by Jill Cooper
I glance at him out of the corner of my eye. He’s watching the movie, gently chewing on some popcorn. I relax closer to him, and Ryan edges closer, too. The center console of the car keeps us from getting too close, which could be a good thing, or it could be a bad thing. The jury is still out on that one, but he smells nice.
I try to focus on the movie, but it’s hard from how fast my heart is racing. Ryan places his hand on my thigh, and he slides it up higher. I’m guessing he’s having trouble concentrating on the movie, too. It’s our first date, we barely know each other, but I really want him to like me. And I really, really want to kiss him.
We come nose to nose when I turn to face him. “Ryan…”
He places his hand behind my neck and quietly shushes me. He kisses my lips gently, and I close my eyes as he pulls me in closer. The kiss grows more passionate as his hand goes beneath my sweater and finds the skin of my abdomen. His lips travel down from my lip to my chin and to my neck. He exhales hotly against my skin, and I’m ripe with passion and goosebumps.
Both his hands fish under my sweater in the back, and when his fingers play with my bra strap, I back away toward the door. He startles. “What’s the matter?”
“It’s just…moving too fast.”
“I know you like me, Chase.” He whispers it against my neck, his hand on my waist squeezing me closer.
There’s no denying the rush of tingles I get when his lips meet the soft skin of my neck. “We just met and…” And I don’t want him to take off my bra at the drive-in, but I feel like I don’t have a choice but to say yes if he pushes.
Ryan smiles. “C’mon, Jess. I asked you to the drive-in. You said yes. We’ll be this year’s It homecoming couple. What did you think we were going to do?”
“Watch a movie.” I bite my lip, and somehow the truth sounds so stupid and juvenile, but I don’t want to have sex with someone I just met, in the front seat of his car.
He splays his hand on the steering wheel, and his fingers curl tightly around it. His shoulders are rounded, and his eyes are darker than they were before. I thought he was a nice guy, but now I’m scared he might not be.
“I brought you to the Chetwood mansion and protected you that night. Remember?”
How could I forget? Then a realization struck. “Is that why you’ve been so nice? Because you thought you’d get me alone and…you’d be able to get some?”
Ryan snorts. “We’re in high school. I just want to live a little, but if you want to play Nancy Drew, well…that can be kind of hot.” He plays with my braid, and I shudder. “Sexy schoolgirl, a little mystery.”
I bristle on the inside. Alarms blare in my head, and I fight the urge to run. “I think it’d be better if you take me home now.”
“Home?” His lip snarls, and he’s no longer the cute guy I thought he was. I realize how I first felt about him at the Chinese restaurant was right. I should’ve kept my distance from him. I should’ve listened to Maxx’s warnings and Jackson Sinclair’s, too.
Maybe the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree.
“Just…don’t be like that,” I whisper. “Let’s not…”
“You’d have it made. In school. In this town. If I were to take you to the dance…” His words are more a threat than a promise, and I feel a rush of terror rising in my throat. I swallow it back down, and it tastes like bile.
“And that will only happen if I sleep with you?” I snort with disgust.
“I picked you over Winnie. And now you’re going to what? Slap me in the face? You’re going to tell me no?” Angrily he leers at me, the alarms in my head are blaring louder. I don’t feel safe. I’m not safe.
“You’re no prize, Ryan Alistair.” I fumble my hand behind me to find the door handle. I pop the door open and scoot back, barely catching my footing on the ground. I catch myself before falling and grip the door frame tight with my fingers.
“No one tells me no. Do you have any idea what my family can do to yours? To you?”
“Maybe you’re so rich you’re not used to it. But here I am. Here I am telling you no. You don’t get to treat me this way, you steaming pile of shit!” I slam the door shut and turn around. Off in the distance, the glowing lights of the refreshment stand attracts my attention. That’s where I’ll go. There’s where I’ll find somewhere safe.
Ryan calls out as I rush away. “Jess! Come back. Look, I’m sorry, all right!”
I don’t believe him. I pull my cell phone from my purse and text my mom. “I need a ride. 911.”
The reply comes almost right away. “I’m coming. Can you get somewhere safe?”
The refreshment stand is less than twenty feet away. I tell my mom where I’ll be, and I tell her to hurry. Behind me, Ryan calls out, and I can hear his footsteps crunching on the gravel of the parking lot as he rushes toward me.
I grab at the door handle and yank it open as Ryan locks his hand around my arm. I yelp as I’m yanked back, and my phone goes flying. “I just want to talk to you. Jessica, you’re not even giving me a chance. I’m sorry if I came on too strong.”
It seems he doesn’t want me to walk away without getting his side of the story, but I don’t want anything to do with him. I hug my purse to my chest. “Leave me alone. I’ll see you at school, all right? My mom’s on her way.”
Ryan steps closer, but the door to the refreshment stand opens, and Cameron walks out. “Everything okay out here?”
I stare at Ryan, and he stares back with smoldering intensity. I can feel the rage coming off of him, and I’m glad I’m not alone. “We’re just having a little conversation. Why don’t you step back inside?”
I swallow hard, and Cameron glances between us. He gets between Ryan and me. “I think she asked you to leave her alone. So why don’t you step back, Alistair.”
Ryan snickers. “Who put you in charge?”
“I think you did when you wouldn’t listen. So back off before one of us calls the cops.”
Shock plasters across Ryan’s face. “The police? I think you’re misunderstanding what’s going on here. It was just a misunderstanding. Right, Jess?” He gives me that smile I thought was adorable just a half-hour ago. Now it scares me.
“I think it’s best if we call it a night.”
Ryan’s eyes narrow, and his mood suddenly shifts. His shoulders round, and he angrily points at us. “I could ruin the both of you. You think you’re tough now. Just you wait!” He storms off, and I’m relieved he’s gone.
“Come inside,” Cameron says. “Popcorn here is pretty good.”
“Sure. Thanks. I don’t know how to properly say it.”
“Right place and right time.” Cameron smiles and holds the door open for me. We step inside to the cozy old place that hasn’t been renovated since my parents were born, at least.
“You don’t need to wait with me.” I glance around at the menu. I sure am feeling hungry right about now. The woman working the counter eyes me suspiciously. Did everyone know of Amber Chetwood?
Here in Bay Harbor, the answer is a big fat you betcha.
“It’s no problem. I’ll make sure your mom gets you home safe.” Cameron’s eyes are bright and compassionate. I almost can’t believe he’s for real. I must seem like such a fool to fall for a guy like Ryan and all his smooth moves.
“I feel like an idiot.”
“Don’t,” Cameron says softly. I feel safer just having him around. “You had a close call. I’m going to make sure you’re all right.”
I shrug. “Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I thought.” Did I overreact?
The woman from the counter finally speaks. “I’ve seen that look before. It’s no act, and I know his type. Not much different than his father was at his age.”
Cameron gives me the side-eye. I think of what Jackson Sinclair said at the fundraiser. He accused Martin of rape. If it was true…. My interest piques. I rub my arms to dismiss the goosebumps rising up on my flesh. “What did his father do?”
She f
rowns and glances to the side like she’s said too much. “It was a long time ago, and I’m afraid I don’t really remember.” She hurries behind the counter and picks up a dishcloth, wiping her work area down.
I scowl and wonder what it is she knows. “Does this have anything to do with Amber Chetwood?”
She laughs. “Not everything has to do with her. Of course, I can see why you’d think so, being you look so much like her. Martin Alistair was obsessed with her. It’s no wonder his son…” her eyes widen as she realizes she’s revealed too much information and goes back to her busy work behind the counter.
I close in. “Please, if you know something about what happened between Amber and Martin… If there was something ugly going on between them—”
Her lips pucker as she gazes between us, weighing her options. “There was talk. Big talk that Martin had been stalking Amber. That she had bruises. He took his obsession too far. That’s what people say.”
My eyes widen, and her mouth opens just as the front door opens. “Jess!” My mom rushes in. “Are you okay? What happened?”
The older woman behind the counter turns away, and I realize I’ve lost her. Whatever it was she was going to tell me, the moment is lost. She’ll never tell me what was on her mind now, which means if I’m going to find out anything, it might need to be between Ryan and me. I shudder at the thought of being alone with him again.
Mom crushes me in a hug. “Jess, why aren’t you saying anything?”
“I’m okay. I just realized Ryan and I aren’t compatible. Guy’s a pig.” I snort to drive my point home but downplay what happened. I want Mom to let me out of the house again. Cameron clears his throat.
“Oh, Mom, this is Cameron. A friend from school. He was waiting with me.”
She nods. “It’s nice to meet you. Thanks for waiting, but I have this now—unless you need a ride?
He shakes his head. “I’m good, but Jess, if I can call you…”
I nod. “I’d like that. Thanks again for everything.”
Mom puts her arm around my shoulders and steers me toward the door. I glance back at Cameron, grateful to know him. Grateful that he was around when I needed him. Mom, though, isn’t ready to let it go. “If you’re sure that’s all it is. Your message sounded so urgent.”
“Sorry. I wanted to make sure you’d come to get me. You know what texts are like, it’s hard to know how people really mean them.”
Mom leads me outside. Her car is waiting with the headlights still glowing, and the motor gently rumbling. Mom really hadn’t taken any chances. “You can tell me all about it,” Mom gets in the driver’s side as I get in the passenger side, “over some ice cream. What do you say?”
“Long as we do it at home, sure. Oh, wait a second…” I realize I had dropped my phone in the parking lot, and I had never picked it up. I run out of the car and peer at the ground. I’m sure it should be here somewhere, but I can’t find it.
“What’s wrong?” Mom rushes to my side, and I go down on my hands and knees, looking for a trace of it among the gravel.
But it’s not there. And I begin to suspect who has it.
Looks like I’m going to have to talk to Ryan after all.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Gregory Academy, Bay Harbor
Jessica: September 11th, 2020
“I’m surprised your mom let you out of the house,” Maxx says as we step into the main corridor of campus, each of us with a bookbag over our shoulder.
“She probably wouldn’t if I told her the truth.” The truth is my arm still hurts from where Ryan grabbed me, and I woke up with a nasty bruise. He was rough, quick to anger when things didn’t go his way, and I wonder if it’s genetic. Had his father gotten angry when Amber ignored his advances? Had they had an altercation the night of the homecoming dance?
Maybe I had been barking up the wrong rich family tree, but something about Jackson and his family made it seem like there was more to them than riches and country clubs. They had a buried secret, but maybe their secret wasn’t about Amber. I had to follow the trail, and last night, Ryan showed me where it is.
Even if he doesn’t realize it.
Maxx and I climb the stairs up to the second floor. “Ryan’s never shown a hint of a temper before. Of course, he’s used to getting what he wants. Maybe you should—I can’t believe I’m saying this—talk to Winnie.”
“The thought had occurred to me. I’ll catch up with you later. Let’s grab lunch together.”
Maxx nods and continues down the hall while I turn into language arts. The classroom begins to fill with students, and I stow my backpack beneath my seat in the second row. When I stand up again, Ryan’s there leering at me.
I try not to jump or react to seeing him. He smiles in a mischievous way and extends his hand. My phone sits in it like a miniature surfboard awaiting its big wave. “You dropped this last night. I thought I’d save it for you. You wouldn’t want anyone to read your private messages.”
Scowling, I yank it away. “You read my messages?”
“Some, yes,” Ryan raises his eyebrows. “Guess I shouldn’t have suspected anything more from a broke townie like you. But an arrest record? That I wouldn’t have suspected.”
For a split second, my vision darkens. “Those messages are private.”
“Right,” he shifts closer to me. “But you’ve got a record, and you think what? You’re going to waltz into town and solve the oldest cold case we have? All because you’re lucky enough to be as beautiful as Amber Chetwood?” Ryan laughs and shakes his head. “Think it’ll absolve you of your own crimes?”
“I paid the price, all right? Please don’t tell anyone.”
He licks his lip. “What’d you tell your mom about last night?”
“Nothing,” I rush on, and I want to kick myself for it. “I told her we just didn’t hit it off.”
“Smart. Guess your secrets can stay with me, but if you think of talking to anyone about what happened last night, you’re the one who will end up embarrassed, not me.” Ryan wipes his chin and gazes off at the door. The bell rings before he turns his attention back to me. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry about last night. I didn’t want things to go that way. It just got out of control.” He raises his eyebrows, and then he’s gone.
I can’t make heads or tails on whether I think he’s a good guy or a bad guy. I do know I’m staying as far from him as I can. How often do things get out of control for him? If this is a common occurrence, other girls might have experienced what I did.
“Take your seat, Ms. Chase.” The teacher’s voice startles me, but it spurs me into action. I take my seat and drop my phone into my backpack. When I look up again, I’m surprised to see Winfred staring at me from across the aisle.
Her eyes widen, and she bounces the tip of her pencil against the desk. I feel like she has something to say. She glances away as I open my mouth to say something. I wonder what she could possibly have to say.
And does it have anything to do with Ryan Alistair?
After class, Winfred rushes after me in the hall. “Jessica! Hello? Hey, I’m talking to you.”
“My next class is on the other side of the courtyard, and I’d really like not to be late again.”
“Fine!” Winfred sounds flustered, and when I glance back, I see her rapidly blinking her eyes. “I just… Don’t forget about our project. After school, you can come to my house.”
Going back to the Sinclairs house is the last thing I want to do, but it might give me a chance to finally talk to Carolyn, who is desperate to avoid me. At least that’s how it feels. “Great. After this, you can come to mine. Unless you don’t want to slum it in a regular-sized house.”
Winfred gasps. “I don’t consider you slumming. Or at least, slumming is a bit harsh. We could call it…a budget lifestyle.”
I snort and push through the double-wide doors that lead into the courtyard. Winfred chases after me. “You’re in such a bad mood; it’s almost like you�
��re me.”
We stand in the middle of the stone courtyard, and I stop dead in my tracks. “You were watching Ryan and me. I’m sure you know why I’m in such a bad mood.”
Winfred glances around before her eyes settle back on me, and there’s a sadness—a darkness, that hadn’t been there before. “Depends on what he did.”
“I think you know.” I shift my books to my other arm.
She nods. “We should talk, but not here. The walls have ears, even when there aren’t any walls.”
I raise my eyebrows and cross my arms. “Here I thought we were going to be mortal enemies.”
“Me, too. I thought…Well, after we worked on our project over the weekend, I realized you weren’t what I thought. I’m not saying I think we should start braiding each other’s hair or anything.”
I’d say. “See you.”
“Right.” Winfred tosses back her hair and does an about-face. I think it’s more for show and I wonder what it is she has to tell me. I wonder how my life is about to change. She heads toward her class, and I head toward mine.
I push open the door and step into the east wing, rushing toward my class. I have to duck teachers standing in the corridor. “Afternoon, Jess,” Ms. Marvel smiles.
“Hi!” I’m breathless, but suddenly, I stop dead in my tracks and turn to face her. She’s already talking to another student. She smiles, tucking her hair behind her ears, and suddenly it dawns on me.
Where I’ve seen Jenny, Amber’s friend from the picture, before.
And I’m staring right at her.
Jenny grew up to be Ms. Marvel, a science teacher at Gregory Prep. I’ve had access to one of Amber’s best friends, and I never even knew it. Not until this very moment.
Now that I know, what the heck do I do about it?
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I meet Cameron for lunch on the other side of campus in the art center. It’s empty minus tables and aisles and smells like oil paint and glue. We climb up the ladder to the loft area that overlooks the ground floor. There’s a black railing and an array of lights shining down below. In the center of the upper platform is a blanket and a few brown paper bags.