After that, supper would need to be prepared.
She was simply too busy to consider Peter’s request. That was all there was to it.
Chapter Twelve
Peter dressed with care. He combed his hair and decided on his black felt hat instead of his straw one. He chose his black scarf and black gloves, too. He even washed his face before braving the cold to hitch up his buggy.
He hoped the Gundy’s weren’t around, watching through the window. He rarely if ever left with the buggy during the evening. In fact, the last time he’d gone out at night was to the Christmas caroling, and what a disaster that had been.
He strode quickly to the barn to get Champ. At least, Champ wouldn’t mind the cold. That horse was ready to get out at every opportunity. Peter smiled. He often had to hold Champ back, keeping the reins taut, or the horse would go much too fast for comfort. When Peter first got the animal, he’d let Champ go, seeing just how fast he could take the buggy.
Too fast was the answer. Champ never seemed to forget that first ride, and he fussed and tossed his head, and even plowed the dirt with his front leg, forever wanting to do the same again.
Eloise had been afraid of Champ, preferring her parents’ gentle old pony when she hitched up. So, Champ had become Peter’s alone.
He took the horse from the stall, feeding him a handful of sugar cubes as he took him out into the night air. As expected, Champ nearly pranced with excitement.
“Whoa, there, boy,” Peter said softly, close to his ear. “Settle down. You’ll get to pull soon enough.”
He slipped off his gloves, which made the hitching process much easier. Within fifteen minutes, he was in the buggy, gloves back on, ready to head to the Verkler farm. He was early. He’d be there well before seven-thirty.
No matter. He would wait.
Would Sadie show up? He truly didn’t know. Nor did he know exactly what he was going to say. His emotions were a jumble that rested just below his throat, sometimes even clogging his breathing. He didn’t have the patience to unravel it all. The only thing he knew for certain was that he wanted to see Sadie. Wanted to be with her. Wanted to watch her smile. Wanted to make her smile.
He must have been crazy to write that letter, to even be attempting to see her. She wouldn’t want to be with him. Hadn’t she made that perfectly clear? And what had possessed him to put his stone in her pony cart? She might not have even seen it. It probably fell off the bench and was wedged into the corner of her cart somewhere.
She likely didn’t remember that stone anyway. And in truth, he felt a bit naked without it. Stupid, he thought. He was acting like a downright idiot.
Well, it was too late now. If she did show, and he wasn’t there, that would be the end of it, for sure and for certain. But he didn’t want the end of it. Not anymore. He wanted a beginning. A new beginning. A fresh start where he could show Sadie how much she really meant to him.
He snapped the reins and Champ happily increased his speed, snorting his pleasure.
Peter should have warmed bricks to bring with him. He could have tucked them around Sadie’s feet to keep her warm. Did he have time to go back? No. He wasn’t that early.
His pulse increased and his breathing grew shallow. “Please be there, Sadie,” he whispered. “Please be there.”
* * *
Sadie finished washing the dishes and drained the sinks of the water. She squeezed out the washrag and hung it over the faucet to dry.
“We done?” Lizzie asked.
“Jah. We’re done.”
“Wanna play a game with us before Dat starts the Bible reading?”
Sadie glanced up at the clock. It was seven-fifteen. If she was going to meet Peter, she’d have to get a move on. But she wasn’t going to meet Peter, was she?
“Jah. A game sounds nice.”
Did the clock suddenly become louder? Sadie was certain the ticking sound was now hammering out the seconds as the hand moved around the clock. Seven-sixteen…
“Well, come on, then,” Lizzie said, pulling on her arm. Sadie allowed herself to be dragged to the front room where Matilda had already set up the monopoly game on the coffee table.
“I’m red,” she cried.
Sadie sat down on the floor on the other side of the coffee table. “I’ll be yellow.”
“Then, I’m gonna be blue.”
Matilda set out the markers. “Ready?”
Sadie craned her head, trying to peer back into the kitchen to check the time. Of course, she couldn’t see the clock from where she sat.
“I’ll start,” Lizzie declared.
“No fair. You started last time…” Matilda complained. “We’ll let Sadie start.”
Was it seven-seventeen or seven-eighteen by now? Was Peter already out there waiting for her? What did he want to say? Would she forever regret it if she didn’t go out there to find out? And she still had his stone.
She should return it.
“Sadie?” Matilda said, giving her a light punch in the shoulder. “It’s your turn.”
Sadie licked her lips and swallowed. Her throat felt tight, and her heart was beating wildly now. She jumped up. “I can’t play. I have to go.”
“What?” Lizzie said.
“Mamm,” Sadie looked over to where her mother was resting on the davenport. “I’m going out for a bit.”
Bonnie Verkler raised a brow but said nothing.
“Sorry, sisters.” Sadie dashed out of the room and flew up the stairs. Even though Peter wouldn’t see what dress she wore, she quickly slipped out of her everyday dress and her apron and put on the purple cape dress. She carefully enclosed Peter’s stone in the waistband again. She patted her hair smooth under the kapp and nearly tripped going down the steps, she was in such a hurry.
She grabbed her heaviest cape from the wash room and twisted a scarf around her neck. She stepped into her black shoes, bending to tie them quickly. Then she put on her gloves and almost exploded out the side door. Her breath caught at the cold air as she dashed across the lawn.
It had to be past seven-thirty by now. He’d probably already come and gone. Irritated with herself, she increased her speed, racing now to the end of the drive. She reached the main road, panting heavily.
No buggy.
Tears burned her eyes. And then she heard it. A horse, clip-clopping away. There he was. He was leaving already.
Should she run after him? He wasn’t going quickly at all. Yet. She could catch up to the buggy. But, land’s sake, what would that look like? Her chasing after a buggy like a desperate girl? It would be downright humiliating is what.
“Peter!” she called loudly without thinking. But he’d never hear her. “Peter!”
She put her arms around herself, fighting tears. But the buggy had stopped. She sucked in her breath. The driver’s door opened, and Peter stepped out. He stood beside the door, tall and lanky and incredibly beautiful.
In only a few long strides, he was beside her, looming over her, gazing down at her eyes, her nose, her lips.
“You came,” he whispered.
“You left,” she said, smiling now.
“I did. I figured you weren’t coming. I should have waited longer.”
She shrugged.
He cleared his throat. “Thank you for coming.” His voice was husky. He took her gloved hand in his and led her back to the buggy.
Her heart pounded, and she could hear blood rushing in her ears. Even through her glove, she felt the energy of him zinging up her arm and into her chest. She tried to calm her breathing, but it was useless. She felt almost heady as she climbed into the buggy.
He hurried around to the other side and got in. He picked up the reins and smacked them on his horse’s backside. “I’m sorry I don’t have a better buggy with a heater,” he said. “They’ve got some real nice ones these days.”
“I’m fine,” she said, folding her hands tightly in her lap as if holding on to herself for dear life.
“I thoug
ht we might just ride around the district if that suits.”
“It suits,” she replied. A sudden thought occurred to her. Was being there in Peter’s buggy being unfaithful to Aaron? She squirmed in her seat. To Aaron’s mind, it would be. She’d never outwardly agreed to them courting, but he assumed they were, and she hadn’t said or done anything to disabuse him of the notion.
She shouldn’t be there. It was wrong. She rustled under her cape and retrieved Peter’s stone from her waistband. She held it out to him.
“Here is your stone.”
She could see his face quite clearly in the yellow light of the lamps which were hung at both front corners of the buggy. She saw his frown and then the slight quiver at the corner of his lips. He stared at the stone as if he’d never seen it before. The mood in the buggy changed instantaneously. He shifted the reins to one hand and reached for the stone with his other.
“You don’t want it?” he asked slowly, and his voice faltered.
Suddenly, she knew exactly what he’d been thinking when he’d left the stone for her. The truth of it shouted through her heart—her entire being. He wanted her back.
He wanted her back. She had no doubt of it.
The knowledge of it jolted inside her like a rush of roaring water. She watched him take the stone from her as if in slow motion. She watched his gloved fingers close around it and remove it from her hand. She watched him stare at the stone, and then she watched it disappear somewhere inside his coat. What had he done with it? He had no pockets.
But he was looking at her now, his eyes shadowed in the faint light. His expression was raw and she saw his yearning, his love, his sorrow. Her throat tightened, and she could barely draw a breath. She didn’t know what to do.
She couldn’t go back to him, could she? And what about Aaron? This was wrong. All wrong. But if it was wrong, why did she want to bury herself in Peter’s arms? Why did she want to nestle into him and hear his heart beating against her ear? Why did she feel something ripping open inside of her?
“I’ll take you back home,” he said stiffly, now facing forward, every muscle of his face set. “This was a mistake.”
She pressed her hand to her mouth, fighting tears. Longing raced through her. She wanted to speak, to say something, anything, but she couldn’t. Nothing in her body seemed to be working properly. Nothing.
She remained stiff and upright and silent as he drove her straight back to her house. He stopped the buggy at the end of her drive. He remained still and didn’t even look at her as she climbed out of his buggy and fled quickly across her yard.
Chapter Thirteen
Sadie cried herself to sleep that night. She cried for Peter. For herself. For Aaron. She even cried for Eloise. By the time sleep finally overcame her, her eyes were nearly swollen shut with crying. Somewhere in the middle of the night, she stirred, and everything came rushing back. She put her pillow over her head and tried to stop the thoughts, but it didn’t help. All she could see was Peter’s hard profile when she’d left him.
Was he sleeping that night? Or was he tossing and turning and thinking of her?
She groaned and flopped on her side, keeping her pillow over her head.
* * *
Sadie’s bag was packed, and she was ready to go. Matilda stood by her side on the front porch, shivering.
“I wanted you to stay for Christmas,” she whined.
Sadie took a deep breath. “I know you did, but Mammi is all by herself.”
“She don’t got to be.” Matilda huffed out her breath.
“I’ll try again, all right? I’ll try to convince her to come to Hollybrook to live with us.”
“Okay.” Matilda thrust a piece of folded paper at her. “I drew a picture for her. Can you take it with you?”
Sadie smiled. “Of course, I can. She’ll love it. Thank you, Matilda.”
“And tell her I want to see her.”
“I’ll tell her that, too.” Sadie gave Matilda a hug. “Now remember, I cooked ahead. I don’t want Mamm in the kitchen much at all. You and Lizzie will see to it, won’t you?”
“Jah. We’ll see to it.”
“And the cleaning and all?”
Matilda made a face. “You already told us all this, Sadie.”
“I know. I worry.”
“Well, don’t. Lizzie and me will do everything.”
“And I’ll be back before you know it.”
“Okay.”
A van pulled into the drive and circled up to the porch. Sadie had already told everyone else good-bye, so she just gave Matilda one more hug and hurried down the steps. She put her bag in the van and just before she climbed inside, she turned back to the house to wave. She saw Lizzie standing at the front window, and she waved right along with Matilda.
Sadie got into her seat and pulled the van door closed. She fastened her seat belt, and they were off.
“I should have you there by noon,” the driver said, glancing at her in his rearview mirror.
“That’ll be fine,” Sadie murmured, settling in for the ride.
As they left Hollybrook, Sadie tried to busy her mind with what she would cook for the Christmas meal. Of course, there would be no decorations to see to, unlike the Englisch homes around the area. Secretly, she always admired the flashing colorful lights that decorated Englisch homes. Sometimes, she could even see their Christmas trees through the windows, and they looked amazing all decorated and lit up.
She wondered what Peter would be eating for Christmas dinner. Would he be at his family’s home or would he stay with the Gundys?
Ach. She’d better switch her mind to other things. Aaron knew she was coming. Or he should—she’d written him the approximate time she’d be arriving. But then, she doubted he’d be there to greet her. All their meetings had been secret. She figured Mammi might have guessed they were seeing each other, but her grandmother wouldn’t mention it.
She tried to relax. Tried to be excited about returning to Ainesburg. Wasn’t that what she’d wanted all along? Then why did she feel empty inside? Where was the anticipation? She blew out her breath, disgusted with herself. What was wrong with her these days? She couldn’t seem to manage her emotions at all.
Well, once she was back with her grandmother, that would change. She could sink back into her regular routine, if only for a few days. It would be a comfort, surely. Yes. Everything would be fine. Once she saw Aaron again, things would become clear. They could deepen their relationship and maybe even make plans for the future. Wouldn’t her parents be happy for her if she revealed that she had a serious beau. A fine young man, too.
She clasped her hands tightly in her lap and pressed her lips into a fine line.
Everything was going to be fine, she told herself again.
Chapter Fourteen
Lizzie jumped on the bed, glad to be back in her own room. Surely, Sadie wouldn’t mind if she slept in there while she was in Ohio. Lizzie flopped back, staring at the ceiling. It was a rare thing to have your own bedroom in an Amish home. There were usually too many children, and sharing was essential. But they were only five children at the Springer house, and with Sadie gone, only four. Of course, when the baby came, that would add another, but still, for now this bedroom was up for grabs.
Matilda had been offended when Lizzie told her she was going back to Sadie’s room for the next few days. But that meant Matilda would have her own room, too, so there was no call to grumble. Matilda had drawn a picture for Mammi … why hadn’t Lizzie thought of that? It was a right kind thing to do.
Matilda was that way. She was nicer than Lizzie, more thoughtful. Lizzie frowned. Well, there was nothing stopping her from drawing a picture now and sending it by mail. She sat up and opened the bedside table drawer. She fished about inside for the tablet she knew was there.
She grabbed a handful of envelopes and pulled them out. They were addressed to Sadie, with no return. Her brow rose. A beau, perhaps? Her pulse increased, and she inspected the envelopes
more carefully. Maybe, she should read one of the letters… Maybe, she should make sure that Sadie didn’t need them in Ohio. She could always enclose them in a larger envelope and send them along with a drawing for Mammi.
Lizzie bit her lip. Sadie wouldn’t need them. Who was she kidding? She just wanted an excuse to read them. Her fingers hovered over the first opened envelope. Curiosity burned through her. Was it a beau? And if so, who was he? Was he handsome? Tall or short?
Lizzie hesitated and then shame burned through her. She had no business prying into her sister’s mail. She must not take out Sadie’s personal letters and read them. That would be wrong. So very, very wrong.
With an exasperated moan, she replaced the envelopes in the drawer. She found the tablet and took it out. Then she stuck her hand back inside, digging around for a pen. Her hand felt a tightly folded wad of paper, and she took it out of the drawer. Strange. It was folded so small. Her curiosity now piqued beyond reason, she unfolded it.
It was a letter. To Peter. How strange…
Hardly knowing what she was doing, Lizzie read every word of it. By the time she finished, her eyes had misted over and her heart hurt. Poor Sadie. She loved Peter. Were the envelopes full of letters from Peter, then? She reached out to grab them and check, but she stopped herself. Reading a random piece of paper that was folded up was a far cry from opening a letter intentionally.
But why hadn’t Sadie mailed this letter? It was clearly to Peter Wyse. In the letter, Sadie had said that Peter would never read it. Why? Didn’t Sadie have an envelope and a stamp? Maybe she’d re-written the letter later and sent that copy instead. Maybe, she’d forgotten she’d written this one in the first place.
The letter nearly broke Lizzie’s heart. Poor Sadie. She’d been so sad.
Lizzie stood up, making a decision. She could do this for Sadie. She could mail the letter for her. Sadie had done so many things for them these past days. Why, she’d worked herself to the bone taking care of all of them. This was something Lizzie could do for her. Excited now, she ran down the stairs, heading straight for the bureau where they kept a supply of envelopes and stamps.
Christmas In Hollybrook (Hollybrook Holiday Amish Romance) Page 6