Daughter on His Doorstep

by Teresa Southwick

  Those pleading eyes were the biggest challenge he’d ever faced but he had this. “Let me think about it.”

  “But Dad—” Just like that Emma’s pleading look turned fiercely defiant. “I want her to.”

  Wait, that wasn’t supposed to happen. Let’s try this again. “I said I need to think about it.”

  “But she hasn’t slept over in a long time. And we can have hot dogs and popcorn.”

  “I did buy all that stuff—”

  “So, I’ll call her and see if she can come over.” The little girl moved toward the phone on the counter.

  “Wait, Emma, I didn’t say yes.”

  “You didn’t say no,” she pointed out.

  But he wanted to. Why couldn’t he? Stupid question. He wanted her to like him. But this didn’t feel right. “I was looking forward to having dinner just the two of us.”

  “Then it would be three of us. You’ll like her,” she promised.

  “Her parents don’t know me. And maybe they wouldn’t want her to go to a stranger’s house. Especially on such short notice.” He was dancing around a negative and hoping she would just let this go.

  “They won’t care.” She called his bluff. “Please, Dad.”

  He really didn’t like this idea. “How about if we plan it another time?”

  “But I want her to come over tonight.”

  He knew when he was boxed in. As much as he didn’t want to, he had to say it. “No, Emma, not this time.”

  “You’re mean and I’m not staying here with you.” Angry tears welled in her eyes before she stomped out of the kitchen toward the front door. “I hate you and I wish you weren’t my dad.”

  And then she was gone. One minute he’d been on top of the world, the next he was flattened by a freckle-faced nine-year-old. He felt as if he had the wind knocked out of him and his head was spinning.

  When he pulled it together, he realized he needed to call Shelby and took out his cell phone. He hit speed dial and got her voicemail. This wasn’t good and he had to explain what happened. Pacing the room he weighed his options and figured going over and speaking face-to-face was the best. But before he could do that there was a knock. He opened the door and Shelby was there with Emma.

  “Hi. She told me you were mean and she doesn’t want to stay here.”

  “Let me explain—”

  She held up a hand to stop him. “I know what happened. And she has something to say to you. Emma?”

  The little girl wouldn’t look at him. “I’m sorry I said I hate you.”

  “And?” Shelby prompted.

  “I shouldn’t have asked for a sleepover without giving you more warning.”

  “Good.” Her mother gave the small shoulders a reassuring squeeze. “Now go wash your face and hands for dinner.”

  “Okay.” She gave him a hostile look then moved past him and went upstairs.

  He heard the bathroom door close, then met Shelby’s gaze. “You’re letting her stay here tonight?”

  “Of course. That’s what we agreed to do and she was the one who suggested it.” She smiled sympathetically. “The honeymoon is over. For what it’s worth, you did the right thing.”

  “She called me dad for the first time today.”

  “Oh, Luke—” Shelby put her hand on his arm. “I’m so glad.”

  “I thought I was home free. First the valentine party at school when she introduced me as her dad. Then she just said it as if calling me dad was the most natural thing in the world. Then—boom.”

  “Don’t you see? She was testing you. By telling her no you actually earned your dad stripes.”

  “But she hates me.”

  “No, she doesn’t.” Her expression was surprisingly tender. “She’s just mad. For what it’s worth she’s tired, too. That will pass because she didn’t really mean it.”

  “I’ll have to take your word on that.” He didn’t mean to sound bitter but it came out that way.

  “It’s up to us to teach her right from wrong. You’re a cop. Your job is all about people who didn’t learn that lesson. We have to give her parameters. That’s our job. Welcome to the wonderful world of parenthood.”

  “Thanks, I think.” He put his hand over hers, where she’d left it on his arm. “Thanks for bringing her back. And the pep talk.”

  “You’re welcome.” She smiled. “And just pretend nothing happened. She’ll shake it off.”

  “Okay.”

  Shelby said good-night and left. For the second time Luke’s head was spinning. This night hadn’t gone perfectly, far from it. But things could have been worse if Emma’s mother had handled it differently. He was a cop and wanted things to be black-and-white, right or wrong. Nothing about this fit into either category. It was all gray area, including an attraction to Shelby that just wouldn’t leave him alone.

  * * *

  Later that night Shelby texted Luke to see if it was too late to talk and within seconds her cell vibrated and his caller ID popped up on her phone. She answered right away.

  “Hi,” she said. “How’s it going over there? Is the cold war still—cold?”

  He laughed. “She got over it. Just like you said she would. She’s sound asleep.”

  His deep voice sent shivers down her spine and her chest suddenly felt tight. Just an involuntary reaction that she would control if she could. But somehow she managed to blow it every time.

  “I’m so glad everything settled down,” she finally said.

  “Are you calling to initiate a welfare check on a dad in training or is there another reason?”

  “I forgot something.” When there was silence on the other end of the line, she went on. “I told you about her friend’s birthday party tomorrow.”

  “Yeah. I have the address where to drop her off.”

  “I didn’t put the gift in her backpack with her clothes.”

  “She can run over in the morning to get it,” he said.

  “I won’t be home. I’m tutoring a student who is currently failing my class. And Mom will be gone, too. I thought it best to make sure this is handled tonight.”

  “Sure.”

  “Would it be okay if I bring it over now?”

  “That’s fine.” Did he sound annoyed? It was hard to tell.

  “Are you sure? I know it’s a little late. I can just leave it on the porch—”

  “Shelby, it’s really all right. I’m a night owl. Staying up late is SOP for me.”

  “It’s what now?”

  “Standard operating procedure. I’ll be up for a while. Come on over. I’ll pour you a glass of wine.”

  “Oh, I don’t know about—” She suddenly realized he hung up and she was talking to dead air.

  Shelby didn’t know what to make of this “I’ll pour you a glass of wine” Luke versus the angry and resentful man who swore he would never forgive her. Part of her wanted to ding dong ditch him—put the birthday gift on his porch, ring the bell and run. The other part wanted to spend time with a handsome man who fascinated her and also happened to be the father of her child.

  Since she had to be a grown-up and face him, she’d best get herself together and see whether or not the wine-pouring, smooth-talking guy she’d just talked to was an alien imposter impersonating the real Luke.

  Shelby grabbed the brightly wrapped package then headed to his house, her heart beating faster than a hummingbird’s wings. Standing outside the door she took a big breath before knocking softly. He answered almost immediately.

  “Hi.” He smiled and it was friendly in a way he hadn’t been when Emma wasn’t present.

  Shelby held out the present. “And, just so you know, she packed her favorite outfit to wear to the party so don’t let her try and pull a fast one tomorrow because she changed her mind. Call if there are any—”

 
“Shelby, take a breath. I think I can roll with this.” He angled his head toward the interior of the house. “Do you want to come in?”

  “It’s late. I really shouldn’t—”

  “Why?” His dark eyes challenged.

  “Do I need a reason? Isn’t it enough that I’m giving you an out? A chance to think better of this.”

  “I have thought better. It would be nice to have some company.” He glanced over at her house and one corner of his mouth curved up. “Did you sneak out?”

  She laughed. “Mom is asleep, so I’m not sure that meets the definition of sneaking.”

  He stepped back to let her pass and glanced at the living room with plastic drop cloths, paint cans, rollers, pans and other supplies for the job. “There’s no place to sit in here. Let’s go in the kitchen. I’ve got bar stools for the island.”

  He set the party gift on the bottom stair then headed to the back of the house. She followed and wondered whether or not it was wrong to go fangirl admiring his butt and broad shoulders. Right, wrong, indifferent didn’t matter because the feeling wasn’t a conscious choice. It just happened and she blamed her hormones.

  As promised there was a glass of wine, a tumbler actually, already sitting on the island. He looked at it and shrugged. “I don’t have fancy glasses. Hope you like red.”

  “I do.” She sat on one of the bar stools and noticed a greeting card standing up on the island. “I see she gave you your valentine card.”

  He smiled. “Yeah. That’s a first.”

  “It took her a long time to pick it out.” She took the tumbler of wine he handed over.

  “I’ll put it in the scrapbook.”

  “I never thought of you as a scrapbook kind of guy,” Shelby said.

  “I’ve never been a father before.” Luke opened the refrigerator and grabbed a longneck bottle of beer, then twisted off the cap before sitting beside her.

  She took a sip of wine because after that she didn’t know what to say. Thoughts rolled through her mind but there was only one thing she wanted to know. With their troubled history and his hard feelings about the past it didn’t seem possible that she could make the situation worse by asking straight-out.

  So she did. “Why are you not glaring at me anymore? What’s with the glass of wine? You’re being nice and that makes me nervous.”

  “Glaring, huh?”

  “Yes. It could be your superpower. You’re very good at it.”

  “For the record I stopped glaring a while ago.” He sipped from his beer. “And the wine is just my way of saying thank-you.”

  “For what?”

  “The valentine card. Making sure she could pick one out for me today. And earlier. You could have taken advantage of Emma’s meltdown and used it against me. Encouraged her not to come back.”

  “Why would I do that?” she asked.

  He shrugged. “To keep her from me.”

  “You’re her father. And in case you haven’t noticed, she’s pretty stubborn and headstrong. She’s not going to be kept away if she doesn’t want to be,” Shelby assured him.

  “Still, you did just the opposite.”

  “Besides the fact that it was the right thing to do, we have a deal. I agreed to help you bond with Emma.” She toyed with the tumbler in front of her. “I’m holding up my end of the bargain.”

  “The truth is that the chip on my shoulder got real heavy when Emma said she hated me and stomped back over to your house. I was really feeling the victim and wallowing in being left out of her life for the last nine years. Then you brought her back, got her to grudgingly apologize and said what you said about being her parent. I realized it wasn’t just the good stuff I’d missed. There had to have been bad, too, and you handled that by yourself.”

  She thought about it and nodded. “You missed the health scare when she was just a few months old and had her first cold and fever. That was scary. But even worse was the stomach bug she caught that put her in the hospital. That’s when I found out that nineteen-month-olds dehydrate fast and you can’t take any chances when they can’t keep liquids down.”

  “I can’t even imagine how you felt.”

  She would never forget it. “You also weren’t here for the bumps, bruises, mean kids. It was all really hard.”

  “It has to be said that you’ve done a great job with her, Shel. And I saw you in action when you brought her back tonight.”

  “Thanks. And I say again that you also did pretty awesome earlier.” She held up her glass. “Let’s drink to co-parenting and having each other’s backs.”

  He touched his bottle to her glass, then drank. She was fascinated by the way the muscles in his strong neck moved when he swallowed. Their shoulders brushed and sparks flew. She prayed it was nothing more than static electricity. Things were complicated enough without it being more.

  “Speaking of having your back—” He set his beer bottle down on the island and met her gaze. “I told my mother about Emma. That she’s mine.”

  “Oh.” She thought about the ramifications of that. “So you’re warning me that she hired a hit man to take me out?”

  “How did you know?” Then he grinned. “Just kidding.”

  “Not funny.” But she probably deserved that and more. “How did she take it?”

  “Truthfully, she didn’t say much over the phone. I think she’s saving everything for the in-person tongue-lashing.” He met her gaze. “She’s driving in from Phoenix next week.”

  “I see.”

  “She wants to meet Emma,” he said.

  “Of course. I’ll make sure she’s available.”

  He reached over and put his hand on hers. “I’ll be there, Shelby. I meant what I said about having your back.”

  He’d left her once. It wasn’t fair to compare this to what happened when he joined the army, when he didn’t know she was pregnant. But the result was the same. She’d handled everything then and expected she would do the same now.

  “It’s okay, Luke. I can handle things by myself. I learned how when you said you didn’t want to see me anymore.”

  “About that, Shelby—” He turned the beer bottle with his fingers. “I’d like to set the record straight once and for all. I pulled the plug on us to protect you from me. And I was leaving. Your mom was right. I was on the edge and could have gone either way. I didn’t want you to go down with me. I cared a lot about you.”

  She was stunned. “I wish you’d told me. We could have faced it together.”

  “I’m a loner.”

  “You may have been that way once, but not now.” Shelby couldn’t read his eyes and didn’t know if they reflected regret or resistance. “If only I’d known—”

  “What?”

  “If I’d known how you felt, nothing could have prevented me from telling you I was pregnant.” She saw his eyes narrow, and added, “I’m not saying it’s your fault. But it would have made a difference.”

  “Would it?” Luke kept turning the bottle in front of him on the island.

  “I don’t know about you, but when we were together then, the drama, the feelings, the angst were so big. It was consuming. Everything else was pushed out and there was only room for you and me.”

  “Yeah, I remember. But—” He looked sideways and met her gaze. “Now we’re mature adults. Rational and reasonable.”

  “I know, right?” She smiled but wasn’t feeling it.

  She was shaken by the fact that he’d left to save her from himself. A selfless and heroic impulse. But this revelation opened the floodgates of long-suppressed emotions. Feelings she never expected to have again. She remembered wanting him more than her next breath, as if he was the power source that made her heart beat.

  He was opening up now like he never had before and the might-have-beens weighed on her heart. All those years ago if she’d bee
n honest with him and he’d explained that he cared enough to walk away, they might have had a chance. But not now.

  Shelby made a mistake and he would never forgive her. Without trust, all the chemistry bubbling between them would just blow up in her face. It was a darn good thing that she was a mature woman now and he couldn’t crush her heart twice.

  Chapter Nine

  Shelby had never been quite this nervous. Oh, there had been anxious times like anticipating childbirth or sending Emma to preschool and kindergarten. But sitting in a booth waiting for Luke to show up with his mother took top spot in the history of apprehensive moments.

  She and Luke had strategized the location for this first meeting between Emma and his mom, her other grandmother, and decided neutral territory would be best. This was a kid-friendly pizza place with games, a jumping house and the bacteria capital of the world ball pit. If things got heated and intense, there would be a distraction for Emma and Shelby would worry about the black plague when and if it happened. They’d agreed on a time when both of them would be finished with work and now here she was with their daughter.

  “Mommy, when are they gonna get here?”

  “Are you hungry?”

  “A little. But I want to go play and you said I can’t until after I meet her.”

  “Her” being the paternal grandmother. “I’m sure your dad will be here any minute.”

  “What’s she like?” Emma was sitting on the bench seat beside her.

  “I told you, peanut, she’s a very nice lady.”

  Luke hadn’t gotten along with the woman, but Shelby had spent a little time with her. Donna McCoy was always pleasant to her and teased her son about why he couldn’t be an A student like she was. Then her mom found out they were seeing each other and she’d been forbidden to have anything to do with him or his family. Pam had pretended there was an empty lot where the McCoy house stood.

  Shelby had no idea what to expect now and was prepared to get her daughter out of there at the first sign of hostility. But she couldn’t tell Emma that.