Crazy

by Scarlett Haven

  Maybe I don’t want kids, just because I don’t want to stress and worry about them. Zach looks like he’s made himself sick with worry.

  “How are you?” Zach looks at me up and down, like he’s trying to see if I have any new injuries.

  “I’m good.” I offer him a smile, trying to show him that I am fine. But I’m sure Zach can see through it. The truth is, even though I am not physically injured, I am exhausted—physically and mentally. I feel like I’ve been put through the wringer. I just want this to all be over, and I want to sleep for a week.

  “You look like you’ve lost weight.” He frowns as he says it.

  Have I?

  Come to think of it, the clothes that usually fit me well are a little looser. I don’t know why I’ve lost weight. I’ve been eating the same, and exercising the same. If anything, I’m eating less healthy, just because we’re getting food on the go a lot. Fast food can’t be all that great for me.

  Maybe it’s the stress. I’ve been so worried, not just for me, but for the guys and for Zach. That’s the only explanation that I can think of.

  “I’m okay,” I tell him.

  That’s when I notice the guys are looking at me, too. Maybe it wasn’t as noticeable, because they’ve been around me more than Zach.

  I shrug, trying to let them know it’s not a big deal. “It’s probably because I got so seasick on that boat.”

  Zach’s face pales. “I didn’t think about that when I ordered that boat for you guys to take to Hawaii.”

  “You didn’t know I got seasick.”

  “But I do get seasick. It makes sense that you do, too.” He frowns. “I’m sorry, Zara.”

  “I’m fine.” I roll my eyes, a little annoyed with the way I’m being treated. I’m not the only one who has lost weight. Maybe it’s more noticeable on me because I was small to begin with. “Seriously. I don’t want anybody to worry about me. With the way we’ve been eating fast food, I’m sure I’ll gain weight quickly.”

  Zach sighs. “I think Zara should come with me for a while. Maybe separating from the rest of you would make it easier.”

  My heart sinks. “No, Dad. Please don’t do that. The guys have protected me this far. They’ve kept me safe. I don’t want to be apart from them.”

  “I agree with your father.” Grant steps up beside Zach. “I think being with your dad just makes sense. Who can protect you better than he can?”

  “Then come with us,” I suggest. “Just don’t separate me from them. I’d worry too much. I don’t like be apart from my team. We belong together.”

  The guys all nod their heads in agreement.

  Cam crosses his arms over his chest. “I don’t want to be apart from Zara anymore.”

  Zach throws his hands up. It’s clear he’s lost this argument. “Okay, but not all of you. You can’t travel as a group anymore. We will have to do like we did this time. We travel in groups of two and meet up at a specified location.”

  I nod. “Okay. I can do that.”

  I know he’s right. Traveling with six or seven of us in a group draws too much attention to us. So, we can separate for a day of traveling. Even if I don’t like it, I know it’s for the best.

  “We’ll figure this out,” Zach promises. “One day at a time.”

  And that’s all I can do... take it one day at a time.

  Then do it.

  We’re stay in Milan, at least for the night. I don’t know when we’re leaving, but I do know that I dread when it’s time to go. I don’t want to separate from everybody again.

  Things are so complicated, and scary. Very scary.

  The guys and I go back to our room for the night. I’m so exhausted, I end up falling asleep before we even eat dinner. This whole time zone change is kicking my butt.

  Sometime in the middle of the night, I wake up to alarms blaring in the hotel. I try not to freak out—this isn’t the first time I’ve woken up to alarms going off in a hotel before. One time, I was with my family on vacation in Florida and alarms started going off in our hotel. Apparently, some guy was drunk and pulled the alarm. I’m hoping this alarm is also just some drunk person who’s pulled the alarm, but my gut tells me it’s something more.

  When I wake up fully, I realize I’m in bed with just Dylan, and the other guys are nowhere to be seen.

  “Where’s the guys?” I ask Dylan.

  “Zach had something for them to do,” he answers. “Are you okay?”

  I nod. “I’m fine.”

  “We should probably get out of the hotel.” Dylan gets up from the bed, holding a hand out to help me. up. “Come on. Stay with me.”

  It’s when we get out of bed that I smell the smoke.

  It’s not just an alarm. There is a fire. My heart races as I realize that we’re on the twentieth floor, and we have to somehow make our way out of a burning building. Dylan must come to the realization at the same time as me, because he looks at me with his eyes wide. His entire face falls and he looks scared. More scared than I’ve ever seen him in my life.

  He grabs onto my hand. “Zara, you have to stay with me. Do not let go of my hand no matter what.”

  “I promise.”

  “We’re getting out of this hotel.” I think he says it more for himself than for me.

  “What about the guys?” I ask.

  He pulls me closer to him and kisses my forehead. “The guys can take care of themselves. Right now, you are my only worry.”

  He’s right. I know he is. But I still want to go upstairs and grab the guys. I want to make sure that they are okay. To me, they are my number one priority. Them. Dylan. Zach. Even Grant. I need to make sure nobody is hurt because of me.

  Dylan pulls me towards the door. When he opens it up, smoke comes pouring into the room and he quickly shuts the door before any more smoke can come in.

  “The fire is on our floor.” His chin trembles and his shoulders are tight.

  I am terrified. Just as terrified as Dylan is, but I know I have to remain calm right now. I force myself to be in the moment. I will freak out later. Right now, I just need to focus.

  “There’s a fire escape,” I remind him.

  His shoulder sag with relief. “You’re right. Let’s go out the fire escape.”

  The window is very hard to open. You can tell it hasn’t been opened in a long time. When Dylan eventually gets it to slid up enough, he climbs out first, holding out a hand for me to follow.

  I start to climb out and I look down.

  My stomach tenses.

  I’ve never considered myself ‘scared of heights,’ but I’ve also never been twenty floors up on a fire escape before. This is absolutely terrifying.

  I shake my head back and forth. “No. Dylan, I can’t.”

  “Zara, you have to.”

  “Nuh uh.” I lean as far against the building as I can, wanting to go back inside. I’d rather risk the fire than go out there.

  “You don’t have a choice. If you go back inside, you will die.”

  When he puts it like that...

  I start to look down once more, but Dylan puts his hand on my chin to stop me. “Do you trust me?”

  I nod.

  “Then I need you to put your trust in me right now. Trust me like you’ve never trusted anybody in your life. I will protect you and I will not let anything happen to you. I promise.” He doesn’t break eye contact with me, so I just keep looking at him. I find myself nodding.

  I am so scared. But I know that Dylan will protect me. I know that he will get me out of this.

  “Close your eyes,” he says.

  Close my eyes? I keep looking at him, too scared to move my head, even an inch. “But how will I see to walk down the stairs?”

  “Just trust me.”

  Trust him.

  I do trust him. Completely.

  I close my eyes and I try to imagine that I am on the ground and not twenty stories up.

  Dylan let’s go of my hand, and I’m about to really freak o
ut until he swoops me into his arms and starts carrying me down.

  Is he serious right now?

  I want to tell him to put me down. I mean, I can walk on my own. But I also wonder if I really could walk down on my own. I’m so scared. My entire body is trembling.

  Who knew that I would be this scared of heights? Scared enough that I’d rather sit in a burning building than go down a fire escape. There is something seriously wrong with me.

  I don’t know how long I am in Dylan’s arms. It feels like an eternity, but eventually Dylan tells me that I can open my eyes. He puts me down, and I realize that we’re on the street now. I look up and see fire pouring out of the floor we were just on.

  Whoever set the fire knew exactly where we were. That is a terrifying thought.

  We’re not safe here.

  But I take a moment to just breathe, now that I am once again on the ground.

  Dylan grabs my hand, pulling me away from the fire escape and toward the side of the hotel. Out in front, I see a huge crowd gathering, but Dylan doesn’t pull me there. He just stands as close to the side of the building as he can, peeking around the corner. I guess he sees whatever he needs to see, because he makes himself smaller against the building, and I try to do the same.

  “Get her out of here,” a familiar voice says.

  Zach.

  He comes up beside me, standing against the building like Dylan and I are.

  “What about everybody else?” Dylan asks.

  “You know the plan,” Zach says.

  Dylan nods, not saying a word.

  “Then do it.” Zach’s voice is harsh. “Zara, I love you. Be safe.”

  “Love you, too, Dad.”

  I don’t want to leave, though.

  Still, when Dylan pulls on my arm, I go with him.

  I don’t want to leave the guys behind, but I will do what I have to do.

  Not for long.

  I think I’m too much in shock to say anything when we first leave the hotel. I know that I should be asking questions. I should ask Dylan what this ‘plan’ is that nobody let me in on. And I should probably be mad that I didn’t know the plan. Once again, I was left out. But those things aren’t even bothering me.

  I sit in the passenger seat, my entire body shivering.

  I’m tired.

  I’m cold.

  But most of all, I am completely, and utterly terrified.

  Dylan reaches over the center console and grabs my hand, which helps calm me. My shaking does seem better when he’s touching me, but I’m still shaking. I can’t help it.

  “Zara...” Dylan groans out my name, bringing my hand to his lips and gently kissing it. “Baby, you need to stop shaking.”

  “I know. I’m just cold.” Even my voice comes out soft. You can hear just how much I am shivering in my tone.

  He lets go of my hand, and I’m about to protest when I see him pull on the bottom of his hoodie, pulling it over his head.

  That’s when I realize... I’m wearing pajamas. I’m just wearing an oversized t-shirt and some shorts. I’m glad I’m wearing shorts, because a lot of time I won’t even wear shorts to bed.

  When Dylan hands me his hoodie, I slide it over my head. It’s baggy on him, so it’s even more so on me. But it’s warm and it’s comfy.

  But now he’s not wearing a shirt, so I pull the shirt off under the hoodie and pass it to him. I actually think that I was wearing his shirt anyway. Or maybe Tristan’s? But they’re both the same size, anyway, so it doesn’t matter.

  “You spoil me,” I tell him.

  He grins. “I love you, Zara. I would do anything for you.”

  His response takes my breath away.

  He really would do anything for me. He did do anything for me. He carried me down twenty flights of stairs because I was too scared to walk down on my own.

  “I don’t know how I can ever thank you for what you did for me.” I blink the tears from my eyes. “Thank you. I love you, too, Dylan.”

  He grabs my hand again, squeezing it.

  The shirt is just sitting on his lap. I assume he’s waiting until we get to the airport to put it on, but I definitely don’t mind the view.

  “Where are we going?” I ask.

  “New York,” he answers.

  “New York?” I tilt my head to the side, looking at him. “Again?”

  “It’s the only flight we could get for this time of night,” he explains. “It’s a nonstop flight.”

  That’s good. That’s really good. “Is that where we’re staying?”

  He shrugs. “I have no idea. Zach just sent me the email and we’re going to figure the rest out as we go.”

  That seems like it’s just how we do things lately. We figure them out as we go. Normally I hate it, but I think I’m getting a little used to it now.

  When we pull into the parking garage at the airport, my stomach sinks as I realize we’re about to leave the country. We’re about to leave Zach and the rest of our team here. And we’re once again going to be separated. I know that it’s only temporary, but I still don’t like it.

  Dylan grins at his phone. “Zach just texted me to let me know that the guys are all okay. Nobody was hurt. They’re all together.”

  “Good.” I let out a breath of relief, but my chest still feels heavy.

  “We’re going to be okay.” He pulls the car into a parking spot, and then turns to me. “We are going to fly to New York, and then we’re going to meet up with the guys tomorrow and we’ll be together again. You’ll see. Everything is going to be all right.”

  I know that in theory, but trying to get my head and heart on the same page is a little bit difficult.

  “At least I get you all to myself,” Dylan says, a smile on his face. “This literally never happens, so, I’m not complaining.”

  “Yeah, I’m glad that it’s you,” I say. And I mean it. I’m so glad that I’m here with Dylan. I’ve missed him so much.

  Dylan let’s go of my hand and slips the shirt I gave him over his head. “I guess we should get going.”

  I gasp.” My passport. I didn’t even think to grab it.”

  He pulls something out of his pants pocket. “I did.”

  I let out a sigh of relief. It’s good that he was thinking during all the craziness that happened.

  We get out of the car and head into the airport, holding hands on the way in. There is no luggage to bring with us. Once again, I was forced to leave my stuff behind. I don’t have any clothes except what is on my back. But I still feel so fortunate. We were able to escape. We almost died, for goodness sake. Leaving our luggage behind is such a small thing in comparison. It still sucks that we have to go shopping once again.

  “Do think you the guys are okay?” I ask. “I mean... I know they’re safe and not injured, but we had to leave them behind again.”

  Dylan shakes his head. “No, I don’t think they’re okay. I think they’re probably freaking miserable. They’re worried to death about you. But they will be okay. We always are.”

  His words comfort me.

  I don’t want the guys to worry about me, but at least we know we won’t be apart for long.

  Whatever it takes.

  Tristan.

  Hearing that Zara and Dylan got safely out of the hotel is a relief. I know that I should be relieved by the fact that they’re currently on a plane, getting out of here, but I’m not relieved. I’m upset.

  Being separated from Zara sucks. It sucks being separated from Dylan, too, don’t get me wrong, but it’s different with her. Maybe because I’m in love with her.

  I now know how the guys felt when we separated in New Orleans. Well... maybe not exactly. The guys had no idea if Zara was okay or not for quite a few days, not until they finally arrived in Georgetown, so it’s not as horrible as what they went through. I can’t even imagine that. But being apart... It’s hell.

  We have a plan. We won’t be apart long. We’re going to be hopping on a flight in a few hours,
and we’re going to meet up with Zara and Dylan.

  I can’t believe we’re going back to New York... not after what happened last time.

  Last time...

  We were separated then, too, but thankfully it wasn’t for long.

  I hate that my good memories of New York were tainted.

  We will just have to go back and make good memories there. We will have to come back to all the places we’ve been and make good memories to replace the bad ones.

  “At least she’s okay.” Stefan pats my back, trying to comfort me.

  It’s such a Stefan thing to do... for him to comfort me even though I know he’s hurting just as bad, if not worse, than I am.

  Stefan is soft. Not physically. Physically, he is just as strong as I am, maybe stronger. But emotionally, he gets hurt easier than the rest of us. He feels pain more. And he’s empathetic. It’s why he’s perfect for our team. He always helps us see things from other people’s perspectives. He’s great at defusing an argument. Which is perfect, because a few of the people on our team have tempers... like Cam and Austin. Zara also has a temper, but she keeps hers in check more than the others. She likes to hide her temper, even though she’s not very good at hiding it from us. We can see her emotions clearly written on her face.

  “I don’t like this,” I tell Stefan. “It doesn’t feel right when we’re all separated like this. It’s like the person after us is getting exactly what they want.”

  “I know.” Stefan frowns. “Something feels wrong.”

  He feels it too. I don’t know why, but, in my gut, I just feel like something is wrong, even though Zach said Zara and Dylan are already on the plane. They’re safe.

  “We just have to trust Dylan,” Stefan says. “He is trained and he will protect Zara. Zach said that Dylan had to carry Zara down twenty flights of stairs because she was scared of heights.”