and Sam leaned back in her seat for one last moment of meditation. She closed her eyes and imagined petting Mollie. A smile hinted on her lips and her breathing was even. It was going to be an exhilarating day.

  Her rental car was ready and the drive into town was quick, leaving her an hour to spare before the interview. She had a strong urge to drive past Jo’s place but parked at a city meter then headed to a local restaurant for a bite to eat. A vegetarian wrap and glass of water graced her table. She was determined to give up eating meat for Jo.

  For the first time in her life, Sam realized that someone else’s desires had become more important than hers. She wanted to cradle Jo, soothe her pain, and begin the healing. And see her smile again, her barriers crumbling as she realized how much Sam loved her. Sam could hardly wait. She bit into her wrap, bringing her focus back to the fast-approaching interview time and reviewed her notes for one last time.

  “I really enjoyed that breakfast.” Anna rubbed sunscreen on her legs.

  Jo spread her towel on the chair. They were back at the beach, preparing for another leisurely day in the heat. “Is that all you’re thinking about here? What’s on the menu and how much you can eat?”

  “Of course not,” Anna said, “but the food is such a big part of an all-inclusive vacation like this. I’ve been dieting all year and want to let loose for a week. You should do the same. Even Mom said so.”

  Jo threw her book on the chair. “Here we go again. I’m going for a walk and the two of you can continue to join forces on me while I’m not here.”

  “Jo, it’s not like that.” Anna grabbed her sister’s arm. “A walk along the beach sounds like a good idea. Let’s meet Mom before she heads back up from the shore. We can go for a stroll now before the sun gets too hot.”