“I would think she would want to sleep if she’s working two jobs every day,” I commented just as we reached Mila, and I hugged my sister tight.
“I want to hear all about Rome,” she grumbled when she leaned back, but then concern filled her gray eyes. “You look green, Mon.”
“Turbulence,” I muttered. “It was bad. My stomach is still rolling.”
“Let’s get you home. You can tell us about the trip later.” Leaving Maverick to load my bags into the back of the SUV, she opened the front door for me and waited for me to get in before climbing into the back seat.
The entire ride home, Maverick and Mila told me about their summer so far. Maverick had been apprenticing for Daddy since we all turned eighteen, and he seemed to enjoy working at the shop. Of course, River had been dropping by more often than not to “help.” Mila winked at me from the back seat when we shared a look. River might be our honorary cousin, but we both knew she was going to be our sister-in-law one day.
Seeing how happy my brother was whenever River’s name was mentioned only made me miss Gian more. “Oh God,” I moaned. “Mav, pull over!”
He jerked to the side of the interstate with a screech of tires, and I barely had time to open the door before throwing up. The other two got out and came to comfort me, Mila holding my hair out of my face while Maverick rubbed my back until the dry heaves stopped and I leaned weakly against my brother.
Tears spilled down my face as I silently begged Gian to hurry up and finish whatever the hell he was doing. I didn’t like missing him, and apparently my stomach wasn’t a fan of it either.
◆◆◆
The nausea didn’t go away.
If anything, it only got worse. And the more I missed Gian, the harder it was to keep things in my stomach.
Whimpering as I wiped sweat from my brow after having spent the last ten minutes with my head in the toilet, I glanced at the pregnancy test I’d picked up at the grocery store that morning. Thankfully, they had self-checkouts, and I hadn’t had to deal with the judgmental stares of the cashier when I bought the damned thing.
I’d peed on the stick before the nausea had hit me again, and I hadn’t had time to check it. Picking it up, I gasped when I saw the little digital screen with the glaring PREGNANT reading on it.
My hand went to my abdomen, and fresh tears burned my eyes. I’d been crying a lot since getting back from Rome. With each passing day that there was no sign of Gian, my heart broke a little more. I’d thought that was why my stomach continued to stay upset until I realized I couldn’t remember when my last period was.
Dropping the pregnancy test on the bathroom floor, I wrapped my free hand around the medallion I never took off. “Gian,” I whispered, feeling a mixture of scared and in utter awe at the realization that a part of the man I loved was growing inside me right that moment. “We’re going to have a baby.”
And he wasn’t there to tell me it was going to be okay. There was no one to tell me I had no reason to be scared, to reassure me that the baby and I would be okay because Gian would always love and protect us both. Any excitement I might have felt was diminished at the realization that I might have to raise this baby all on my own.
“Please,” I whispered into the quiet bathroom, clutching the medallion like a lifeline. “I love you, Gian. I need you—we need you. Come back for us.”
But as I sat on the bathroom floor, praying for him to suddenly appear, I knew he wasn’t coming. Not yet. Something had to be stopping him from coming back to me. He wouldn’t abandon me. He loved me. The words might never have been spoken by him—might not ever come from his lips—but I knew they were true.
They had to be.
Until I saw him again, however, I needed to do something far scarier than simply raise a baby on my own.
Tell my dad.
Chapter 11
Monroe
I helped Mom set the table for dinner, but I didn’t know if I could stomach anything she had cooked. It seemed morning sickness was no joke, and I was going to be one of the unlucky ones who got hit hard by it.
On top of that, the baby apparently didn’t like how nervous I was, and I could already feel the sweat beginning to bead on my upper lip as I fought the nausea that caused my stomach to toss like an angry sea during a storm.
“How were classes today, honey?” Mom asked as she placed the salad on the table and went back for the rolls and baked chicken.
“Oh, you know,” I said with a shrug as I took my place at the table. “I saw a few of the people I graduated with, but no one wanted to talk to me or sit with me. The professors were all decent, though.”
“Good, good,” she said distractedly, picking up her phone to check it for the third time in as many minutes.
“Is something wrong?” I asked cautiously. She’d been acting spaced-out since she got home, and I couldn’t help worrying it was because of Lyric Thornton opening a new ink shop close to campus. Was Daddy’s business in trouble and they just hadn’t let us kids know the full extent of how bad it really was?
I’d been so lost in my own miserable world that I hadn’t given it much thought when my parents sat the three of us down and told us someone was trying to buy in to Daddy’s business. They brushed it off like it was nothing when they explained a new shop was opening up and told us not to worry.
But I wasn’t so sure if we should be worried or not. Maybe Lyric was there to cause trouble for Daddy. It wasn’t that I was concerned my parents would lose their livelihood, because I wasn’t blind to the fact that the shop was not their primary source of income. But I knew Daddy loved that place and would be lost without it.
And if they were already upset over what was going on with work, it wasn’t going to make what I had to tell them any easier.
What was I going to say? “Oh hey, I know you are stressing over other things right now, but you’re going to be grandparents. So, yeah, there’s that.”
More than that, what the hell was I going to tell them when they asked about Gian? Should I just get it out of the way and tell them who the baby’s father is? Confess everything, including the fact that he’d been protecting me over the years? Yes, that would be in his favor, but the fact that he was nowhere to be found at the moment would probably cancel out the good in my dad’s eyes.
I heard Daddy’s motorcycle pull into the driveway, and my nausea doubled as my anxiety climbed higher and higher.
Just do it, I scolded myself silently. Tell them about the baby, and worry about everything else later.
With that plan firmly in mind, I went to wash my hands and splashed some cold water on my face in the hope of alleviating some of the nausea trying to kick my ass. By the time I got back, Daddy was sitting at his place at the table, and Mom was seated beside him.
“It’s just us tonight, sweetheart,” Mom said as she scooped mashed potatoes onto her plate.
At least I had that in my favor, I mused as I sat down and folded my hands in my lap. Having Maverick and Mila there to hear my confession wouldn’t have made what I had to say any easier. Maverick was likely to freak out just as badly as I feared Daddy would, and I knew Mila would guess exactly who the baby’s father was before I even got out all of what I had to say.
My parents dished food onto their plates, passing me the serving platters as they went. I took a little salad and chicken, but I knew I wasn’t going to eat a single bite and didn’t even bother to pick up my knife or fork.
“Aren’t you hungry?” Mom asked as she took a bite, her brow furrowed as she narrowed her eyes on me.
Daddy’s gaze jerked to my plate, and his nostrils flared. “You need to eat, Monroe.”
“I’m not feeling well,” I admitted. “Actually… Um… I need to tell you two something.”
Daddy dropped his fork onto his plate, his dark eyes zeroing in on me like a predator. But his voice was soft when he spoke. I hated when he was calm like he was right then. He was at his most dangerous when he was like that. And it wa
sn’t that I was scared of him hurting me, but more of not knowing how he was going to take the news of being a grandfather—and how he would kill Gian if he got his hands on him. “What is it, sweetheart? Are you sick? Do you need to go to the doctor?”
“No, no,” I rushed to assure him. “It’s just an upset stomach.”
“Is there a bug going around campus?” Mom asked with concern. “I realize it’s only the first week of school, but germs travel fast and I’m sure half those boys still don’t wash their hands like they should.”
“It’s not a bug,” I said with a heavy sigh. “I’m…pregnant.” The last word came out barely above a whisper, and I closed my eyes, waiting for the explosion.
But several long moments passed with no reaction, and I forced myself to look at my parents and release the breath I’d been holding. Mom sat there with her mouth slightly agape, her eyes wide yet sparkling. Daddy, on the other hand, was pale as death, his hands balled into fists on the table and his eyes so wild he looked feral.
“You’re sure?” Daddy bit out.
I swallowed with difficulty and nodded.
“Honey, are you okay?” Mom rushed to ask once the shock of my announcement began to fade.
“Just some morning sickness,” I told her in a voice that sounded weak to my own ears. I cleared my throat, trying to put on a braver facade. “I took a test earlier, and I wanted you two to know first. I-I will set up an appointment soon to get everything checked out. I just wanted to keep you both in the loop.”
Mom looked at Daddy for a long moment when he continued to remain quiet. Shaking her head at him, she turned her gaze back to me. “And the father? Does he know?”
Out of habit, I wrapped my fingers around my medallion. “I…I don’t know how to contact him. We… We hooked up in Italy, and it was only supposed to be a summer thing,” I lied easily, praying Gian would forgive me. If he were even listening in. I only wanted to protect him from Daddy’s wrath a little longer. Plus, there was one other person I wanted to tell about Gian before I confessed everything to my parents. “I’ll try to find him on social media, but I’m not going to hold my breath. It’s okay, though,” I told her with a tiny smile. “The baby and I will be just fine if the father doesn’t want anything to do with us.”
“Of course you will be!” Mom reached across the table and squeezed my free hand. “You have absolutely nothing to worry about, Monroe. Your father and I will make sure you and the baby are taken care of. Won’t we, James?”
“Yes,” he half growled. Pushing his plate away, he stood. “Excuse me,” he muttered and stomped out of the dining room.
As soon as he was gone, I released a relieved breath, and I didn’t even flinch when I heard their bedroom door slam shut so hard, it felt like the entire house shook from the force.
It was over. I’d told them about the baby, and the house was still standing. No one was crying. No blood had been shed—though I hadn’t really feared that since Gian wasn’t there.
I would call the whole thing a win.
For now.
◆◆◆
Even tired from getting no sleep the night before, Lexa was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen in my life. The scar on her face wasn’t something I ever noticed when I looked at her, and since she’d married Ben, she’d stopped covering up that side of her face so much.
As soon as I walked through the door of Lexa’s house, she handed me her son, and I took him happily. Rubbing my nose against his made him coo up at me, but I knew better than to kiss his adorable cheek. Aunt Raven would tear anyone who kissed on her only grandson’s face into a million pieces for daring to spread unknown germs to him when he had next to zero immune system.
The one and only person who tried to kiss Finn when he was only a few days was still walking with a limp, from what my brother told me on the way home from the airport the day I returned from Rome.
“Please overlook the mess,” Lexa muttered as she straightened up a pile of freshly washed onesies and baby blankets on the couch.
Other than that, however, there wasn’t much of a mess anywhere. A bassinet was positioned beside the couch, and obvious proof that my one and only biological cousin had been taking a nap earlier came from the pillow and blanket that was folded in one of the chairs. A baby swing sat in front of the television that wasn’t on, and an empty plate was on the coffee table, but that wasn’t a mess.
Yawning, Lexa patted the couch cushion beside her, beckoning me to sit. Cradling Finn closer, I did.
“I’m so glad you stopped by,” Lexa said with a tired smile. “We haven’t had much time to chat, not even at the family dinner the other night Mom held to welcome the rockers. Tell me all about your adventure in Italy.”
Finn’s eyes looked heavy, and I reluctantly stood to place him in his bassinet, knowing I needed my hands completely free for what I needed to tell his mommy. Once he was tucked in and drifting off to sleep, I returned to sit beside Lexa and started telling her about all the amazing sights I’d seen.
But soon, the topic changed to how I was feeling. Everyone knew I was pregnant now, so of course Lexa wanted to know how I was handling the pregnancy.
“The morning sickness is starting to ease up,” I told her. “And it seems I have a huge sweet tooth now.”
“My cravings started early too,” she said with a sigh. “Thank goodness Ben likes to indulge me, or he might have lost his mind with all the two a.m. trips for fast food. One day, I wanted wings so bad, and he drove an hour and a half just to get the ones I couldn’t stop talking about.”
“Aww. Ben’s so sweet.” I knew if Gian were with me, he would do that too. I’d been craving one of the decadent desserts we’d had one night in Rome. I’d tried to make it on my own a few nights before, but it didn’t taste the same, and I was still craving it so badly, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
“How are you holding up, though?” Lexa asked, unknowingly jumping on to the topic I’d come there to talk to her about in the first place. “I mean, it must be scary going through all of this alone. I have Ben to help me, and I’m still scared. So, I can’t even imagine what is going through your mind.”
“Actually…” I paused, trying to regroup so I could put everything I had into convincing her Gian was a good guy. “I have to tell you something, Lexa. And I really, really need you to keep an open mind. I know it’s going to be hard for you, but please try. For me.”
“Okay, you have me worried, Mon.” She laughed, but I heard the nervousness under the surface.
“You know that whole proverb about the sins of the father and how you shouldn’t place one man’s guilt on his children?” She nodded, her eyes narrowing on me. “I really need you to keep that in mind.”
“My mind is open, Monroe. Now tell me why that would have anything to do with your baby.”
I wrapped my fingers around the medallion, and I sucked in a deep breath to center myself. “Remember when Tavia’s uncle gave me a concussion?” Again, she nodded. “And the guy who saved me?”
“The stalker?” she exclaimed. “You hooked up with your stalker?”
“He’s not a stalker,” I snipped at her before slowly inhaling. “He’s not like that. G was only protecting me. He saved me over and over again. And considering he saved you and Tavia that day as well, you don’t get to judge him either.”
She held up her hands. “Okay, okay. I get it. You’re protective of this guy. I’m sorry. Please continue.”
“I love him, Lexa,” I confessed, putting my entire heart in every word. “It started out as a crush, I admit that. Infatuation with the guy who was my own personal superhero. But it grew into so much more. I love him more than anything or anyone. He’s the other half of my soul, and I…I can’t live without him.”
Her metallic-blue eyes softened before narrowing once again. “If you love him so much, where the hell is he?”
“We did hook up in Rome, and it was the best time of my life. But I came home alone.”
Not a lie. I just couldn’t tell her the whole truth. She wouldn’t understand. Hell, I didn’t even understand, but I had to stay positive that Gian would come back for me. “I needed to talk to you and my parents. Get you all on board to show him that we stand a chance.”
“Like you said, this guy has protected you over the years, Mon.” She shrugged. “Why wouldn’t we be on board with you being with a guy who can obviously take care of you?”
“G is Gian Fontana,” I whispered, keeping my eyes glued to her face.
Lexa went deathly pale at the mention of his name. “No,” she breathed, then jumped to her feet. Frantically, she looked around the room, then moved closer to Finn’s bassinet. “No,” she repeated, her voice growing stronger. “You can’t be in love with him. He’s a monster, Monroe. Every person in that family is.”
“No,” I cried. “He’s not like any of those evil bastards. Gian is a good man, Lexa. I swear to you, he would never harm you or anyone else I love.”
“You’re delusional!” she snapped at me. “This guy is playing games with you, Mon. He made you fall in love with him. You’re brainwashed or something. This is a game to him. A man like him, he’s incapable of loving you. In any way. They are all sociopaths. Killers. Monsters.”
“You’ve never even met him,” I reminded her, blinking back tears of frustration.
“I don’t need to meet him to know what he’s like.” With noticeably trembling fingers, she touched her scar. “Stay away from him, Monroe. Don’t let him near you or your baby ever again. He will turn your child into a monster just like the rest of them.”
Tears spilled down my cheeks. “No,” I denied. “He loves me. Gian would do anything to protect me. Yes, I’ll admit he’s a hard man, but so is my dad. Just like your dad. But he isn’t bad. He feels things just like you and me. He has compassion and love in him. And I know that he hates himself for sharing DNA with the man who hurt you. Please, Lexa. I know this is a lot to take in, but give him a chance. He… He suffered too.” I blinked back tears, remembering everything Gian confessed to me about his time with his father before Enzo was killed. “You’re not the only one with scars. When Gian was five, his father hit him with a glass bottle. It shattered and nearly took out his eye. He has a scar that goes from his brow down to his cheek.”
Surviving His Scars (Angels Halo MC Next Gen Book 4) Page 7