As soon as my father stepped into the home team dressing room, Ryan grabbed my hand threading his fingers through mine. “Here,” he said as he tugged me into the supply room.
The door closed behind us, but the room remained lit with a soft glow of light seeping in around the various doors. Thankfully, the room didn’t contain any chemical smells as I barely had time to fill my lungs before Ryan’s lips crashed onto mine.
My body relaxed into his as his arms went around and lifted me to lessen our height difference. My arms grabbed onto his undershirt clad shoulders. The clasp of his suspenders holding his hockey pants on bit into my palms as he walked with me dangling from him. My back hit the one patch of empty wall beside the door, allowing me to wrap my legs around his waist.
He never broke our kiss the entire time and neither did I, despite the sweat and smell coming from his body. I didn’t care that he hadn’t showered. I would live with the smell. And when my father questioned it, I’d tell him it came from a hug. A brotherly hug.
His lips pulled back, and I greedily sought air to fill my aching lungs. But Ryan appeared not to have any need as his lips traveled along the skin on my cheek and down my neck. His tongue traced a line along the hollow behind my ear, raising goosebumps under my three layers of clothes.
“I’ve missed you so much, Kitkat,” he said as he finally broke for air.
“I’ve missed you, too. I have the letters for you and Kris. Have you seen him at all?” While I loved these stolen moments with Ryan, I was desperate for news about Kris.
He continued to hold me tight as he explained how he’d seen Kris a number of times since the season began. Whenever Kris’s schedule allowed, he returned to Kingston to visit with Ryan, but Ryan continued to miss him.
“He called tonight though to remind me to give you a kiss from him and to make sure I had the letters. He also told me that he’d just received a call from Ottawa. A center was injured during the game last night and they’re bringing him up to play until they know how severe the injury is.”
I smiled at the news even though I felt sorry for the injured player. With Kris playing for the Ottawa team, I would at least be able to watch him play on TV.
Ryan’s lips found mine again as we made most of the few minutes we had left. A beep on his watch broke the two of us apart. “I set the alarm for twelve minutes when your father said fifteen,” he explained as he lowered him back to the ground.
I bit my kiss swollen bottom lip to keep from crying. Why did fifteen minutes have to be so short? It always seemed so long whenever my stepmother did her fifteen minute talks on various lady topics.
Ryan picked up a bag from the floor by his feet. I wondered where the bag had come from as I hadn’t even realized he’d brought one out of the locker room with him. But then who could blame me when I’d been feasting my eyes on his body and the way he looked with his sweat drenched hair and still half dressed in his hockey uniform. The only way that could have looked better was if he’d lost the undershirt as well.
He handed the bag to me as he dropped a kiss on my forehead. “This contains all the notes, letters, and a few presents from myself and Kris.”
“Oh, Ryan. You didn’t have to do that.” One tear broke the rules and began its descent over my cheek. Before I could lift my hand, Ryan’s calloused thumb wiped it away as another tear decided to take the same route.
“Don’t cry, Kitkat. We’ll get through this.”
I changed to sucking on my lower lip after a stab of pain when I bit too hard. Pulling out the packages of folded up letters wrapped into two labeled piles tied with ribbon, I handed them to Ryan. No words escaped my lips, but I thought he understood my feelings.
“I hate that we have to leave. I don’t want to go and leave you, but I don’t want you in trouble with your father either.”
“I don’t want you to go either, Ryan.”
He entwined our fingers as he led me out of the supply room not a moment too soon. The door had barely swung shut when my father emerged from the home team locker room.
“Time to say your goodbyes, Kayla.” He dropped his eyes and stared at the spot where my hand joined with Ryan’s.
Acting as if he didn’t have a care in the world—I knew different from the lack of sparkle in his eyes—Ryan pulled me into a hug. He dropped another kiss, but this time it landed on the top of my head. “Take care, Kitkat. And make sure you listen to your parents.”
I groaned at his acting ability. It was a good thing he played hockey so well as his acting sucked. Taking one last breath to remember his scent, even the disgusting post hockey sweat smell, I stepped away from him. I rolled my eyes as I replied, “I will, Ryan. And you should listen to yours as well.”
He laughed, but I could hear the warble in it. With a wave and without a backward glance he walked over to my father and clasped his hand in farewell before he stepped back into his dressing room.
“Come on, Kayla. We need to get home.”
With a heavy heart, I followed behind him. He never offered his elbow, and I secretly rejoiced. I didn’t think I could have walked next to him without my face revealing the grief I felt. Ryan’s team wouldn’t be back for another two months. Somehow, I would have to find a way to survive, but maybe their written words and gifts, hidden in my hoodie and jacket pockets, would help make the time pass a little easier.
Chapter Nine
Summer Age 17
I tapped my foot against the grass on the infield of the track. One eye on the various stopwatches in my hand and another on the two males barrelling down the track toward me. My bottom lip between my teeth to keep me from squealing in glee. After not having seen Kris since the previous summer, and Ryan in four months, having them back in my life for the past week was still a dream.
The two weeks I’d spent waiting at Aunt Susan’s for them to arrive had driven me crazy with longing and anxiety. Had they changed their minds about me? About us? Ryan had acted like nothing had changed, but Kris had spent most of the year playing professional hockey. He was interviewed on TV numerous times and already had a large fan base, many of whom were women, while I was still in high school for another year.
But without Kris’s star status, I would have been blindsided by the news of his parents’ death in a car accident. I’d spent the past few months worried about him and Desiree. And the two weeks I’d waited at Aunt Susan’s had only increased my concern. Seeing him training like this, brought a small measure of comfort. It meant he was still living and not wallowing in grief. Besides the haunted look on his face when he thought no one was watching, his only outward sign of his grief was his extremely short hair. He’d cut off his longer hair in keeping with his Mi’kmaq culture as a sign of respect.
As they each passed me, I made note of their times on the clipboard I held in my other hand. It was a lot to juggle, but I didn’t want to bend over. My muscles ached from the workout I’d participated in with the boys the day before. It was the same reason I didn’t sit on the small blanket Kris laid out for me. I worried that if I sat, I wouldn’t be able to stand again without help. And asking for help was the last thing I wanted to do. There was no way I would reveal how sore I was to them.
Ryan crossed the finish line with a smile and wink as I hastily wrote his timings on the sheet. He finished first, but not necessarily with the fastest time as he and Kris staggered their start times to ensure I could keep a proper record. But I also ducked my head to keep him from seeing the slight blush on my cheeks from his wink. After seven days, I still wasn’t used to their overt flirting.
“Kayla, time?” Kris wiped the sweat from his brow with the towel Ryan tossed him as he took deep gulping breaths. He used the towel to rub his newer brush cut and my heart clenched.
Biting my lip, my eyes dropped to the sheet in front of me where I had just finished transferring his time from the stopwatch. “Eight minutes, thirty seconds. A slight improvement from yesterday.”
“But still not as fast as mine.” Ryan pun
ched Kris in the arm before wrapping his arm around my shoulders.
I pulled my long sable colored braid from under Ryan’s arm and dropped it over my shoulder as Kris’s eyes watched. The bottom fell out of my stomach as his eyes dimmed at the sight. I hated that my hair brought him pain. I even offered to cut it to honor his parents, but he refused, telling me that seeing my hair, running his fingers through it brought him pleasure.
Blowing him a kiss, I gritted my teeth and ducked under Ryan’s arm to pick up Kris’s water bottle from Ryan’s bag at my feet. “Here you go.” I held it out to him.
Grabbing the bottle around my hand, he yanked, pulling me into his sweaty shirt. Before I could wince in pain at the sudden movement, his lips ghosted over mine and then angled up to place a kiss on the tip of my nose. Tease! “Thanks, KK.” He slid his hand up the water bottle, freeing mine. With a wink, he tilted his head back and drained half the bottle of water in large powerful gulps.
My eyes followed the rippling of his neck muscles with each swallow. All I wanted to do was to trace the route with my tongue, but it wasn’t the place or time—not that I was even ready for something like that. Instead, I tried to make myself content by sucking on my lower lip. The sun glinted off what I could see of his sweat soaked chest and arms, highlighting the change in his physique from the summer before.
Hockey was a physically demanding sport and kept him in great shape, but between his age and the professional trainers in Ottawa, I thought his body was a piece of art, like the new tribal inspired cross tattoo he sported on his left shoulder.
“Earth to Kitkat.” I could hear the suppressed laughter in Ryan’s voice as he nudged my arm and then waved a hand in front of my face.
My cheeks grew warm as Kris’s eyes darkened, ensnaring mine in the process. His lips raised into a slow sensual grin. And I wanted to drag my tongue over each ridge of muscle and trace each line of his tattoo. My breathing stopped… where had that thought come from?
Another nudge on my shoulder from Ryan broke the trance I was under. With a small gasp, I stepped back, trying to put more space between Kris and me as Ryan chuckled. But the air still crackled between us.
A bottle of cold water was thrust into my hand. “Here you go, Kitkat. I think you need this to cool off.” Ryan chuckled as he moved to stand before me, blocking my view of Kris.
The thumping of my heart slowed and melted from his caring gesture. But then I found myself looking at his backside where the muscles lining his arms and upper back were on display from the way his shirt clung to his sweaty body. I couldn't move my eyes away. Instead, they traced each revealed muscle down until my gaze landed on his tight butt. The fire Kris had ignited in my veins returned with a gust, like a backdraft, springing out to burn the unsuspecting.
Lifting the cold, unopened bottle of water, I held it against my forehead and then the side and back of my neck in the vain hope it would cool my raging seventeen-year-old hormones.
“Weight lifting.” Kris stepped around Ryan and picked up their heavy gym bag with ease and slung it over his shoulders. I’d obviously missed something while drooling over their hotness. “Come on.” He grasped my fingers, entwining them as he pulled me toward the gym doors on the other side of the track.
“Don't worry, Kitkat. We won’t try to kill you today.” Ryan wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pushed me to match Kris’s pace. It would have been easier to keep up if I wasn't short, especially in relation to all their six foot plus glory. I believed that on top of their changes in muscle definition, both had added to the heights during our estrangement.
A small groan escaped before I could stop it.
“Sore, KK?”
“A little.”
Ryan’s fingers dug into the muscle knot on the front of my shoulder near the collarbone. I moaned as the knot released. “I’ll use my magic fingers on your muscles tonight, Kitkat. It will have you feeling like new in the morning.”
When Kris nodded in agreement, I gave my smile full rein. How could I not, when one of my hot boyfriends offered to rub his hands on me. Maybe this weight lifting thing wasn't going to be so bad after all?
I patted my full belly with a sigh as I leaned back into my patio chair and Kris’s arm, which he had slung across the back earlier. “Julianna, you make the best sides to compliment David’s famous grilling skills.”
Ryan nodded in agreement as he speared the final piece of steak on his plate. Shoving it into his mouth, he moaned. “I’ve missed this so much. My host family cooked well, but nothing like this.” He leaned back, matching my pose as his hand landed on my thigh under the table.
Kris shifted in his seat, stretching his long legs out under mine, so he wouldn’t be kicking Michael or Ryan’s parents who sat across from us. “That’ll be a huge change for you, Rye, having to cook for yourself next year in Florida.”
My leg muscles twitched as Kris brought up the proverbial elephant in the room. While I was extremely happy for Ryan’s good fortune at being drafted, it was the move to Florida that stung. How was our relationship to survive? With another year of high school for me, Kris playing in Ottawa, and now Ryan in Florida, we would never see each other. Well, really it was me who would never see either of them for a year after this summer.
Kris must have noticed my reaction because his thumb caressed small circles on the back of my shoulder as he continued to speak. “It’s been the best living in Ottawa because Julianna brings me care packages of her home cooking.”
Ryan’s satisfied smile dimmed. “Shit. I didn’t think of that.” He gaze strayed over to his mother as he rearranged his face into his patented puppy dog look.
I turned to Kris and rolled my eyes as he chuckled.
“Mom,” Ryan begged, “move to Florida with me.” He batted his eyelashes, but Julianna just laughed as David tossed a balled up napkin at his son. “Since you won’t do that, will you fill up my freezer then with premade meals?”
Picking up her husband’s empty plate and stacking it on hers, Julianna scoffed. “Like you’ll really want my food in Florida.”
“Florida…” Ryan’s eyes took on a faraway look as I chewed my lower lip.
“Yeah, sucks to be you, having to play hockey in the heat and with the beaches close by.” Kris’s voice tried to sound happy, but I heard the envy and sadness it contained. This would be the farthest and longest time apart for the two of them in years. Between the death of his parents and now the loss of Ryan, Kris was going to have the toughest time adjusting.
I wanted to wrap my arms around him to offer comfort, but I couldn’t even find the comfort in myself. Even with all I’d gone through, I knew I was out of my depth with this.
Unable to sit still, I reached for Ryan’s empty plate and stacked it on mine before grabbing Kris’s. With Kris’s arm on my chair it was difficult to push it back, but I managed to before standing and dislodging Ryan’s hand from my thigh with ease. A shiver of unease poked into my heart.
Lifting the dirty dishes, I nudged Ryan’s thigh with my knee. “Excuse me.”
He blinked as his brain returned to the moment. “What? No, wait, Kitkat. You don’t need to take those. I’ll get them.” He pushed his chair back enough for me to slip through as he attempted to stand.
“It’s all good, Ryan. I’ll bring out the desserts for you and Kris.” I didn’t wait to see if he or Kris would put up a fight as I rushed across the patio and into the kitchen behind Julianna.
“Thanks sweetie. But you didn’t have to. One of those lazy butt boys could have done it. They should be waiting on you.” Julianna lifted the dirty dishes from my arms. “I’m guessing they all want dessert?”
“Yes.” I bit my swollen lip and turned my head. “I’ll grab them after a trip to the bathroom. She nodded, but I didn’t wait for anything else as I made a hasty retreat. My eyes prickled and burned as the unshed tears battered my walls.
What is wrong with me? I sank to the floor with my back against the bathroom door. I s
hould have been happy, flying from all the hormones, but instead a sense of foreboding and fear gripped my insides.
Taking a couple of deep breaths, I stood and left the bathroom.—the tears pushed back into the trunk and locked up tight.
In the kitchen I picked up the three plates filled with my favorite dessert: Julianna’s famed strawberry-rhubarb crisp with vanilla ice cream. Stepping onto the patio, I noticed only the boys still sat at the table. Michael, David, and Julianna were gone.
Kris jumped from his chair and with a few strides stood in front of me. “Let me help with that, KK.” His hand surrounded mine with a warmth that traveled through me, heating, and burning away that sense of unease.
Staring into his eyes, the burn intensified. Despite the sadness that lingered on the edges, there was something else. Desire? Lust? Love? I wasn’t sure, but it called to me, making me want to lean into to him, to climb inside, getting as close as I could.
My mouth hung open the tiniest amount as I struggled to get air into my lungs. Dryness coated my lips, so I did the only thing I could think of… I licked them with the tip of my tongue.
Kris’s nostrils flared as his dark eyes became bottomless pools, sucking me into their depth. Drowning me.
My heart galloped and I wondered briefly if he could tell.
“I’m hungry.” Ryan’s voice broke my stupor although I continued to feel dizzy from the encounter.
The corners of Kris’s mouth lifted as his thumb delicately traced my hand. He lifted his dessert plate. “My favorite.”
He spun on his heel, taking his dessert to the table, and leaving me standing there. I had this funny suspicion that he wasn’t just talking about the dessert.
Taking a calming breath, I plastered on a shaky smile to go with my shaky knees and followed him.
“You look a little flushed there, Kitkat.” Ryan wiggled his eyebrows as he snagged the plates from my hands.
Collapsing onto my seat, I did my best to hide the redness from my cheeks as Ryan chuckled and placed a kiss on my temple. Needing a distraction, I forked a mouthful of dessert into my mouth and moaned as the flavor exploded over my tongue.
Hers From The Start: A Collection of First In Series Reverse Harem Page 80