by Iona Rose
“Maybe it’s best if we don’t see each other for a while,” I say.
I think I see that flicker of anger again, but this time, it’s gone so quickly I really think I did imagine it.
“Yeah. Perhaps it is,” Jeremy agrees quietly.
Ok, this was awkward, but it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Maybe this is finally the closure Jeremy needs to really move on. Now he knows I’m into Aidan, surely he knows for sure there’s no chance for us.
He signals to our waitress and asks for the cheque. It’s become kind of awkward between us now and we sit in silence trying not to look at each other as we wait for her to come back. After a few moments, she comes back and places the bill on the table. We both reach for it, but I get it first. Jeremy shakes his head and holds his hand out.
“Come on Erika. I invited you here and put myself out there and you crushed my heart,” Jeremy says. He smiles like he’s joking, but his eyes say he isn’t. “At least let me keep a little dignity and buy your coffee.”
I sigh and hand over the bill. I’m not going to argue with him for the price of a cup of coffee and a slice of cake. Jeremy smiles as he takes it. He looks at it and drops some money down with it and we both stand up.
“Well … ummm … I’ll see you around then I guess,” I say as we move to the front of the café.
Jeremy nods.
“Yeah. See you around. And Erika? What I said before? I still mean it. If you need anything, call me. And if you change your mind about us, well, you know where I am,” he says.
I just nod my head. I won’t change my mind, but I don’t want to rub salt into his wounds so I’ll leave that part unsaid.
“Bye,” I say and then I turn and walk away, heading back towards the apartment before Jeremy can say anything else.
I reach the end of the block and glance back. A shiver goes through me when I see Jeremy still standing outside of the café, watching me as I walk away. I suddenly feel nervous and I pull my phone out of my pocket. I need to talk to someone as I walk home just to keep me from panicking.
I know I’m over reacting. It’s not like Jeremy was following me or anything. He was just watching me walk away, but I keep seeing that flash of anger on his face in the café and even the thought of him watching me walk away makes me feel unsettled.
I scroll through my contacts and find Jennifer’s number. It rings for ages and I’m just about to give up when she finally answers.
“Hey Erika. Sorry it took so long to answer. I couldn’t find my phone. It was down the back of the damned couch,” she says.
“The joys of motherhood,” I laugh.
“Yup,” she agrees. “So what’s up? You sound weird.”
I swear Jennifer knows me better than I know myself. I really thought my laughter and our standard joke about the joys of motherhood would cover the fact I was on edge. I wasn’t going to tell her what had just happened, I was just going to chat, but now I find myself wanting to tell her. I want to hear her opinion on it, and when she tells me I’m being paranoid and Jeremy is harmless, I know I’ll feel better.
“I went for a coffee with Jeremy,” I start.
“Oh Erika no,” Jennifer says.
“Just as friends,” I add quickly. “Or at least that’s what I thought it was. He told me he wants us to get back together.”
“You’re not actually considering it are you?” Jennifer asks. “What about the hot doctor?”
“Of course I’m not considering it. I ended it for a reason with Jeremy and nothing has changed. Besides, I’m so into Aidan. I can’t stop thinking about him.” I tail off for a moment as Aidan’s face swims in front of my mind’s eye for a moment. I catch myself and get back on topic. “For a second, when I told Jeremy about Aidan, there was this look on his face. Like not just anger. Actual rage. It was only there for a moment and I might have imagined it I guess, but I was terrified. And then as I walked away from him, he just stood there watching me and I was a bit unnerved so I thought I’d call you.”
I didn’t really mean to say that much, but once I started talking, it all just kind of tumbled out.
“He’s bad news Erika,” Jennifer says. “He always has been. It just took you a while to see it.”
I frown. I don’t know that I’ve decided Jeremy is bad news. I just don’t feel particularly attracted to him. And I had no idea Jennifer felt that way.
“I thought you liked him,” I say.
“I did at first,” Jennifer admits. “But then he started to isolate you from your friends. At first I thought it was just that rush of lust you have at the beginning of a relationship where you want to be with the person all the time, but then I started to put it together and I realized it was Jeremy who was keeping you away. But he was clever about it. I think he was anyway. I mean he never came out and said you couldn’t see your friends or go somewhere right?”
“Right,” I say.
I’m about to go on and tell Jennifer she’s gotten it all wrong. Jeremy was never a bad guy, he just wasn’t for me. She’s already talking again though.
“No, instead he would pretend he had planned a surprise for you and guilt trip you into staying home, and then your surprise ended up being something terrible like takeout and it was obvious it wasn’t anything Jeremy had planned. He was just manipulating you into being with him and only him.”
Is she right or is she just being cynical? I can’t decide. I mean Jeremy did have a habit of doing what she was saying he did, but he never pressured me to stay in. I mean he would even tell me that he had planned something but it wasn’t important and I should go out. I thought at the time that was so sweet and he really meant it, but now, I wonder if it was all part of the manipulation and I can’t help but wonder what his reaction would have been if one time I had said yes, I would still go out.
“Erika? You’re not upset with me are you? I’m just telling you how I saw it that’s all,” Jennifer says.
I realize I’ve been quiet for too long.
“No. I’m not upset,” I say. “I was just thinking. I always just took Jeremy at face value. I never pegged him as a manipulator. I’m still not sure I do.”
“That’s what made him so good at it. The fact no one would have suspected such a thing of him.”
“Hmm,” I say, still not totally convinced.
“Look it doesn’t matter,” Jennifer says. “But if you’re serious about Aidan, you can’t have Jeremy in your life potentially ruining things for you two. Just promise me you’ll stay away from Jeremy for that reason if nothing else.”
That I can do.
“Oh I will,” I say. “I’ve told him there’s no chance of getting back together and I’m going to go back to just ignoring the phone if he calls or anything again.”
“Good,” Jennifer says.
I hear a beeping sound in my ear and I pull the phone away for a second to look at the screen. Aidan is trying to get through.
“Jennifer?” I say, bringing the phone back to my ear. “Aidan is on the other line. Can …”
“Just go,” Jennifer laughs. “Take his call and forget all about Jeremy.”
She hangs up and I press answer on Aidan’s call.
“Hi,” I say.
“Hey,” he says.
He doesn’t sound happy to be talking to me. In fact, he sounds pissed off.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Something came up,” he says. “One of the doctors called in sick and I’m going to have to work late tonight. I’m really sorry but I’m going to have to cancel dinner.”
I feel myself deflating. I was really looking forward to seeing Aidan again tonight and going back to his place once he had finished work. It can’t be helped though. It’s not like he has the sort of job where he can just walk out when his shift is done. His job is life and death, and if he has to work late, he has to work late.
“Ok,” I say. “Maybe tomorrow instead?”
“You’re not mad?” Aidan asks, sounding
surprised.
“No of course not. I mean I’m disappointed, but I get it,” I say.
“Tomorrow it is then. And I’ll make tonight up to you,” he says.
“Now that sounds like a plan,” I say.
We chat for a few minutes and then Aidan has to go. By the time we’re done, I’m almost back at the apartment. I think for a moment and I come up with a plan. I turn around and walk back the way I have just come, heading for the store on the corner.
I go inside and buy a cooked chicken, some fresh bread, some ingredients for a salad and a small cheesecake. I pay and leave the store heading back to the apartment again.
If Aidan can’t come to dinner, then dinner will have to go to Aidan. I know he’ll be busy, but he must get a break, and when he does, I’ll be waiting and we’ll have a little romantic picnic in the break room.
I smile to myself as I go into the apartment and head to the kitchen to start preparing some chicken sandwiches and salads. Maybe it’ll be quiet enough that we might get to fool around after the picnic. God I hope so. I crave Aidan’s touch so much. I really don’t think I can wait until tomorrow to have him in my arms again.
Aidan
I can’t believe I have had to call Erika and cancel tonight. I was really looking forward to seeing her and I’m gutted I won’t be able to now. I’m also gutted that I’ve let her down already and it would have only been our second official date. She seemed to understand though which is something I guess. Still though, as six o’clock comes and goes and I know I should have been on my way to meet Erika outside of the hospital now, but instead am stuck at work, I feel a pang of regret.
I’m starting to think about what I can do tomorrow night to make tonight up to Erika when there’s a knock on my office door.
“Come in,” I call.
The door opens and Stacy limps in.
“What happened?” I ask, getting up to help her keep the weight off her foot.
“I slipped in the hall and fell. I think it’s just twisted, but would you mind taking a quick look at it?” she replies as I guide her into a chair.
“Sure,” I say. “No problem.”
I kneel down in front of her. She slips her shoe off and I gently begin to feel around her ankle. She winces slightly.
“Sorry,” I say.
“It’s ok,” she smiles. “For a nurse, I’m surprisingly bad with pain.”
“I think most of us are,” I laugh.
I keep feeling around her ankle. Nothing feels out of place and I move on to her actual foot, feeling over the top and bottom of it and around her heel. She giggles as I touch the bottom of her foot.
“That tickles,” she says.
She flexes her toes as I feel around her foot, rubbing them on my hand and I have a feeling it’s intentional.
“You know,” Stacy says, her voice light and amused. “I normally make a guy buy me dinner before he gets to feel me up like this.”
Oh the touch was intentional alright. I know Stacy is just making a joke though and it’s harmless, and so I play along, not really flirting back, but keeping the joke going.
“If you let guys feel you up like this, you’re doing it wrong,” I smile.
“Oh. And how should they be doing it?” Stacy says.
I glance up at her. She twirls a strand of hair around her finger and smiles down at me. I resist the urge to roll my eyes.
“I’m sure you can figure it out,” I say. I get to my feet, noting the look of disappointment on Stacy’s face. “Nothing’s broken. It’s just a light sprain. Let me grab a bandage and once we get your foot bandaged up, you’ll barely feel it.”
“Thanks,” she says.
I move over to a cabinet filled with supplies and grab a long ace bandage and a clip to fasten the bandage with. I move back to Stacy and kneel down between her knees again. A knock sounds on my door as I reach for Stacy’s foot.
“Come in,” I call.
I see Stacy’s expression change as the door opens. She isn’t pleased that we’re being interrupted. I peer around Stacy and smile with delight when I see Erika coming into my office.
“Oh I’m sorry. Am I interrupting something?” she says. “Your secretary said it was ok to come in.”
“No, its fine,” I tell her. “Come on in and grab a seat. I won’t be long. Stacy slipped and hurt her ankle in the hallway. I’m just bandaging it up for her.”
Erika moves closer to us and sits down behind my desk. She doesn’t look in the least bit impressed to find me on the ground between Stacy’s legs with her bare foot in my hand. Stacy looks equally unimpressed at having Erika join us. Somehow, I’ve gone from bandaging a foot to having both of these women pissed off at me for no real reason.
Stacy glances at Erika and her eyes widen for a second.
“I know you. You were a patient here weren’t you?” she says. “You were attacked in your home right?”
Erika nods her head. I would have preferred to keep this quiet around the hospital for a little longer, but technically, I’m doing nothing wrong and I’m so happy to see Erika here right now that I no longer care who knows about us.
“Dr Miller. Fraternising with your patients. How naughty,” Stacy says with fake shock.
“She isn’t my patient now,” I point out. “Nothing happened between us until after she had been discharged.”
“A likely story,” Stacy jokes. I open my mouth to tell her I’m being serious, but she goes on before I can. “So now you’re picking women up from the wards, I’ll have to keep an eye on bed nineteen. She’s pretty cute.”
Erika’s cheeks are beaming red and I feel pretty uncomfortable myself. I wrap the bandage more quickly, trying to just get it done and get Stacy away from my office before she manages to convince Erika I make a habit of dating my patients.
Stacy turns to Erika and winks at her.
“You know, I always thought Aidan only had eyes for me,” she says.
She laughs as she says it, but the laugh doesn’t sound entirely real. Erika gives a fake sounding laugh too. Its clear Stacy is making Erika feel uncomfortable and I have no idea what to say that won’t just make it worse so I keep quiet. I attach the fastener to the bandage and get up, practically jumping away from Stacy.
“All done,” I say.
Stacy pushes her foot back into her shoe and stands up. She gingerly tests her bad foot on the ground. She makes a moaning sound that wouldn’t be out of place in the bedroom and smiles at me.
“Thanks doc, that feels great,” she smiles.
“It’s just a bandage,” I say awkwardly.
“Oh come on, we both know it’s more than that,” she purrs.
“Huh?” I say, thrown completely by her statement.
I barely dare look at Erika but I risk a quick glance at her. She’s bright red, staring down into her lap. I don’t know if she’s upset or angry, but either way, I just want Stacy gone so I can try and salvage this situation.
Stacy giggles at my discomfort. She moves closer to me and bumps my hip with hers.
“You have magic hands,” she grins.
I laugh awkwardly and shuffle away from her.
“Well I’d better get back on the ward,” Stacy says. I feel myself relaxing slightly as she heads for the door. She pulls it open and turns back to me. “When we go for that drink, the first round is on me. As a thank you for fixing my foot.”
She slips away before I can say anything, pulling the door shut behind her. I turn to Erika who finally looks up at me.
“Well that was awkward,” I say, trying and failing to remove some of the tension I can see written all over Erika.
“Yes,” she agrees. “I should go. I’m clearly interrupting something.”
She stands up and I move around the desk, blocking her escape route.
“You’re not interrupting anything,” I say. “Stacy slipped and hurt her ankle that’s all.”
“Right,” Erika says. “And the flirting? I just imagined that?”
“No,” I admit. “But that’s just Stacy. It doesn’t mean anything Erika.”
“You’re going on a date with her,” Erika says. “That means it means something.”
I smile. I can’t help it. The idea of me choosing Stacy over Erika is the craziest thing I’ve heard in years, and I have to admit that I find her jealousy a little bit endearing. It’s good to know she would care if she thought I was going out with Stacy.
“Not in a million years,” I say. “Stacy asked me if I wanted to grab a drink after work the other night. I said no and she said some other time. I said sure to that because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. But it’s not going to happen. And even if it did, it wouldn’t be a date. It would be colleagues grabbing a quick drink together.”
“I’m not sure that’s the way she’d see it,” Erika comments.
I shrug.
“Who cares what anyone else thinks? As long as we know the truth,” I say.
I move closer to her and pull her into my arms. She resists my embrace ever so slightly at first and then she relents and softens against me, wrapping her arms around my waist. I kiss the top of her head.
“I swear to you Erika, I’m not into Stacy. Or anyone else for that matter. I know it’s a bit soon to say this, but I really like you and I don’t want to even think about dating anyone else right now,” I say.
She keeps her arms around me but she pulls her head back so she can look up at me.
“Right answer,” she smiles.
I lean down and kiss her, this time on the lips. Instantly fire floods my body and I can feel my cock responding to the taste of Erika’s mouth. I want nothing more than to swipe the desk clean, throw Erika on top of it, and make love to her. I resist the urge. The place is busy and there’s always a chance I’ll be needed and someone will come to grab me. Not only would it be embarrassing if they caught me and Erika fucking, it could also slow my reaction down enough to cost a life in an emergency situation.
With that in mind, I gently pull my lips away from Erika’s. Her eyes open and she peers at me with a smile.