Pretend To Be Mine

by C. Morgan

  “Which is?”

  Clay gave me a proud fatherly grin. “I made the kid who’s going to make music that changes the world.”

  The tailor looked up at me. His arched eyebrow and pursed lips very clearly said “is this guy for real?”

  I resisted the urge to tug at the cufflinks of my shirt and looked away from the tailor before I cracked an involuntary smile. “I’m glad to hear it, man. I’m sorry I dropped the ball and didn’t really show up for you guys when you were going through all that with Jack. I could have—”

  “Shut up,” Clay said, waving his hand dismissively. “You had your own shit going on. It’s still going on. I mean, look at you.”

  I looked down at myself. “What?”

  “You’re spending who the hell knows how much money on a tailored suit to wear to your ex-wife’s wedding.”

  The tailor paused, blinked up at me, and said, “Seventeen hundred dollars on a suit to your ex’s wedding? Now that’s a new one.”

  “Who asked you, Eugene?” I asked, shooting a playful glare at my tailor.

  Eugene pinched pins between his teeth and chuckled. “Just saying. I see some crazy shit in my line of work. This? This definitely falls under that category.”

  Clay snickered. “Told you should have RSVPed with a big fat ‘go fuck yourself Mona.’”

  I shook my head. “Nah, not worth it. Besides, I’m not going for Mona. I’m going for Cora. It’s important that she sees—”

  “Her father supporting her mother, yeah, yeah,” Clay said with a second dismissive wave of his hand. “I get it, man. But sometimes you have to be firm and say no. Mona doesn’t deserve your support. She’s the one who cheated.”

  Eugene ceased pinning.

  I pointed at him. “Don’t say a word. I don’t want to hear it.”

  Eugene muttered something under his breath I couldn’t hear before resuming his work.

  I turned my attention to Clay. “Look, you don’t have to understand it, but this is the right call. And a few weeks ago, I might have sided with you and said screw it and told her I wasn’t going. But things have changed.”

  Clay lowered his left foot and leaned forward to rest both elbows on his knees. “Oh?”

  “I met someone.”

  “Oh?” Clay said again, this time with more enthusiasm. “This wouldn’t happen to be the sexy redhead Grady has been talking about, would it?”

  I groaned and rolled my eyes. Of course, Clay already knew. Leave it to Grady to go spreading my business all over the place. It was likely that all four of my college friends knew by now that I’d hit things off with the sexy escort hostess.

  “You really like her, huh?” Clay pressed.

  “I do.”

  “Grady says she’s a catch. He also says she rejected him several times over. Not good for his ego that she didn’t reject you.”

  I frowned. “Thanks?”

  Clay laughed. “Let’s be real, dude. When it comes to women, Grady has a lot of pull. You? You scream ‘unavailable.’”

  “What? How?”

  Clay shrugged and gestured at all of me. “The wardrobe, the reservation, the constant look of dismay, the glasses.”

  “I can’t help that I’m half blind,” I growled.

  Clay grinned. He was enjoying this far too much. “I’m just saying.”

  “Well… don’t.”

  Eugene snorted and played it off like he was clearing his throat.

  I arched an eyebrow. “Enjoying the free entertainment?”

  Eugene pressed the last pin into my pant leg and straightened. “I get to play silent witness to a lot of arguments in my shop, Mr. Maddox. Not all of them are amusing. But this one? This one is quite amusing. Turn.” He put his hands on my shoulders and steered me to the side to check the length of the pants. “Good.”

  He’d already done all the last adjustments to the jacket and the rest of the pants. He patted my shoulder as a signal that I was done and could get changed before leaving Clay and me alone.

  Clay leaned back. “So what is it about her that has you in such a good mood?”

  “Everything,” I said.

  Clay rolled his eyes. “Be a little more specific, will you?”

  How could I put Natalie into words? “I don’t know. She’s quick witted and funny. We laugh like a couple of teenagers when we’re together. She’s stubborn, competitive, and a ruthless businesswoman. And she’s incredibly sweet with Cora, who might be more obsessed with her than I am.”

  “Obsessed?”

  “I can’t get enough of her. Whenever our time together ends, neither of us want to say goodbye. We can talk for hours without getting tired of each other.”

  “Sounds like love, man,” Clay mused as he clasped his hands behind his head.

  I paused. Love?

  How was that possible? We hadn’t even known each other for a month. It wasn’t love. It was just exceptional compatibility.

  Had to be.

  Clay laughed. “Don’t get all in your head about it, man.”

  How could I not get in my head about it? I wasn’t sure I was ready to love anyone at all besides Cora. The last time I was in love with a woman, she’d broken my heart and left me bleeding out while she packed her bags and moved in with another man.

  Just like that.

  Could I really set myself up to be in a position like that again? Could I really trust Natalie not to hurt me?

  Or not to hurt Cora?

  I swallowed hard. “I’m going to get out of this suit.”

  Clay didn’t say anything. He watched me pass and I disappeared into the fitting room, where the suit began to feel too tight, too warm, and too heavy. I hurried to strip it off and poked myself a dozen times with Eugene’s pins in the process. I put my own clothes back on and took a moment to collect myself.

  I had to be objective about this thing with Natalie. Up until this point, I’d been looking at things through a rose-tinted lens. Sure, everything felt right and wonderful right now, but new relationships always did. It didn’t mean they would work out.

  I had a daughter to worry about who was also getting attached to Natalie.

  Maybe I needed to consider slowing things down. Maybe I needed to pull focus and just get through the wedding. Then I could step back and evaluate whether I was actually ready for this.

  Clay knocked on the fitting-room door. “What the hell is taking so long in there?”

  “Pins,” was all I managed to say.

  “Well hurry up. I’m starving. Beers and a burger on me, man. Meet you outside.”

  I listened to his footsteps fade away and braced one hand against the fitting-room door. I hung my head and thought about the woman who’d turned my life around these last few weeks. Could something that felt so good really be something I turned my back on?

  I ached for clarity and answers, but I knew they wouldn’t come because they didn’t exist. I needed to sort this out on my own and do right by my daughter. She was the priority here.

  For the first time since Natalie and I first shared a bed together, my mind went into overdrive.

  Chapter 27

  Natalie

  My suitcase sat ready at the apartment front door with my purse resting on top of it. They were a matching set, a little splurge I’d indulged in to treat myself before my trip to Paris. They were cream with gold accents and quite classy.

  Victoria leaned against the kitchen island in her pink robe. “Do you have your phone charger?”

  “Yes.”

  “Strapless bra?”

  “Yes.”

  “Razor?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well then, I think you’re good to go,” Victoria said decidedly.

  We’d spent the last half hour reviewing my checklist to make sure I wasn’t missing anything. I would be spending tonight at Rylen’s, and tomorrow morning, we’d be boarding our flight to Paris. It all felt truly surreal. After years of looking forward to a trip like this, I couldn�
��t quite believe that it was really happening.

  Me, little Natalie Fox, was going to Paris.

  I rushed to the front door with Victoria hot on my heels. She’d offered to drop me off at Rylen’s so I didn’t have to leave the car parked there all week. She took the keys from the bowl on the side table near the door while I called Muse, crouched down, and gave him a final goodbye. We’d lounged in my bed for over an hour this morning just so I could get in some extra cuddles before I went a full week without him. His cone was off and he’d aced his checkup with Rylen three days ago. He was a happy healthy boy again and I was a happy cat mom. It would have been damn near impossible for me to leave for Paris if my cat was still recovering.

  Lucky for me, I had a trustworthy roommate to look after him and give him all the love while I was gone.

  After one last review of my packing list, Victoria and I headed out the door. We listened to music on the drive, talked about Paris and the wedding, and stopped once so I could pick up pastries and coffees for Rylen and me.

  When Victoria parked outside his one-level home, she nodded approvingly. “It’s cute.”

  I took my seatbelt off. “It is, isn’t it? It needs some TLC inside. It’s a bit boring.”

  “Makes sense. He’s a single dude. Most of them don’t care about making a house a home.”

  I didn’t know if that was the case with Rylen. In my opinion, he seemed like the sort of man who very much wanted his house to feel like a home. The effort he’d put into the Christmas tree spoke volumes. I suspected he just didn’t know how to go about it. Not only that, but he was still coming out of a divorce. What person could go through that while simultaneously investing in their home and their space? Sure, a woman might be able to do it with a bit of spite for motivation, but a heartbroken man taking an interest in interior design?

  Not likely.

  I got out of the car and fetched my bags from the trunk.

  Victoria gave me a tight hug. “Have the best time, Nat. I can’t wait to hear all about it. I’ll contact you if anything happens with the business, but if you don’t hear from me, that means all is well. Don’t work on your vacation. Got it?”

  I nodded. “Got it.”

  “Promise?”

  “Got it,” I repeated. A promise was an oath I wouldn’t break and I wasn’t sure I could commit to that.

  Victoria rolled her eyes but laughed. “All right, get out of here. Have a good night with your fiancé.”

  I hurried up Rylen’s driveway. The wheels of my luggage hummed and grunted when I pulled them over cracks. I made my way to the front door and knocked. Victoria pulled away and I waved just as Rylen opened the door.

  He pulled me in for a hug and leaned outside to bring my suitcase in for me. “Let the adventure begin.” He took my hand, pulled me inside, and stole a kiss.

  A delighted giggle left me. I felt like a giddy child on Christmas Eve. In fact, this was as close to this childhood feeling as I’d been since I was about ten years old. Rylen made me feel like Christmastime, and the promise of our flight to Paris tomorrow? Well, that was excitement I could hardly handle.

  I offered him the coffee I’d picked up and the pastries, and we sat down in his kitchen together.

  “Cora and the others are already at the hotel?” I asked.

  Rylen nodded. “They left the day before yesterday. Cora has been sending me a dozen pictures a day.”

  “Can I see?”

  He pulled out his phone, opened the photo gallery, and slid it across the table to me. I picked it up and scrolled through the pictures his daughter had sent. Most were off-center horrible shots, but it made sense, seeing as how she was only five years old.

  I giggled at one picture that was mostly her thumb over the lens. “She’s a natural photographer, your kid.”

  “Right?”

  A picture of Mona came up next. She was sitting beside the man I assumed was Logan, her fiancé, and it looked like they were in a nice restaurant. She was wearing a silky black dress and vampy makeup that complemented her fair skin and dark features. She truly was a beautiful woman. The man had his arm around her slender shoulders and he was leaning in to whisper something in her ear. The smile she wore looked like joy to me.

  I looked up at Rylen. “I don’t know how you feel about this, but she does look happy, doesn’t she?”

  I slid the phone back to him. He picked it up and nodded. “I’m glad for that. Otherwise, she’d have thrown our family away for nothing.”

  A tense moment stretched between us and I wondered if the wedding drawing closer was making him a little off kilter. If I were the one in his shoes, I knew I’d be struggling with this. Based on our conversations, I knew he carried a lot of guilt over how the marriage ended, even though Mona had been the one to deliver the final blow. Was that guilt creeping up on him now and turning into doubt? Did he wish, perhaps, that he’d never agreed to attend the wedding at all?

  I reminded myself why Grady had reached out to me and paid me a decent amount of money to accompany Rylen to the wedding. I also reminded myself that Rylen had Grady double my rate. My job for this week was to make him feel like he wasn’t alone.

  That was what I was good at.

  I reached across the table and squeezed his wrist to get his attention. His blue eyes slid up to me. “You should know I indulged in a very sexy little dress for the wedding. As soon as I put it on, I thought of you.”

  I got what I wanted from him, a smile. “I can’t wait to see you in it.”

  “I can’t wait for Mona to see me in it.” I meant that. If I could get at least one jealous look from his ex-wife, I’d know I’d done a good job of playing the part of his fiancée. There needed to be one moment at the wedding, no matter how fleeting it was, where Mona realized what she’d lost by betraying her husband and starting over with another man. “Are there any family members I should make a point of introducing myself to?”

  Rylen shook his head. “I don’t think so.”

  “Oh come on. Ex in-laws? The cousin nobody likes? The uncle who drinks too much? There has to be someone.”

  Rylen flipped through more photos on his phone. “I doubt anyone will be paying much attention to me to be honest. All they’ll talk about amongst themselves is why I’m there in the first place.”

  His mood definitely wasn’t as high as it had been the past few weeks. I expected him to get playful with me about this. It was what we’d been working toward all this time.

  I fidgeted with the hem of my sweater. “I find it hard to believe nobody will want to talk to you.”

  He chuckled. “The divorce was messy, Natalie. It all blew up in my face and her family only knows her side of the story. In their eyes, I’m the bad guy. And maybe they’re right.”

  “Will you knock that shit off?”

  He tore his gaze from the phone and stared at me. “What?”

  “You. Stop playing victim. It doesn’t serve you. What happened between you and Mona is over. It’s history. The past isn’t real. All that’s real is right now. And right now, we have a week in Paris ahead of us and a chance to take a silent shot at your ex, who might I add, is the reason why your marriage ended. People make mistakes, Rylen. They fall off track and lose focus. Just because you stepped off your path didn’t give Mona any right to bring another man into your bed. Stop blaming yourself for this. The blame is on her head and her head only.”

  Rylen arched an eyebrow.

  I sat up a little straighter. “I’m sorry for using my stern voice on you but you needed to hear it.”

  “Maybe I did.”

  “Not maybe,” I muttered. “Most definitely. Now, we have all night ahead of us. Are we going to spend it convincing ourselves this wedding isn’t going to be a blast, or are we going to spend it naked making sure the wedding is fun for us?”

  “The latter option seems more appealing.”

  At least we were on the same page. Whatever this was that he was going through, he needed to s
nap out of it before we got on the flight.

  I decided to try to make him laugh. “People will have questions for us about this engagement.”

  “Questions?”

  I nodded. “Yes, questions. People always have questions for engaged couples. We have to have answers that are convincing. For example, if we were to actually get married, it would be extravagant. They’d release doves after we exchanged our vows. There’d be plenty of lace, greenery, frosted glasses, gold cutlery, bursts of plum and eggplant tones. I can picture it easily. Can’t you, fiancé?”

  Rylen didn’t say a word.

  I giggled and nudged his shin under the table with my toes. “Your turn.”

  “Slow down. We’re not actually getting married, remember?”

  “I know that. I was just messing around.” What was up with him? Why was he acting this way? Had I said something wrong? Did I offend him? Was all of this just stress over the wedding or was he not as over Mona as he’d led me to believe?

  Or as I’d led myself to believe?

  Chapter 28

  Rylen

  Natalie gripped my arm as we left the security checkpoint in the airport and made our way across the terminal to find our gate.

  “Why are airports always so beautiful at Christmastime?” she asked as she gazed up at the domed glass ceiling above our heads. White twinkle lights had been strewn lazily through the rafters, draping from one end to the next, creating a zig-zagging pattern. “I know most people hate airports during the holidays but I think there’s something magical about all the people traveling across the country and even the world to be with family.”

  “Yeah,” I said rather lamely. And we were heading to Paris to go see the family I despised so my ex-wife could marry a guy with no sense of honor or respect. I tried to pull my focus and look on the bright side like Natalie had told me to do last night. It wasn’t easy. After my fitting with Clay and the realization that I was getting serious with Natalie, I’d had to pull back a bit. She and I were supposed to have a business deal, nothing more, and the more time I spent with her, the more I realized how drawn to her I was.