A Guide to Vampire Hunting: ...and other failures (Alchemy Inc. Book 1)

by Janus Alexander

  The weather had taken a turn for the frigid in the last days and Amelia hunched in her biker jacket, shoving her hands as deeply into the pockets as possible. A shiver worked its way down her spine as she passed a darkened alley and she glanced down it finding nothing amiss. Somehow she still knew she was being watched.

  Not by Nikolais or his clan, but by someone else. She figured it was Kristoff - the presence was warm and comforting and every time she felt it she tried not to let it drag her back down and straight to him.

  When she reached the Dancing Mage she pushed through the old wood and glass door into its yellow light out of the cold. The smells of beer, cigarettes, cheap whiskey and sweat greeted her. The Dancing Mage was a popular spot for ex-patriots of the UK and was often busy at all hours - which seemed to leave the staff little time to clean. Her shoes stuck to the floor a bit as she walked over the warped wood floor to the bar. Hitching herself up on a scarred stool, Amelia took her coat off and gestured to the bar tender for a pint of Guinness. When he brought it to her Amelia grabbed his wrist to keep him from moving away. “Have you seen Jack?” she whispered.

  The bartender rubbed his chin, bristling with a grey scrub of five o’clock shadow. “I seem to think I may have seen the blighter. Who’s asking?”

  “I’m Amelia Dagda - his roommate.”

  “Ah! Yes, I was told to be on the look out for ye. Are you hungry?”

  “Not really.”

  “Ah love, you’re skin and bones, you MUST be hungry.”

  “No, I am not…I mean, yes, starved,” Amelia replied confused but catching on.

  “Well then let me take you upstairs to see my missus, she’s got shepherd’s pie in the oven and I can leave you with her a mite until I can talk about your missing bloke.”

  “O-K.”

  Amelia followed the man around the pitted wood bar’s curve and to a chained off landing for the stairs to the second floor. Moving the chain, the bartender led her to the second floor of the pub and gestured to a rickety white wood door. “I’ll warn ya now,” he said with a twinkle in his eye. “The missus ain’t much of a cook…”

  Beneath the door a blue light streamed and the strangled strains of Radiohead oozed out. “Of course,” Amelia said with a smile. “I’m just grateful for your hospitality.”

  The grizzled man gave a nod and went back down the stairs. Amelia lifted her hand to knock on the door. But before her knuckles made contact a small round hole opened at the top of the door and what seemed to be an android eyeball popped out and looked at her. For a moment a green light emitted from the eye and scanned Amelia, then the eye retreated back into its hole and the door opened with a click.

  The interior was both what she expected from Jack - but not at all what she would have thought to find on top of a pub. The room was steel walled and filled with tables and parts like a mad scientist’s lab. The lights were green and blue to reduce the visual footprint and they reflected off of sheered pieces of steel and curving parts of titanium - parts for what seemed to be weapons.

  “Hello?” Amelia called, picking her way through fallen ram and frayed wire. “Jack?”

  The music stopped and Jack came sliding out from a room off to the corner, wheeling towards her in his usual ergonomically-correct computer chair. The minute he got close to her he jumped to his feet and hugged her. Amelia, surprised, hugged him back. But as quickly as the spontaneous show of affection occurred, Jack stiffened and pulled away awkwardly.

  “So, it looks like you survived vampire-geddon.”

  “What?” Amelia asked. “Vampire-geddon?”

  “Whenever two factions of powerful vampires collide it’s never safe for us humans. And that Nikolais is a vicious one.”

  Amelia pulled away from Jack in shock, “YOU KNEW? You knew who Kristoff was? WHAT he was?”

  “Sure, didn’t you? I all but told you!”

  “The operative word is “but” - you didn’t say it at all. And if your jokes about wine were supposed to be hints I never want to play charades with you ever.”

  “Eh, all’s well that ends well. Right?” Jack chirped. “I noticed the Kuryakins’ helped out with the clean-up of the apartment. Rather gracious of them.” He walked to a small refrigerator off in the corner and pulled out a Code Red. “You’re over all that now, right? They fixed the apartment and then left you alone…”

  Amelia fought a mix of hurt and annoyance. “Yes.”

  Jack guzzled half the bottle in one breath. “Isn’t that good? I mean, you’re not around vampires anymore.”

  Amelia silently looked Jack over, his 6’5 wiry frame and shaggy dark chocolate brown hair, he was a witch. He was attractive. Why hadn’t she ever been interested in him? Jack cocked his head. “Amelia, luv? Kristoff’s gone, aren’t you happy?”

  “…no.”

  Jack’s eyes shot wide in disbelief, “But he lied to you and he’s a vampire and he manipulated you and slept with you under false pretenses and HE’S A VAMPIRE.”

  “Is it true there are vampires on the ruling council in Europe?”

  “…Yes. The Kuryakins are on the Council.”

  “Do you think they should be? Aren’t all vampires evil?”

  Jack snorted and finished the Mountain Dew. “Self centered? Vain? Destructive? Yes. Evil? No. No more than any other average spoiled rich kid.”

  “You’re a spoiled rich kid.”

  “Yes, but I’m just handsome - I don’t have preternaturally surreal good looks, the strength of 20 men on steroids and the knowledge that I can probably take down a male African lion with my manicure.”

  “So, you don’t like vampires because you think they’re stuck up.”

  “Stuck up, morally challenged, way too powerful - and god they’re arrogant. They think everyone is a sheep and they’re both the big bad wolf preying on us and the big bad hunter saving us as well. What the vampire giveth he may taketh away-ith.”

  “This is an ego thing.”

  Jack shrugged and tossed the empty bottle at the trash, missed, and walked backward towards his little glowing closet. “You say to-ma-toe, I say sparkly arsehole. Isn’t it the same in the end?”

  Amelia watched as he vanished back into his hole, was there really no vampire-witch war in other countries? “Hey,” she called after a moment. “Can I stay a little longer in your flat?”

  “Eh.” Jack called back from within, the strains of Flyleaf coming on. “You can have it. Council vamps know where it is now and they’ll just pester me for toys. I’ll send you the deed to the building. Now, as much as I adore you luv, I’m busy. Show yourself out.” The door to the small room slammed cutting off most of the blue light.

  She apparently now owned an apartment building - a crappy apartment building, which was to be expected since Jack had owned it - but she’d never have to pay rent again. In fact, she’d be charging other people rent. She might even make enough in rent that she could go back and finish her art degree…

  Amelia tromped back down the rickety wood stairs to the bar and the bartender looked up. “You get that pie?”

  Amelia snorted. “Yeah, andI’m not hungry anymore.”

  The next day, filled with conflict, Amelia went out to her parent’s house. She wanted to talk to her dad. And it was time she told her mother all about Gianni and Nikolais, and … her and Kristoff. But first, she wanted to talk to her dad.

  The night wind was bitter with winter finally there, and Amelia hunched into her leather coat, it still had the rip where that child-vampire had stabbed her. She didn’t have the money yet - or the inclination - to replace the coat anyway. It was like a badge of honor. When she reached her childhood home, Amelia stood outside for several moments, just looking in on the pretty gold light shining out from the rectangular windows. It looked welcoming, but she doubted she’d be welcomed there again after what she had to tell her mother.

  Maybe her dad would agree to keep seeing her in private, he surely wouldn’t abandon her for her mistakes.
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br />   Instead of letting herself in, Amelia knocked, somehow she felt she no longer had the right to come in uninvited anymore. Then she held her breath hoping that her dad would be the one to answer. The door eventually creaked open letting light spill out onto the darkened street. “Why Amelia,” Came her father’s voice to her relief. “It’s been so long, and I’ve been so worried. Come in, let’s have tea and chat a bit to catch up.”

  “Thanks dad, that sounds great,” Amelia sighed out deeply in relief. She noticed that most of the back of the house was dark except for the observatory where her father always stayed. “So where’s mom?”

  “Oh, you know. Plotting. Apparently the Italian clan of vampires in Hell’s Kitchen just fell and the Russians are trying to take it over…Her usual,” he said this dismissively with a wave. “Now let me get the kettle brewing and we’ll settle in for a nice talk.”

  Amelia shrugged her coat off and put it over the back of one of his beaten leather armchairs, then joined him by the kettle. They worked side by side in silence. Amelia spooning out mint tea into mugs, and her father filling the kettle and lighting the range. “Something’s bothering you,” He said. Amelia just nodded her head. “Is it serious?”

  “You could say that.”

  “You can always tell me,” he soothed. Amelia smiled at him sadly. The whistle blew and her father poured the tea, then they retired to the observatory to drink it.

  Carefully they both settled into the armchairs and cradled their cups, Amelia stared at hers for several minutes before she could even figure out how to start.

  “You remember that eccentric rich guy I was helping with art?” Amelia started carefully. “Well he turned out to be a vampire.”

  Her father cocked his eyebrow. “How long did it take you to figure that out?”

  “Somewhere after I slept with him and when we avenged Mona,” she replied looking away.

  “Amelia, I love you, but I think you have a lot to tell me.”

  Amelia cupped her mug between her hands and blew at the steam. “So, you know how Mom said Mona was killed by the Russian clan leader Nikolais?” Her father nodded warily. “Well she wasn’t. She was actually sleeping with him. They were lovers. And Kristoff - my former employer - is his brother. But when I met Nikolais, I didn’t know who he was, and he was just this charming painter that I became friends with. He’d even painted a portrait of Mona - I didn’t recognize her at the time.”

  “Was it good?”

  Amelia smirked, “I just told you my vampire hunter sister, who lived to hunt, was sleeping with the head of the Russian vampire clans and you want to know if he paints well?” Amelia paused and sipped her tea, her gaze went distant. “Well then the best answer would be yes, he’s very good. He did one of me as well…Now he has a matching set,” she finished snorted bitterly.

  “So how did you not know who he was?”

  “Well, when he was introduced to me it was as Kolya - Kristoff’s twin brother. And since I saw Kristoff during the day, I assumed Kolya was human too…I mean I assumed Kristoff was human so I thought Kolya was too. He wasn’t of course.”

  Her father raised his eyebrows, “How does that work?”

  “Well, Kolya…Nikolais…eventually explained that they were from a mixed family of hunter witches and vampires, and into each generation a hunter is born. A vampire with the power to walk in daylight and command some magic, called to hunt vampires that cross the line. Kolya also has power from the breeding, he’s some sort of vampire mage…he used some of his influence on me so I can attest to how powerful he is.”

  “What can he do?”

  “I don’t know what all he can do, but he’s very good at entrancing. He paused me like a video with a simple command and then he knocked me out without touching me.”

  “I thought you were friends?”

  “We were…”

  “What happened?”

  “I broke Kristoff’s heart - supposedly. And Kolya - Nikolais - didn’t appreciate it. In retaliation he threatened to turn me.” Amelia replied ruefully.

  “While his reaction seems extreme. I suppose I can see why he wasn’t very happy with you.”

  “What? You’re supposed to be on my side!”

  “Well he obviously didn’t turn you,” her father pointed out.

  “That’s because Kristoff saved me!”

  Her father raised an eyebrow but seemed to let the subject drop. “If you slept with this Kristoff, I must imagine you at least cared for him in return, so rejecting him for being of mixed blood surely must have hurt him greatly,” her father said a little too reasonably.

  “But he’s a vampire.”

  “Let’s backtrack,” her father replied. “So Kristoff was a hunter, I therefore suspect you used him to get your revenge for Mona.”

  “He was using me too…at least in the beginning. Nikolias wanted to know more about Mona’s murder for his revenge and Kristoff was helping him… But he helped train me…and helped me take down Mona’s real killer, a vampire by the name of Gianni. Gianni ran the Italian clan out of Hell’s Kitchen.”

  “So you killed the man who murdered Mona.”

  Amelia looked sheepish, “No, Kolya did.”

  “Why would he do that?” Her father asked, with an obvious point coming.

  “To avenge Mona I guess.”

  “Then he must have cared for her deeply, not your average description of a vampire.”

  “I suppose he cared for her in his own way… Kolya doesn’t let people in easily. But when he does, he’ll do anything for you.”

  “Did he let you in?”

  “He told me I was his friend if that’s what you mean…”

  “So he may have taken your disgust almost as badly as Kristoff must have - if he is such a person.”

  Amelia thought back to her confrontation with Kolya…Nikolais…dammit…in the warehouse, he had seemed disappointed before he had gotten enraged. Then when they’d had their fight at the clan’s home, he seemed angry and even betrayed but reluctant to force her into anything. But he’d never acted as if he’d hurt her, or kill her- other than turning, and he had even attempted to feed her in his home after he’d captured her. “Maybe,” Amelia answered her father hesitantly.

  “So let me get this straight, the person you were working for - being paid to help with his art, fell in love with you - and obviously you him. And then he defied his brother’s plans for you to help in his revenge and took the time to work with you to avenge your sister. Helped you do so, and you have denied him because he’s a vampire.”

  “Of course!”

  “Why would you do that? Did he hurt you?”

  “He lied to me!” Amelia said vengefully, “He knew who I was all along, he tricked me and put me in Kolya’s way.”

  “Would you have let him help you otherwise, let him be around you? Would you have continued to blame Kolya - the wrong man - for your sister’s murder? Would you have finally learned how to defend yourself and others? Yes, he lied. But did he have a reason? Was it perhaps because you would shun him - try to kill him and his brother?” her father continued more forcefully. “If you were in his shoes, and you cared for someone who you knew could not accept you for who you were, would you have done the same?”

  Amelia opened her mouth to deny that she would have, but fell silent. After he’d gotten the information he’d wanted, Kristoff had had little to gain from spending time with her. She had had everything to gain. At first he must have been using her to learn about Mona’s death - but soon it had clearly been about their relationship and nothing else. He had insisted, even with his last kiss, that he loved her. He fought vampires just as she did. What was her real problem? Her mother had been wrong, Kristoff and Kolya were not possessed by demons, they were born the way they were. They had their own moral code - and while it was different - it still had honor. Particularly, Kristoff had honor.

  And Mona would never have loved Kolya if he hadn’t been worthy in her mind.
/>   Was Mona killed for it?

  Amelia grew pensive. “Dad, if Kolya didn’t kill Mona, and Gianni did, why? I can’t figure it out. What did Gianni have to do with it? How did he even become involved? Was it revenge on Kolya?”

  Her father rubbed his chin, “These are all good questions, but now that I’ve heard everything, I don’t know what to say. Except perhaps to remind you that if Mona, of all people, could love Kolya, why couldn’t you accept being in love with his brother?”

  “Because it’s an abomination!” Came her mother’s livid voice from the kitchen. “I did everything for that girl, trained her to be the best! And the little slut went out and slept with the worst of them!” Amelia jolted from her chair and turned to stare back at her mother.

  “You knew,” Amelia said appalled. “And you still told me it was Kolya?”

  “Now it’s Kolya is it?” Ann laughed bitterly. “It may as well have been the beast,” her mother snarled. “It was only so long before he’d grow bored of her and pervert her the way he was.”

  Amelia glared at her mother, “And how did Gianni come into it?”

  “Yes, how did Gianni come into it?” came a frightfully calm voice.

  And Kolya strolled casually in through the front door.

  Chapter 34

  “You! How did you come in!? You shouldn’t be here!” Amelia’s mother growled lividly. Kolya walked in measured steps over to where Amelia and her father were still in the observatory, and he nodded a greeting to Amelia. Amelia was confused, what was he doing here? “You followed her! My disgrace of a daughter, she led you here didn’t she?!” Ann yelled shrilly.

  Kolya leaned back on his heels and put his hands in his pockets, his hair was back in its usual long sleek braid. He looked so self possessed Amelia could almost forget his persona of Nikolais and see him as only her Kolya.